To My Shattered Soul

In the open wind, I suffocate,

Being captive behind the open gate.

Searching for answers, what and why

As I fly high in the clouded sky.

My skin burns under the blind fog inside,

I crumbled rolling in the big tide.

I didn’t know the reason or matter,

Why my soul broke down why did it shatter.

As a matter of fact, I knew now what was the reason.

And I was crumbling into dust inside just like that, but we ignored it, thinking it might be because of some weather or food problem. But when it happened thrice?

That's when we decided to take an action.

My Mom says If something happens the first and second time maybe it is coincident but the third time? It is not! And you need to do something about it.

So We ran through many tests, but there was nothing, all reports cleared, my throat seemed clear as if nothing happened to me at all.

Bonding between Jill and me turned even stronger, even when she over drank I suffered a hangover, and this was getting out of control.

I was turning pale day by day and my body skinnier… weaker!

I would just move a finger and a cracking sound could be heard across the room, my hair started falling, every time I comb them a handful of hair would come out as easily as if they are just sticking with a glue on my scalp.

Peter was watching me slipping away from life, he couldn’t see me like that, so I smiled for him, to make him feel I am still fighting, when I actually gave up inside.

As I looked in the mirror I saw nothing but a nearly dead skeleton figure covered with thin skin, and fewer hair over her head.

“I want you to take care of my office!” I requested Peter as I held his hands in mine.

He yanked back and turned his face away “It is your office! You take care of it! It isn’t my job!” He wanted to motivate me but when he turned back he had tears in his eyes.

“Daisy listen to me” He sat under my feet and took his hand inside his pocket.

“No! Peter…” I nodded slowly as I knew what he was about to do.

“I bought it with my own money! The money I earned with hard work!” He took out a ring from his pocket.

I kept nodding “Please” he insisted with tears rolling down his cheeks “I know I am not worth you! But give me a chance…. I will love you more than anything in this world!

I will be your crutches! I will be everything for you!” He begged as his fingers tangled together, pleaded then he rested his head on my lap.

I gently ran my fingers in his hair and when he sobbed for a few minutes I gathered strength and spoke in my shaking voice “So are you going to put that ring on my finger or not?” I swallowed a lump of tears in my throat.

He turned his face up to me and kissed me on my forehead “Thank you!” He hugged me and we both cried, that was a flood of too many feelings at the same time that we both were dealing with.

“But I have a condition” I held his face in my hands “If we are getting married, we will marry next Sunday,” I said, and Peter looked at me with pain in his eye, he knew why I am asking to marry him in such short notice.

“Hey! Where’s that power smile?” I wiped his tears and even though it killed him a thousand times but he smiled, just for me.

I heard him sobbing at night in the living room, I watched them all cry, every night, Mom… Dad and Peter.

They all used to sit together when they thought I was sleeping. They were mourning me each night, I wasn't dead yet but still they were mourning me, that was a hell of a week, a week I’d never forget.

And I wasn’t the only one who went through this, but Jill also suffered only the 10% of my pain even that squeezed most of the life from her body.

Next Thursday Jill rushed to the bathroom when she felt nausea, and when she threw out it was blood just like I had.

She felt so weak she fell down, she stumbled on her way out of the bathroom, Jordan got to her and helped her stand up, he saw what happened to her and that made him worried but instead of staying by her side, he left even earlier that day.

That was alarming for her so when Jill gave a visit to Jordan’s office in the evening, she knew something was wrong but her doubts turned into confidence when she came face to face with Jordan’s boss, and according to him he leaves every day at evening, including every Thursday.

She had a pie in her hands that she baked for him, instead, she gave it to the boss and left.

In her way a man held her arm, when she turned around it was a man of Jordan’s age, tall and slim, he pointed toward his mouth and shook his thumb as to tell that he can’t speak.

He waved his fingers to call her, and he lead her all the way to the parking.

He placed a finger on his lips to tell her to be quiet, when they reached the lower parking area they heard a sound of a crowd speaking altogether.

There was a walkway that led to a small area going from left to right there were 4 pillars and when she peeked down there was a big dark hallway.

A circle made of salt in the middle with a star in the center and people standing around it, mostly youngsters and a man in the middle whose face couldn’t be seen because he was facing the other side.

They were gabbling altogether “We are the worshipers of night, may the darkness of night fill inside our bodies, and our souls, to us and to our young ones!” Both Jill and the man with her kept peeking while safely hidden under shadows.

“I sacrificed my mother Brittany Zyang! For my husband Shi Bang’s well-being, he was fighting with cancer and now he’s cured and now to get accepted in the clan of the night I offer my sister Fang Zyang.” A woman said, and then they heard someone crying, the woman who said that walked to the corner and from under those shadows she pulled out her sister, who was barely 16.

Her hands were tied to the back and her mouth was tied with a cloth. She was crying when they pushed her into the middle of that circle and a man who was standing in the middle placed a knife on her throat.

Jill extended her hand and was about to scream but the man with her pulled her back and covered her mouth with his hand, they both sat down and turned their faces the other way, and what they heard was just a pain full scream and then a slicing sound.