SWNOVELS Beyond the Game: Chapter 17
It’s the middle of the night or early in the morning, when I open my eyes after finally succumbing to the events of the day. Our baby was born at 10:23 PM this evening thanks to the help of the man currently holding her.
My daughter.
Our daughter.
As I open my eyes, I hear his voice singing softly, so I turn my head and spot him stretched out on the small couch in my hospital room. Bent at the knee, because he can’t actually stretch his whole self out on the small-scale furniture, he has a baby blanket draped over his lap and cradles our baby in front of him. He softly rubs his large hand over her head and then down the front of her as he whispers to her.
“You are so beautiful; do you know that?” he asks her. “Yes, you are. You look just like your mommy. And one day I’m probably going to want to kill any man who dares to look at you, but right now, I can’t stop looking at you. I can’t believe I’m your daddy, baby girl. I may not be perfect and I’m sure I’m going to make about a gazillion mistakes, but I promise you I will do everything in my power to make sure you and your mommy have a happy life. We’ll watch so much hockey together and when you’re older I’ll teach you how to skate. God, I love you so much already.”
Watching him with her. How gentle he is…it brings a smile to my face and a joy to my heart. I can tell he really does love her.
“You know, she probably needs a name,” I finally murmur. His head snaps to me, surprised to see me awake.
“Heyyyy,” he coos. “Did I wake you? I’m sorry. We were just…” He looks down at our daughter and smiles. “We were just chatting.”
“No, you didn’t. Hospital beds aren’t the most comfortable thing in the world.”
“I can get you some extra pillows. Blankets? Are you cold?”
I shake my head, still a bit drowsy. “No. I’m okay. Thank you.”
He’s quiet for a minute before he speaks again. “How about Summer?”
“What about summer?”
“Her name. Summer.”
“It’s pretty. What made you think of that?”
He glances at the baby again, swiping a finger over her forehead and smiling down at her. “I don’t know. We met in the summer. Summer’s a relaxing time for me, for you too given your job. Summer is usually a happy time for a lot of people.”
“I like it,” I tell him. “Summer Grace? Grace is my middle name. I was kind of hoping it could be her middle name too.”
“Yeah.” He nods. “Summer Grace Lowe.” I like it.
“No, silly. She would be Summer Grace Foster.”
His smile falters. “It would?”
“Is that not okay? You’re her father after all. Kids usually take their paternal surnames.”
“You…you want her to be a Foster?”
I tilt my head against my pillow. “Of course. You’re her dad, Dex.”
He whispers her name. “Summer Grace Foster…yeah. I think I love it. It’s perfect.” He turns to me. “Can she still be my little tater tot?”
His nickname makes me chuckle. “Of course. Always.”
He lifts Summer in his arms and brings his lips to her forehead. “You are the most perfect child that has ever been created and I am so fucking proud to be your daddy.”
“Have you been holding her and talking to her this whole time?”
“Hell yeah. You need to sleep way more than I do. This is the least I can do.”
“You know there’s a basinet in here for a reason, right? You can put her in there and get some sleep yourself.”
“Not a fucking chance. I’m not leaving her in that plastic box when I can keep her right here next to me. She’s safe and warm, right here.” He turns and rises from the couch with Summer still in his arms. “I mean, unless you want to hold her.”
“I do, but…” I yawn. “I don’t want anything to happen to her if I fall back asleep and that seems very likely as my eyes are already feeling heavy again.”
Dex leans down so I can kiss our baby and then he kisses the top of my head. I close my eyes and linger in the feel of his lips on me. The warmth of him. Knowing I’m safe and cared for when he’s here.
I’m so glad he’s here.
“Dex?”
“Yeah, babe?”
I feel myself start to drift back to sleep. “Thank you for doing this with me. For not leaving me alone.”
“Tatum, there is nowhere else I would rather be. I promise I’m not going anywhere. Sleep now.” He kisses me one last time. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”
___
“Dude, it’s so my turn. Hand her over.”
“No fair, you’ve already gotten to hold her twice.”
“Fuck you, asshat. She’s basically my niece.”
“Yeah, well she is my niece, dumbass. And don’t say fuck in front of the baby. She has ears.”
“Yeah, Hawken. Don’t say fuck. She’s just a baby.”
Suddenly all of the guys and Rory breathe in at the same time, their faces frowning.
“Oh, damn,” Quinton says. “What’s that smell?”
Quinton waves his hand in front of his face. “Woof. That’s worse than a day-old gym bag.”
Milo nods. “That’s worse than all our socks after not washing them throughout playoffs.”
“That smells like a shit took a shit,” Hawken says. “And then mixed it with someone else’s shit.”
Rory cocks her head. “How do you even know what that would smell like?”
“Excuse me, you bunch of pussies,” Zeke takes Summer from Hawken and cradles her in his big sturdy arms. “But I believe that is the smell of a perfectly ripe newborn baby shit.”
“Hey, watch who you’re callin’ a pussy,” Dex narrows his eyes as he takes Summer from Zeke and then gestures to me. “My girl’s pussy performed more magic than I have ever fucking seen when she birthed this perfect little gem.” He kisses Summer’s nose. “She is one bad ass woman. Ain’t nothin’ weak about a pussy.”
“Thank you for telling everyone in the room about my vagina, Dex. I’m sure it’s exactly what they wanted to hear.”
In all honesty, Dex’s compliment almost makes me swoon. Well, that and he refers to me as his girl.
Am I really his girl?
Does he see me that way?
As Dex places Summer in her bassinet to change her diaper, the guys continue their friendly argument.
“You guys, you know I already hold the favorite uncle title, right?”
The guys all stare at Milo. Quinton rolls his eyes.
“Says who?”
“Says my sister. Her kids adore me. I have experience.”
Colby laughs. “Her kids put makeup on you and do your nails like a pretty little girl. We’ve all seen the pictures.”
“And duh, that’s why I’m the favorite uncle. You just wait. One day this little princess right here is going to ask to paint your nails and not one of you is going to say no.”
“Damn right,” Dex tells them. “First one of you to say no to my kid gets a punch to the nuts. No cup allowed.”
I snicker. “Dex!”
“What?” He shrugs. “Just doin’ my fatherly duties. If my kid says jump, they better ask how high. If my baby says she wants a pony, these guys better be buying her a fuckin’ Clydesdale.”
Colby finally steps up and takes Summer into his arms once she has a fresh diaper. “Summer Grace, if you ask Uncle Colby for a pony, I’ll buy you the whole horse farm. How does that sound?”
Milo rolls his eyes. “Overachiever.”
___
After a couple days of family visits, the introduction between my parents and Dex—they loved him by the way —and visits from the team as well as teacher friends from work, Summer and I were finally being discharged to go home. My mom is staying with me this week to help out with the baby and as grateful as I am for her love and support, I’m nervous about how this is going to work where Dex is concerned.
Dex and I didn’t talk about this ahead of time. Perhaps that’s my fault. I made all these plans before he showed up in my life but I certainly don’t want to push him away. He has as much of a right to Summer as I do, and he wants to be a dad. He wants the midnight feedings and the diaper changes. He wants the bath and bedtime routine. According to him he wants it all.
I only wish I knew, for sure, what all means.
Does all include me?
Us?
Will we be a family?
Does he want that?
Do I want that?
He’s a very high-profile athlete with a rigorous schedule on and off the ice. I know that’s where his focus needs to be and I wouldn’t blame him for wanting his private time, what little of it he gets.
“Welcome home!” My mom stands just inside my apartment as Dex carries Summer in her car carrier and our duffle bags through the door. “There’s my little angel,” she coos. “How was the ride?”
I chuckle behind Dex. “I don’t think he’s ever driven so slowly in my life.”
Dex places Summer down on the table and turns. “Can’t trust those crazy drivers out there, you know? Besides, the roads could’ve been icy and I’m not taking any chances.”
“Well, thank you for getting my girls home in one piece,” Mom says, already unhooking and lifting Summer from her seat.
“Yes, thank you, Dex.”
“Of course. Don’t mention it.”
“God, I could use a shower.”
Dex eyes me seriously. “Do you need some help? Even just an arm to steady you? Someone to wash your hair?”
Why is he so sweet and swoony?
“I think I can manage. I just want to wash off the hospital ick and get out of these sexy hospital panties.”
“I packed that squirt bottle thing for you. It’s in your toiletry bag. The nurse said…well, you know. It would come in handy.”
“My super cooch-soaker three thousand?” I wink at Dex who chuckles when I use his name for the all-mighty peri bottle from my hospital bathroom.
“Yeah, that.”
“Thank you. It’ll come in very handy for the next few days or weeks or…however long this mess takes to go away.”
He fidgets a little as Mom makes silly faces at Summer in that way all grandparents do.
“Alright, umm, well, why don’t I run out and get us all some dinner? It’ll be good for you to eat some real food.”
“That sounds fabulous. I’m starving.”
“I’ll get anything you want. Name it.”
“Oh, umm, Ooooh!” My eyes grow. “What about mac and cheese from Freda’s Diner? And maybe a few salads? Oh, and their meatballs. Oh, my God I feel like I could eat a ton of those right now.”
“Freda’s it is.” He leans over and kisses my temple. “Relax in the shower and I’ll take care of dinner while your mom has some baby time. Text me if you need anything else, okay?”
“Thank you, Dex.”
“See you soon.”