The Moral Dilemma (War of Sins Book 5)

THE FOLLOWING DAY, Noelle set out to visit Raf just as before, armed with a basin of warm water, towels, food and medicine. She couldn’t wait to see him again since their previous conversation had defined their relationship in her mind.

He was serious about her.

She blushed just thinking about his kisses and his words of commitment.

Although she didn’t know how people behaved while dating in normal circumstances, she was sure Rafaelo was one of a kind simply by virtue of his honesty and loyalty. He’d been very straightforward with her when he’d told her he didn’t make light of their filtration and wanted more—something concrete.

While she had no doubt that someone else would have taken advantage and fucked her on the spot, despite the debilitating injuries, her Raf had been so circumspect, so gentlemanly.

She had the urge to fan herself as she felt herself heat up as she replayed their conversation in her head.

Yet for all her good spirits when she headed to the basement where he’d been locked, she was shocked to find it empty.

“Lulu,” she called out as she hurried back to her apartment. “He’s gone. He’s not in the basement anymore,” she added, panic growing inside of her by the second.

Lucero was at her desk, embroidering a piece of material. Hearing Noelle’s cries of alarm, she looked up, frowning.

“What do you mean he’s gone?”

“He’s not in the basement. Where could he be? You don’t think Sergio…” Noelle trailed off, her fear turning into a full blown panic attack. “My God. He’ll kill him. I know he will. He probably found out I’ve been visiting him and now he…”

“Noelle, calm down,” Lucero said in her usual calming voice. “You won’t solve anything if you think of the worst.”

Rising from her chair, she moved toward Noelle, stroking her lightly on the back.

Noelle clutched at the necklace nestled against her skin, her breathing becoming more and more erratic.

“We’ll find him. I promise you,” Lucero whispered as she hugged her in an attempt to soothe her.

It took Noelle a few moments to get her bearings under control enough that she could think clearly again. She was still breathing hard, her heart racing, but at least she was calmer.

Once she realized she wouldn’t achieve anything if she panicked, she focused on ways of finding Raf. And the first thing she did was check the security footage.

“Here, I’ve made you some calming tea,” Lucero said as she placed a hot mug on the desk.

Noelle gave her a strained smile.

“What would I do without you, Lulu? Thank you.”

Lucero nodded, her lips tipped up.

They both settled in front of the monitors, combing through the footage.

“There,” Noelle pointed to a video timestamped early in the morning.

Rafaelo was being carried back to the slaves’ quarters and put into isolation.

“They must have let go of the others if they’re moving him,” Lucero noted.

“It doesn’t make sense, though. Something is just… odd.”

“You’re still thinking Sergio had something to do with it?”

“I don’t know, Lulu. Maybe I’m overreacting, but I know that the moment Sergio knows what he means to me is the moment his life is in danger. And I can’t afford that.”

“Then you need to be more careful. You can’t keep visiting him or people will notice.”

“I know,” Noelle sighed, pursing her lips. “I’ll only go check on him tonight. The last time, I promise,” she muttered, though she knew deep down it was all a lie.

How could she stay away from him after what had happened?

She fiddled with her necklace as she stared at the monitor, still wondering what she was going to do. The thought of letting him wither away alone in his cell terrified her, but at the same time she recognized the dangers involved.

When the night came and Noelle sneaked out of the house, she did so wearing Lucero’s clothes and a blonde wig resembling her friend’s hair. It was the only thing she’d come up with that could help her avoid detection.

As she arrived at the slaves’ location, she went in the direction of the isolation cells, which were removed from the living quarters.

The isolation facility consisted of a small building that resembled a few trailers merged together. Inside, there were four cells, one next to another. Each one of them had a metal door with a small window at the bottom that was used to deliver meals.

Although she didn’t have the key to the cells—only the chief guard did—Noelle was determined to get Raf some food and antibiotics, to ensure he wouldn’t get an infection from his unsanitary living conditions.

“Raf?” she called out softly.

Knowing the guards had wanted to separate him from the others for fear he might incite them to violence again, she was sure he would be the only one here. They would have never risked him colluding with other slaves and starting a revolt. Not with how they’d already witnessed the degree of his influence.

As she walked alongside the cells, she noted that all the doors were open except for one—his.

“Lucero?”

His voice was tentative and hoarse—so much so it broke her heart.

“I brought you some food,” she quickly said, removing the sandwiches she’d made for him from her bag and placing them at the window’s mouth. She added a bottle of water and a film of pills that had some instructions scribbled on the back.

“You shouldn’t have come here. It’s too dangerous,” he said gruffly.

She heard movement, and in no time he shuffled closer to the door to receive what she’d brought for him.

“You’re really my guardian angel—my light,” he murmured as his fingers brushed against hers. “Mi luz.”

Noelle squeezed his hand, guilt gnawing at her once more.

He thought he was talking with a native Spanish speaker—with Lucero. She’d kept the ruse because otherwise he would have recognized her accent and he would have been suspicious of her. Yet the more he fell for this manufactured version of her, the more she rued her decision.

Yet the alternative was much, much worse.

“I couldn’t stay away knowing they wouldn’t give you enough food. You need your strength to recover. How are your eyes?”

“Still swollen,” he sighed. “I can make out some blurry shapes, but it’s still bad.”

“I hope there wasn’t some internal damage…”

“I’ll be fine,” he quickly replied.

Was this for her benefit, or his? She wondered.

“Did they say how long you’re going to be in here for?”

“No. I doubt they’ll let me go soon though. Not when they seem to think I will disturb the peace.”

“But then…” she trailed off as she realized there couldn’t possibly be a positive outcome from this.

“I’m afraid so,” he replied, slumping against the wall of his tiny cell. “If they don’t find a way to use me, they will get rid of me.”

“I won’t let that happen,” she promised. “I’ll get you out of here, Raf. Somehow… Somehow I’ll help you get out.”

“I don’t want you to put yourself in any danger because of me. Please promise me you’ll be careful.”

“I promise,” she whispered. “I work with the mistress of the house and that allows me some protection.”

“But who will protect you from her?” he countered. “I’ve seen how she treats the slaves,” he added bitterly. “She probably thinks she’s above everyone, doesn’t she?”

Her first instinct was to defend herself and tell him that it was all a misunderstanding, but she couldn’t afford him finding out who she really was—more than anything, she couldn’t risk him seeking out or speaking with her in public. That would put all eyes on them.

“She’s the worst,” she uttered reluctantly.

I promise I’ll explain everything soon.

“She cares about no one but herself. Everyone hates her.”

At least the last part was true. It had to be, since she’d earned her respect with an iron fist.

“Does she hurt you, too?” he asked, and she heard the worry in his voice.

Noelle wondered how she should answer that question. She supposed the worse she made herself look, the more Raf would keep his distance if they ever crossed paths outside.

“Sometimes,” she murmured. “But it’s not bad, I swear. At least I’m protected from the creepy men around the hacienda. I’d willingly subject myself to her whims knowing at least no one will try to take advantage of me like that.”

“I’m so sorry, Lucero,” Raf said. “If I find a way to escape, you’re coming with me,” he stated unequivocally.

“Raf…”

“I won’t accept anything less. Either we both go, or not at all. I would never leave you in this den of vipers. I could never live with myself if that happened.”

“Alright,” she whispered, realizing it was a moot point to convince him of anything else at that point. “You need to eat now. I can’t imagine that what the guards gave you was enough for someone your size.”

“I’m eating, I’m eating,” he said, biting into a sandwich.

“You also need to take the pills, okay?”

“Of course. You can be quite bossy,” he chuckled.

Noelle blushed.

“I only want you to be well.”

“I know. I was joking, Lucero. I love that you’re so concerned about me…” He suddenly stopped as steps thudded outside of the isolation building.

Noelle’s eyes widened in fear.

She couldn’t be caught there. It would not only blow her cover with Raf, but it would also ruin everything.

“Hide,” Raf said in a hushed tone.

She was already to her feet and sneaking inside the other cell, closing the door and breathing in relief when it didn’t lock automatically. Carefully, she made her way into the back, taking advantage of the darkness of the room to hide behind the toilet in the corner.

It only took moments for someone to come into the building and question Raf about who he was speaking with.

“Can’t a man speak to himself? It gets rather lonely here,” Raf said with confidence.

For a split second, Noelle thought the guard would punish him for being so bold.

“Keep it down. Some people are trying to sleep,” he added groggily before dragging his feet out of the building.

Both Noelle and Raf breathed in relief when the door closed behind him.

“Can you hear me?” she asked in a whisper as she moved closer to the wall that separated them.

“Yes,” he whispered back. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. I just… I can’t believe you’re locked in such a room, Raf,” Noelle cried desolately as she looked around the tiny cell that didn’t even have a bed. There was only a toilet and a sink built into a wall. Aside from that, there was only darkness. So much darkness.

“At least I’ll have time to heal,” he replied tersely. “It’s better than breaking my back in the temple.”

“I guess you’re right. But I still…” she croaked, tears stabbing at her eyes.

She wanted so badly to be next to him, hug him to her chest and tell him that everything would be okay. More than anything, feeling the chill of the cell, she wanted to share the warmth of her body with him.

“I’m fine, Lucero,” he told her. “Please don’t worry on my account.”

She didn’t dare speak for he would hear the anguish in her voice.

I did this. I brought him here. It’s all my fault.

Her thoughts were clamoring, her guilt overwhelming her.

“Talk to me,” he whispered, his tone softer. “I love hearing your voice. It soothes me like nothing else.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“Have you ever been in love?” he suddenly asked, tension radiating from his voice.

“I told you I’ve never kissed someone before. What do you think?”

“You could have been in love without kissing someone,” he grumbled.

“No. I haven’t,” she confessed. “It wasn’t in the cards for someone like me.”

“Someone like you?” He frowned.

“Trapped,” she whispered, not elaborating more on the word. “Have you?” she countered.

“No,” he answered immediately. “I… I had a good friend, but I never met her in person. Maybe if we had met, we’d have developed something. But I’ve never felt anything like I feel when I’m with you, Lucero. Your presence alone brings me peace.”

Noelle would have been raging with jealousy if she didn’t know he was talking about her as curiouscat. Still, she didn’t know whether to be at least slightly jealous, or if she should be mad that he hadn’t fallen for her as curiouscat, as she had for him.

“No girlfriend? Fiancé?” She knew she was digging for information, but she hadn’t forgotten about that newspaper article she’d read about their nuptials that never came to pass. She’d been wrecked with jealousy for months.

“I wasn’t engaged once,” he sighed.

Noelle leaned forward, anger already radiating off her as her small hands formed into fists.

“It was an arranged marriage. Nothing else. But I… I don’t think I could have gone through it. It didn’t feel right.”

“What didn’t?” Noelle inquired.

“We were friends but nothing else. We became closer to please our families and she already had someone she was in love with. But even platonic… I just didn’t feel right saying those vows when I didn’t mean them—when I didn’t love her. So the answer to your question is a resolute no. I’ve never been in love.”

“Me neither.” She smiled.

Moving closer to the wall separating them, she plastered her hand against the cold concrete, imagining that he was doing the same in the other room. And as they continued to talk, about anything and everything, she, too, felt at peace.

Despite promising Lucero she wouldn’t take unnecessary risks and that she would only visit Raf once, Noelle continued to do so every night.

The moment the clock struck midnight, she would take advantage of the shift in guards and go keep him company, always bringing him supplies and making sure he was well-fed and taken care of. Then, she just kept him company for hours on end—until close to sunrise when the hacienda started to wake up.

Although she hesitated talking too much about herself, they found different topics to entertain themselves, often bursting into laughter at the jokes they made of their current situation.

They discussed politics and literature, mythology and history. Soon, they developed such a comfortable routine that it was as if she were curiouscat again and he were her Blue.

Yet things weren’t meant to last. Not when Raf’s fate was on shaky ground, and even the guards themselves didn’t know what to do with him.

The first week passed in a blur. As did the second and the third. His injuries healed, and he gained strength thanks to the food and medication Noelle brought each night.

But at the end of what would have been one month of Raf in isolation, everything changed.

Noelle, being called on an emergency outside of the country, had to cancel their nightly meetings. The last thing she wanted was for Sergio to suspect anything, so she had to behave as before.

But it wasn’t all in vain as the moment she was away from the hacienda, she made phone calls and inquiries into how she could help Raf escape.

Although her heart broke because she was far from him, she made breakthrough discoveries into how she could help him with the help of a few mercenaries.

Getting their information and promising she would keep in touch, she returned to the hacienda, excited to tell Raf about her plan.

But to her horror, she discovered his cell empty.

He’d been moved again.

And this time… She didn’t know how to help him.