Where I Belong

Turning onto my back I hooked my thumbs into my belt loops and attempted to pull my jeans off. Getting them past my bum and thighs was as far as I got before I gave up. "Seriously Cage I-I... What is it I need you for again?" I laughed throwing my arm over my forehead. "Ava please cover yourself up. Blaze will-.."

"I am covered. Now come and help me up" I grinned moving my arm of my forehead and holding out my hand towards him. Watching him I noticed his eyes move from my face to my jeans and then back to my face. Taking out his phone he dialed a number and then put it to his ear. Sighing I dropped my arm and attempted to get myself up. Pulling the top half of my body up it was then that I realised I had not only pulled my jeans down but my panties had came down with them. So that's why he told me to cover up. Giggling to myself I glanced over to where Cage was stood only he had turned around so his back was to me. The last thing I heard him say before he hung up was "you need to get in here now". "I know you've seen a pussy before Cage" I laughed noting that he hadn't turned back around. "If you are not going to help me up then make yourself useful and get me another bottle".

"I think you've had enough" Came the rough voice that belonged to Blaze. Of course he would have phoned him. Why do they have to go running to him all the time? "Grass" I hissed sticking my tongue out at Cage. "Wanna come join my party of one?" I grinned trying to get to my feet but failing miserably. Laughing I fell onto my back turning my head so I could look at them. "Why did you have to call him? He'll just ruin my fun" I pouted.

Passing words between each other quietly Cage patted Blaze on the back before leaving closing the door shut behind him. Oh great just what I wanted, to be left alone with Blaze.. Not. Not taking my eyes of him I watched as he glanced around the room his eyes falling into slits as they stopped on his broken t. v. Sinking my teeth into my bottom lip I pulled the top half of my body up and managed to turn so I could get on my knees. Grabbing a hold of my jeans I tried yanking them up but because they were wet they wouldn't budge. Leaning back against the bedroom door he took out his smokes and lit one up. Dragging a hand through his hair he sighed before turning his focus to me. "No need to ask what you've been up to this afternoon". He said letting out a puff of smoke." Other than killing someone?" I asked grabbing a hold of the bed frame and pulling myself to my feet. He was ruining my buzz, I needed more alcohol. As if he could read my mind he slide the lock on his door. Glaring at him I crossed my arms over my chest. Walking towards me he gripped my jeans and pulled them up causing a cry to fall from my lips. Why did he have to be so rough? "You're soaking. What the fuck have you been up to?" He asked letting me go so he could slip his cut off. Pulling his jumped off he slipped it over my head. "You're going to catch the fucking cold" He growled placing his hands back on my jeans and pulling them down along with my soaked panties. The cold was the least of my worries. Taking a hold of the bottom of his jumped I pulled it down properly so it was covering my bum. "Lift you feet" He snapped. Placing my hand on his shoulder I lifted one foot and then the other. Watching him stand he threw my wet clothes into his washing basket.

"Why are you being so moody?" I asked my buzz disappearing as fast as it came. Now I was left with a moody Blaze and a thumping headache. Was he angry because I was drunk? Or maybe he was angry because Cage saw me half naked. And yes he was giving me the silent treatment. I didn't care all I wanted was another drink and maybe something a little stronger to make me feel better. Shrugging my shoulders I side stepped him and made my way for the door. Being out there has got to be better than staying in here..

"Not a chance in hell are you going out there in just that. In fact you're not going out there at all" He growled storming towards me causing me to take a step back. Not being able to help it the laugh fell from my lips. "You don't scare me Blaze. So take your caveman act somewhere else". Twisting the lock I had my hand on the door handle ready to pull only to be lifted off the ground and thrown onto his bed. "You can't do this" I yelled balling my hands into fists wincing as the pain shot through my right hand. Bringing it into eye sight I noticed my knuckles were all burst open and I had a nasty cut on my palm.

"I owe you a mirror as well as a t. v" I muttered running my finger over my knuckles. Sighing I crawled up his bed so I could rest my head against his head board. Taking a seat beside me he took my hand in his examining it. "Doesn't look like you need stitches but they do look pretty nasty and swollen. Look Ava I know what happened today was bad and scary but I'm glad you did it because if you hadn't you wouldn't be here and I hate to think what that bastard would have done to you but babe this isn't you" He sighed letting go of my hand. "Getting drunk in the middle of the day, prancing around in nothing but underwear. Heck you made Cage blush for fuck sake".

"He came in at the wrong time"

"He heard a bang and thought he'd check it out. I'll tell you this though it'll be the first and last time he'll ever see you like that. Fucker did the right thing by calling me".

"Oh yeah because the only one aloud to see me naked is you" I huffed rolling my eyes. "Why is my mom at some cabin?" I asked a yawn escaping my mouth. I knew something was going on or going to happen but I wanted to see if he would tell me what it was. "Club business now you get some sleep we're still heading out tonight". Obviously something big if he couldn't tell me. "Vagos have nothing to do with my house" I said as he got off the bed turning to look at me. "That guy made a comment about my daddy buying the house for me so I know it wasn't them".

"Doesn't matter. Get some sleep we'll leave when your not drunk and your feeling better". Just as I was about to say something he walked out the room slamming the door shut behind him.

....

Peeling my eyes open I jumped up when I released it was dark outside. How long had I slept? Pulling the covers back I placed my feet onto the floor and got myself up. Holding my head I groaned at how bad I felt. I really needed to stop turning to alcohol to make me feel better. It wasn't worth the way I felt when I woke up.

Flushing the toilet I washed my hands drying the off on a towel that was lying in a heap on the floor. Looking around the room I groaned at the mess I had made. The broken glass from the mirror still lay shattered on the floor along with splatters of my blood. Coming to the decision that I would clean it up later I exited the bathroom. Rummaging through the washing basket I cursed when I found that my jeans were still wet. Only other option I had was to find a pair of Blazes trousers or go out there flashing my ass to the world and I don't think my dad would appreciate that. Rolling his jogging bottoms up at the waist I tied his T-shirt into a knot at the back. If I had to wear his clothes then I at least had to try and make them fit. Wincing as I pulled the bobble from my knotted hair I ran my fingers through it before tying it up into a messy bum. I probably didn't look my best but fuck it if I gave a shit. Opening the door to Blazes room I frowned hearing the loud music coming from the bar area. Don't these people ever have a quiet night?

Making my way into the bar area my eyes landed on the mass of people surrounding me. What the hell was going on? Making my way through I smiled and nodded my head at everyone I passed. Did I want to? No but I also didn't want to be rude. Catching sight of Tommy with two girls sitting on each knee it came to me why the place was packed. Even though Tommy was home and well I didn't feel like celebrating not after the shitty day I had. Managing to sneak past my dad I snuck out the front door. Sucking in the fresh air I passed a few members from another charter smiling as I went. Walking towards my car I jumped up sitting on the bonnet. It was always peaceful out here when there was no one to bother you. Leaning back I placed my hands behind my head looking up at the stars.

If I could be anywhere in the world right now..?

"You seriously want to catch the cold?".

I'd be a million miles away from him...

"Why do you feel the need to sneak up on people?"

"Bad habit darlin'. How you feeling?" He asked leaning against the front of my bonnet his back to me. "Let's just say I won't be turning to alcohol every time I've had a shitty day. I don't know why I put myself through it" I mumbled mostly to myself. "I wasn't talking about the alcohol sweets. How are you feeling with what happened today?". Great something I didn't want to talk about but had to. What was he expecting me to say? 'Yeah Blaze I'm doing great. I feel good after shooting someone in the head'. "How do you think I'm feeling?" I asked moving down slightly towards him. "I can't stop thinking about it, I killed someone" I whispered low enough so only he could hear. I don't know how they did it. How could they go on living knowing they've killed another human being? How did they live with the guilt? Settling his hand on my knee he gave it a little squeeze. "First kill is always the worst. I can remember mine like it was yesterday. Believe it or not sweets but I never used to have the guts to pull the trigger. My first kill earned me my VP patch" He smiled as if playing the scene in his head.

"Is that suppose to make me feel better?" I asked placing both feet on the ground "That the first kill is always the worse? I can't deal with knowing I've killed someone and here you are grinning like a fucking idiot. Honestly how do you look at your self everyday knowing the shit you do?"

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"I kill because I have to Ava not because I fucking want to. Don't sit here and think you are any better than the rest of us. You pulled that trigger darlin', you killed someone. Yeah you'll feel guilty for it now and who knows maybe you'll feel guilty for the rest of your life but what you need to remember is if you hadn't of pulled that trigger you would have been the one fucking dead. Now suck it the fuck up, get in there and welcome Tommy home" He growled the look on his face telling me I better not argue with him.

"You're an asshole" I hissed storming away from him.

"Ah there she is" Tommy grinned pushing both girls off his knee. "Come give you're uncle Tommy a hug". Rolling my eyes I gave him a quick hug before taking a seat next to him.

"Its good to see you home Tommy, how are you?" I asked my eyes following Blaze as him and my dad disappeared down the hall. I wonder what they were up to now? "I'm great darlin' never felt better and its all because of you. I owe you big time Ava and just know uncle Tommy will always have your back".

I always liked Tommy from the moment I met him and it was nice knowing I always had someone to talk to other then having the awkwardness I got around my dad when we talked. "What's going on with you darlin'? You don't seem your usual self" Tommy asked knocking me out of my thoughts.

"I'm fine" I lied knowing he could see right through it. I wasn't going to bombard him with what had happened, especially not when my own dad didn't know. Hearing the roar of his voice before the heavy stomps of his boots on the floor I swallowed down my fear. I think he just found out.

"Turn that fucking music off" He roared the full place growing quiet. Pacing around the clubhouse I watched as everyone watched my dad trying to figure out what he was going to do next. Why did he have to tell him tonight? Of all the nights he could have picked he picked the night Tommy got out.

"Get your asses to the god damn table" He snapped his voice like venom causing the hairs on the back of my neck to stand up. As everyone began to follow him I sunk deeper into my chair not moving my eyes of my dads back. "That means you too" He roared turning his head so he could look at me. "Lock this shit down until I say otherwise".

...

Playing with the bottom of my t-shirt I chewed on the inside of my mouth. Being in a room filled with a dozen men was intimidating. I had been sat in the same position for over an hour watching and listening to what there next move was going to be.

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"How in gods name did this fucking happen?" My dad growled his fist banging of the table. "I knew it wasn't safe for you to be living alone but no you had to go and fucking do it anyway". Gripping the arms of the chair I was sitting on I grit my teeth to stop me from saying something I would later on regret. "Fuck" My dad hissed pulling out a cigarette and lighting it up.

"We'll handle it prez, we always do" Tommy pipped up my head turning so I could look at him. "She can lay low while we sort it out" He finished giving me a small nod of the head.

"She killed there VP Tommy. They'll want her head on a stick. How the fuck can I bring Aubrey back when shits about to hit the fan".

I killed there VP?

"They don't know she killed him. They'll think I did it after the little present I sent them" Blaze smirked taking a long draw of his smoke. "We just need to prepare for what's coming. Ain't nothing we haven't handled before". "Yeah those little maggots seem to forget who Franko Mendez is and what he's capable of, what we're capable of" Cage grinned.

"They won't retaliate for at least a couple of weeks. In the meantime I want an extra two bodies with Aubrey and Lily. All the women and children stay here and do not get to go out without someone with them. Get in contact with our guys in Canada and Mexico. If its going to go down the way I think it is then they need to be clued in. Keep your eyes and ears open and never ride alone". Hitting the gavel my dad grunted as everyone but Blaze got to there feet.

"I'm not finished with you yet" My dad scowled as I got to my feet. Sinking back into the chair I bit my lower lip waiting for the blow that I knew was coming. I didn't know the guy I killed was Vagos VP but I knew I had just caused a lot of shit for my dad and the club.

"Dad I'm sorry" I whispered ignoring Blazes stare. What else could I say? I couldn't exactly turn back time. "Never apologise for killing a bastard like that. He had it coming, Im just pissed you got to do it and not me" My dad sighed causing me to frown.

"Bastards the reason I got put behind bars for 8 years. Don't you ever be sorry for what you did. I'll handle the shit that's coming our way. Your going with Blaze that plan still stands. Am I clear?" He asked my brain hurting with the amount of questions I wanted to ask.

"How did he get you put in jail?" I asked my dad looking at Blaze before setting his eyes back on mine. Was he going to tell me? I knew he was put behind bars for grievous bodily harm but I wanted to know the full story. I knew never to believe everything I read.

"I left him for dead, police caught me at the scene".