Chapter 5
Alpha Asher's POV
"What's your name?" I asked in a soft voice, and her eyes darted all over the place as if she was looking for an escape route.
I don't want my mate to stare at me like she was scared of me; I don't want my mate to be scared of me.
I want her to love me and me to love her back in return. This wasn't what I planned at all.
I have been trying to get her to talk for the past ten minutes, but she wasn't budging. I don't know how to do this, but for her, I wanted to put in every possible effort.
This was the person I've been waiting for all my life and I wasn't going to let things get messed up.
I kind of understand considering that she woke up from a terrible nightmare hours ago and she has been too scared to even blink talk-less of sleeping.
I watched her close her eyes for a bit before snapping them open again. After she had her bath, I had Edna, my Zeta get a few clothes for her till she was ready to shop for herself.
I wished she didn't go through all of these before she met me, I wish I left my region more often.
Maybe we would have met and I would have saved her from whatever was tormenting her even in the dreams. I watched her go through her last nightmare and I really felt helpless. "Okay, Let's do this. My name is Asher. What's yours?" I asked with a whisper and she finally raised her eyes to look at me.
At last, I was making progress, her eyes were fixed on her hand as if it was the most interesting thing in the room all day. I was close to giving up but her looking at me definitely means I was making good progress. "Maya, my name is Maya. The nuns from the monastery said it means a good soul." She whispered back and I tested the name on my lips. I loved the way it sounded and pronouncing it brought a smile to her face. This was real progress. I didn't know what to ask next, I was selecting my questions carefully so I don't trigger her into silence. It took a whole lot of effort after she woke up to get her to talk.
I picked her hand from the bed and I watched her jolt back in shock, she could feel it too, she could feel the mate bond too.
I was glad that I'm not the only person feeling this way, explaining it to her would be easier this way. I wondered if she ever knew what a mate was or how the bond worked.
"We are mated. Wow, I don't want a mate. I want to walk around the whole world free from everyone." She added a few minutes later and my whole body dropped in disappointment.
She was giving up on us before we even had a chance to explore our mate bond.
I feared this would happen. That was why I wanted to take my time and explain things to her. Unfortunately, someone already messed up an idea of how a mate should be for her and now I have to beat a soiled record.
"Maya, you're really going to reject
me before you get to know me?' I
asked and she nodded almost immediately. I don't know which was more disappointing, the fact that she didn't want me, the fact that she made her decision quickly and as
fast as possible.
or the fact that she seemed so sure that rejecting me was the best option for her. She wasn't even giving me an opportunity to prove that our mate bond was going to be the best thing that happened to us both.
"Maya, do you know the moon
goddess paired us for a reason, she
makes the best decision. She knows we would be perfect for each other, that's why." I added softly and wished I didn't because Maya
started throwing things and
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screaming at me to get out.
It happened too fast, one minute she was being calm with me, and the next she was acting enraged. I should have known that most people from the monastery rarely like the moon goddess, same with Daniel too.
"You sit there and tell me crap about the moon goddess and what she wants. I don't fucking care about whatever she wants and I do not want you as a mate.
She fucking sat on her throne like a princess and watched them fucked my life up and leave my body as a museum of scars.
She watched while my parents dumped me in hell, she fucking watched when everyone in the monastery got tossed out and we were turned to omegas.
We were treated as slaves and we saw hell, now I took an action by myself and you're telling me crap about a stupid goddess who couldn't even save Alpha Liam.
Don't feed me the crap. I don't need the goddess and I for one, don't care about her at all. Don't blame you, you probably grew up with a silver spoon and you don't know what life as an omega entails.
It's easier for you to say stuff about how a goddess makes the best decision.
Maybe my parents dumping me was a great decision she helped them make too. In fact, I'm getting out of here and this pack. I fucking want to see the Alpha and he should let me go. I'd rather die as a rogue than spend the rest of my life with you" She screamed in my face and for the first time, I felt like a failure. All of these could have been prevented if I had gone in search of her instead of waiting for her to come to me.
I don't what broke my heart more, the fact that she had to go through all of these alone. I felt for her. I wish I could take away all of her hurt.
I couldn't and I hated the fact that she canceled me without getting to know me. She didn't stop throwing things at me and I stepped out for a moment. This was beyond my control already.
I told the nurse on duty to sedate her
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till she was calm again and we would have another decent conversation. I walked back to the pack office feeling dejected, I couldn't get the fact that my mate didn't want me and she probably won't want me out of my head.
It hurts too much to even think of it.
I wanted to be there for her every step but she wasn't letting me. Daniel walked past me to go on patrol duties before he squeezed my shoulder in reassurance, this was way more than we thought.