SWNOVELS HUGE X4: Chapter 19
I get through the next few hours by pure distraction; I use what I find in their cupboards to bake and work on elaborate sugar paste decorations to finish the chocolate cupcakes. When I’m baking I’m usually in a zone but today I can’t concentrate. My mind whirs with images of the O’Connell brothers facing Brad. His smarmy smirk and all the bad things his toxic mind could think of to tell the twins. His threats. What he might have already done with the photos.
I know he’s a coward – coward of epic proportions – but that only seems to make him more vicious in his vindictiveness and I don’t want that turned on my boys.
My boys.
I stop working on the red sugar rose that I’m crafting and take a deep breath. My boys. It feels so right to think of them that way. It feels completely natural to be standing here in their apartment, making them treats and awaiting their return. There’s no fear that I’ll get hurt. No fear that they’ll take hold of my heart and then discard it.
My boys are special. One of a kind. Raised by a beautiful mother who taught them the value of women and the way to handle them with respect and care.
As I think this I feel a wave of peace wash over me. Kerry is right. I need to trust myself and to have confidence that what is in my heart is right and true. I need to let go of the things that don’t really matter to me. Mom’s opinion. Frank’s opinion. The opinion of outsiders who are never going to be important in my life. If Carrie could do it and Katelin too, then why not me?
In my heart I’m as brave as them, I’ve just had my confidence knocked so much that for a while I forgot who I am, but standing here in this kitchen I feel the realness of me bubbling to the surface. I’m Bethany Blane, the girl who did a bungee jump when she was eighteen-years-old, the girl who ignored her mom and built her dream business, the girl who left a dangerous and controlling man behind because she refused to be miserable anymore.
I’m Bethany Blane who danced on the beach without a care, who swam in the inky black sea at midnight with nothing on.
I’m Bethany Blane and I’m going to be the me that I want to be. The real me.
I rush the rest of the cake decorations and pack everything away leaving four cupcakes on the counter for the men who are out there defending my honor. Then I head to the shower to prepare myself.
Under the water, I feel as though the imposter that Brad shaped me to be is washing away. I use Liam’s razor to make myself smooth and after, rub gorgeous-smelling lotion over my whole body. I find my prettiest underwear – a soft pink lace set with panties that tie at the side with ribbon – and put it on. I style my hair and apply natural make-up to pink my cheeks and widen my eyes.
All the time I’m preparing I’m thinking about them coming home. Callum with the dark sparkle in his eyes and his naughty sense of humor. Liam with his light humor and gentleness. Matty with his insight and protectiveness. Ryan with his fierce determination.
Four men who are all so different but feel so right.
Four men who I trust with my life and my heart.
Four men who I’m going to give myself to and damn the consequences.
I slip on a soft-pink silk robe and wait.
When the key sounds in the lock I take one last look in the mirror and stand. Their voices are upbeat. I think it’s Callum I hear laughing the loudest. Someone mentions the cakes and then there’s a low whistle of appreciation. Mom always said the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach. Maybe she was right on that one thing.
I leave Liam’s room slowly, head into the open plan area and smile at the sight of four gorgeous men tucking into my cakes. A warmth fills me as I hear one of them moan in delight. It’s Ryan who’s the first to notice I’m standing there watching. He smiles, scrunching up the cake wrapper.
“Damn, Bethany. You know how to bake,” he says. The others turn and I see Liam and Callum notice what I’m wearing. I have no idea what they’re thinking. Maybe they’re hoping that I’m going to take them to bed and we’ll carry on where we left off.
“What happened?” I ask them because I need to know that they’re okay and that everything worked out the way they said it would.
“You should have seen his face,” Matty laughs. “He shit himself when we turned up on his doorstep.”
“He tried to pretend that he wasn’t bothered by the fact that we knew all his skeletons but the fucker was sweating,” Liam says.
“So what did he say?”
“Not much after we told him that if we find out he’s come anywhere near you his life will be over.”
“And you think he’ll back off.”
They all laugh as though the alternative is absolutely ridiculous. “I think his dick climbed up inside his body he was so damn scared,” Ryan says.
I shudder at the thought but take great pleasure in adding, “It wouldn’t have had far to climb.”
They all laugh again. “That’s my girl,” Callum says and I can feel a blush rising up my cheeks. I look at these men in their snug t-shirts and fitted jeans, bodies, and faces that would make angels fall from heaven just to worship at their feet, and for a moment I don’t feel worthy. All my mental and physical preparation hasn’t really equipped me for this moment, but at the same time, I know what I want.
They all smile at me as I stand in silence probably looking like a frightened rabbit. I’m angry with myself because that isn’t how I want them to see me. I want to be Rio. Fearless and free. I remember the feeling I had when I was spinning in circles on the warm Jamaican sand and it gives me the courage I need. One small step now and I can take what I want.
My hands are shaking as I look down to untie the knot on my robe. The room is suddenly so silent and I imagine four sets of mesmerizing gray eyes fixed on me. I’m wet between my legs and no one has even touched me yet. Just the thought of slipping this robe from my shoulders and standing in front of them in my lingerie is enough to turn me on. I finally get the knot loose and I allow the silky fabric to slide open, parting it with my hands until they can see everything I’m offering up to them.
I look up slowly and the hunger I see on their faces is all I need to give me the confidence to lose the robe completely.
“Bethany,” someone says reverently. Who I don’t know. Their voices are so similar; low, sexy and masculine.
“Fuck,” someone else mutters. This time I’m brave enough to look. Ryan. His gaze is like an inferno; desire’s fire licking at my skin. No one moves and I’m left thinking that maybe they need a little something more. I reach to the center clasp of my bra and unhook it.
As it drops to the floor, they all move in unison. One of them is imposing enough. Four is something else. With Liam and Callum, I know the routine. Liam at the front, Callum at the back. With Matty and Ryan now in the picture I have no idea what to expect. They stand around me like four points of a compass. Liam at north, Callum at the south. Ryan to the east and Matty to the west.
“What are you doing, Bethany?” Liam asks. His hand goes to my shoulder and squeezes as though I need reassurance. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Do what?” I look up and see that his expression looks uncomfortable rather than aroused and for a second I don’t get it. Then I realize that he thinks I’m doing this out of gratitude. To repay the debt for them telling Brad to back off. “I know that,” I tell him softly. “I want to.”
“But you said…” Callum’s hands rest on my hips, his whispered words delivered directly into my ear.
“I was scared,” I say. “But I’m not anymore.”
Ryan’s hand goes to my cheek and he turns my head so he can press a kiss on my lips. “I knew you’d come around,” he says cockily.
“Oh, you did, did you?” I say. He steps back and tugs his t-shirt over his head with one pull, revealing a chest that would make angels weep.
“I did,” he grins. “We’re just too much to resist.”
Matty chuckles to my left and I turn to him. “Were you so confident too?” I ask, taking his hand and putting it to my breast. His eyes go to where my softness rests against his skin and he groans. “I hoped,” he says squeezing gently.
“Looks like your wish came true,” I say softly, leaning in to kiss him.
Then I feel hand everywhere. Stroking my curves, gripping and squeezing. Two on my hips, two on my waist. Each breast in the hand of a different brother. Lips on mine; soft and tasting of chocolate cupcake and man. My new favorite flavor. A mouth on my neck, suckling. Lips on my nipple and finally fingers between my legs.
“So wet,” Ryan says, and I turn to him, watching as his eyes glaze. His fingers are thick and long, pushing aside my panties, sliding between my labia, spreading me open and pushing inside. I moan as he draws them out slowly, relishing the push and pull, widening my stance so he can get deeper, use more fingers, anything to take me higher.
“My turn,” Callum says, and Ryan pulls out. Callum’s fingers feel different. Maybe it’s the angle because he’s penetrating me from behind. Every thrust of his hand brushes something inside me that feels so damn good. Ryan’s fingers find my clit and I can barely stand. When Liam latches his mouth to one nipple and Matty to the other I cry out so loudly that I know the neighbors will hear. Fuck. I don’t care. It feels too good. Liam gently bites my nipple, sending a current of pleasure between my legs, adding to the sensations his brothers are already building there. . Ryan circles my clit slowly, slowly until I’m thrusting against him for more. When Callum puts his hand around my throat and squeezes just a little I come in a rush, sagging against him as wave after wave of violent pleasure washes over me.
“She’s perfect,” Matty says slowly, licking my nipple gently.
“She is,” Liam agrees.
“Whose bedroom?” Ryan asks, obviously eager to get things moving to a whole new level. My pussy clenches at the thought, despite the fact that I just had an orgasm and should be spent.
“Yours,” Matty says. “You’ve got the biggest bed.”
Ryan laughs. “Yeah. I was always more confident than you guys.”
Liam strokes my face. “He was convinced we’d find someone so we could be together. He was the one that persuaded us to get this place too.”
I smile at Ryan. “Looks like you got your wish.”
“Not yet I haven’t,” he says and reaches to pick me up. I squeal as he strides across the room with me in his arm, heading to the door at the far end of the hall. It’s open and the room is big. The bed, as promised, is huge. Enough space to sleep us all if we wanted.
“Your palace, Princess,” he says, resting me on the comforter. The others come in the room behind him, all starting to shed t-shirts, boots, socks and jeans. I feel like I’m living a dream. I should be so lucky to be with one of these men, let alone all four of them. My mouth is watering at the sight of so much firm chest, perfect muscular thighs, and bulging briefs.
Damn.
I don’t realize that I’ve said that out loud until they all burst out laughing.
“I think she likes us,” Matty says, grinning.
“I know she does,” Callum says. He’s the first to get naked, taking his cock in hand and fisting it until it’s rock hard. He drops to his knees in front of me and spreads my legs, reaching to untie the ribbons at the sides of my panties and exposing me to his brothers.
His mouth is on my pussy before I even register his intention, tongue parting my folds and finding my swollen clit with its tip. I lean back, resting on my arms so I can watch what he’s doing. I don’t get to enjoy the view for long, though. Matty’s at my side, stroking my breasts gently, watching as my nipples pucker with excitement. He kisses each one, then my lips too. “I want you so much,” he says, licking at the underside of my top lip as his brother laps between my legs. Ryan takes his place on my other side, reaching to hook his hand under my leg so he can spread me open even more.
“I want a taste,” Liam says, and Callum moves immediately, letting his twin take his place. I watch as Liam breathes against my pussy, his tongue tracing languid circles around my clit. Oh, it feels so good. Not just the physical contact but also the eyes on me and the intention that is buzzing in the room. Each of these men wants to fuck me and I want them to. So badly.
“I want in first,” Ryan says.
“Competitive, much,” Callum laughs.
“Listen,” Ryan says fiercely. “You’ve already had the privilege.”
“And that gives you dibs?” Matty shakes his head, but he doesn’t look angry. There’s love in his eyes for his twin and that makes my heart swell too.
“Ryan’s always had the least patience,” Callum laughs.
“Well, maybe I’ll make him wait,” I say, raising my eyebrow. Ryan’s eyes flash with challenge but he doesn’t say a word.
“Matty first,” I say, still staring at Ryan. His nostrils flare and I know he’s pissed. Riling him up turns me on and I bet if I make him wait he’s going to take me extra hard.
Callum tosses Matty a condom and he’s sheathed and read within seconds. His cock is long and straight and as thick as his brother. As Liam moves to the side, Matty tells me to shift up the bed. He kneels between my legs and strokes his thumb in my wetness, testing to see if I’m ready. I know I am. When he uses the tip of his cock to probe my labia he can really feel it too. He sinks in deep in one thrust and then holds still. He bends to kiss my lips softly, gently teasing them open and using his tongue to perfection.
Then he moves.
Oh my gosh. Matty does this thing with his hips. There’s a twist and grind that feels so damn good I have to close my eyes to drown in the pleasure. Someone takes my right hand and wraps it around a hot and heavy cock. I don’t know who it is and I don’t care. I love the way it slides in my palm and the feel of the thrusts nudging into the circle of my fists. Matty rises up onto his knees, hooking an arm around my leg and shifting it onto his shoulder. I open my eyes and find Ryan climbing in close, his cock in his hand. I reach out to take hold of it, cupping the rounded head and circling it gently. His eyelids droop and I feel bad that I rejected him before. I want to make him feel good. I want to see him unravel before me just so I can put him back together again.
“I want to suck it,” I say to him, my eyes bright with challenge.
He swears under his breath and shifts forward, bringing his dick close to my mouth. I open and he pushes inside gently. God, he feels good. So hot, and salty-sweet against my tongue. I rest my hand on his thigh and I can feel him trembling. Maybe it’s the restraint needed to allow me to control the movements. I can guess he must want to thrust so badly, but at this angle, it would be impossible for me to take. Ryan slips his hands into my hair, cupping the back of my neck as he leans over me. Matty speeds his thrusts, his cock swelling impossibly inside me. Hands caress my breasts, pinching gently at the nipples and I groan around Ryan’s cock. I feel it swell at the vibrations, and his hips jut forward just a little, hitting the back of my throat. He pulls back then, and I watch as he fists his cock with one hand, fingers seeking out my clit with the other.
“Oh,” I moan as the sensations of so many hands and Matty’s big cock become too much for me to take.
“Harder,” Ryan orders as though he can tell I need more. Matty grips my thighs tight enough to sting and pounds into me. Callum’s cock swells in my fist and he tells me if I don’t stop he’s going to come.
It’s the look on his face and the thought of him coming all over me that pushes me over the edge into a flash of orgasm so bright that it’s like looking directly at the sun. Ryan slows his finger on my clit to prolong the waves that spread through my body like hot water. I can feel my pulse in my throat and my hands, and then Matty groans as he comes too.
I wish I could see it happen. I wish he’d pulled out and come all over my belly. I wish there was no condom between us and he was filling me up right now. I could put my hands between my legs and feel it leaking out. Matty looks dazed as he grips the base of his cock and pulls out carefully. He leans in to kiss me, nuzzling my cheek and chins with his nose, breathing deeply and making a happy rumble in his throat. “Damn, Bethany,” he says and I smile up at him feeling euphoric.
When Matty goes to get cleaned up, Ryan is there to fill his place. “Still want me to go last?” Ryan asks, his voice husky, before he kisses my lips hard. He holds my gaze prisoner, his eyes flashing with challenge. I like this game we’re playing. It feels dark and dangerous. A part of me wants him so wound up that he’s completely out of control by the time he gets his turn.
I nod and he kisses me again, this time slipping his tongue into my mouth. He kisses like I imagine he’ll fuck. Hard, desperate and all-consuming. I slip my hands into his hair, tugging him against me, letting him know how much I want him even though I’m making him wait.
“I think she likes torturing him,” Callum says chuckling.
“I think he likes it too,” Liam says.
“You gonna get the fuck off our girl so we can make her see stars again?” Callum says.
Ryan rises up on his forearms and scowls. “There’s too much fucking talking going on in this bedroom.”
“Too much kissing and not enough fucking, you mean.” Callum flops onto the bed and sits with his back against the brown padded headboard. He pats his thigh. “You gonna crawl up here, baby girl. I’ve got something good for you.”
I smile as he fists his cock, teasing me with its impressive size. Damn. I’m ready to go again, but who can blame me with four gorgeous men to enjoy. I feel as though I’m finally where I need to be. Surrounded and protected on all sides.
Ryan rolls off me and slaps my thigh.
“Go get him,” he says and grins.
I do as Callum suggests and crawl up the bed, taking my place on his lap. He tugs me closer bringing his hands to my face so he can kiss me tenderly. “There she is,” he says, tucking my hair behind my ears. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” I tell him. I stroke his shoulder and his chest gently to show him how tenderly I feel about him. Sitting on his lap feels like coming home. I’m so ready that when he raises me up, I slide down on him and it’s perfection.
“That’s it,” he says. “That’s where I want to be.”
“That looks so good,” Liam says and I turn to see the rest of my boys watching me ride Callum.
Liam comes closer until he’s kneeling behind me. His hands grip my hips, forcing my thrusts higher and harder. Every impact hits my clit perfectly until I can feel another orgasm rising inside me. “You like fucking my brother?” Liam whispers in my ear. Oh…it sounds so dirty and wrong, but it feels so right.
“Yes,” I say.
“And when you’re done with him, are you going to fuck me too?” Liam’s hands move to squeeze my breasts, pinching the nipples to match the rhythm of my movements.
“Yes,” I gasp. “Oh…oh.”
Liam slaps my ass and it stings so perfectly. Callum takes hold of my hair in a grip that almost too tight and kisses me like he’s a drowning man and I’m his last breath. I feel the same way. Time slips as I’m lost in the motion and moment, eyes closed, body totally given over to pleasure.
“Baby,” Callum grunts as he grinds into me hard. “Fucking…fuck.”
He seizes, his whole body going tight and I’m right there with him, back arching, mouth in an O shape that reflects my ecstasy. He holds me close for way longer than I’m expecting and to be honest, I’m grateful. Three orgasms and I’m feeling pretty wrung out. My hips are aching and I’m panting like a dog after exercise. After all my gym sessions I should have more stamina than this but I guess it’s going to take some time to get used to so much sex in such a compressed period of time. Either that or I’m going to have to schedule them on a rota of some sort. Not sure how that suggestion would go down.
“You feeling okay, baby?” Liam asks, nuzzling my neck from behind. I nod and Callum releases me from his embrace. I turn and wrap my arms around Liam’s neck and he scoops me away from his brother. Liam smells so delicious; cologne and warm skin. A scent that reminds me of vacation and freedom. As he lays me on my back I pull him in close, smoothing my hands over his shoulders and rounded biceps, tugging his hips against mine. “Do you need a break?” he asks, pushing my hair off my sweaty forehead and kissing the tip of my nose. I shake my head because now that he’s so close, I want him even closer.
“I’ll be gentle,” Liam says, nuzzling my neck and stroking my breasts. I glance around and find Ryan sitting the closest. He’s holding his cock tightly, his eyes firmly on Liam’s hands.
Liam positions himself carefully and begins to push inside slowly. He’s so measured and controlled that it doesn’t hurt at all. “You’re so beautiful,” he tells me. “Perfect.”
I smile up at him, and he kisses both corners of my happy mouth. His arms go around my back so I’m completely engulfed by his strong form and it feels amazing.
“There he is, Mr. Smooth,” Callum says. I can hear the grin in his voice.
“Nothing wrong with a bit of romance,” I say, breathlessly. Everything Liam is doing is totally perfect.
“You feel so good,” he tells me. “So soft, so warm.”
The more he talks, the deeper I fall into this moment. I realize that it’s still possible to have moments of intimacy, even when there are others around. It’s possible to focus on one person and not at the expense of the others. Liam wants a deeper connection and that’s fine with me. More than fine.
His hips grind into mine slowly and firmly, each trust sending pleasure spiking through me. I want to come again. I want him to know how good he’s making me feel. I just don’t know that I can. Three is a record for me. Anything more would definitely break my brain. The thing is that Liam doesn’t seem to be prepared to finish without me. His stamina is admirable. The small of his back is wet with sweat from holding himself back.
“Are you close?” he whispers and I have to shake my head. I used to fake it with Brad all the time but I’m not prepared to do it now. I want the real thing or not at all. I don’t want to mislead these men in any way.
“Too much,” I say and his mouth quirks.
“Or maybe not quite enough.”
I’m about to correct him, reassure him that he’s plenty enough for me, then he calls for Ryan and I shut my mouth.
“Get over here,” he tells his brother, rolling us onto our sides. I feel the bed depress behind me and Ryan positions himself against my back. A shiver of uncertainty runs through me. What do these brothers have planned for me?
Ryan’s hand slides over my breasts, across my belly and hips. Liam moves slowly, hitching my leg up high so he can angle himself right. I feel Ryan’s hand move lower and then the press of his cock against my ass. I freeze, waiting to see what he’s going to do. I’m not ready for what I think he might be planning. I’ve never let anyone do that, and Ryan is so big. That would definitely hurt. The rounded end of his cock presses where I was expecting and fearing, and I put my hand on his hip and grip. I think he must sense that I’m scared because he kisses my neck.
“I’m not going to fuck you there,” he says. “Well, not tonight. Just let me rub you. It’ll feel good.”
I’m looking into Liam’s eyes and he nods. I imagine what it would be like to experience that and, although I’m fearful, there is a part of me that wants to know what it would be like. I trust them to be gentle, I’m just not ready for it right now.
The brothers fall into a synchronized rhythm of push and withdraw. Liam thrusts deep and grinds against my clit as Ryan rubs at the sensitive ring of muscle that has always been so private for me. It feels better than I could have imagined. After a while I’m rolling my hips, almost urging him to press harder. Liam is swelling and I’m moaning and Ryan is silent and controlled. I’m so close but I just need a little something more. Then Ryan’s fingers find my clit and I’m lost. Liam must feel my pussy contracting because he finally lets himself go and rides me through wave after wave of pure bliss. Ryan keeps rubbing and I can’t take it…it’s too amazing. Too much. Being with these men is blowing my mind, and I still have Ryan left to please.
I make it sound like a chore, but it isn’t. It’s amazing. Totally amazing to be able to turn and kiss Ryan and make him moan. It’s bliss to feel his strong arms come around me, and his teeth nip my neck. It’s completely perfect when he flips me over onto my front and spreads my legs wide.
“You wanted to save me until last,” he murmurs against my neck. “You got enough energy left to take me?”
I nod, even though I’m feeling a lot like I need to sleep for a month.
He reaches between my legs and touches me gently. I’m feeling sore now but I won’t tell him no. He’s been patient and now he gets his rewards, and I know I’m going to get mine too.
He cock is resting along the seam of my ass and he shifts until it drops lower to push against my entrance. I’m still so wet from my last orgasm that he slips in the first inch. After that, it’s harder, but he’s patient. He takes my hair in a rough ponytail and holds it tight, twisting my neck so he can kiss my mouth. It feels so good to be totally at his mercy. It feels even better because I know I’m giving Ryan what he needs.
“Fuck,” he murmurs against my lips as he pushes harder and works his way in deeper. His knees nudge my legs open even wider, the weight of his body squashing me into the comforter. I squeeze my eyes shut and moan with every thrust. He’s just so big, so heavy, so masculine, that I’m totally overwhelmed. “You love that, don’t you, baby?” he pants against my ear, and I nod because I do. So much I want to cry. I feel a hand slip into one of mine, fingers interlacing and holding tight. It happens on the other side too. Ryan lets go of my hair and nuzzles my ear, then kneels up so he can take hold of my hips and pound into me even harder. A hand strokes my hair. Different lips kiss my cheek. Another voice tells me I’m beautiful, perfect, a dream come true.
My heart swells until it feels like it might burst. Knowing they are all there, watching what’s happening has me on fire. Remembering how each of them felt inside me while Ryan fucks me is mind blowing. I moan so loudly and it spurs Ryan on.
“That’s it, Bethany,” he says, giving my ass a slap. Come on my cock.” His voice is so gruff by this point and I can’t hold it in. I tell him he feels so big, so good, so fucking perfect. I tell them all that I’ve never experienced anything this amazing before. I tell them that I want them, over and over and over and when I’ve finished pouring out my soul my body takes over.
“I’m gonna…oh, oh, ohhhh…” I gasp. “I’m coming.”
And I do. Oh, I do. Wet as a river, tight as a bow, hot as a raging inferno. I can’t seem to catch a breath but I don’t care because I know this is it for me. Nothing could ever compare to the way I feel right now, surrounded by the four men who have dropped into my life like a gift and wrapped me up in their embrace.
Ryan isn’t far behind me, his cock swelling and pulsing frantically between my legs. I feel his sweat drip onto my back as he leans down to kiss me between my shoulder blades. I turn to kiss him and taste it on his lips. His eyes are half-closed, sex foggy, and sleepy but his smile says it all.
“Fuck me!” he says. “You better be planning on staying, girl, because there isn’t a chance in hell that any of us are ever letting you go.”
It’s been only a few days since I flew to Jamaica to witness my sister take a step into a new life. I wasn’t expecting that I’d be doing the same. My heart was bruised and my soul was scarred, but then these men found a way to make me see that I didn’t have to feel like that. I could find the way back to myself again. I could be the me I was before Brad crushed my spirit. I could dance on the sand with the wind in my hair and the sound of the ocean crashing in my ears and feel free.
As Callum and Liam, Ryan and Matty help me get comfortable on the bed, drape me with covers and snuggle in around me, I feel like I’m in a dream. Can a person’s life drift into snow-globe perfection this way?
Good things like this just don’t happen to me, or they didn’t until I crossed paths with the O’Connell brothers.
The boys doze and I lie between them, relishing the peace I’m feeling for the first time in my life. They’ve shown me that my journey can begin again and that they are the perfect travel companions to make my life complete.
I know the road is going to be rocky, but with my twins beside me, I’m certain that everything is going to be fine.