Chapter 5
Innin allowed me to talk to Pili whenever we had to give the horses a rest. I sat on the ground while Pili braided my hair into pigtails, Innin watching us in dismay. Most of the knights had gone to collect firewood, but a few remained to stand guard and set up our small camp for the night. The moment Pili pulled his hands away from my finished hair did Innin throw my cloak’s hood back over my head. I messed with its position until I was able to see in front of me. I was aware of how Innin never took his eyes off me, even if I was talking with Pili, or if he were giving orders to the knights.
I had asked Pili if the knights were treating him alright when the small band of them came stumbling out of the woods with firewood and two rabbits. I dug my hands into the grass at the appearance of the rabbits wiggling their noses. Deep down I knew I had more power than Innin when it came to the knights. I could order them to let the defenseless creatures go, but I also knew that they were going to be our food for the night. I looked away when they killed and skinned them; Pili rested a hand on my knee to act as comfort.
Innin made sure I was given priority in the dividing of the rabbits and in our sleeping arrangements. If it weren’t clear to me that I was of royalty, it was beat into me that first night camping. I had been given the best pieces of the rabbits, the only blanket, and Innin offered me his lap as a pillow. I gave the blanket to Pili, instead using the silk cloak for cover and my own arm to rest my head. Though, Innin tied his tail with mine to make sure I didn’t wander off in the night.
That was our routine for the next few days, and each night I went to sleep, I found myself back in the carriage when I awoke. Innin would give me some bread and water to serve as my breakfast. I counted the days the best I could through our mundane, and with the sixth day I found myself blinking sleep from my eyes in the carriage, we didn’t stop. Innin continued to peak out a sliver in the curtain, looking as worried as ever. When I asked him what the matter was, he told me it was nothing to concern myself with. Sometime after the sun had risen, the carriage came to a slowed stop, Innin making his exit before helping me down the step.
The knights and Pili dismounted their horses and got into a sort of formation around me. Pili came to my side, while Innin walked in front of me, a scabbard now attached to his hip. We walked in unison with my hand clasped in Pili’s, the hood of my cloak thrown over my head and blocking my sight. One by one the knights dispersed before Innin, Pili, and I entered through an opulent door. I removed the hood from my head as we walked brightly colored, garishly over-decorated hallways.
Innin split Pili and me up, assuring me I would see him at dinner as he ushered me into a room. He closed the door, locked it, and told me the maids would be with me soon. I didn’t try to open the locked door, I had a vague feeling I’d tried countless times prior, and each time only suffocated my hope further. The walls were painted a pale blue, with globs of greens and browns in the shapes of trees, and the ceiling was painted white and covered in delicately folded gold in a failed attempt to make the windowless room feel less claustrophobic. I leaned against the door, staring at the chandelier of white crystals, giving the room the light it needed in the absence of the outside.
I folded the cloak and laid it on the soft comforter of the bed, then took to dragging my hand against the walls. I hoped to find the slightest of cracks, an indication of doors or secrets. The only thing I found was a closet, its doorknob protruding from a trunk as if it opened to a mystical place, a mystical place filled with ruffled shirts, embroidered vests and jackets, and differently styled shoes. A wooden chest of drawers held undergarments, socks, trousers, no secrets of its own hidden in the folds of clothing. There was a yellow cushioned chair by a wooden bookshelf. I grabbed a book at random, flipped open the cover to find the words For Ezollen, Love Mommy scrawled in ink. I slid another from its place to find the same message written in a different hand. I didn’t need to pull all of the books filling the shelves to realize they would all hold the same letters formed by different hands.
I took to pacing the empty space until the maids arrived. I felt if I stopped moving my resolve would leave me. That I would crawl into the soft bed and never leave, never try to convince my mother to let me travel. The maids stopped my steps with their slight knock before appearing in the room. They undressed me with a dizzying swiftness, I was only aware it had happened when I was left standing there in my undershirt and knickers. They wasted no time in dressing me in a gaudy orange formal outfit of trousers that went down to my knees, a bland vest, and jacket whose sleeves allowed the ruffles of my undershirt to poke out. They finished with rubbing a rose scented perfume on the sides of my neck by my ears.
Innin came to collect me, the heels of my shoes clacking on the marble tiled floor as he led me by the hand. I only noticed he hadn’t changed his own clothes before I tilted my head down, stared at the white socks whose hems were hidden underneath my trousers. I didn’t want Innin to leave, to let go of my hand when we came to a stop in front of large double doors painted with gold vines. I wanted someone who knew what was going on in the room with me, but he told me it was just dinner when I raised my quiet concerns.
I sat in a chair close to the head of the table, picking at my fingernails. Knights guarded each doorway, I couldn’t leave even if I wanted to. I brought my head up at the sound of a door opening, expecting to see anyone but Pili walk in. He had pulled as much of his short hair as he could back, now adorned in mismatched colors of clothes similar to mine. He looked uncomfortable as he took the empty seat diagonal from me.
“Are…you alright?” I asked, fingering the edge of the tablecloth. “They’re not…treating you badly because you’re an Aeces, are they?”
“I’m fine,” he said. “Innin?” I nodded in his pause. “He promised me that my protection is absolute while I’m your guest.”
The door opened once more, and we turned our heads to watch a woman gripping Innin’s arm enter. They walked side-by-side to the highbacked chair at the head of the table where he pulled it out for her. She kept her hand in his, running her free hand over the chair as she walked in front of it, letting go to tuck her peach skirt under her as she sat. Milky eyes, horns curling around and under her ears; Innin whispered something to her as he pushed her in her chair. She nodded, patted his cheek, and he took his leave. I could only assume she was my mother.
“Ezollen,” she said, raising a hand in the air, only lowering it when a servant placed cups in front of us. “How was the Port?”
“It was…fine.” She turned to face me at the sound of my clipped voice. I looked down at the weight of her blind gaze to see hands place silver cutlery and a silver plate filled with rice and lamb covered in a fragrant sauce in front of me, a smaller plate filled with vegetables soon followed.
She felt around the table for her napkin, unfurling it to lay it across her lap. “I’m glad you had fun.” She picked up her knife and fork. “Innin has informed me there’s something you wish to talk to me about?” She didn’t let me get a sound out before continuing, cutting her lamb into smaller pieces. “We can discuss it tomorrow, and if not then, then after the Blue Moon Beautillion.” I glanced at Pili, who had been staring at me, waiting for me to pick up my cutlery with shaky hands to follow my lead. “How is our guest?”
Pili swallowed the food he’d finally been able to get to his mouth after mimicking my fork use. “I’m grateful for the hospitality from Ez—Prince Ezollen, Your Majesty.”
My mother wiped at her mouth, muttering just loud enough for me to hear, “An Aeces with manners, how did you find this one, Ezollen?” She cleared her throat, and I gripped my knife in mild anger. “A friend of my son is always welcome.” I lost what little appetite I may have had with the snake-like bite she said those words.