Shadows Of Desire

Some believe that, from the moment we are born, our lives are set on a particular path and that the path of a person’s life is predetermined. Even before birth, our fates are sealed and no matter what we do, what choices we make, or how hard we try to change our fate, it can not be unwritten. All roads lead to the same destination and we are helpless to change what was meant to be. Some call this destiny. Others call it the will of the Gods. Rowan called it a curse. That’s what his life felt like to him, a curse, and one which he could never break.

All of his plans to have a happy life with Thaden and Tally, their small cottage in Pickaway village, his happy little family. It all seemed like a dream now. A wonderful dream that he never wanted to be awakened from. But, he was awake now, and his dream had turned into a nightmare. He was back, back where it all started. Back to the one place he had tried to escape. He was back in Basmorte, terrified and alone, and certain that the next few moments would be his last.

Queen Caroline stared down at Rowan, who had been forced to his knees in front of her, and scowled. Caroline hated Rowan. He had always known that and he was no stranger to her cruel taunts or physical punishments that she had regularly inflicted on him but, the look in her eyes now was something new. It was cold and piercing, wicked and full of wrath. She hated him, but this look went beyond hate, this look was murderous.

“I don’t know how you did it, or who helped you, but mark my words boy. I will hunt down all who aided you in this deception and I will have their heads.”

“No one aided me.” Rowan lied, locking eyes with Caroline as he sneered up at her. “I knew that you and Emilia had planned to poison me and so, I simply switched the tincture. The potion I actually drank that night was a little less fatal than what you would have had me drink. When I awoke, I slipped out of the crypt, stole a horse, and left Basmorte. It wasn’t that hard to slip past the guards. They thought I was dead so no one was looking for me. Besides, it’s not like I haven’t done it before.”

Caroline raised an eyebrow questioningly.

Rowan chuckled. “Surely you’ve heard of my escape attempt when I was a child. The guards found me on some farm outside the city walls. I’d fallen asleep in one of the animal stalls. I learned from my mistake though and this time I didn’t stop until I’d made it just outside of Rosegate. I figured once I had made it to the elven city, I’d be less likely to be recognized by anyone.”

Caroline sat back in the throne, her expression stoic. She began to drum her fingers on the arm of the throne as she listened to his explanation, carefully studying him for any sign of deception. Caroline pursed her lips. Her fingers stopped drumming then slowly she dragged her nails along the wood of the armrest. Rowan cringed at the scraping sound her nails made against the wood and the tense, tightening of her jaw as she glared at him.

“Do you think this is all a game?” She hissed at him. “Do you think I am amused by your antics?”

“No.” Rowan growled in response, his voice becoming low and dangerous. For a moment the Queen seemed slightly surprised that Rowan would speak back to her with such defiance but that surprise quickly vanished when she met his eyes. There was nothing playful in his eyes, nothing of the brat child she had known before. Something within him had changed. “This is no game.” Rowan continued, his eyes narrowed to two small slits as he glared back at the Queen. “And I am in no mood to play.”

“So you say.” The Queen stood, slowly stepping down the steps of the dais, she stood before Rowan, looking down at him with scorn. “Yet, you have been playing with me all along. Tell me, my Prince, what was your plan? Make me think that you were dead then come for me in the night? Or, perhaps you meant to ally with the elven King. Betray your own and aide our enemies in the invasion of our lands.” She circled him, like a vulture, sizing him up. “You sicken me. Everything about you sickens me.” She spat, her lips twisting into an ugly scowl. “What a pathetic coward you are, to turn on your own people. One could sink no lower than that.”

“I could think of a worse crime.” Rowan growled. “But, to answer your question, I had no plan to ever return to this place. Bringing me here was your doing and yours alone. My only wish was to live out my life in peace, far from my father and, you. I ally myself with no one and had no plans of invading or leading a rebellion against the crown. I would have been content to remain dead in your eyes. I’d live out the rest of my life as a pauper if it meant never having to look at your villainous face again.”

Rowan grinned when he saw the look of rage on Caroline’s face. Clearly she had not expected him to be so bold in his taunts. Caroline’s pinched expression showed her disgust at Rowan’s claims of innocence.

“You lie to my face?” She gasped in over exaggerated shock. “You say that you ally yourself with no one yet I have reports from my guards that you have been seen in the company of the elven Prince no less! How do you explain that? Or do you still claim that the elves are not your allies?”

Rowan pursed his lips. How did the guards know about Thaden? How long had they been watching the village before invading? Rowan tensed at the thought of vampire spies lurking among the shadows, watching him, watching all of them. How much did they know? Did they know about Tally as well? Rowan closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, steeling his nerves before he spoke again. “I have spoken no lies.” He said, his voice more stern. “I fled Rosegate with the help of the Prince. His father planned to have me executed. Believe me, the elven King is no friend to me.”

“You really expect me to believe that?” The Queen grabbed Rowan’s chin and forcefully thrust his head back so that he was facing her, eyes locked on hers, as she studied him closely. “Even now I can smell the stench of the King’s son on you. You may not be their ally but you’ve certainly become his whore.”

Rowan jerked his head away sharply. The Queens nails raked across his face, drawing blood. She grinned wickedly as she brought her bloodied finger tips to her lips and licked the blood. Her grin faltered and she spat his blood on the floor. “Disgusting.” She hissed, turning away from him. “Your blood is tainted. Tainted by the Fae. You can hardly even call yourself a vampire.”

“I am a vampire.” Rowan seethed as he stared at her, watching her return to the throne. He wanted nothing more than to slap her hard and watch her fall to the stone floor in a heap of golden curls and gilded robes. He would love nothing more than to rip her throat out and watch her blood pool on the floor beneath her until every bit of life had drained from her body. But, that was the vampire in him talking and he was also part Shee and, that part of him had no desire to see more blood spilled. “I am a vampire.” He repeated when the Queen had finally turned to look at him. “But, I am also a child of the Tuatha. Blessed by the Goddess herself. Through me, the Fae my father enslaved will find salvation.”

“Through you?” Caroline’s laughter echoed throughout the great hall. “I pity them then, if their only salvation comes from that of a fairy whore. You know, your mother once sought to free them as you claim to do now. You see how well that worked out for her. Your father made her his whore and you are no better. You have lofty dreams, child, but that is all they are. Soon, you will find that only children and fools deal in dreams. Reality is much darker and cruel. I had to learn that fact on my own. I tell you this now to spare you future heartbreak. Consider it my one act of kindness to you, the only lesson you will ever learn from me. Dreams were made to be broken. Life is a cruel mistress from which the only escape is death.”

***

“Move on then!” The guard behind Rowan gave him a hard shove forward causing Rowan to stumble, and lose his footing. Down he went, crashing to his knees, and bracing himself against the cold floor with his hands. The shackles around his wrists and ankles made it nearly impossible to move with any amount of agility and the guard, constantly pushing him to move faster, didn’t help the matter any.

“Bloody hell!” The guard shouted when Rowan fell. “I ain’t got time for this shyte.” He grumbled. “Got me a date with a pri’ee little thing down at the tavern. Ain’t gonna keep ’er waiting just fer the likes’a you.” Rowan yelped as the guard grabbed him by the hair and roughly jerked him to his feet. The guard ushered him further down the hall then yanked on the chains he was holding, stopping Rowan just as they reached the last cell. The guard pulled out a thick set of iron keys and quickly opened the cell. “In ya go.” He said, motioning for Rowan to enter the cell.

Rowan did as he was instructed then turned around, facing the guard so the man could remove the shackles. Rowan rubbed his now free wrists then looked up, an angry sneer on his face. “Your name is Flint, is it not?” Rowan asked.

The guard frowned in annoyance. “Yeah, what of it?”

“Just putting a name to a face.” Rowan told him. “So I can be sure to repay your kindness once I escape this wretched dungeon.”

Flint laughed at that. “Escape? Boi, yer gonna die in ’ere. And good riddance to ya too. I got no use for blood traitorous scum like you.” Flint slammed the door of the cell in Rowan’s face and locked it. “Enjoy yer new home, my Prince.” He chuckled.

“Just one more thing.” Rowan said as Flint was about to turn and leave.

With an annoyed sigh Flint turned back around and faced him. “Yeah, ’an what’s that?”

With a wide grin, Rowan suddenly spat in the man’s face. “Fuck you.” He hissed.

“Bastard!” Flint wiped his face before reaching a hand through the bars in an attempt to grab Rowan but Rowan moved back too quickly. Flint reached for the keys at his belt and began fumbling with them to find the key that would unlock Rowan’s cell again. “Yer gonna pay for that ya little shyte!”

“Flint!” Startled, Flint dropped the keys then turned to see Greagor standing behind him.

“Captain.” Flint coughed as he stumbled back then bowed to his superior. “I was...uh...just...”

Greagor rolled his eyes and sighed. “Don’t you have somewhere to be?” He asked the guard.

Flint nodded at once. “Ye...yes sir.”

“Then why don’t you go there.” Greagor raised an eyebrow as he stared the man down.

“Yes sir. Right away sir.” Without uttering another word, Flint hurriedly made his way back down the hall and to the stairs, taking the steps two at a time. Greagor watched until the guard was out of sight then he turned and faced Rowan.

“My Prince.” Greagor bowed to Rowan but it wasn’t in mock respect. Rowan Stepped forward, looking the man in the eye. He could tell that Greagor was conflicted. The whole situation did not sit well with the man but Rowan couldn’t dismiss his actions just because he was ‘following orders.’

“I would have arranged for better...accommodations for you.” Greagor told him. “But, I’m afraid, the Queen insisted you be taken to the dungeons.”

“Do you always so blindly follow the orders of false monarchs?” Rowan asked. His voice taking on a more acidic tone as he stared Greagor down.

“She is my Queen.” Greagor stated, showing no emotion as he spoke.

“She is a false Queen.” Rowan growled. “Wearing a stolen crown.”

“But, she wears the crown. And...” Greagor sighed. “I am loyal to the crown.”

Rowan huffed as he turned away from Greagor. “You were loyal to a mad tyrant and now your loyal to murderous witch. Neither of whom are deserving of your loyalty.”

Greagor held up his hands in defeat. “What would you have me do? Defy my Queen?”

“Yes!” Rowan turned, grabbing the bars of the cell as he stared Greagor in the face. “Defy her, throw down your sword and follow her no more!”

“That would be treason.” Greagor whispered sharply. “We could both lose our heads for even speaking of such a thing.”

Rowan laughed bitterly as he shook his head. “I never pegged you for a coward Greagor. Of all my father’s men you were the one I respected the most but now...now I’m ashamed that I ever considered you a friend.”

“I am no coward.” Greagor furrowed his brow, glaring angrily at the young Prince. “But neither am I a fool. The Queen is powerful. She has the council and most of the nobles backing her. To betray her now would be disastrous. Not only for me but for the Kingdom as well. We need a strong leader and the Queen is stronger than your father ever was. She can lead our people to greatness once more and reclaim the other realms. With her as our leader, we will be unstoppable.”

Rowan stared at him, eyes wide in disbelief. His hands tightened around the bars, his knuckles turning white with the strain. “Are you so blind that you can not see what Caroline is? My God, Greagor, the women tried to have me killed and from what I’ve heard, she is most likely responsible for my father’s death as well.”

Greagor’s head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes, taking a step closer to Rowan. “From whom did you hear that?”

Rowan took a step back, releasing his hold on the bars. “The ride here was long and tedious. I had plenty of time to do nothing but sit in silence and listen. Your guards tend to gossip when they think no one can hear them and the most popular topic seems to be your Queen. She’s beginning to lose trust with not only the guard but her servants as well. There is speculation that she and Lady Emilia plotted to murder not only me but the King himself.”

Greagor nodded as he turned his back to Rowan and sighed. “I too have heard these rumors but there is no proof to substantiate any of these claims.”

“No?” Rowan let out a staggered breath then walked to the wall and leaned his back against it. “The proof you need is right before you.” He told Greagor. “Emilia gave me a tincture claiming it to be a potion that would give me the illusion of death. She lied. What she gave me was viramyth. Had I taken it as she planned, my death would have been no illusion and instead of talking to you here and now, I would be a corpse, rotting in the family crypt. There is your proof. Take that to the council. Expose Caroline and her spawn for what they truly are.”

“The council?” Greagor turned back to Rowan, his eyes wide as he shook his head. “I can not go to the council with this.”

“Why?” Rowan pushed himself away from the wall and moved to the bars once more. He looked Greagor in the eye, demanding an answer from the man, demanding an explanation.

Greagor moved closer to Rowan. As he spoke, he lowered his voice lest their conversation be overheard by another. “Child, do you honestly think that the council knows not what is happening here? Nothing goes on in Basmorte that they do not know about. If Caroline truly killed the King as you think, then I can almost guarantee that the council already knows it.”

“If they already know, they would have called for her arrest by now.”

Greagor shook his head. “They could be persuaded to turn a blind eye. Especially if the final outcome suited their needs as well as Caroline’s.”

Rowan narrowed his eyes as he thought about what Greagor was saying. Would the council really stand by and do nothing while Caroline plotted to kill their King? “So, you think it’s possible that the council knew what she was planning but did nothing to stop her?”

“I think it’s not only possible but almost certain that they knew exactly what she was planning. They may have even played a part in this conspiracy. As I’ve said, nothing goes on in this Kingdom that they do not know about and more importantly, nothing happens that they do not allow to happen.”

“If that’s true...” Rowan questioned. “Then how did I escape the first time? Why did no one stop me and why would they allow the entire Kingdom to think that I was dead?”

“That I can not say. I do not know what their end game is but I do know that if you are here now, it’s because they want you here.”

“My mother once told me that all roads lead to the same destination. The journey may change based on the choices we make along the way but the outcome remains the same. We can’t change destiny.” Rowan leaned his head against the bars and closed his eyes. “My future has already been set in stone.” He said with a sigh. “So, what do I do now?”

Greagor shrugged, shaking his head. “If the course of events in your life have led you to this point...let it play out. As you’ve said, you can’t fight fate. So, why not embrace it?”