The Wolf Of Penshaw Lake

We had been in Penshaw Lake for four days. But it didn’t feel that way. It almost felt as though we had been there for five minutes and yet, as though we had been there for longer too. Mum was coming out of her shell, judging by the off-key song she was currently singing in the shower and the pep to her step that I hadn’t seen in a long time. She hadn’t stopped smiling since our dinner with Jane and her family, despite the hiccup with Mason. In fact, she had barely mentioned him. I stared at the plain, white door leading to the bathroom as I heard the water be switched off and her singing stop. It seemed as though she had finally made a friend after years of not being allowed.

It was sweet, and for the first time in a long time, I felt hope flutter deep down inside that we could somehow make a real,normal, living here. Mum pottered out of the bathroom moments later, humming to herself as she wrapped the towel tighter around her chest.

“You had better change, you don’t want to be late,” she ushered as she tutted at me sat absentmindedly on the bed.

I nodded, slowly getting to my feet. On the way home from Jane’s last night, we had seen some posters advertising a summer market fete, held in the grounds of Penshaw Lake Primary School. We had both decided that it would be really intriguing to explore; especially considering mum loved antiques. Checking to see that mum was clothed, I swept open the curtains to judge the weather outside. I swung open the window and felt the crisp, cool air of a sunny, May morning. The sky was blue, dotted with white, fluffy clouds and I took a moment to breathe in the fresh air, so different from the smelly, stuffy air of our home town. It wasn’t unusual to inhale the grease from a nearby kebab shop either. However, here, I could faintly smell lawn clippings and a real, homemade breakfast from a house down the street.

It was like we had moved into some kind of TV suburbia.

I could feel the warm sun begin to heat my skin and satisfied that I could wear shorts, I dug out a pair of black, jean shorts from my case. I paired them with a pink t-shirt, teased my hair into a loose french braid and placed my worn trainers back onto my feet. I looked down at them with a sigh, I would really need to buy some new ones.

But cash was running low.

“If we’re going to stay, what are we going to do about jobs?” I asked nonchalantly, swiping some nude lipstick across my lips.

Mum shrugged as she finished styling her neat, brown pixie cut. She turned to me with her hands on her hips, “It has not been seven days yet,” She tutted. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, I have still not decided if we should stay.”

I huffed. Penshaw Lake was calling to me like no other town ever had. I loved its beauty, its peculiarity, even the people like Josie and Dee I knew I would find myself missing if we had to move on.

‘Three more days’I thought, as I pushed open the hotel room door ready to leave.‘I just have to convince her in three days.’

The hotel room door slammed shut noisily as mum came out behind me. I winced at the bang and furrowed my eyebrows at mum who simply shrugged and walked ahead of me.

“People are still asleep!” I chastised her as we made our way down the staircase.

“What? At ten am?” She shrilled. “Don’t be silly.”

“Normal people like to lie in on a Saturday. Just because we were forced to be up by Dan at the crack of dawn, doesn’t mean that everyone also gets up at that time.”

I watched as mum’s shoulders stiffened as she heard his name. She went quiet for a moment as she stopped in her tracks, before continuing on down the stairs as though she had decided simply not to acknowledge him.

‘Good’I thought. The less we ever have to think about him again, the better.

We left the hotel and the warm sun immediately hit my bare skin, following by a crisp breeze that gave me goosebumps. I rubbed my arms and began walking in the direction of the school. It was a short walk, to the left of Blossoms’ cafe and down a long residential street. As we neared the school, I could hear children’s laughter echo across the field and the loud murmurs of adults conversing with each other.

A lady immediately grasped our attention as we entered the wide-open gates onto what would normally be the school car park. The lady was in her mid fifties, wearing a long patterned skirt and a bandana that matched. She smiled warmly at us, handing us both a raffle ticket.

“You must be the visitors staying at the old hotel up by the forest?” She queried, even though she clearly knew the answer.

“Wow, we must be the talk of the town,” Mum replied, although I couldn’t quite sense the tone of her voice.

The lady gave her a nervous smile, “Well not really,” She rushed, “But Jane spoke quite highly of you and I know you met my son, Isaac.”

She looked at me when she said his name and I smiled at her, “Yeah, I know Isaac.”

“I’m Julia. I live next door to Jane. You know if you ever get tired of that old hotel, I co-own a little B&B with Jane. It has some real homely character and it’s a little lonely, I hardly ever get people staying there. I mostly used to let the boys use it as a hangout when they were teens.”

“We’ll let you know if we decide to stay Julia,” Mum thanked her for the offer and turned to have a look across the field at the many stalls on offer. Julia seemed notice mum’s discomfort as she gestured for us to go and explore.

“Thank you,” I smiled warmly at her and she gave a smile in return, but there was a twinkle in her eye that told me she knew something I didn’t. It was the same look that Jane had in hers when she told me not to judge Mason. I wonder if she and Julia had talked about his outburst at dinner last night?

We walked across the field, taking in each and every stall. I made an effort to stop and look at the wares for sale on each one. Homemade cakes, homemade soaps, old knick-knacks, a couple of charity tents and more dotted around the field. It seemed as though the whole of Penshaw Lake had turned up to either buy, sell or browse what was on offer. I stopped at a small tent selling cakes and chocolates.

“What would you like?” Asked a little girl, lisping through the gap where her two front teeth should be.

“I’ll have a brownie, please,” I humored, although I wasn’t too hungry.

“50p please.”

I paid her a pound and told her to keep the change. She turned and beamed at her mum who thanked me. I placed the wrapped brownie in my bag to save for later, I wasn’t the kind of girl who could eat chocolate every day, especially not in the morning. I was more of a savory kind of person.

Frowning, I looked around for mum but couldn’t see her. However, I wasn’t worried, instead I assumed she would have found something of interest and gone to gossip and gab with whomever she could entice. As I walked further, I came across a tent selling some used books.

“Hi,” Called out a male voice and I turned to see a young, attractive man stood behind a table with his arms folded.

“Hi,” I replied, stepping towards his tent curiously.

“You look like a girl who reads,” he said with a grin, gesturing to the books on the table, spreading his arms out wide.

“Oh I don’t know,” I grinned, taking a look at the classics he had on offer.

Fitzgerald. Shakespeare. Austen. Bronte. All the literary classics that every child on the field would not take two glances at. I wasn’t much of a reader myself, but I could appreciate a book as wonderfully written as some of the greats. Even if they were a romantic fantasy.

Life just wasn’t a romance novel.

“I bet you’ve never read this,” he remarked, holding out a dog-eared copy ofJane Eyre.

I took a look at his knowing grin and I wished with all my might that I had read it, but I hadn’t.

I rolled my eyes, “No,” I muttered.

“Take it,” He offered, passing it to me.

“No I couldn’t,” I hesitated.

“Take it. Actually wait,” He withdrew the book from my outstretched palm and turned around. “Okay, now take it.”

I frowned and flicked through the pages, writing on the back of the front cover caught my eye and I pulled it open. There, written on the page was his number.

I blushed. I had never received a man’s phone number before and I was ashamed at how girly and embarrassed it made me feel.

I looked up, trying not to let my cheeks flame with heat. His hand was outstretched, for me to take. I shook it, warily.

“I’m Jack,” he disclosed.

“He-Sophie,” I replied, internally screaming ′fuck′ at how quickly I almost gave him my real name.

“Sophie there you are!” Came a sudden familiar voice.

I could have died. Not only was I a dithering mess in front of Jack, but now my mum had shown up.

“Hey mum,” I drawled. “This is Jack,” I introduced.

“Hey!” He said pleasantly, “I’m a teacher here at the school. I was just getting to know Sophie.”

“Yes well I think you’ve exchanged enough pleasantries now haven’t you? Come on, Soph.”

I looked at her incredulously, I knew she despised men, but Jack had been the perfect gentleman. I let her drag me away a little before I dug my heels in, not literally, and glared at her.

“Mum, that was humiliating! You dragged me away like some kid, do I have to remind you again that I am twenty one and perfectly capable of making my own decisions?”

“He was flirting with you and staring at you like a lost puppy. I thought we agreed that dating was off the cards,” she hissed.

“Maybe for you, but I think I’m starting to change my mind,” I spat back.

“Oh yeah? What happens he starts drinking? When he starts pushing you around? When you tell him no but he does it anyway? What happens,Heidi, when you’re stuck with abuse for ten years and you can’t escape because he controls you? Dan controlled both of us, you don’t think a man wouldn’t be able to easily manipulate you?”

I closed my eyes and dropped my head, a small, hot tear escaping through the frustration, anger and sadness I was feeling at that moment. I was torn between feeling as though she was right, and feeling as though I had to take a risk anyway. Dan was one man. Surely, I deserved a chance for real happiness?

Mum stalked off, leaving me to collect my emotions in the middle of the crowded field. I suddenly felt alone, despite the consistent noise all around me.

“Here.”

I looked up to see Jack, holding out the copy ofJane Eyre. I smiled and took it, holding it to my chest.

“Even if you don’t call the number, I’d still like you to have the book.”

“Thank you Jack,” I accepted graciously.

Watching Jack leave back to his tent, I caught the eye of one very handsome, mysterious Mason who was stood leaning against a post with his arms folded, staring directly at me. He looked pissed, although I can’t begin to fathom why. As he catches me looking back at him, he stands up from the post and walks away towards the car park. Deep down, through the initial fear that Mason brought out in me, there was something about him that intrigued me. Whether it be an animalistic, horny desire, or something else that I couldn’t quite understand, but I knew for sure that Jack didn’t invoke the same feelings inside me that Mason did.

Which was why I was so unsure about what to do about the phone number I currently had cradled to my chest.