Skinned

Valerie

The sky harbored the dominant color of grey, dark clouds hovering over the land of our pack as I waited for the rain to saturate the dry ground.

The trees were enveloped by the thickening fog as they swayed from the cold wind, its rustling lullaby bringing comfort to my ears.

Dark,

Quiet,

And tranquil,

It was nature in its gloom.

With one last look at the scenery, I stepped away from the window and dropped the curtains, setting my bedroom to darken once again.

My feed padded along the cold wooden floor as I made my way to the bathroom and turned on the lights to face myself in the mirror.

I had been stuck inside my home for almost a week, isolating myself from the werewolves that witnessed me at my worst, and I had spent the rest of my time gathering what belief I have left of myself.

The lashes were meant to land on my skin, to spill blood for the payment of my wrong, but it felt like it reached a place that had no chances of recovery, and it landed its mark on my mind. Engraving a word that brought weakness to the way I carried myself,

Shame.

With eyes set straight in the mirror, I began to undo the buttons of my shirt before discarding it to the floor, and I was greeted by the sight of the bandages wrapped tightly around my torso, the mere sight of it forcing my jaw to set tight.

I reached for the scissors settled on the sink and began to cut off the confining material.

As soon as the bandages had loosened and landed on the floor, I shifted behind to look at my wounds, only to find out that they had been replaced by light pink scars.

My features morphed to become grim, fingers coming up to trace the rough lines that covered my back as I faced the permanent mark of betrayal on my skin.

It was a known fact that wounds done by silvers should take a month to fully heal for werewolves, and to find my wounds completely recovered within a few days, closed up and void of pain, made a sound point that something was not right with me.

As if the sight of the scars alone brought bile to my throat, I turned my eyes away from my back and discarded the rest of my clothes before stepping into the shower.

My hand reached down for the faucet before turning it on, but as I allowed the water to run over my body, I was bombarded by a sensation that rendered me rigid. It was a wave of heat travelling throughout my body, and its sudden onslaught had me hopelessly clinging to the walls.

Deep,

Confining,

Coiling itself tightly around my muscles, it was digging hard into every crevice beneath my skin, leaving me shaken as I fought hard to even out my breath.

With a pained groan, I raised a heavy hand to settle it against my flushed flesh, letting it knead, press, and skim my stiff joints in hopes of relieving the tension building up within.

Yet the burn refused to cease.

The running water was cold, freezing even, but it wasn’t enough to put out the growing scorch felt beneath my skin.

It was unforgiving.

My body felt like a furnace that harbored a fire refusing to perish, and it was rendering my body weak and lacking of strength.

After an hour of standing underneath the cold running water, the pain had subsided and turned into an undying warmth sitting beneath my skin.

I stepped out of the shower with movements kept slow, not making any effort to dry myself off as I went straight to my closet and began to rummage for my clothes.

I was donned in my jeans and sweater when I sat at the edge of the bed to slip on my ankle boots. Standing up in my full height, I took the white coat settled on the chair and stepped out of the house to begin my short tread over to the infirmary to start my regular day of work.

I could feel the eyes of males and females following my path as I passed them by, the weight of their judgement forcing me to grit my teeth and quicken the pace of my walk, but no matter how fast I tried to outrun them, it was not enough to stop my feet from leaving my dirty trail of insecurities.

“Valerie!” someone called out, and I simply ignored it as my movements refused to halt to regard the person approaching me, all too eager to escape the attention being brought upon my emergence.

I could hear steps nearing behind my figure, and I looked over my shoulder to see Heath with a small smile on his face, his expression all too welcoming that everyone would have thought that we were close friends.

But I couldn’t help but think that we actually were.

I was surrounded by pack members that refused to involve themselves with me, yet Heath had always been present to support my schemes and stay genuine to his promises. Not once did he break our deal, nor spoke about it to anyone else.

He was a good keeper.

What was spoken between us, stayed solely between us, and it was something that even Emma had trouble trying to do.

“Beta Heath,” I greeted as he managed to walk along side of me.

“Let’s stick with Heath, shall we?” he said, “I’m trying to be as humble as possible.”

“If you say so, Heath,” I smiled.

“I’m surprised that you’re up and walking again. After seeing you that night, I just,” he shook his head, laughing to himself as he kept his eyes on the path ahead of us, “I didn’t think you’d recover from it so fast.”

“It’s not completely healed actually,” I lied, “I figured that the pain wouldn’t be bad enough to stop me from doing my job. A lot of people still need me.”

“Aren’t you just benevolent?” Heath rolled his eyes.

“So, why did you do it?” I questioned him, changing the subject.

“Do what?”

“Challenge your brother for a title you don’t even want.”

“I know my brother, Valerie, and if there’s one thing that Reed wants at the moment then it’s having Killian’s throat in his hand,” Heath smiled, one that looked distant as he kept his eyes ahead of him, “So, to stop that idiot’s ambitions and save him from his own undoing, I just had to take his place.”

As Heath and I were walking, I spotted a tall crimson haired female standing outside a cabin.

Surrounded by adoring women of similar strength, Celeste stood with her arms crossed over her chest. As if she still wore the crown that proved her power over the pack members, she stood with her back set straight and her head held high as she harbored her undying confidence.

She was still beautiful. Her porcelain skin was left flush and vibrant from the cold nipping air, but her hair was no longer swept to one side of her shoulder. She was no longer parading the mark of her king, hiding it from everyone’s eyes as she let her voluptuous hair free and covering the rest of her neck.

Celeste was wearing a smile on her face as she spoke with her females, but as soon as her eyes shifted to meet my gaze, her expression changed to regard me with her icy glare. She pressed her lips firmly together and locked her jaw tight as she watched Heath and I pass by, and her attention was soon followed by her group of females.

“What happened to Azeil?” I questioned, and turned my head over to Heath to avoid Celeste’s hateful eyes.

“Bedridden,” he said with a face that wore no concern, and he answered me as if he was talking about something as casual as the day’s weather.

“He can’t feel anything from the neck down after Killian had him by the neck.”

“Will he recover?”

Heath let out a laugh, one that contained his cruel humor before shaking his head in reply, “I could care less, Sweetie. We’ll leave that one for the Moon to decide, but I sure hope he doesn’t; we have enough dipshits to deal with in this pack.”

“Beta Heath,” A young male called out from afar as he began jogging over to us.

The male was covered in sweat, his breathing ragged as he made an effort to speak once again, “Two rogues tried to cross the Eastern border just a few minutes ago.”

Heath sighed and turned to me, “I’m gonna go and handle that. I’ll see you around, Valerie.”

“Of course,” I grinned and continued my walk alone.

“Timothy, please be careful! Don’t get too close to the Alpha’s house, it’s not safe!” A female shouted for her pup to hear, as she stood at the threshold of her den with her hands on her hips.

Killian would never harm a pup.

I clenched my jaw and met her eyes, as if her words alone had offended me, and I looked over at the small male running over to his group of friends huddled up from afar.

I shook my head as I tried to shake off my annoyance, but my movements had immediately came to a halt when I heard something hit the ground followed by a woman’s shout.

Looking over my shoulder, I saw the same pup laying on the ground, but what caught his mother dreadful the most was Killian standing at the porch of his home with a face void of emotion.

Clad in an old navy blue jeans and a grey shirt sticking to the expanse of his chest and the fullness of his arms, Killian stood tall like the Alpha he was. His dark hair was quick to grow, curling on top of his head with the sides neatly cut short.

He looked good.

Slowly, he let his feet take him to the pup, but as soon as Killian neared his approach, the pup released a whimper and crawled farther away from him in fear, forcing him to quickly draw his hand back with an expression that harbored his hurt.

Instead of being respected by werewolves after putting down an Alpha of greed, Killian had ended up with a stained image, turning into an instrument of every pup’s nightmare as their parents’ words brought them fear of falling underneath the mercy of his teeth.

The female frantically came up to take her pup while avoiding Killian’s gaze, and I watched as he stayed rooted to the ground with a tense figure.

From the pack’s words twisted and built to form a false story, painted an image of Killian as a monster meant for chaos, his canvas stained only by the color of black and red.

He thought that the werewolves had every right to be afraid of him.

The muscles on his jaw worked as he casted his eyes down, his hate for himself strong enough that it could reach me. With a deep breath in and a deep breath out, his gaze went up to acknowledge me.

For a moment, his inner turmoil had silenced, replaced by a pleading hope that I could never be able to reciprocate.

Suddenly feeling fevered yet again, I shifted my eyes away from his consuming pull before proceeding my way over to the infirmary.

As soon as I opened the door, I released a sigh after being surrounded by the silence of the room.

Emma’s absence had taken the life out of the infirmary. There was no one to welcome me anymore. The lights were off, setting the area to darken as the faint smell of disinfectant and cheap air freshener met my senses.

Entering my office, I fell into the cushioned seat in front of my desk and leaned back to wait for the wave of heat to make its leave.

I hissed and brought a hand up to my neck, thighs pressing together as my body began to writhe from the recurring burn.

“I knew I’d find you here.”

I jolted up on my seat with a yelp and looked up to see Maliha with her arms folded above her chest, her light yellow hair was set straight and landed smoothly behind her back as she let her eerie eyes consume the rest of me.

“You scared me,” I laughed to myself before fixing myself up on my seat.

“I thought we agreed that you won’t be leaving your house for two weeks.”

“House arrest just isn’t my thing,” I grinned at the female.

Maliha’s features remained calm, yet I knew very well that she was itching to flash her teeth. Her smile was wavering and she decided to make her way over to the frame the held the picture of my mother.

I landed a tight grip on the edge of my desk and cleared my throat as I fought against the ceaseless burn, “I don’t see why you have to make it your priority to keep an eye on me. I’m fine now, the wounds are perfectly healed.”

Maliha looked at me over her shoulder and smiled, her eyes running over my body with a knowing look on her face.

“Your scent is beginning to shift, Valerie,” she said, taking the picture of my mother to observe it.

“What do you mean?” I glared at her, and I suddenly felt all the humor slip out of me.

“You look just like Elizabeth,” she said, completely ignoring my question.

“Maliha,” I bit out a warning as dread began to rush through me, “What do you mean?”

Maliha made an approach and placed my mother’s picture on my desk before casting her eyes down to regard me.

“When was your last heat, Valerie?”

My breathing came to a stop, trying my best to process her question as I felt the colors begin to drain out of my face.

“You can’t be serious.”

It was impossible. I had disposed of that chance the moment I began to medicate myself, but no matter how much I wanted to deny it, I knew very well that Maliha was pointing out the truth.

She never lied.

My body had suddenly grown immune from the effects of the antiserum; I had no longer had an escape route.

I couldn’t outrun the wolf anymore.

“The Moon has her way with us, doesn’t she?” Maliha let her eyes look through the window and grinned.

“Don’t give me that bullshit,” I snarled and stood up from my seat to acknowledge her completely.

“Do I look like I am?” Maliha’s face darkened as she looked up at me, her figure almost appearing feeble compared to my height towering over hers.

“Tell me how to stop it,” I said, not holding back the pressure of my words as I remained seething in front of the healer.

“You can’t, and I will not assist on stopping what nature has built us to do. There are females out there pleading to the Moon for a child they can’t have, and you should be thankful that you’re given the ability to bear a future. Barren females would cry their prayer for your gift, Valerie.”

“Then I guess the Moon is a fool for giving her gift to those who don’t want it, don’t you think?” I retorted, malice lacing my words as I added flame to the healer’s wrath.

Maliha’s jaw was set tight as she took a step back and looked at me as if I was an abomination.

“You watch what you say, Valerie,” she said, her lips curling back to reveal a flash of teeth, “You’re defying someone that is beyond what you are. One day you will cross her patience and you will meet her wrath, she doesn’t take kindly to a wolf that does not harbor any love for her gift.”

“You face this matter on your own,” Maliha said, her words leaving no room for any of my arguments as she turned around to leave my office.

“I can’t deal with this, please, not right now,” I pleaded, “I need it to stop.”

Pausing at the threshold of the room, Maliha looked at me over her shoulder, “You have a week before your heat reaches its full extent, I hope you will stand prepared for it.”

With a finish to her words, she left me without an escape to the havoc that I had long been running from, dreading what was about to come.

But as the silence consumed the entirety of my office, I could hear deep within myself, was the wild starting to take its first breath of a life that it had been deprived with.