The Darkness We Hide

Michelle woke up in the same bed that just the night before she had shared with Gareth, cold sweat covering her body. Quickly she lunged out of bed, managing to vomit on the floor instead of the comforter.

“Poor baby,” Nancy said as she rushed over to help her up.

At her touch Michelle cringe, scrambling backwards in a crab walk, bumping painfully into the headboard.

“Hush,” Nancy cooed, handing her a cold cloth. “It’s gonna be okay sweetheart.”

“No it’s not,” the young woman sobbed, burying her face into the cloth. “Nothing is going to be ‘okay’.”

“Sweetie, he wanted to tell you,” Nancy said softly, reaching out to brush the hair back out of Michelle’s face. “He just didn’t know how.”

“How much longer was he planning on waiting?” Michelle asked, looking Nancy in the eyes. “Until he’d proposed? Until we were married, had kids?”

Michelle choked on her own words, her hand moving to touch her stomach.

“Oh God,” she breathed, fear gripping her heart.

“I know sweety,” Nancy said, hugging the young woman tightly. “Does Gareth? Does he know that you’re pregnant?”

“No,” Michelle said, her head snapping up. “You can’t tell him! Please!”

“That is something he should hear from you,” Nancy assured her. “I won’t say anything.”

“Thank you,” Michelle sighed, leaning into the older woman’s embrace.

“Was he ever going to tell me?” she sniffled.

“When he was sure that you loved him enough to understand,” the older woman said soothingly.

Unable to take in anymore, Michelle lowered her head and cried again. Nancy slowly scooted until she was next to her and put her strong arms around the crying girl.

“You just cry it out sweetie. I know when I first found out I was scared witless,” the older woman soothed.

“When my Mitch, he was Gareth’s uncle, told me we’d been dating for almost a year,” she said with a sigh, “he took me out on a picnic. We made love under an elm tree, and then he told me he had a surprise. Boy, did he ever!”

“What did you do?” Michelle hiccuped.

“Hit him on the nose with a newspaper and scolded him like he was a bad puppy,” Nancy said straight faced.

Michelle looked at Nancy as if she was insane. Soon they both broke up laughing.

“I’m just kidding,” Nancy said over her laughter. “I screamed and ran away. Since Mitch had the car keys I didn’t get very far. He changed back into himself and chased me, stark naked, through the tall grass. It took some time… a lot of time,” she clarified. “A LOT of time, some serious conversations and a flea collar.”

At this Michelle laughed again.

“I loved him so much,” Nancy continued. “Even after he showed me, I couldn’t think of my life without him. So I stayed. I married him and I changed too.”

“You changed?” Michelle asked confused.

“Yes,” Nancy said nodding her head. “I was born as human as you, but I chose to be with him, completely.”

“You’re Nana?” Michelle breathed, realization hitting her.

“Yup,” she said. “That was me.”

“What in the hell have I gotten myself into?” the young woman sobbed.

“Oh sweetheart,” Nancy said, holding Michelle as one would a child, “you just get it out of your system. When you’ve cried yourself out, a nice hot shower will help you feel better.”

“I don’t think anything in this world can make it better,” Michelle managed before hurling herself over the edge of the bed to vomit again.

“That’s it,” Nancy soothed, pulling her hair back, “just get it all out.

“When you’re done I’ll run a hot bath for you. It might not seem like it, but it will make you feel better.”

"Why is this happening?" Michelle hiccuped, using the towel in her hand to wipe her mouth.

"Destiny is an odd thing," the older woman said, exchanging the dirty towel for a cup of water.

"Drink this," she instructed, rising to rinse the towel in the bathroom sink. "It will help."

"Is it alcohol?" Michelle asked, only half-kidding.

"Just water I'm afraid," Nancy replied from the bathroom. "Anything stronger is not good for someone in your condition."

Sighing, Michelle tentatively sipped at the cold liquid, wishing she could wake up from this nightmare and be safe in Gareth's arms, no monsters in sight.

"Now," Nancy said, stepping back out of the bathroom, having started the water in the tub, "let's get you cleaned up."

After making sure the younger woman was set, and able to take care of herself, Nancy stripped the sheets from the bed and headed downstairs to face her trainwreck of