The Kingdom of Secrets and Ruin

Ruairi

The past few days have felt like hell on earth. Having to dig Ethrial out if the hole I left them in due to Silas` care isn’t the case of simply removing him like I originally thought. It seems that there’s a deep root of prejudice to dig out of the court first… and then there’s Dalliah.

It’s so much easier to just focus on the politics, even though I seem to fail at it every step of the way. When it comes to what happened with Dalliah though, I don’t even know where to start, so I’ve been avoiding it, avoiding her.

I apologised, hell, I keep apologising inside of my mind every time I see her, because I shouldn’t have kissed her. I know she’s not interested, a blind man could see that much, and yet I keep pushing her until she finally opens up, only to waste all of the progress in getting her to trust me on a spur-of-the-moment kiss.

How I won this continent I have no idea because all I seem to be at the moment is a class A idiot.

“You look like you’re sucking on a lemon,” Avery says to me across the table.

We’ve been here for hours rifling through the accounts from the past few months, trying to understand why this kingdom is struggling so much. Crops are fine, trade is good, if not significantly higher than usual, and taxes are being paid on time. However, my rule to make it equal across the kingdom seems to have gone amiss, unsurprisingly.

Just when I think I’ve reached my peak frustration with Silas, things like that seem to pop up and I want to go down to the cells and slam his head into the bars. Violence can’t be the answer though, as easy as it’ll be to kill him, he has loyalists here who will feel threatened as a result. It’ll take too long to rebuild the court from the ground up, with the right balance between Eradeon and local, but there’s no denying the temptation. Especially after what’s been allowed to go on.

It also doesn’t help that we need to head back to Apheya in the next day or two for the Easter celebrations planned, my mother stayed behind to organise them and I thought it would be fine since our next stop is next to us anyway. I couldn’t have foreseen this though, that’s for sure.

“Forgive me for not jumping with joy, maybe next month,” I grumble while taking a swig of my ale, having to stomach it even early in the day as the water here is too murky to trust.

So I make a mental note to bring some gallons back with me after the ‘festivities’ are finally over.

“You were better at controlling your face during the war.” He comments without accusation, but it stings nonetheless.

“I had bigger priorities, or did you take too many blows to the head and forget what we were fighting?” I snap, far too defensively when considering it’s my friend I’m talking to and he makes comments like this all the time when wanting to get under my skin.

Tedric kicks Avery under the table to shut him up, but the bastard knows what I need more than what I want, which is someone to give it to me straight.

“You’re stressed Rhu, more than usual and it can’t just be Silas’ mess that’s got you here. Fess up or we can’t help.” He crosses his arms while glaring at me, daring me to tell him he’s wrong.

Tedric swoops in before I can answer though, having more tact than Avery and I combined, but there’s nothing new there.

“What Avery is trying to say, with his twisted pea-sized mind, is that we’re worried about you and we don’t know how to help.” He raises an eyebrow at his ally as if to say, that’s how you do it.

“I’m fine.” A lie we all know, so they don’t even bother replying and just wait. “Dammit! Okay I’m not fine, I screwed this kingdom almost as badly as they screwed us by putting that prick in charge… and I didn’t even know it! Happy?” I slam my hands loudly against the table, shaking it and spilling my drink on the paper.

I swear if one more thing in my life goes wrong, I’m about to explode. What the hell is wrong with me?

Sliding my chair back aggressively, I stalk over to the window in the hopes that some air will cool my red face. I hate getting so frustrated, and would hate it even further if it wasn’t just us three in here.

“Okay, but we’re dealing with it, aren’t we? What else? What’s got you so worked up that you can barely keep your head straight?” Tedric narrows his eyes at me, clearly not liking how hard it’s been for them to get things out of me so far.

“Nothing.”

Avery takes over, ignoring Tedric’s pointed look, “So why have you been avoiding the maid?”

“She’s not a damn maid!”

The look of victory on his face is so smug that I wish I could slap it off. But he’s always been too quick for me, so I go back to glaring out the window like a sullen child. Which is fitting really, as I’m no better than one for the way I’ve been behaving with her this week.

For every meal, I’ve had her seated as far away from me as possible without implying insult, while taking up some urgent subject with my sister that leaves no place for us to talk. She probably hates me for the way I ran off and I don’t blame her either, but I don’t know how to fix this.

“You’ve gotta start listening to me Ted, walking on eggshells will get you nowhere.” Avery pats him on the back condescendingly, and for the first time today, I smile when Tedric punches him in the gut, winding him in the process.

“Thanks.”

“My pleasure.” He turns back to me, “So are we gonna talk or are you going to just stand there?”

I pause for a second, trying to think of the best course of action, “I’ll talk… Just not with you.”

For a woman I’ve struggled to avoid these past few days, you’d think she’d be easier to find now that I’m ready to face the music. But no, she’s not in the library, not in the day room and nowhere in the stables.

It goes without saying that her room and Odelina’s should be off limits, but after sitting around on an over stuffed couch for half an hour, I feel time slipping away from me and say to hell with it and head in that direction anyway. If someone sees her in a compromising position I’ll just have them killed, simple as that.

It takes a few guesses and almost accidents before I find the right door. She opens it before I can knock and almost walks straight into me.

“Rh-Your Majesty, what are you doing?” She squeaks, clearly not expecting to find me out here with a raised fist in her face. I have to force myself not to smile at how close she was to calling me by my name though, as I’m not here to tease.

“I came to apoligise for the ki-” She yanks me by the front of my tunic into the room, slamming the door behind us before I can finish the last word.

It’s a surprising turn of events to say the least and I wouldn’t have expected this from her. Or perhaps has she not realised the magnitude of dragging her king into her chambers?

“Could you be any louder?” She runs her hands through her hair, “Are you trying to ruin me?” Her eyes lock with mine in a glare, but even so it still reminds me of the moment we shared before the kiss.

I wish I hadn’t ruined it.

“Speaking of ruin, you just locked me in your room.” I can’t help but point out, my tongue getting the better of me.

Her eyes widen in realisation and a sweet blush takes over her cheeks, which gives me more pleasure than I’d ever admit. How could someone be this beautiful and not know it?

“I- erm” Her hand is raised to her forehead as she tries to think, panic taking over and I’m more than happy to push that to the side where I can.

“Don’t worry, I can climb.” I laugh as lightly as I can to try and calm her, while pointing to the window, “I just wanted to apologise again for my behaviour. I’ve tried to keep away but that doesn’t make what I did any better.”

“You’ve said as much.”

Her expression faulters for a second before she steels herself and crosses her arms. The purple fabric of the dress doing wonders for her silky brown skin, and for a second I’m distracted.

“Yes well, I’m saying it again.” I wince inwardly at how awkward this feels, but I know I deserve it.

She laughs humoursly and moves to sit on one of her chairs, “Can you avoid making it a third?” Her voice lowers to almost a whisper, as she mutters to herself but I manage to catch it, “Afterall you’re the one with the problem.”

Wait, what is that what she thinks?

“Problem? Who said problem?”

“You’re the one who kissed me and then keeps apologising for it, you tell me.” She snaps and for a second I’m actually left speechless.

Does this mean what I think it does, or have I gone too heavy on the ale today? The latter seems far more likely.

“Are you saying you didn’t want me to apologise?”

For the second time today I watch as her cheeks turn red and I have my unexpected answer. My mind starts to buzz instantly, trying to understand what the hell this means and how I could have missed it, but I’m disturbed by her standing again, and moving towards the door.

“I think now’s the time for you to leave, Your Majesty.” Her voice is as cold as it was on day one, and I’m floored at how we’ve gotten here in the space of a moment.

“Leave? I don’t understand, have I offended you Doll?”

I hold my arm out towards her, but she’s out of reach just as quickly before laughing coldly. “Only you could come in here, rubbing your regret in my face, and then ask me to explain how you embarrassed me.”

My eyes close as the words registar and I groan aloud at my stupidity. If I could eat my own words, I would, but at least I now know where I’ve gone wrong. I mean have I not got a sister to teach me about things as simple as this?

“No Doll, trust me when I say the only regret I had was for making you uncomfortable.” I pause, waiting for her to understand but her face remains closed off. “I want you Doll, more than I’ve wanted any woman before.”