SWNOVELS Chapter 185
185 Griffin
Griffin was right, I knew I was not coping well with all that had happened to me. It
has been too much, but I just needed to go on. Or I thought I had to, but today
showed me I needed to take more breaks. Take better care of myself and
unfortunately, it meant I needed to go to therapy again. It's not like I mind
therapy, it is just so time-consuming, Not just the sessions but everything but the
aftermath too.
I needed to do better though, for myself, for Griffin, and for our pup. Whether I
am pregnant or not. Because if not now then I will be soon. And I want my pup to
have a stable, happy mother. No longer held back by issues from the past.
“No, you're right baby, I will set up an appointment tomorrow so I can get back to
regular therapy,” I tell Griff, and I mean it.
But not I just want to eat the delicious meal Griffin made me and then go to bed
and sleep. I feel so emotionally drained right now. And it's making me feel tired.
ox
The next morning when I woke up I felt nauseous, Griffin is getting all excited.
Thinking it is a sign that I really am pregnant. I feel it might be because I am so
nervous about setting up the therapy appointment. As much as I know I need to
go, as much as I was genuine with Griffin yesterday. It is still daunting,
But it is nice to see that if I get morning sickness Griffin will be as sweet and
caring as l/expected him to be. And I am happy I still get to drink my morning
coffee in bed, without being sick. Today is the last calm day I have before my
education truly kicks off tomorrow. Even
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the weekends will not be completely free of training. Isabella did keep our desire
to spend the weekends together not working in her mind. She did make sure that
in the weekends much like yesterday and today— it's just some reading. Today
though I needed to figure out if Griffin and I would plead Lizzy and her family’s
case to Rodrick and Isabelle, if they agreed. Which they most likely will, we need
to introduce them to the rest of the pack so it could be put to a vote.
Yesterday, I tried reading the parts Isabella told me to read. But my mind had
been elsewhere, after re-reading the same line until I fell asleep yesterday. I
decided not to try anymore and just go to bed. So not only do I have to look at
the situation with Lizzy. I needed to catch up on reading, and I needed to finally
find a Gemma. Krystel is going to be an amazing Beta, she already is even
before she officially is. Like Gerald and Dillion are to Griffin. We are both lucky to
have them because we wouldn't be able to get everything done without them.
That's one of the reasons why I need to find a Beta.
THEE
If been getting to know the pack members a lot better, still to appoint someone as
your Gemma you either need to be really close to them. This isn’t possible for me
yet, not with only knowing the pack members for a few months and only being a
pack member officially for a few days. The other option was to bring your own
Beta from your old pack. Not only did I not grow up in the White Oak pack, the
pack that was my old pack when I became a Silver Moon pack member. I wanted
my Beta and Gemma to be part of the Silver Moon pack when I chose them. Not
after I did so, I wanted to show I was so much a part of the pack that I did not
need to get my assistants from another pack. The only exception would have
been Jessa, but she was never an option. Leaving me with only one last option,
having interviews to see who wants to be my Gemma. And then pick the one I
had the most click with or the most trust/in to be my Gemma.
ok
“Princess Ayla, there are five more candidates,” Krystel told me, it still felt weird
to hear her address me by my formal title. She had too with so many wolves
overhearing our conversation.
When it is just the two of us, even when it is work-related she calls me Ayla.
That's something I hope to achieve with my Gemma too. I want them to not just
be my assistant. I want to become friends too. All the Beta's and Gemma'’s I have
ever seen were friends of their Alpha or Luna. To me, that makes perfect sense,
after all, you need to blindly trust your Beta and Gemma.
“Sent the next one in Krystel,” I told my sister-in-law.
So far all the candidates had been she-wolves, I suspected they would be. Even
if I had made it clear anyone regardless of anger and gender could apply for the
job. Sure, someone around my own age, around Griffin and the others would
make the most sense. But I was not going to exclude anyone before ever talking
to them.
Not only was every applicant so far a she-wolf, they were all about the same age
as I was. I was okay with that, even without excluding them I had some doubts if
a person much older would fit in with the rest of us. That wouldn't matter too
much in regard to work. It would make becoming friends and doing things in a
group a lot harder. I figured the same would go for someone who was much
younger than us.
But when Dean, a nineteen-year-old wolf I had spoken with a handful of times,
walked into my office something immediately felt right.
“Tell me Dean, why do you want to be my Gemma?’ I asked the first question I
had asked everyone. It was the only question I had written down, that first
question was supposed to start a conversation, If someone couldn't just carefree
chat with me if there was a job to be done. Even if the job was doing a job
interview then it would not be a good fit.
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Dean straightened his back like he was more than ready to give me an answer.
He didn’t have the chance to answer me though. Suddenly there was a lot of
commotion in the hallway, followed by the door slamming open. I turned to the
door opening to find Cynthia standing there. Arms crossed, eyes dark, she
reminded me of Hannah and it scared me more than it should.
“How dare you hold Gemma interviews when you will never be the Luna of this
pack.” She shouted at me, just as Krystel came skidding to a halt. Apologizing
that she just went to get a bottle of water from her office.
She tried to pull Cynthia out of the room but the latter was too quick. I was
unsure of what to do, no matter how rude this was. It still wasn't something, going
against the pack rules. I could always ask the guards to escort her out of my
office. But I was scared how that would come across to the rest of the pack
members. I froze to the spot as Cynthia came storming up to me.
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