Shattered Hearts A MFM Love Story

~ ~ Maddy ~ ~

Standing in the middle of my bedroom, I ignored the loud knocking in my chest and with one hand on my hip, the other wrapped around the nape of my neck, I tried to make sense of the chaos inside my alcohol-fueled brain.

What the hell had I done?

What had I invited?

The utter recklessness of it made little sense to me. I shouldn’t have said those things. And now I wasn’t ready.

But ready for what? Jackson had clearly stated this wasn’t sex, sex. ′Let us love you,′ he said.

What did that even mean?

Squeezing my eyes shut, I’d stupidly let that woman get inside my head. Taunt me into thinking I wouldn’t be good enough. And maybe I wasn't.

But now it was too late. I couldn’t back out, I at least owed it to them to try. Didn’t I? Maybe?

Ugh!

On the plus side, the alcohol had dulled my anxiety, although I wasn’t sure that was a good thing.

God, I wished I could call up my therapist right about now and talk this through with her. My phone lit up with an alert. Walking toward the dresser, Riley Jo’s name flashed across the screen.

Swiping the screen. Pick you up at 11. The message read.

Riley Jo would listen. Pressing the phone to my ear, I waited to hear her familiar voice.

“Hey... you didn’t need to call me.” Yawning. “You're on a date!”

Huffing. “Was.”

Now wide awake. “What—over already?”

My shoulders sagged.

“Spit it out. What happened?”

I quickly rattled off the night’s events and by the time I was done talking, I’d gravitated to the bed, sitting down. My eyes flicked between the door and the window, half expecting Logan and Jackson to appear.

“Someone needs to put a leash on that bitch,” she bristled, but then her tone changed, lowering a little. “But tell me sumthin’. How sexy was it watching Jackson dish out an ass-whoopin’?”

A smile teased my lips. It had been hot as hell watching him stand up for me. Schooling that poor excuse for a man. It stirred up feelings I wasn’t familiar with.

But here was the hard part. “Anyway, long story short. I think they want to have sex with me.” Gulping. “Tonight.”

Riley Jo sucked in a surprised breath.

Adding, “—but not real sex, actual sex.”

I swore I heard Riley Jo’s smile through the phone. “Actual sex? Real sex?” she repeated.

Yeah, I sounded dumb as a post. “Hmm, I think they meant—you know... like...” Gods, this was embarrassing as I fluffed up the words trying to get them out.

“Let me help you out, sis. I think you’re trying to say oral sex!?” she said bluntly. “Am I right?”

“I don’t know—I guess, maybe, yeah?” Neither hadn’t exactly been clear.

Riley Jo let out a long whistle. “However you look at it, it means y’all getting naked and a lot of exploring goin’ on.”

I gulped. Naked. I’d not thought that far ahead.

“So,” she giggled. “If y’all ain’t gonna be playin’ hide the salami—what’s the problem?”

Spluttering. “Hide the what now!?” This conversation was getting crazier by the second.

“You need me to give you the birds and the bees talk?” she hummed out, obviously enjoying this a little too much for my liking.

“No. I think I got it.”

“Well good. Because the way I see it. Your problem is with intercourse, right?”

“Yeah.”

“And you ain’t gonna be doing that, right?”

“Yeah!” I said, unable to hide my frustration.

“So don’t overthink it. Enjoy whatever those fine men have planned for you.” She giggled again. “Just lie back and think of Texas.”

Was it that simple?

“—But” she started.

Here it comes...

“If it’s too much, then the way I see it. You have two choices.”

Two?

She carried on. “Either tell them you’ve changed your mind. Or climb out the window and most likely break your neck.” She laughed. “Problem solved.”

My sister had a weird sense of humour. And as scared as I was, I wasn’t sure I wanted to change my mind and definitely not risk breaking my neck.

I had something to prove. To myself and to them.

“Any more problems you need me to solve?” she sang out. “World peace?”

I rolled my eyes. But her question led me to another issue I’d tried not to think about. “What if I can’t handle two guys?”

I hadn’t handled one.

“Maddy, you know my thoughts on that—two men showering you with all that attention.” She sighed whimsically. “Damn! Sounds pretty darn good to me.”

I thought about what she’d said, the speaker went quiet for a few beats and I heard muffled voices and then Riley Jo was back.

“Everything okay?” I asked.

“Yea. Just Adam getting a little jealous thinking he ain’t enough man for me.” She let out a low, dirty chuckle.

“Oh gods, Riley Jo. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause trouble.”

“Heck no. It’s good to keep him on his toes.” I heard a squeal from her end and more muffled whispers, and then she was back again and I didn’t want to ask what was happening at her end. Most likely, Adam was teasing her.

My last concern was itching to come out, but I suddenly felt uncomfortable having this conversation even though I was the one to call her.

“I can hear your mind churning from here. What is it?”

Damn. She knew me too well.

“The women they’ve dated and slept with were beautiful and...experienced." Not to mention sexy.

“Maddy Lockwood! Do I need to get in my car and come over and spank your ass?”

“What—why!?”

“You are beautiful. So damn beautiful you dull everything else around you.”

That wasn’t exactly what I was trying to get at. I tried again. “I meant more womanly...like you are.”

“Pfft, what’s wrong with you? I’d kill for your legs and those perky breasts that allow you to go without a bra. Heck. I’m so jealous I’m surprised my skin tone ain’t green by now!”

She was jealous of me? I’d spent my life wishing I was her. “You’re perfect Riley Jo.”

She scoffed. “Look, sexy ain’t defined by how big your breasts are, or how round your ass is.” Inserting a breath. “It’s about confidence and being with the right person.” She added more softly. “I’ve come to terms with my body and since meeting Adam and the way he looks at me. Hell, I know he loves what he sees.” She sighed. “But this isn’t about me. It’s ’bout you and I can tell you right now. I’ve seen the way those two men look at you. And I can tell you for a fact—they like what they see.”

Thinking about what she’d said. She was right...again. I shouldn’t let another person who most likely hates me anyway, make me feel bad about myself.

“Look, I gotta go because my husband wants to show me how one man is more than enough for me to handle.”

It was my turn to laugh.

“Pick you tomorrow and I want all the deets—you hear me?”

“I hear you.” I smiled despite myself.

“And Maddy...one last thing.”

“Yeah?”

“Feel the fear, but do it anyway. Oh, and I love you.”

“Thanks, Riley Jo. Love you too.”

No sooner had I put the phone down, I heard a noise.

They were coming.

Time had run out.

And my tummy was flip-flopping like a fish out of water.

I stood up, and walked to the middle of the room, smoothing out my dress and then my hair.

Quit it. They ain’t here to inspect how you look.

No. They want to undress you.

I gulped and my hands became clammy.

Footsteps came to a stop outside my door followed by a rap of knuckles. “It’s open,” I chirped like some annoying bird, one of those that woke everyone up in the morning.

The door opened, and they filled out my doorway.

“Okay to come in Princess?” asked Logan and my eyes batted between them and there was no missing Jackson’s lips curved into a razor-sharp smile.

I nodded, and they stepped inside, shutting the door behind them.

“You still okay with what I said?” Jackson studied my reaction as if he was sure I was going to back out.

“I’ve not changed my mind, if that’s what you’re askin’?”

I just hoped I wasn’t about to make the biggest fool out of myself.

Heavy, booted footsteps crossed the room. Logan a step ahead. “If you feel uncomfortable or we do something you don’t like, then just say stop and we will. No Questions. No hesitation. Okay?”

The knot in my stomach I hadn’t realised was there, unravelled just a little.

I could do this. Be confident, like Riley Jo had said.

Easier said than done.

“Tonight’s all about you,” reassured Jackson.

I stared at them both and it struck me again by how handsome they both were. Within touching distance, my eyes greedily washed over their bodies. Their powerful physiques with broad shoulders and tapered waists, running down to strong, thick thighs. Both had my mouth watering, itching to trace what lay beneath their clothes, with my fingers... my lips.

I couldn’t imagine feeling the same for anyone else.

And Riley Jo was right. I was darn lucky. They’d never given up on me.

I inhaled a long, slow breath. Time to kick-start this show. “Well, y’all just gonna stand there?”

“Are you sassin’ us, Maddy Lockwood?” Jackson’s top lip curved into a full smile, showing off his straight white teeth and Logan shook his head in amusement.

I popped my hand onto my waist and cocked my head. “Well, I don’t know Jackson Reilly—was you all talk earlier?”

Both their jaws dropped and it was nice to see I could shock them.

Who the hell was I?

Then Jackson was moving rapidly without finesse, and my hands dropped to my sides as his big, warm hands cupped my face and froze me in place. “Does this look like I’m all talk to you, baby?”

I sucked in a breath. Staring into his grey eyes and held within their depths was a swirling mass of emotions. Adoration entangled with apprehension. Excitement cautioned with nervousness.

Jackson nervous? What the hell did he have to be nervous about? And maybe it was the alcohol or the look staring back at me, but it gave my confidence a little boost. “I trust you, Jackson. I trust you both.”

I could do this. They would never hurt me or force me to do anything I didn’t want to.

His gaze dropped to my lips, and desire tightened my body.

“You hold all the power here. Me and Logan are yours. We’ve always been yours,” he said in a low, seductive voice.

How’s a girl supposed to deny them anything, when they said words like that?

And how long had it been that I’d liked them? Felt like forever. Ever since I was an awkward teenager watching them go about their business. Always so self-assured with Jackson being the lighthearted of the pair.

Flames leaked over my neck and they were waiting for me to make the first move. To prove to them I wanted this. Just as much as they did.

I could do this.

I rose on my tippy-toes, closing the gap between us to skim my lips against his. A tease. A promise.

His hand moved down around my waist and all the fine hairs on my body rose. My boldness set off a flare inside me. Desire rushed across my skin and made my heart beat faster.

Jackson’s lips parted, and he flicked his tongue between my lips. I returned a tentative swipe of my soft tongue against his to pull a groan from deep inside his chest.

I moved my hands to dig my fingertips into his chest muscles still covered by the thick material of his tee-shirt, surrendering to his kiss with want and need expanding in my chest... my belly... between my thighs. It was almost as if my body had flipped its switch.

He bit down gently and dragged his teeth along my soft bottom lip, and I returned with a sigh and a shiver of pleasure, kicking my heartbeat up into an unsteady rhythm.

“Maddy,” he sighed. “You taste so damn sweet,” murmuring against my lips, our breaths mingling, breaths quickening.

And then I felt the press of another heated body as Logan moved behind me, shifting my hair as his fingers brushed over my nape and a cool spray of air caressed my skin before a lick of wet heat ran up the side of my neck in a hum of male satisfaction.

Another shiver and Jackson concentrated our kiss with a slow, deep exploration of my mouth as if it was the first time he was tasting me.

Logan’s hands rested on my hips, his fingers digging into my flesh, possessively fetching us closer, pressing his erection into my ass.

I would have gasped if my mouth wasn’t being thoroughly kissed.

And Riley Jo was right. Attention from two mouths, two pairs of hands was...

Oh, my...

Heaven.

Capturing a breath, Jackson's lips feathered mine as Logan continued to splash open-mouthed kisses on the exposed skin of my neck moving up to my ear. “We want to undress you, Princess,” he whispered.

It wasn’t a request or a warning, simply a reminder of where this was leading and my cheeks heated and tiny electric shocks pinged across my entire body.

I could do this, remembering they’d already had a preview that night in the barn.

Feel the fear, but do it anyway.

“Do it,” my breathless command set them in motion. Jackson moved back and his eyes looked over my shoulder at his brother and with a quick nod, it was Logan’s hands that moved over my back and teased down the zip.

The night was warm but the air on my heated skin was still cooler as my dress left my shoulders, teased down my arms by Logan’s hands and passed over my hands, his large fingers twined around my slender ones, pressing a soft kiss to my shoulder as the material slipped over my hips and swan around my ankles.

Jackson dropped to his knees and lifted my left foot, freeing it from my shoe, and then the right. His head looked up, our eyes meeting as his fingers ran up behind my ankles and up over my calves.

I expected him to rise to his feet, but he just glanced up at me with so much heat in his eyes it stopped the air in my lungs from doing its job.

“You’re so goddamn beautiful Maddy Lockwood.” There was a slight tremor to his voice as his Adam’s apple slowly shifted. “I’m not even sure I deserve you,” he said.

He didn’t deserve me? Was he kidding me?

My breath hitched. “I think you’re confused Jackson Reilly, because I don’t know what I did right to have you looking at me like you are right now.”

His hands continued in an upward line, cupping my ass. Rising but still on his knees, his lips moved over my belly as I sucked in a breath and giggled.

It forced his eyes back to mine, his smile brighter than any day I’d woken up to.

“I think it’s about time y’all got undressed too.” I wanted them every bit as exposed as I felt.

Logan groaned behind me and gently nipped on my skin before moving to stand in front of me. Jackson rose as they now stood shoulder to shoulder.

“Only fair, I’m guessing,” Logan said, his smile just as dangerous as Jackson’s.

And quick as you like, Jackson was reaching behind his neck to yank off his tee-shirt and Logan’s fingers were working through each button on his shirt.

It greeted me with two smooth-walled muscled chests.

And then it seemed to be a competition to see who could rid themselves of their pants first. Both whipping off their boots, with Logan yanking on his belt buckle so hard I thought he might break it and the sound of Jackson’s zipper was really loud.

It was a draw as both pairs of jeans were tossed aside, along with their socks. And now the three of us were standing in the middle of the room in our underwear.

And oh, my...

Biting on my lip, I dared to glance down. Now, I’d seen a dick before. Only Coopers mind you. But the way Logan and Jackson’s outlined their tight-fitting boxers briefs.

Oh. My. Lord and I could only gape in surprise.

It appeared God did not make all men equal, and I’d been short-changed by Cooper Stanton.

I swallowed, hard and my stomach practically launched itself into my throat. If I couldn’t handle a bite-size dick. How the hell would I manage a burger deluxe?

And not one—but two?

A body flush ran right over me, making me feel a little woozy.

“Everything okay, Princess?” asked Logan with a twinge of unease grazing his features.

I giggled nervously. “Yeah,” I squeaked. “I’m good.”

“Are you sure?” His eyebrows rose. “Because you’re staring at us.”

Oh god. They’d totally caught me checking out their—

He interrupted my thoughts. “—Like you’re ’bout to run out the door screaming,” he finished.

I gave my head a little wobble and forced my eyes anywhere but there... at least I didn’t have to worry about it tonight.

Baby-steps.

“Are you scared?” asked Jackson.

I shook my head. “Just nervous is all...Butterflies.”

“Butterflies, that don’t sound too bad, right?”

“Yeah, I think so,” my voice was barely above a squeak.

In sync, they closed the space between us and shared a look. It was Logan who swept me off my feet and walked me to the bed, laying me gently on the soft mattress.

Feel the fear, but do it anyway. Feel the fear, but do it anyway.

I wet my lower lip, repeating the mantra.

“You lie there and relax, Princess,” Logan leaned in a licked across the seam of my lips. And then the bed dipped under their combined weight as they planted themselves on either side of me, their body heat both comforting and arousing.

And their smell, spicy masculine cologne, had my body clenching in anticipation.

“How does this work?” I was suddenly curious. “I mean, do you take turns or something?”

They both let out deep chuckles.

“No, baby,” Jackson said, moving closer. “All tonight is about helping you relax. But I’ll warn you right now. There’s gonna be a hella-of-a-lot of kissing and touching."

Touching. And my confidence went up in smoke.

“Hey,” Jackson placed his finger under my chin. “Nothing you can’t handle.”

“And remember,” started Logan, rubbing his nose into my hair. “Tell us to stop if it gets too much.”

I could do this. “I’m good, honestly.” My eyes flitted between them.

“You know—” Jackson pressed a kiss to my temple, “—we think you’re perfect, right?”

They were both being so damn sweet and patient with me.

What did I ever do to deserve them?

Logan’s hand came to rest on my jaw, his fingers lightly tracing my pulse and my mind scattered in a hundred new directions, as he turned my face toward his, I met his grey heavy gaze. He placed a soft kiss on my lips and then another.

His body pushed against mine with urgency now. His hand latched around my waist and I surrendered as he drank me down like I was his favourite whiskey. Kissing me until I was almost mindless.

And slowly I relaxed.

“So soft. So beautiful,” I heard Jackson as his finger ran across my collarbone, outward and then down along the side of my breast, down to my tummy and skirted the hem of my panties.

I shivered, and my heartbeat hammered.

“Just close your eyes,” Logan whispered. “We’re gonna take real good care of you.”

His voice was almost hypnotic and my eyelids suddenly so heavy that I almost felt drunk, fluttered closed.

I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I knew I wanted this.

Wanted them.