You Said I Was Your Favorite (A Lancaster Prep Novel)

A week later and I’m in the dining hall by myself, contemplating where I’m going to sit. Arch isn’t here. He went to a leadership conference with the student council in New York City for two days and I miss him terribly. He says he misses me too and texts when he can, but it’s not the same without him actually being here.

I miss him so much it’s like a part of me is lost and I’ll only be complete when Arch is back on campus with me.

Dramatic but true.

Schoolwork is keeping me busy though. My class load hasn’t let up whatsoever and I’m working as hard as I can to maintain my number one status.

Still can’t believe I surpassed Arch. Things could still change once the semester is over, but I’m feeling pretty good. Even if I’m number one for only a short time, at least I did beat him at one point during our senior year.

It feels good, being on top. Feels even better when he’s being so supportive.

He surprises me every day with the way he shows his support for me. How sweet he is. How thoughtful. Walking together in between classes while he tells me some entertaining story, greeting everyone as they pass by us. We always sit together at lunch, his chair beside mine, his claim on me clear.

Probably a tad archaic but I don’t mind. I like being claimed by Arch Lancaster.

We work together on our homework in the library after school lately, but it’s hard to concentrate when he sits so close, his leg pressed next to mine, his warmth seeping into me. That knowing look on his face just before he leans in to kiss me. Distract me…

Ugh. I miss him.

After I make myself a salad, I go in search of Edie, but can’t find her anywhere. Instead, I head for my old table for two, wishing I’d brought a book with me to keep me occupied. I’m about to pass by the table where Arch and his friends usually sit when I lock eyes with Cadence who is of course, already sitting there.

“Hey, Daisy! You should sit with us.” Her smile is sickly sweet, the gleam in her eyes not so much.

I hesitate, my gaze going to Mya, who keeps her head down, her gaze on the table. “Um, thank you, but no.”

Why am I bothering being polite toward Cadence? She’s a snake. I should avoid her at all costs.

“Oh please. You can’t say no.” Cadence kicks the chair closest to me out so fast I have to jump out of the way before it nails me in the knees. “Join us.”

My heart in my throat, I set my tray on the table before I sit down, scooting the chair close, leaving my backpack at my feet. I’m so nervous, my hands are shaking and I grip them together in my lap, trying to calm down.

I don’t want to show them just how freaked out I am. They’ll latch onto any sort of weakness I might show, and knowing Cadence, she’ll never let it go either.

“Where’s Arch?” Cadence asks me, her tone overly-friendly.

“He’s at that leadership conference,” Mya interjects, answering for me. “So is JJ.”

It’s hard for me to wrap my head around JJ being on the student council with Arch, but it’s true.

Cadence sends her a dirty look before turning her attention back to me. “I suppose Mya answered that question correctly since she’s currently fucking JJ.”

I blink at her, shocked she would say something so crude about her friend and JJ. “They’re coming back tomorrow.”

God, why did I bother telling her that? Though I’m sure she already knows thanks to Mya.

“Aren’t you worried he might meet someone new while he’s gone?” Cadence’s brows shoot up and I say nothing. I’ve realized over the years that sometimes it’s best to remain quiet. People can’t use your words against you that way. “I suppose you two could be fucking, but I don’t know. You seem more like the prudish type to me. There’s got to be someone better out there for him, don’t you think? There are hundreds of girls at that conference right now who are all probably gorgeous and smart. What if one of them—or more—caught his attention?”

My flinch at her words can’t be helped and she spots it, the knowing look on her face giving me serious evil vibes. “I don’t see how that’s any of your business,” I murmur.

“What? Him finding someone else? Or the fucking part? I mean…okay. Everyone knows you two are…together.” She wrinkles her nose in seeming disgust. “So we can all assume he’s fucking you. Or is he? I’m guessing you’re probably saving herself for marriage. Am I right?”

Cadence giggles but Mya doesn’t. Neither do I.

“You’re just jealous because we’re together and he’s not yours anymore,” I tell her, not holding back.

I’m tired of being quiet, especially with Cadence.

The incredulous look on Cadence’s face switches to her bursting into shocked laughter, her elbow shooting out, nudging into Mya’s side. “Please. Jealous of you? Give me a break.”

“Is that so surprising? That he’d rather be with me than you?”

“Of course, it is. I mean, look at you.” Cadence turns to Mya. “Look at her, right?”

“Stop, Cadence,” Mya says with a sigh, averting her head. She seems fed up, and I can’t blame her. “You’re being mean.”

“She’s being mean too.” Cadence waves a hand at me.

“No, I’m not,” I snap.

Cadence narrows her eyes as she studies me. “Look at Little Miss Virgin, speaking up for herself for once in her life. I’m surprised.”

“How do you know I’m a virgin?” I challenge. I mean, technically I am, though Arch and I have done…a lot. We’ve just never done that.

“Come on, Daisy. You dress like a nun and no boy has ever noticed you the entire time you’ve gone here. I swear you’re just some sort of—novelty to Arch.” Cadence shakes her head, her lip curled in disgust. “I don’t get it.”

“Maybe Arch likes me for me and not because I just spread my legs for him on command like you did,” I retort, not even knowing if that’s true.

My words sober Cadence right up, her face turning red. “He doesn’t actually like you.”

“How do you know? You don’t even talk to him,” I point out. “Not anymore.”

He can’t stand her. He’s implied that much to me. Not that we sit around and talk about her, though I’m sure she wishes we did.

“I do too. He came to my party,” Cadence retorts.

“What party?”

Cadence shares another look with Mya, who I notice remains eerily quiet. “We got a house in town and partied all weekend. He was there with us.”

I frown. He was with me last Friday night, but I don’t know about Saturday…

He told me he went into the city with Edie. They had to spend the weekend with their parents.

“We spent the night together.” Cadence’s smile is small, her eyes dancing. I’m sure she sees the uncertainty in my gaze and she is so enjoying this moment. “I’m used to him not being fully committed, but I don’t know how you feel about that. I wanted to be a girl’s girl and let you know.”

A girl’s girl. I know I don’t have a lot of friends and would probably never be described as a girl’s girl, but Cadence has a lot of nerve, dropping a bomb like that and trying to make it seem like she’s just being a friend.

Please. More like she’s my mortal enemy.

“I appreciate you telling me,” I say, my voice flat.

“Anytime!” Her enthusiastic response almost has me rolling my eyes. “Us girls have to stick together, especially when it comes to Arch Lancaster, am I right? He’s a total player. Good thing he has such a huge dick though. Makes up for all the shit he puts us through.”

I cannot believe she’s saying these kinds of things to me. And the expression of absolute misery on Mya’s face tells me she’s suffering too.

“I need to go.” I leap to my feet and grab my tray, my appetite long gone and I didn’t even take a single bite of my salad. “See you later.”

I flee before they can say anything to try and stop me and I don’t bother looking back, dumping my salad and setting my tray on top of the trashcan. From the sound of Cadence’s tinkling laughter chasing after me as I exit the dining hall, I’m guessing she’s feeling zero remorse over what she just said to me.

God, what a bitch.

I end up in the bathroom that’s in the same building where my math class is, sitting in a stall but not using it, trying to keep it together. This is why I don’t try to make friends. Allowing yourself to become close to someone is like opening a door to trouble. They’ll end up disappointing you no matter what. Hurting you.

Abandoning you.

I feel abandoned right now, thanks to Arch being away, though I can’t blame him for that. I have to deal with my own insecurities and get over them. Cadence is trying to get under my skin and it worked.

Now I’m full of doubt, and I hate it.

My temples throb with an impending headache and I take deep, almost gulping breaths, trying to calm my too quickly beating heart. Stupid Cadence and her rude comments. Talking about Arch’s dick size and how she was with him recently. Is it true? Or is it a lie?

Everything she said is swimming in my head, her words and the visuals they conjured up turning into a muddy swamp of confusion.

No. It can’t be true. He would never do that.

I can’t let her get to me. That means she wins and I refuse to let that bitch win.

Ever.

The bell rings and I hurriedly exit out of the stall, stopping short when I see Mya standing just outside the bathroom, her expression full of sympathy.

“I thought you were in there,” she starts but I keep walking.

I don’t need to hear what she has to say. No false apologies or whatever it is she wants to offer me. Cadence is her best friend. In my eyes, they’re together. A united front. What Cadence says, Mya believes.

She is not a friend. She’s an enemy too.

“Daisy, come on. Let me explain,” Mya pleads, and I only stop when I’m outside, whirling on her as multiple people walk past us.

“Explain what? That you hate me? That you think I’m stupid for spending time with Arch because he’s still with Cadence or whatever? Don’t worry, she said everything I needed to hear,” I throw at her.

I’m about to leave, but Mya grabs my arm, stopping me, her gaze imploring. “You’re not stupid. And I don’t hate you. Cadence isn’t with Arch. They haven’t seen each other since he started hanging around you.”

I gape at her, shocked she’d rat out her supposed best friend. “It doesn’t matter.”

“It does. Well, I’m guessing it matters to you.” A sigh leaves Mya and she releases her hold on me, taking a step back, but I don’t leave. Now I’m curious. “You were right. She’s just jealous, Daisy. She had plans for her senior year and Arch smashed them all by ending things with her.”

“What sort of plans?” I ask, unsure of what Mya’s implying.

“She believed that she and Arch would rule the school.” Mya rolls her eyes with a self-deprecating laugh. “I know it sounds silly, but she’s the most popular girl and he’s the most popular guy and they were a total power couple our junior year, remember? She believed they’d be a power couple senior year too.”

“But he broke up with her on the first day of school,” I point out. “We all witnessed it in the auditorium.”

“That wasn’t the first time he’d done that to her. She always believed she could win him back. Until you came along.” Mya sounds vaguely surprised. Or impressed. I can’t quite tell. “He hasn’t tried to reach out to Cadence again.”

“Really?” I hate how small my voice is. How hopeful I sound. I believe what Mya said. I do. Because I don’t believe Cadence.

I hate that her words still filled me with doubt, even for a minute.

Mya nods. “Really. I just wanted you to know.”

She’s about to leave when my words stop her.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

“Why are you still friends with her?”

Mya shrugs, staring off into the distance for a moment before she says, “I can’t stand the thought of being alone.”

I watch her walk away, her words repeating in my brain. Making me realize that at some point, all of us feel a little lonely. Like Mya. Even Cadence.

Some of us are just better at dealing with it.