(Sur)real

“Tomorrow, your games end,” Blake growled before he hung up.

The phone fell from my shaking hand and hit the floor with a thud. The Others danced around Jim in a frenzy while I trembled from head to toe. In the shower, it had been fear. On the bed, it had turned into something so much more. At first, I’d only hoped that Jim wouldn’t laugh at my attempts. I didn’t know the first thing about real kissing or foreplay, only the bits I’d overheard the Urbat women say in the center while they watched their young torment me.

I continued to watch Jim and the Others with uncertainty.

“Was that my purpose?” he said, his voice so soft, low, and filled with anger that my shaking intensified. “To be used?”

“Blake was moving toward us. I had to do something to stop him.”

“I understand,” he said. He stood and moved to step around me. I caught his arm and stopped him.

“I don’t think you do. You feel used. I understand that too well. That’s my whole life.”

“And you think being used allows you to use me?” There was no accusation in his tone, but plenty in his words.

“No. Being used has taught me to understand the difference between what I want for myself and what I need to want for a higher purpose. I thought you wanted me for yourself as much as I wanted you. I didn’t mean to use you. ”

He turned and tilted his head as if maybe looking down at me.

“So not just to hurt Blake?”

My chest tightened with guilt.

“No. There were many reasons for what I did. The best one was because I really wanted to touch you and let myself enjoy it just for me.”

He reached up and slipped his hand through the tangle of wet hair hanging from the back of my head. A reminder that I stood in front of him with no clothes.

“Then, thank you,” he said. “For taking what you wanted and for helping me understand.”

He bent his head and brushed his lips against mine, sending a tingle of awareness rushing over my skin. I suppressed my joy at the feel of him. At the feel of his tongue licking the seam of my lips. Of the way my heart pounded as I opened my mouth and experienced the first real kiss of my life.

Just when my control started to break, someone knocked on the door.

Jim pulled back with a groan.

“Under the covers,” he said. “So I can answer the door without killing someone.”

I quickly got under the covers and listened to him accept a tray from the hotel staff.

As soon as the door closed, I left my protection and started for the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” he asked as he set the tray on the table.

“To the bathroom to finish drying off and to get dressed.”

“You don’t have to.” The husky note in his voice sent a shiver through me.

“I do. If we continue, it’ll bring Blake. I’m not ready to face that fight, yet.”

He sighed and went back to laying out the food from the tray.

I smiled and ran the brush through my hair. Dinner with Jim and our time “watching” T.V. still ran through my mind. He never seemed to object to describing things to me. Or just talking. He liked being with me. My stomach did an odd flip at that thought, and I struggled not to feel any guilt over it.

Setting the brush aside, I opened the door. Jim already lay in the bed closest to the exit. The bed we’d used to kiss and I’d used to hide, remained empty. My bed. An empty, lonely one. I sat on the edge of the mattress and looked at him. He had his head turned as if watching me.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “Still hungry?”

I shook my head with a small laugh. I’d eaten everything he’d set in front of me. My stomach hurt, but I didn’t care. After all the times I’d gone hungry, I’d glutted myself.

“I won’t be hungry for days.”

Any humor I felt faded as the words brought what would happen tomorrow back into focus. I moved closer to him.

“I don’t want to sleep by myself. We both know Blake will likely try something, again, and it makes more sense to sleep beside you because of that. But, that’s not why I’m asking. I’m tired of feeling so alone.”

“You’ll never feel that way again. I meant what I said before. You’re mine. We’re just waiting until you decide the time is right.”

He lifted the covers, a silent invitation I didn’t hesitate to accept. I burrowed into his warmth, setting my cheek on his bare chest. His fingers stroked over my hair, a tender comfort as I closed my eyes.

Well done, daughter. You have his heart. Now ask for the rest.

I couldn’t. Instead, I held him close, wanting this last night to be about me.

JIM…

Olivia’s hair tickled my chin and my chest. I didn’t move to scratch the itch, though. I didn’t want to wake her while I basked in our closeness. Five times during the night, she’d woken abruptly to claim my lips in a searing kiss. Twice, she’d climbed on top of me, hip to hip. The last time, she’d moved and nearly killed me.

I hadn’t let her apologize for any of those moments together. She’d explained herself, and I understood. It wouldn’t be long until she and the girls made the Judgement and her need to control Blake would end. I could wait.

Yet, part of me worried about waiting. I understood well enough that my ability to touch her and be with her like this only stemmed from my heartfelt belief that I was meant to help her in some way. Fate, the Lady, whatever, threw us together for a reason. But once the Judgement finished, that reason would be done. Then what? Would I have lost my chance to make Olivia mine? Would I feel crippling pain once more?

Are you awake? Winifred sent me.

I grinned up at the dimly lit ceiling, not missing the irony of thinking of crippling pain while receiving a message from Winifred.

Yes. Olivia is still sleeping, though.

Any trouble?

No. I would have reached out immediately. You?

Everything has been quiet here, for the most part. Gabby woke Sam a few times because of Urbat movement but almost as soon as she spotted it, the movement stopped.

I smoothed my hand over Olivia’s hair in appreciation. She stirred, nuzzling against my bare chest with her nose, mouth, and cheek while her hand roamed over my stomach.

Olivia is waking up now. Send Gabby to rest. Olivia will be able to sense when Blake’s on the move.

Good. Let me know when you leave.

I will.

“Good morning,” I said softly.

Olivia stilled then lifted her head.

“Good morning. Sorry about that.”

I studied her face. She never showed much emotion, but something about her expression seemed more relaxed than I’d ever seen it.

“No apologies. Let’s take what we want from life while we have the chance.”

She nodded slowly, a slight frown pulling at her features. I regretted my words, and wished I could take them back.

“Ready for some breakfast?” I asked lightly.

She smiled and slid from the bed.

“I’ll be ready in a bit.”

While she closed herself in the bathroom, I searched the floor for my discarded shirt then changed into a clean set of clothes. Olivia stepped out with a hint of mint in her scent and a cascade of smooth hair hanging down her back.

I handed her a set of clean clothes, which she accepted with a word of thanks before disappearing into the bathroom again. By the time she reemerged, I had the bags packed and everything ready. I took a quick turn at the bathroom before we headed out.

Not wanting to bring more unhappiness to her expression, I didn’t ask about her back as I helped her into the seat. Instead, I asked what she wanted to eat for breakfast.

“Do you like homemade waffles?” she asked in return. “They were too time consuming to make, so I’ve never had any. The freezer ones I tried were okay, but someone told me the really big ones were better.”

“I love waffles.”

I watched hopefully for signs for a waffle house but had to settle for a chain restaurant that I knew served breakfast food. They thankfully had waffles on the menu.

An hour later, we left with full stomachs and a smile on Olivia’s face. A smile that quickly faded as I started the engine.

She stared out the window as I drove, and I let her have her silence.

We’re on our way, I sent Winifred.

Good. We’ll see you at the park just before noon.

“Blake’s moving,” Olivia said.

“Close? Do we need to stop?”

“No. I think he’s moving toward the park like I said he should. Don’t think for a moment he’s given up, though. Michelle’s visions will come true. He will fight for the Judgement to fall in his favor, likely by trying to kill all the werewolves.”

A heavy weight settled just behind my sternum. We’d called them all to help.

“The Urbat have been looking for each of you in every one of Bethi’s relived lifetimes. They’ve known you girls existed far longer than we have. If they know so much, Blake has to know what killing all the werewolves would mean. That it would bring imbalance and the Others.”

She shook her head.

“The Urbat only care that we are the key to power. Blake and his predecessors have always believed the need for balance between the races was just a story told by desperate people. They’re blind to the truth. And, men with blind ambition will sacrifice anything to achieve their goals.”

The news wasn’t overly surprising. Blake had been trying to reduce our numbers for years. However, I hadn’t forgotten the way the group of Urbat had found and hunted down Mary and Gregory. Of all the werewolves hidden around the states, how had the Urbat found them first?

What if they hadn’t? I opened my mind to feel the links of my people, searching for any that might be missing in the thousands of connections. All the connections were too new to tell, though.

WINIFRED…

Emmitt drove so I could focus on communicating with all the wolves I’d called to our aid. They were coming from far and wide. Several of those who’d fled Europe just before I’d exposed our existence to the world while in New York had already arrived and had reported the park was quiet.

I was just about to communicate that to Sam when Jim interrupted my thoughts.

Winifred, Olivia thinks that Blake will try to kill us all to force the Judgement in his favor.

He’s been trying to kill us all for years and has failed. He will fail again today, I sent.

I know. But humor me for a minute. You know our people. Have any gone missing?

I opened my mind, touching the familiar links. Some new. Some old. I frowned when I reached for one and found it missing. The first of many. Too many. How had this happened? I’d known Blake had quietly hunted Mated pairs in the past and killed families for the female cubs. Why had I assumed that genocidal brutality had ended since revealing ourselves to the world? How had I failed my people yet again? A fist of pain struck me in the chest. I gasped and leaned forward.

Winifred, what is it? Sam sent, more attuned to me than he should be. Yet, at the moment, I grasped his connection like a lifeline. He needed to know. They all did.

Over one hundred werewolves are gone, I sent them. How did we not notice?

If they don’t reach out to us, we wouldn’t know, Grey sent. It’s not your fault or theirs. We underestimated Blake. Warn the rest.

He was right. My failing was in not being vigilant enough. It wouldn’t happen again.

Blake’s men are out there, human and Urbat, silencing our people in hopes of winning. If you see anything suspicious, reach out to us. Go nowhere alone. His attempt to decimate our race ends now.

GREY…

I reached out and touched Gregory’s faint link. He was as much of a brother to me as Thomas. I mourned for him and for all the others I, now too, felt missing. So many links lost but not his. Not yet. Likely soon, though. Just like many more before the sun would set.

“Grey, if you don’t tone it down, I’m going to have to hit someone in the face pretty soon,” Isabelle said from her place in back.

Carlos glanced at me.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Blake’s men have been quietly thinning our numbers. Families. Cubs. More than a hundred gone since we left New York.”

“Bloody hell,” Luke swore from the back.

“It won’t end there. With the call for help we made, many more will die today.” I turned to look back at Bethi.

She leaned against Luke. Because of her high emotions, we’d already had to stop once for Isabelle and Carlos to spar. I knew this news wouldn’t help calm her, but they all needed to know.

“You can’t let them win,” I said.

Bethi snorted and sat up straight. “To save the world, yes we can. We don’t want to. We want to stop him. But, if he tries to wipe out all werewolves, there’s no chance for balance; and the world will burn.”

Isabelle reached over and grabbed Bethi’s hand.

“We’ll just need to make the Judgement before the Urbat get there. You keep visualizing your emotions trapped in a small steel box, and I’ll keep visualizing all the ways I’m going to kick Luke’s ass when we stop next.”

Luke made an annoyed sound.

“Sounds good to me,” Bethi said. She snuggled into Luke’s side and closed her eyes. The scent of her worry immediately faded.