SWNOVELS The Hidden Falling: Chapter 9
one by one after being dismissed, touching me briefly before they leave in a show of strength and support. Runa settles at their touch, happy they have calmed down and are trusting us to take care of the problem.
Josie comes up to me last with Danny, her eyes red around the edges from holding back tears of fear for me, for us all. This could be the last time we ever see each other. I grab her and pull her close, breathing her in as wildflowers fill my senses, her favorite scent. A soft cry escapes her, and I rub soothing circles on her back, shushing her gently. Danny puts his hand on her shoulder, squeezing tenderly and prying her away from me. We stare at each other, so many unspoken words passing between us. Not a single sound escapes us, but knowing exactly what we are saying.
Come back to us.
“Be safe,” Josie whispers, her voice trembling with the words. I nod, unable to speak over the lump in my throat, to tell her that I will be when we both know I can’t promise that.
Danny guides her away from the gathering, their steps slow as they walk. When they reach the edge of the trees, Josie looks back at me one more time, sadness flooding her eyes before she turns and disappears from sight. They will probably go back to their cabin and hold each other tight tonight, like they are the only ones in the world. A sharp pain goes through me at that thought. Would I ever have that? Would I ever have someone to hold me tight and look at me like I was their world? Would I ever let anyone? Would I even have the chance?
Colten sighs and throws himself onto a bench heavily, pulling me out of my depressing thoughts. “Well, how screwed are we?” he asks.
“Col,” Hudson snaps at him, glaring so hard at the younger male you would expect him to drop dead any second. Taylor and Sebastian come closer to where we are standing, checking around us for any listening ears.
Colten shrugs, looking down and picking at his pants. “What?” he replies, unbothered. “We’re fucked unless by some miracle they don’t find us here. If they have a task, they see it through. My father was exactly like that. He would become obsessed and be gone for weeks and weeks at a time until he completed what he set out to do. They are called the Elites for a reason. They are the best at what they do. With a reputation like theirs, most people usually stay out of their way. They may live in Vrohkaria, but they are a class of their own. Even the Highers are wary of them.”
This isn’t news based on what Edward has told me, or from what I have read in the texts on Vrohkaria’s history. The Elites have been around for hundreds of years, created by the first council of Highers after the King and Queen died. But hearing it come out so seriously from Colten sends a shiver down my spine. He knows firsthand what an Elite is like.
“I know their reputation, well some of it, but they bleed like anyone else. Elite or not, we have to protect the pack at all costs.” I look at each of my closest pack members, and they nod in agreement, knowing we have to do whatever it takes. Kade stays silent, still refusing to look at me.
“Sarah is still not in any fit state to move,” Josh interjects, steering the conversion away from the Elites and tilting his head in the direction of the healer’s cabin. “If the Elites do get into Eridian, she can’t be moved. She wouldn’t be able to handle it.” My eyebrows raise at him in surprise. How does he know what she could or couldn’t handle? He’s not seen her since the day she arrived many weeks ago.
I pinch my lip with my fingers, wondering what the best thing would be to do. If we had to move her, she would need to be sedated, it would be too risky otherwise. Although, being drugged and waking up in a different place again wouldn’t be good for her mental state. But it’s better than having to return with the Elites if it came down to that.
“I think it’s best if we leave her where she is for now,’’ I offer, and Josh’s shoulders relax. His chest rises with a deep breath before letting it out slowly. Interesting. I set my eyes back to Taylor as I ask, “How many trap stones do we have?”
Taylor tilts his head, his amber eyes focusing as he thinks. “Eight,” he finally says. “We also have a few slow ones.”
“Hmmm,” I contemplate, reaching down and pulling my knife from my boot and twirling it in my hand. I copy the moves that Sebastian is doing with his own blade since the pack members left. He notices me watching him after a few moments and his tawny eyes flash in amusement before executing more difficult movements. “Asshole,” I grumble when I can’t keep up with him. He chuckles, throwing me a wink, then flips the blade around and launches it in the poor, unsuspecting tree across from him.
“What are you thinking?” Hudson inquires, pulling my stare away from a smug faced Seb.
I put my knife back in my boot and place my hands on my hips before turning to Hudson. “I’m thinking that the best way to deal with the Elites if they are alive, which is highly likely, is using the creatures of The Deadlands against them. If we can lead a lot of the creatures to where they are without being seen, they will be overrun and left with only two options. Die or retreat.” I don’t want anyone to die, but if it’s between them or my pack, I’ll choose my pack every single time.
“I agree.” Taylor nods. “If it works, they won’t know anyone is living out here, and they will have to conclude that Sarah has also died.”
“I think it could work,” Colten chimes in, standing up and stretching while Hudson, Josh and Seb nod in agreement. Kade doesn’t respond.
“There is one problem though,” Taylor says, his eyes holding mine. “If they die, won’t more Elites or the Highers come looking for them?”
Well, shit. I didn’t think of that. I groan out loud. “So we have to send them back, and make them give up the search.” I nod, resigned, knowing this is going to be more difficult than just having them die. If we fail, we are more than likely not coming home. “Edward can’t help us either. He doesn’t know where the Elites are specifically, and he isn’t even supposed to know they were sent to The Deadlands. We’re on our own with this.”
I know if Edward could help us, he would. He has risked his life many times over the years in helping people come here, in helping us. If the Highers found out about what he was doing, he would be sentenced to death. He’s broken too many laws. Repeatedly.
I’ve always felt like Edward was our safety net. And now to have that suddenly gone, we are free falling with nothing to catch us. It’s scary having to face a problem as serious as this ourselves when we have never faced something like this before. The outcome will affect every single member of the pack in ways that are yet to be seen.
I look at my friends, the people I’m closest to, memorizing their faces as they do the same. The air changes with a sense of helplessness that I try really hard not to feel. This might be the last time I see them in our home, and a lump forms in my throat. I cough roughly to cover up the sob that wants to escape, causing the guys to look away from me and pretend they hadn’t noticed that show of vulnerability.
Sebastian flips a new blade aggressively, his jaw tight. Taylor stands extremely still, staring hard at the floor like it has all the answers. Colten rubs the back of his neck, looking up into the sky, and Hudson stares at Colten with a look of determination in his blue eyes. Josh still looks at me, his stare on the side of my face roaming over my features. And I… I look at Kade. His sharp jawline, strong nose, high cheekbones, his hair blowing gently in the breeze. I memorize every detail down to the tattoo on his right forearm, the blood link proudly displayed in between the lines and swirls.
He got his tattoos just hours before his eighteenth birthday as part of a sacred ritual my family completes before they get their wolf. It is a blessing upon oneself, a show of faith in our Gods, a show of respect to his wolf, and a show of loyalty to his family. That night is a precious memory I hold close to my heart, thankful I was able to be there for that monumental moment in his life and to be included in marking him permanently. I’m truly proud I can call him family.
Right now, though, he isn’t happy with my decision for him to stay here. I know he will gladly step up and be whatever the pack needs him to be, but he believes he should be going with us. He doesn’t have to speak for me to know this, I just know him well enough to gauge his thoughts.
“Tell Finn, Axel and Eliza to go wolf when we leave, Josh. It might take a little bit for Kade to get his head on straight after we leave.”
Josh nods subtly at my request, not saying a word as he looks at the man we have brought up together. He walks over to Kade and plonks down next to him, both sitting in silence as I watch. They got into so many arguments when Kade was younger. He was always an act first, think later kind of kid, not realizing the dangers around him. Josh would constantly lecture him about looking where he’s going, or to think before he decided to chase a rabbit down a narrow hole and get himself stuck. But seeing them sitting side by side, their body language says it all. All three of us formed a bond because of our old pack, and it’s unbreakable. I wished for a long time that we had a good life in our old place, that we were surrounded by our families, that we were loved and taken care of. I don’t wish that anymore. My home is here, my people are here. I wouldn’t change my past because it meant I ended up here with my chosen family.
Josh nudges Kade’s shoulder, a small smile on his face. “Come on, Carzan, it’s not all bad. You’re really needed here to keep the pack safe. We’re not just shoving you out the way. You need to keep things running smoothly and help anyone who needs it. We trust you with this.”
“I can help you out there,” Kade grounds out. “I have my wolf now, another person is another chance of making the Elites leave.”
“It’s also another person that we could lose,” I explain, eyeing him warily. “You are about to stand in for me, Kade, you are the only one who can while we are not here. You have to put pack needs before your own. They will be looking to you to reassure and guide them. I have taught you everything I do here. I have been since you were eleven. It is important you step up now and put your feelings aside. I have no doubt you will be what they need, whether it’s for a few days, weeks, or permanently.” I gulp over the last word, hating it is a possibility, but knowing we can’t hide from it. We can’t ignore that we may not come back.
The Deadlands are more dangerous the further inside you go. We could run into all sorts of creatures and be killed off before we even have a chance.
Kade shakes his head, fists clenching on his knees as he still refuses to look at me. “You expect me to just let you leave me here while you go out to possibly die? We are always together.”
“I know we are.” I walk forward and sit down next to him, taking his clenched fist in my hand. I pry his fingers open and link ours together. I don’t like this any more than he does. The possibility of never seeing his face again will tear me up if I think about it too much. But the alternative is just not an option.
“I’m not saying you are not capable of helping, I wouldn’t have put you in charge if I thought otherwise. We don’t know what we are getting ourselves into when we leave. We are going in blind. I need someone here who can take care of the pack, especially the pups. They love you and have missed you a lot since you have been going out for longer lately.” I give his hand a gentle squeeze. “I don’t like leaving you behind any more than you do, but it’s the right decision. You know this is the way to proceed. Emotions cannot sway these decisions that are made for the pack.” For you, I add to myself. I whisper down the link to him. “Please understand.”
He lets out a small snarl and then blows out a breath. Finally, he looks at me, his eyes sad but sure in the decision he has made. He nods, and accepts that he’s staying here, pulling me into a hug. I lean into him in relief and look at Josh over his shoulder. Josh gives me a small smile and wraps his arms around us both, pulling us close. We sit there holding each other close for a few precious, quiet moments, breathing each other in while our wolves rub up against the others below the surface of our skin. Until Seb decides to open his mouth.
“Do I get to join in, or is it limited to three?” he drawls. Before I can open my mouth to tear him a new asshole, we’re being jumped on. The breath I took to verbally rip him to shreds turns into a squeal when I feel the weight of him on my back.
The next thing I know, the rest of the guys are there adding to the pile and squishing us until we fall off the bench and onto the dirt floor. I laugh as I pinch someone’s side and they let out a high pitch squeal that makes me snort. Oh, that is some good bribery material I could use for later. I flick my eyes forward to see Josh pulling someone’s hair, Kade squashed beneath us all eating dirt, and Hudson with someone in his armpit. Gods help them.
“Tap out! I tap out!” comes a muffled voice from somewhere as the sound of someone gagging hits my ears. I shove Seb, the squealer, off my back, but not before getting in a cheeky nipple pinch and rolling off of Kade. He looks like he’s barely breathing after the weight of us on top of him. Taylor stands next to us, arms folded, but I see the amusement in his eyes. Still chuckling, I sit up and look over to see Colten on all fours gagging.
Well, at this point I think it’s safe to say it was Colten that was in Hudson’s armpit. To make it worse, Hudson is shirtless. The poor guy will be picking hair out of his teeth for a few hours.
“You.” Heave. “Dirty.” Heave. “Bastard,” Colten manages to choke out while shooting Hudson a dirty look. Hudson just smirks back at him. Meanwhile Sebastian is on the floor, crying with laughter that is just too damn contagious for me not to join in. I fall back on the ground, laughing along with them all at Colten’s expense. He’s a good sport though, and eventually joins in with us, spitting out the odd hair.
“I’m surrounded by idiots,” Kade chuckles, wiping dirt off his face and looking up at the clear blue sky trying to catch his breath. I join him, looking at the cloudless sky. The weather is warm with a slight breeze, the trees swaying along with it. Such a pretty, peaceful day for such dreadful news.
“Yeah, but we’re your idiots,” I reply with a fake smile on my face, breathing in the scent of my pack, grass and flowers. Spring is my favorite season. I hope I’ll get to see it again if all goes to plan.
Either way, Kade will still be able to continue to see it, if it’s the last thing I do. Emotion clogs my throat, and my eyes burn, but I won’t let it overrule me. Not now. I need to be clear headed for the unknown that we are about to face.
“Arbiel Cana.” It’s a whisper, but it comes out strong. It’s a vow and a statement all at once.