The Kingdom of Secrets and Ruin

Dalliah

Much to Tedric’s frustration, or so I’ve heard, our small party is taking place in the library where the fire is always lit to prevent damp, and the feeling it creates is the most relaxed.

There are 6 or 7 ladies that have joined us at Odelina’s request and the table once dedicated for writing letters, is now filled with mugs of wine. To my surprise they’ve been served warm, something I’ve never seen before and there also appears to be a mix of spices brewed in too that reminds me of Christmas time. Not that I’ve gotten to fully celebrate it before.

I sigh aloud the first few times I’ve taken a sip, enjoying it far more than I should and by my second helping I’m surprised not to feel it go to my head yet. Am I getting better at this or worse at being able to sense it?

Either way, I’m a failure when it comes to trying to talk to those around me. All they seem to want to do is reminisce about their home on the islands, or their time travelling in the war. I of course can offer nothing to those conversations, so I just sit and nurse my drink while taking it in.

It’s not that they’re unwelcoming, in fact, they’re the opposite. It’s just all that they have to say interests me so much and really I don’t want to interrupt them. This is the first time I’m properly leaving my home, so to hear about how they were away for years and still are, fascinates me.

It gives me hope for my next move.

“Have you ever been in the water, Dalliah? I heard you were ill at the coast so mightn’t have had the chance to try it.” Rebekah, a tall brunette asks me from across the circle we find ourselves in.

From the question you can tell that she’s ignorant of the reason behind my illness, as she’s smiling as if genuinely interested in my answer. I want to lie and say that I haven’t to avoid talking about my accident and bringing the collective feeling down, but Odelina knows the truth and others might as well.

I swallow hard, pretending it was a sip from my now empty mug, “Once, but I’m not a strong swimmer.”

Odelina’s head snaps in my direction, she must have heard me over her conversation with the lady next to her and offers me a small smile before clearing her throat.

“I was just saying to Grace about the mulled wine… has anyone else noticed how we’ve managed to keep our heads so well?” All eyes turn to her and I mouth ’thank you’ subtly when her gaze finds mine for a second.

“It’s because the heat melts away the alcohol, making it less strong and easier to take.” She laughs like it’s the most interesting thing in the world and while it answers my question from before, I think it’s an act to fully turn the conversation.

I’m grateful and don’t deserve the kindness she offers me most days.

Before long dinner is brought to us, as we’ve been excused from the larger party and it’s nice to get a break from eating in front of so many people. Yes there’s still quite a few here but it’s not as bad, and I was dreading having to sit at that long table again like we did at breakfast.

Now I’m able to take my time as I try some of the fruits and pastries I don’t recognize.

This is my first time properly eating at a court that isn’t travelling or holding up in an inn somewhere. It’s fair to say that I’m used to simple meals, heartier meals but the one here is more rich and delicate. I’m not sure what to think.

There are more courses, prettier plates and I’ve never been so glad for my mother having taught me the difference between silverware. Even if most of the women here are picking at it with it being such a casual setting.

“You eat so well with being new to the party, what was it you did before again?” A woman whose name I’ve failed to remember asks from my right and I feel the heat go to my cheeks as I start to answer.

“Julie, you can’t ask her that! She was a maid back in Apheya and we were told not to bring it up unless she wanted to.” Rebekah scolds her and I want the ground to swallow me whole from the way she talks as if I can’t hear.

“I don’t remember any of that, but I wasn’t being rude… I just wanted to know.” She turns to me, clearly not wanting the point to drop and I try my best not to wince in anticipation of what she might say, “I was a baker back home and my mother was a cleaner, so there’s nothing to be ashamed of around here.”

This surprises me, I thought they were all of noble birth and does it make me a bad person to feel glad in knowing that she’s had to earn a living before as well? Maybe I’m not the odd one out after all, or at least not as much as I thought I was.

“Thank you.” I answer awkwardly and it sort of comes out like a question, but I’d like to think that my face makes it seem genuine.

“Honestly you have less tact than a horseshoe.” Rebekah scolds my interviewer before taking a bite from her plate and rolling her eyes.

All before grinning at me warmly to try and make up for how uncomfortable I must seem, and to make it clear that I’m not the problem.

But I am or they wouldn’t be fighting, would they? It’s not something I like to see unless it’s Avery and Odelina’s playful bickering so I always avoided it where possible in the servant’s hall. Hence I have no idea how to undo whatever this is.

“You would know, your first wage was for mucking out horses… remember?”

My eyes widen, not expecting that to be said and thankfully Odelina walks over, sensing tension from a mile away and clearly only catching the last few jibes thrown between the two.

The image of Rebekah mucking out horses in the fine dress she’s wearing is hard to picture, but I can’t help but try at this revelation.

“Enough!” She sighs, locking eyes with me to try and get a read on the problem at hand, “What on earth are you two fighting over now?”

It pleases me to hear that it’s not just a one-off caused by discussing me, and I don’t miss the smug expression Rebekah aims towards Julie.

“Julie was asking Dalliah about her life as a maid, making her uncomfortable and ignoring the king’s orders.” There’s no denying that she sounds like a child when reporting to her princess just now and it’s hard not to cringe even though she was trying to help me out.

That or using me as an excuse but I don’t really care as long as this ends already.

“I wasn’t making her uncomfortable, I was putting her at ease… it’s clear she has no idea the kind of lives we used to live.”

I don’t appreciate being essentially called clueless, but she’s not wrong. Are there any others that aren’t these perfect noble women I’ve been fearing all night?

Odelina reads as much on my face and the corner of her mouth rises slightly, knowing how to help in an instant. The ladies are all gathered around me and before I know it, they’re talking about the islands again, but rather than how beautiful they are or how much they miss them, they talk about their roles there.

There’s no one in this room who hasn’t worked with their hands and even Odelina talks about how she used to manage the home with her mother, cleaning, cooking and fishing. It makes them seem more approachable, less intimidating and when I finally make the move to join in, I don’t fail this time.