The Love of the Wielder (The Wielders Book Two)

Nothing anyone had said about the matter was more impactful than Alec telling Maren how she’d changed since coming to the palace.

She truly had never thought of it that way, but she knew Alec was right. She was not at all the same as she was before the Selection. Before, she wouldn’t even go to a party at a neighboring estate for fear of discovery. But not that long ago she went to a ball at the palace and spent the whole night dancing and laughing with the man she loved and never once thought she might be discovered.

She thought some of it was just who she had become under the circumstances, but a lot of it was who she had become with Donovan. In the years since Karlyn died, she had forgotten that her powers were wonderful. Her parents preferred to pretend she didn’t have them, but Donovan, he saw that they were incredible. And seeing that he did made her appreciate them all over again.

She liked that version of herself so much more.

After Kieran attacked her and in the grief of leaving Donovan, she lost touch with that part of herself, the part that was proud of what she was, even if she had to be quiet about it.

Perhaps she had been deciding what to do about the baby based on who she was before the Selection instead of who she was after it.

Maren made up her mind walking back from the beach with Alec. She knew she was right when she saw Donovan. She just had to tell Jonathan first. He took Maren out on the west balcony. She thought it was a good place to talk.

“I’ve decided,” she said.

He smiled. “I know. I could see it on your face. It’s a good decision, I think.”

She wondered if she should take more time to think about it, but knew her decision wouldn’t change, and she wanted to avoid making Donovan wait any longer than necessary.

“I wanted to tell you first because…well, it seems only right since I’m breaking off our engagement,” she said.

He looked her straight in the eyes.

“Maren, I don’t mind a bit. I am delighted for you,” he said.

She knew he would say something like that, but she still felt a bit guilty about it.

“Still, I know you wanted a wife, and I’m sorry I can’t give you that,” she said.

He smiled. “Don’t be. You’re giving me something much better.”

“Oh?”

“You’re giving me the knowledge that the next king and queen will lead this kingdom in a new and better direction. You’re giving me a brighter future for my grandchildren, and that is much better than a wife,” he said.

She flushed. “I don’t know about all that.”

“I do. I have four granddaughters. Maybe five — did I tell you Philip, my oldest, his wife is pregnant again? Any one of them might be Wielders. I know being a Wielder will be a dangerous thing for a long time, but it will be much better for them than it was for you or my sister. That knowledge is a gift.”

She suddenly felt something extremely heavy settle upon her shoulders. She supposed it was to be expected. Being the next queen was a big responsibility.

“I hope I can live up to it,” she said.

“I know you will.”

She was not as confident.

“It’s terrifying,” she admitted.

He chuckled. “Which part?”

“All of it. But the baby is more immediate than being queen,” she said. “I’m so worried I won’t be able to protect them.”

“Would it help you to know that’s normal? I worry about my sons just as much today as I did when they were born. That’s what being a parent is,” he said.

“The good news is that your baby has two extraordinary parents to protect them. And do remember that Uncle Jonathan does have an army,” he added with a wink.

She laughed. She supposed if her baby would have more dangers than the average child, they would have more protection too.

“I’m deeply grateful to you. I came here to marry you, and you’re helping me marry someone else.”

He shook his head. “You came here to marry him. We just didn’t know that. Everything works out the way it’s supposed to, I think. And who knows, perhaps this will lead to me marrying, we just don’t know it yet.”

“Perhaps,” she agreed.

“Go and tell him. He’s probably half-mad with waiting,” he said. “Oh, and if you talk to Jenny, tell her I’ll keep her on.”

She smiled and stood. “Thank you, Jonathan. For everything.”

“Maren, it is my pleasure.”

“I think I can say we owe you a great deal,” she said.

He smiled. “Well, if you want to start repaying me, Jonathan sounds like a lovely name for the baby. Oh, and he’d be king! King Jonathan sounds very nice, don’t you think?”

Maren laughed and left the balcony. She was going to go directly to Donovan’s room, only she didn’t know where it was. So, she decided the most expedient thing would be to go to her rooms and summon someone from the staff to bring her to him.

She found that she was extraordinarily happy. She felt at peace with her decision, even though it was risky. Maren thought she would rather live her life fully with some danger than live a half a life in safety.

She worried about dozens of things, but she also felt that as long as she and Donovan were together, everything would be alright.

When Donovan arrived at Maren’s rooms, he decided not to knock on her door. He didn’t want her to feel like he might be rushing her. But he didn’t want to leave either. So, he just stood there for a bit, aimlessly waiting and trying to come up with a valid reason to see her.

He had maybe been there for five or ten minutes when he saw her coming down the hall. He was grateful that she looked amused and not angry to see him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to pester you, only…well, I was trying to find an excuse to see you,” he said.

She smiled. “I’m glad you’re here. I was going to go to your room, only I didn’t know where it was.”

His heart leapt. She wanted to see him, and she looked happy. This was an excellent sign.

“I don’t mean to be rude, but if you don’t know where your guests are, you aren’t a terribly good lady of the house,” he said with a wink.

He was only teasing, but he hoped it would lead the conversation in the direction he thought it was going.

“How very fortunate I will not be the lady of this house,” she said, returning his smile.

He had to resist the urge to cheer. He wanted to shout and grab her and yell to the whole house that she would be his forever.

That wasn’t very appropriate, though, so instead he asked, “Will you be the lady of mine, then?”

“Well, the palace doesn’t really belong to you, does it?” she said, smirking.

He laughed.

“Can we go in to your hideous accommodations, so I can kiss you properly, or are we just going to stand in the hall and grin at each other like lunatics?”

She smiled and swished past him to open the door to the sitting room. He followed her and when she turned back to him, he wrapped his arms around her, and pressed his lips to hers.

Gods, it was bliss. He kissed her again, and again, and again. It had been hardly more than a week since he kissed her last, but it felt like an eternity.

He pressed his forehead to hers.

“I love you,” he said.

“I love you,” she whispered back.

It was the best thing he had ever heard.

He kissed her.

“You’ll really marry me?” he asked.

He knew she’d said she would, but he was still slightly stunned by her decision.

“I really will. I must be mad,” she said, smiling.

They kissed again and he heard her she sigh. He was so happy, he thought his heart might burst. He once thought she’d never be in his arms again; he could hardly believe she would never leave them.

“And we’re having a baby,” he said.

Gods, a baby. A baby with Maren. It was the most magnificent thing he could think of. It was a miracle.

She smiled and nodded. “The Drakes think so, and I suppose I have to believe their collective powers.”

He laughed. “I heard the Duke informed you about it. I never would have imagined that.”

“You cannot have been as surprised as I was,” she said, laughing.

He thought that was likely right, but he felt as though he was done talking about anyone else for the moment.

He kissed her again.

“I’m so happy,” he said.

She smiled. “Me too.”

He buried his fingers in her hair and pressed his lips to her ear.

“Show me to the hideous bedroom?”

He felt strongly he needed to be as close to her as possible.

She smiled. “I don’t know, it’s reallyhideous”

“It isn’t the walls I want to look at,” he whispered, running his fingers down the side of her face.

She stiffened.

“Ah…perhaps that isn’t a good idea,” she said.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, concerned.

She flushed and mumbled something. He couldn’t make out the whole thing, but he distinctly heard “don’t want you to see” and “bruises.”

He could have kicked himself. In all the tension and excitement, he forgot she was still recovering from what Kieran had done. He knew it, of course, but forgot that it meant she was still bruised.

“Oh, love, I’m so sorry. I forgot,” he said. “But it doesn’t matter to me. I just want to be with you.”

She grimaced.

“I don’t want anyone else to be there with us,” she said.

He pursed his lips. It already felt like Kieran had appeared in the room with them. He didn’t want that either.

“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. And I absolutely don’t want to hurt you.”

She just leaned against him and sighed. He could tell she was annoyed.

“Should you blindfold me then?” he asked.

He was mostly joking, hoping to cheer her up. Mostly.

She laughed.

“Or I could blindfold you?” he suggested.

She laughed again. “I don’t see how that would help the current issue.”

“Well, it’d be fun,” he said, grinning.

She smiled at that, and he was grateful to see it.

“If you'd like, just leave your chemise on,” he said. “But I’m happy to sit with you fully clothed.”

She smiled. “I do want,” she said. “That’s a good idea.”

He thought so, too. She took him by the hand and led him to the bedroom.

“Just don’t squish me,” she said.

“Ooh, I like it when you’re on top.”

She laughed.

They kept kissing and laughing as they undressed one another, leaving a trail of discarded clothing behind them. She did leave her chemise on, and he hoped she was comfortable. He was a bit shy of touching her, not wanting to cause her pain, but focused on avoiding the side he knew was the worst.

They lay down in bed together, kissing and caressing each other until they couldn’t wait a second longer.

“I need you…now,” he rumbled in her ear.

She gently pushed him over and moved on top of him.

He was surprised. He did like when she was on top (he thought just about every man liked that) but it was something of a novelty. She was sometimes too shy, and he was sometimes too impatient.

“Oh, it’s like that?” he mused.

“I’m feeling particularly bold today,” she said. “It isn’t every day you agree to become the queen.”

He chuckled and pulled her to him, so he could kiss her.

“At your service, Your Majesty,” he said with a wink.

She lowered herself onto him without warning and he groaned. Being inside of her was ecstasy.

She smirked at his reaction.

“Minx,” he breathed as she began to move over him, rocking her hips.

He closed his eyes, just enjoying the perfect feeling of the moment.

Then it was his turn to smirk when he pressed his thumb against her in a way that made her gasp and jerk her hips.

“Rake,” she breathed.

And then he didn’t think anymore. He just felt.

“Gods, I am so glad I don’t have to live without you,” Donovan said as they lay intertwined.

Maren laughed. “Just the one reason, though, I’m sure.”

He kissed her. “Well, there are several dozen reasons, but going to bed with you is in the top three.”

“Are the other two my breasts?” she asked, winking at him.

He laughed. “Well, no, the rest of the reasons are more romantic than carnal.”

She sighed. She was terribly happy. There were certainly problems ahead of them, but for the moment, all she needed was to simply be with him.

“I missed you so much,” she said.

“Me too. It was a very long week,” he said.

She hadn’t had a very good week either.

“Was it awful?”

Much to her surprise, he chuckled. “I didn’t tell anyone you’d left until Alec sent word that you’d arrived. I stayed in my apartment moping which was suitable. And then I still stayed in my apartment for three more days, also moping. I intended to spend at least three more days moping, but then my father arrived in my apartment.”

“Seriously?”

As far as she knew, the King had not been in Donovan’s apartment the whole time she’d lived at the palace. He usually summoned people he wanted to talk to.

Donovan nodded. “I was also surprised. He’s done that only two or three other times in ten years. Anyway, he gave me a lecture on keeping up appearances, told me the best way to forget about a woman is with another woman, and ordered me to appear publicly before the end of the day.”

“The best way to forget about a woman is with another woman? What sort of nonsense is that?”

He sighed. “I don’t know. It was the same thing he told me after the situation with Madison. It…ah…well, I had reason to know it didn’t work, at least not for me. And besides… I couldn’t forget you. So, I kept up appearances for a few days until I got Alec’s second telegram. Then I claimed I was going on a getaway to the southern coast and left.”

She was curious how he knew another woman didn’t help him forget a woman, but didn’t want to pry. It didn’t really matter, either.

“Was your week awful?” he asked.

She sighed. “Yes.”

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

“No. But… I will,” she said.

She still wasn’t ready to talk about what Kieran had done (she still wasn’t convinced that forgetting it wasn’t an option). But she thought she could talk about the week since then.

So, she told Donovan about everything—even the nightmares. He was deeply sympathetic—even about the fact that she had liked Jonathan.

“Gods, no wonder you were unhappy to see me. I’m so sorry, Maren,” he said when she was finished.

“Well, I am glad you came, I just wasn’t prepared for a surprise,” she said. “Or really any additional stress.”

“Everything will be alright now,” he said, stroking her face.

She smiled. It certainly felt that way.

They decided to spend the rest of the afternoon together in bed. They couldn’t think of anything better to do. Maren still had some concerns about what she was going to say to her parents and what Donovan’s might do when he told them, but for the most part, she wasn’t worried. They’d deal with whatever problems they encountered together.

“How are you feeling, really?” he asked.

She laughed. “Is it part of pregnancy that everyone constantly asks this?”

He smiled. “Probably.”

“I’m alright. A bit nauseous. A bit sore. Exhausted,” she said. “Alec said it’s normal. Actually, he said that it might get worse.”

“Don’t worry, love. I’ll take care of you,” he said.

She smiled. She liked the idea of being taken care of by him.

“Do you want to nap?” he asked.

“I might fall asleep whether I want to or not,” she said, laughing a bit.

He kissed her and shifted so that she could lay with her head on his chest. It was bliss.

“Sleep if you like, love. I’m not going anywhere.”

She smiled and closed her eyes. She was so tired.

The next thing she knew, the sun was setting, and she was waking up in Donovan’s arms. It appeared he had dozed off as well. She supposed they should dress for dinner soon, but they didn’t have to get up just yet.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

It was probably Jenny coming to see if she needed help dressing for dinner. Maren would go see her in the dressing room in a minute.

She expected Jenny to wait for her in the dressing room. She did not expect for Jenny to open the door and come into her bedroom, but that’s exactly what her maid did.

“My lady — oh! Oh! I’m so sorry, I’ll just, I’ll come back!” she cried, apparently having noticed Maren had a man in her bed.

Said man, having been awakened by the noise, popped his head up, flawlessly displaying that he was not, in fact, the man Jenny believed Maren was about to marry.

Jenny turned bright pink before spinning on her heel and leaving the room.

Maren tried to call after her, but it was too late. She scrambled out of bed and grabbed her dressing gown before rushing after her.

Jenny was in the dressing room, apparently trying to recover from shock.

“Ah, Jenny, what you saw —“

“It’s none of my business, my lady,” she squeaked.

Well, it wasn’t. But Maren disliked the idea of Jenny feeling uncomfortable about what she’d seen.

“I just don’t want you to think you need to hide anything from the Duke —“

“I won’t say anything, my lady!”

“No, Jenny, I’m trying to tell you it’s not a problem. I’m not marrying the Duke,” she said.

Jenny looked horrified. “Does he know?”

Maren suppressed a smile. “He knows. Oh, and he said he’ll keep you on, so you don’t have to worry about finding a new job.”

“Oh! But, my lady! What is going to happen to you?”

Maren smiled. “I appreciate your concern. I’ll be fine. I’m just marrying someone else. Don’t worry.”

Jenny gasped hugely. “Was that the Prince? I heard he was here!”

Maren suppressed a laugh and nodded.

Jenny buried her face in her hands. “I didn’t curtsy or anything!”

“Really, don’t worry. It wasn’t exactly a formal introduction.”

Jenny looked worried but nodded. Maren wondered if she would believe that the Prince was who Maren was marrying. Maren barely believed it.

“Ah, would you like help dressing for dinner?”

Maren thought Jenny deserved the night off.

“Ah…no, thank you… I’ll see you in the morning. Just…ah…don’t come in the bedroom unless I call for you,” she said.

When she went back into the bedroom, Donovan was laughing.

“I’m not sure that she believed me. I think she thought that I was being unfaithful right under Jonathan’s nose,” she said, amused, but not quite as amused as Donovan.

“Possibly, it would have been wise to inform the staff before we went to bed together,” he said, smirking.

She raised her eyebrow at him. “And whose idea was it to go to bed in the middle of the day?”

He grinned. “I’m fairly sure it was mutual.”

She couldn’t help but smile. It was.