Chapter 19
Cain’s POV
I checked her location on the phone and opened the port. I couldn’t use my powers to find Anastasia. The fucking curse always put a blockage of some sort on me when it came to her.
I stepped out on a roof garden and looked around. It was past midnight and I couldn’t sense any other human at this place.
The stubborn woman didn’t understand how dangerous it was for her to be out alone with my wing now.
“As if it was not high enough.” I put the phone back in my pocket and jumped where she was sitting. “What are you doing here?”
Anastasia looked at me startled.
“Where are your shoes?” I frowned at her condition.
She was disheveled from head to toe.
“I don’t know,” Anastasia slurred. “I put them somewhere.” She looked around aimlessly. “Strange! Where are my shoes? How will I go back now?”
“Where is Shae?” I tried to ask as calmly as possible.
“I put her to sleep.” She looked guilty. “She wouldn’t have let me come alone so I added sleeping pills in her milk. I wasn’t expecting them to work on her.”
“Are you insane?” I was furious. “How much did you drink?” I grimaced at all the empty bottles around her.
“Why are you scolding me?” Her bottom lip quivered. “You always shout at me and get angry.” She hugged her knees. “Stupid.”
“You got a death wish, woman?” I sneered at her bravado.
“So?” Anastasia got up and faced me bravely. “You are going to throw me down from there?” She staggered toward the parapet wall.
“Hey!” I yelled angrily when she climbed on it. “Get down.” She turned toward me and almost tripped towards the other end. “Anastasia!”
“Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality.”
I cocked one brow when she glared at me.
“I’m singing my misery.” She palmed her heart and looked away. “Open your eyes, look up to the sky and see.”
I rubbed my forehead.
She was a horrible singer in this life.
Her voice was nice but not cut out for singing.
“I’m just a poor boy,” Anastasia stopped suddenly. “But I am a girl. Cain? Am I a girl or a woman? Forget it,” She dismissed herself. “I need no sympathy.”
“Get down.” I was getting agitated by her obduracy. “You will fall.”
“You want me to fall? You want me to die?” Tears rolled down her flushed cheeks. “You hate me, Cain. It doesn’t matter to you whether I live or die.”
She squatted and hugged her knees.
“Why is this happening?” She hid her face in her palms and sobbed loudly. “Everyone is dead. Everyone keeps on dying. I am scared for Nat and Angie. Please” She looked at me pleadingly. “Don’t hurt them, please. Don’t kill them because of me.”
I closed my eyes and pinched my nose. I could imagine Einar and Xic laughing their asses off right now. Fucking morons forced me to mull over their words.
“Anastasia,” She visibly flinched when I called her.
The fear on her face upon my approach aggravated me. Her hands fisted around her knees and I could tell she was trying hard not to squirm.
“Look up,” she refused to comply. I pinched her chin and pulled her face up. “Look at me.” The fat tears in her eyes gave me a sickening feeling. “What are you, a kid?” I wiped her eyes with my index finger. “You look like a mess.”
“I know.” She mumbled. “I am unsightly in your eyes. I’m just– I’m so tired.”
“Get down for now.” I carried her off the wall. “Why drink if you can’t handle your alcohol?” I grabbed her arms when she swayed back. “You do stupidest things.”
“I don’t. You did.” She retorted haughtily. “Why did you fall for someone like her? You couldn’t even tell that beasch was conning you.” I narrowed my eyes when she scoffed. “King of dead and blah, blah, blah.”
“You are calling yourself names, Omisha?” I sneered.
“I am not Omisha.” Anastasia shrieked and pushed me back. “Don’t call me by her name,” I smirked to rouse her more. “Go away if you are going to be nasty.” I grabbed her waist and pulled her close. “No, leave.”
“Easy there, love” I chuckled when she thrashed fruitlessly in my hold.
“Why do you have to be ridiculously tall?” Anastasia looked at me sullenly. “I can’t reach your face. I want to ram my punch in it. The blue eye will add charms to your good looks.”
“Should I show you my face once more?” I threatened. “It will help you sit down in one place.”
“I am not afraid. What’s there to be afraid of? Damn you,” She pouted angrily. “Why are you handsome and hot either way?”
My hold slackened on her waist.
“One is dominatingly hot and the other is intimidatingly hot. It’s like two hotties in one body.” She laughed when I pulled her back up. “Oh!”
Anastasia grabbed my hand and put it against her cheek.
“Oh, this feels nice.” She sighed. “Cool and nice.” She removed my hand from her waist and put it on her other cheek. “Cool, cool.”
“You are not scared of me?” I felt edgy when she shook her head. “Why?”
“Because it’s not scary.” Anastasia frowned when I tried to pull my hands away. “Can I kiss you?” She said suddenly. “Bow your head a little. I want to kiss you.”
“Anastasia!” I cupped her jaw with one hand. “Enough.”
“Is it because you think I am Omisha?” her voice cracked at the end. “But I’m not Omisha.”
I pursed my lips when she palmed my face.
“Look at me, Cain. Look at me closely. I don’t look like her at all. My hair is red, my eyes are brown, and my body and my face bear no resemblance to her.”
“I know you know my touch doesn’t feel like hers as well.” she tried desperately. “I know in my heart that I am not her. And I know that you know this in your heart too.”
“I don’t have a heart,” I muttered darkly. “You are being delusional.”
The warmth of her palms was not to my liking yet I couldn’t push her off.
“You have a heart,” Anastasia said quietly. “It beats insanely slow but this.” she poked my chest. “It knows that I am not Omisha. Glaring at me or hating me won’t change the truth.”
What am I doing here with her? I should have sent someone else.
“Your denial can’t change fate.” I chuckled sarcastically. “It won’t change the truth.”
Her hands fell by her sides.
“It hurts so much. It’s unbearable, Cain. The sin you have placed on me.” She grabbed my shirt pleadingly. “It tortures me every second. Your words haunt me.”
I gritted my teeth when tears welled up her eyes again.
“What am I supposed to do? Where am I supposed to go now?”
“My magic can heal her physically. It cannot fix the holes in her soul.”
“I’m so scared of everything.” I fisted my hands when she hugged me. I couldn’t do much with her intoxicated state. “You abandoned me now when you held on before and it hurts.” she gasped softly.
“It hurts when it shouldn’t.” her arms tightened around me. “I don’t know how to deal with this anymore and Logan, he scares me. He manhandles me every time.”
I couldn’t have expected any less from him. He knew better what it could do to her yet he forced his ways. He was still the same.
“Did he hurt you?” I murmured in her hair.
“No” Anastasia buried her face in my chest. “I don’t want to go with him, Cain.” Her hands fisted on my back.
“You are not even close to reckoning what that poor soul wants.”
I wasn’t unaware of what Anastasia truly wanted.
Closure and love.
Laurel cared for Anastasia deeply but she kept a distance between them to keep her safe. Anastasia felt this absence more than anything.
She didn’t show it but she was extremely sensitive.
Because she grew up without proper love and family, she learned to put the same wall between people around her to protect herself.
That’s why her soul’s in such a vulnerable condition because she felt her frailties when she saw others.
But I was not the right person. I was not a person at all. I was ruthless and immoral and I wanted her to suffer.
Even if it meant I could get my wing without fail, I was not going to do it.
Not because I held any conscience or entertained the thought that Anastasia might be a different person from Omisha.
I was never going to believe that.
I wanted an upper hand over her transgression. I wanted to clap this back in her face one day that I stood a step ahead over her in stooping so low.
“Get a grip of yourself.” I grabbed her forearms and pushed her back a little. The bandages fell and exposed the fresh wounds. “Don’t get hurt.” Her lips parted in a soft gasp when I kissed her wounds one by one. “Not at all.” I kissed the fading mark on her left wrist.
“Will I die if you get your wing back?” Anastasia asked me innocently.
“You want to live?” I was expecting a quick reply. “Is it that hard to answer?”
Her silence felt heavy for some reason.
“I don’t think so,” Anastasia replied without looking up. “I don’t have anything to live for. No. I don’t care if I live or not,” she extended her left wrist toward me.
Damn you, Einar.
“Do you know what it means to give it back to me?” I wrapped my fingers around her wrist firmly. “You will be dooming the world you were so desperate to save before.”
“I am not her, Cain. I am never going to say otherwise,” Anastasia replied confidently. “And I won’t be dooming anything or anyone. You exist between one and zero, remember?”
I narrowed my eyes at her smile.
“You are more like an anti-hero.” She tapped my chest proudly. “Because you exist between good and evil, you can switch sides. I believe there was a good enough reason if God didn’t interfere with your creation. Your presence is not in vain.”
“Do you even know what you are saying?” I grabbed her waist and pulled her in my body. “I won’t even let you regret this moment later.”
I palmed her head and captured her lips in a hard kiss.
Sly little vixen.
Anastasia whimpered when I dug my fingers in her tender flesh. I kissed her on an impulse but now I couldn’t pull away. She infuriated me to no extent.
How dare she smile like that and spout senseless shit.
She was Omisha and I was not going to let myself forget it no matter how different she acted, appeared, or felt.
“Don’t wish for something you can’t handle,” I whispered huskily against her slightly parted lips. “You wouldn’t want that.”
“No!” She grabbed my face in her palms to prevent me from moving back. Her cheeks flushed further while looking up at me. “Cain! Can you read people’s thoughts?”
“Yes,” I replied curtly.
“Then why aren’t you reading mine?” I grabbed her jaw roughly. “Why can’t you read mine?”
I couldn’t read her thoughts as a repercussion of the curse. But I didn’t need to.
I could read her.
“I want to kiss you again,” Anastasia mumbled dejectedly. “I want to kiss you all the time.” She winced when I increased the pressure in my hold on her jaw. “Cain!”
My lips claimed hers punishingly. I meshed her frame into mine and kissed her deeply. It was already hard enough to restrain myself and she up and said sinful things so innocently.
Bloody hell, she was messing with me badly and I was letting her.
I growled when she undid the buttons of my shirt and let her hands roam over my chest and abdomen.
It was alcohol.
I kept reminding myself that it was alcohol but I couldn’t stop.
Anastasia threw her head back when I kissed my way down her neck and shoulders without sparing an inch.
Snap out of it, damn it.
I cupped her nape firmly and kissed her full on the mouth again. My arm lowered from her waist on her hips. I grunted when Anastasia pushed herself into me when I squeezed her hips.
Her responsiveness was only making things harder and I knew if I didn’t stop now, it would lead to nothing but catastrophe when she would sober up.
Despise this. Despise her. I need to loathe her and scorn everything she does.
Anastasia gasped loudly when I released her lips at last. Her cheeks were beet red and her eyes were hooded and clouded. I unhooked her arms from around my neck and held them firmly in one hand.
“Don’t say things thoughtlessly, Anastasia.” I jerked her when she tried to free her hands. “I don’t intend to fall on the right side ever.” She staggered back a little when I released her hands roughly.
“Cain?” She grabbed my hand and held it against her cheek. “Did you kill Laurel?”
The hope in her innocent eyes grated my nerves.
“Fuck you, Anastasia.” The clouds began to stir in the sky.
Anastasia trembled when a clap of thunder shook the air. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply to constrain my anger.
“You didn’t kill her? My parents too, right?” She stumbled in front of me when I turned away from her. “Cain?” I turned the other way. “Oh, my god! I killed him.”
I looked back when Anastasia started wailing.
“I killed him.” She pointed to the plant she stepped on. “I killed the planet. Oh my, god!” She looked petrified. “I ate the planet. I–” she pushed past me and went back to where she was lounging. “There is nothing left.” She sobbed loudly. “How can I be this cruel?”
“Those are strawberries,” I bemused. “What is this, a picnic?”
“I ordered them because I got hungry” Anastasia moped over the empty box. “Strawberries come from the planet. I ate the planet. What will happen now?” She started wailing again.
“I swear I will kill you or whoever tried to get you drunk again.” I lifted her in my arms. “Stop struggling or I will drop you,” I smirked when it worked and opened the portal.
“But the planet–”
“I will fix your god damned planet, Anastasia. Shut up now.”
“How?” She asked curiously.
“Like this,” I grumbled.
My eyes switched and blue hues rose around us in various patterns. Her eyes lit up with glee when my power seeped into the dead plant and revived it.
“Magic, Cain. You can do magic. You gave back its life.” I grunted when she kissed my cheek.
“Just shut up, you–”
“Wait, my phone” I knelt and she grabbed it from the floor. “Okay,” I stood up and crossed the portal to her room.
“Sleep without making any fuss.” My tolerance was at its limit now.
“But I can’t.” She pointed to herself. “I need to change into my PJs, brush my teeth, wash my face, and I need to put drops in my eyes.”
Damn this vixen.
“Get down.” I snapped. “What are you waiting for?”
“It’s spinning.” Her head rolled back. “I can’t move.” I groaned loudly and carried her to the bathroom. “The PJs” I cringed when she screamed in my ear. “The closet first, dummy.”
“Be glad that you are drunk.” I carried her to the closet and she took out her nightdress without getting out of my arms.
“Don’t leave, okay?” She pouted when I put her back to her feet in the bathroom. “I will get angry if you do.”
I wanted to leave but I was sure she would end up injured one way or the other.
Or worse, she could go out again.
Anastasia emerged from the bathroom after some time. She tied her hair up in a rough bun and changed into a green silk top and shorts.
I ignored the tugs of my carnal urges when I looked at her from head to toe.
“The eye drops,” Anastasia whined. “They are in the vanity drawer.”
I grabbed the medicine and dragged her to the bed. I extended the small bottle toward her but instead of taking it, she kept staring at me.
“Put them in my eyes. Here,” she raised her face a little. “Hurry.”
I palmed her head with one hand and raised the bottle over her right eye.
“Only one drop, okay?” Her hands fisted my shirt when the medicine stung her eye. “Ow!”
“Stop moving,” I put the medicine in her left eye and cradled her face to keep her still.
My gaze moved from her closed eyes to her slightly parted lips and flushed cheeks. I felt parched when my eyes lowered to her neck and rested on her slightly heaving chest.
“Cain?” Anastasia broke my chain of thoughts. “Can I confess something?” She didn’t wait for my reply. “I lied. I didn’t call Angie and Nat.” She whispered secretively. “They are not even here. They have gone back home.”
“I didn’t know the good girl Anastasia lied as well.” I could feel my pupils dilating when she pouted. “What prompted you?”
“I didn’t want to be alone.” She mumbled. “Loneliness isn’t all that great, you know.”
“Why call me?” I glared at her closed eyes.
“I don’t know,” Anastasia whispered. “I just thought of you.” Her hands left my shirt and moved over my chest. “Are you angry?”
I put my index finger on her lips.
“Shut up,” She obliged my command. “Don’t open your eyes, Anastasia.” Her breathing turned uneven when I whispered in her ear. “No matter what.”
I dragged my finger down her lips and traced the length of her neck slowly.
I don’t think I could control it anymore.
“Cain!” Anastasia whispered breathlessly when my fingers teased her cleavage. I undid her hair and angled her head back slightly.
Anastasia was beautiful without a doubt and so pure. Her scent always stirred me.
She was right.
Her essence and touch weren’t like Omisha’s. I never got to touch her in the past and it never compelled me.
But the same was not the case now.
Anastasia affected me in inexplicable ways. I couldn’t control my lust whenever she was alone with me. Her mere sight aroused me toward every vile and wicked thing I could do to her.
I wanted to do to her.
I tangled my fingers in her hair and pulled her face closer. Her hands fisted on my chest when I peppered kisses all over her face.
“Stop!” Anastasia moaned when I kissed the length of her neck and moved up behind her ear.
“And if I don’t?” I pulled the strap down her left shoulder without detaching my mouth from her soft skin.
I wanted to mark every bit of it.
“What will you do?” My eyes feasted on her semi-naked breast. “Will you scream for help?”
She cried out in pleasure when I attacked her soft skin with my tongue and teeth.
“Or will you scream my name?” I kissed her swell feverishly.
“Wait!” Anastasia tugged at my hair.
She writhed in my arms when I fondled and teased her sensitive softness mercilessly.
“Please, Cain.” She gasped when I grabbed her hips to keep her in place. “No, please, no.” Her body convulsed with pleasure when my hand went inside her shorts. “No, stop.”
She might not remember but her body won’t forget this.
“You should have known better before calling me.” I pushed her back on the bed and climbed on top of her. I cupped her jaw and forced her eyes on me. “I am no angel.” I kissed her full on the mouth. “What made you think that I wouldn’t take advantage of this?”
“I don’t care,” I hissed under my breath when she wound her arm around my neck and pulled me close.
Her lips touched mine chastely and she smiled while looking into my eyes.
“It’s not hurting, Cain. You are not hurting me.” I tried getting up but she didn’t let me. “Want to make a bet?” I glared at her cheeky smile. “I will prove to you that I am not Omisha.”
“Good luck with that,” Our noses collided when she pulled me back hard. “You cannot change my mind.”
“I am not tricking you into anything. I am only going to try and make you see.”
Her eyes closed in anticipation when I leaned closer.
“And if you failed to turn your desperate lie into truth?” I murmured in her ear.
“Then you can plunge your blade into me like you claimed.” She replied solemnly. “I won’t complain.”
I refused to believe the sincerity in her eyes.
“Only if you remember this night tomorrow morning,” I fixed her top and removed her arms from my neck. “Your life won’t be the only thing I will be taking, Anastasia.” She pushed herself up on her elbows. “I will take everything, from your heart to your body.”
“Pervert,” She squeaked in embarrassment.
“Who seduced me first?” She averted her eyes shyly when I kissed her forehead. “I won’t pull back next time so think carefully before calling me in such a vulnerable state,” I said wickedly.
“Can’t you stay?” She grabbed my hand when I got up to leave. “Please don’t leave me alone.” I looked at her window. “Cain? What’s wrong?”
“Did you feel something uncanny these past days?” Anastasia thought carefully. I highly doubted her mind could conjure up anything in this state. “Did you come across someone else after that night in the park?”
“No,” she replied after some time. “Shae was always with me. Why?” She tilted her head to the side. “Am I going to be attacked again?”
“If you didn’t leave my side,” I nudged her to lie down and climbed next to her. “I wouldn’t have to deal with this extra mess.”
“Why aren’t you taking me back then?” Her tone was accusatory. “You didn’t try to stop me either. You were so forceful before.”
I cocked one brow in question when she got on top of me.
“I don’t trust you. You are going to leave once I fall asleep.”
“Get off,” I grunted when she whined in response. “Anastasia, get off me.” Her arm tightened around my waist and she shook her head furiously. “Ana!”
“What?” She looked at me surprised. “You called me Ana?” Her eyes lit up. “You called me Ana.” She squealed happily and buried her head in the crook of my neck. “That’s the first step.”
“Shut up,” I growled but she was unfazed.
“What did you like about her?” She asked suddenly. “What made you love her so much?”
“I didn’t love her. She was just a convenience.” Anastasia giggled in response. “What’s so funny?”
“I think I know what might have made you fall in love with her.”
I looked at her when she fell silent suddenly. It didn’t take a minute for her to drift off.
“Talk about guileless,” I murmured in her hair, “and gullible.”
I looked at her window again. They disappeared right when I made my presence visible.
“What a drag!”
I wasn’t worried about Serra. It was what she could do in her crazy fit that troubled me. I couldn’t trust Amon anymore.
“You are coming back,” I brushed her nose with my finger. “By hook or by crook.”