Shadows Lurking

August 14th, 2005 - Sunday, 5:45am

A chill is in the air as my blanket rides up my legs, exposing my bare feet. My body no longer aches from the strain of yesterday. That Kerum man was right, I just needed to sleep an entire day away. He hadn’t given me any typical adult stares of disapproval when I mentioned not wanting to have the stupid tour he was starting to give me. He only nodded while escorting me to this room. A room with four other beds in it. I at least got to sleep in one that’s right next to the door. No one can sneak up on me this way and, if I needed to, I could just get up and run out of the room.

Shuffling and whispers have my body going rigid. No way people are awake yet. It’s got to be before six in the morning, at least. Sure enough though, the whispering seems to be shushed down by another person as I stir under the pale blue sheets. Four collective voices. Four different people. The four owners of the four beds in the room.

Sitting up, I can feel the silk material of sheet fall to the floor without care. Knowing I probably look a bit strange wearing jeans and a t-shirt while I sleep, the thought of them judging me bothers me none. I doubt I’ll even be in this place for very long. All it will take is just one day with the professors, one day with this King guy, and they’ll all know that a murderous thing like me shouldn’t be here.

“Hi!”

Jumping back from the sudden presence in front of my face, I landed backwards on the floor on the other side of the bed. As I struggle to sit up, tangled in the sheets, a small collection of stifled laughter can be heard.

“Good going, Corey,” someone snickers. “You scared the poor kid. It’s only his first day.”

“I didn’t scare anyone!” This Corey guy protests. “At least, I didn’t mean to scare anyone.”

“I’m not scared,” I huff out from the floor. Frustration eats at me already. “Just got surprised is all.”

“There you have it, guys.” The tone is already sounding suspiciously condensing. “The poor kid wasn’t scared, just surprised.”

Growling, I finally sat up, hands splayed out on the bed and ready to tear every one of them apart. My eyes scan over the small group of teenaged boys. They look about my age and height except for two of them, the one closest to me, the brown eyed guy that scared- surprised me, and the one in the corner with red hair. The brown eyed kid looks shorter than all of us. However, I’m sure if we were all standing near one another, I’d be the second tallest compared to the red head in the corner.

“Uh oh.” The red head with brown eyes smiles at me while waiving, freckles littering his face. He’s definitely older than us. “You guys had to go and piss off the newbie, didn’t you? Hey, sorry about these guys. They mean well, really, they do. They just don’t get enough practice when making new friends. Are you hurt or anything?”

Ignoring his seemingly friendly smile, I stand to my feet and brush off the fading ache in my shoulder. Something about one of the boys seems familiar. My eyes catch his and that’s when it clicks. The green eyes, the black hair touching his jawline. It’s the guy that stopped me from punching Brentley. Anger surges through me at remembering how the kid had touched me, grabbed my arm and held it hostage.

Standing, I make my way over to him. The others seem to be scrambling out of the way, but he doesn’t move, he stupidly stands his ground. The guy stays still and just takes it when I punch him square in the jaw. He slumps to the floor, holding his face in his hand as he spits a bit of blood onto the wooden flooring. But he still doesn’t make a move to defend himself against me.

One hit should do it, I think.

“What the hell, man!”

The one with blonde hair and blue eyes seems to be moving closer towards us, but suddenly stops. I heard it before I seen it. A slap of skin against skin. The guy from the floor is now standing between me and the blonde-haired guy, a hand encasing his wrist just as he had mine the day I almost punched Bentley. He stopped the guy from touching me.

“Don’t touch him,” the guy grunts out. “It’s fine. I got what I deserved.”

“What?” The blonde seems flabbergasted now as he looks between me and his friend. “Are you kidding me, Matt? You just met the kid and he’s already throwing punches! How did you deserve that?”

“I just did. I’ll explain later, after breakfast.” The guy I punched turns to me now, a small smirk playing on his busted lip. “You can pack a mean punch. Good thing I didn’t let you hit that jerk. You probably would’ve knocked his jaw out of place. He’d be using a straw to eat for the rest of his life.”

I say nothing in return. What does this guy want, a compliment, a thanks, a gesture of appreciation? He’ll get none of the above.

“Mattheo.” He extends his fist out to me, knuckles showing. Knuckles covered in healed cuts and fresh bruises for the most part.

Against everything inside of me, I nudge his knuckles with my own in a show of fist-bumping. “Rylan.”

“This here is James.” He points to the blonde-haired guy that nearly touched me. “Corey.” The brunette with brown eyes that forced me to fall out of bed. “And this is Percy.” The guy with red hair, brown eyes, and freckles seems a bit nervous about an interaction with me now. Good.

Percy clears his throat. “I’m kind of like your den mother. I make sure you get to bed on time, get up for classes, and escort you into town when it’s approved. I’m basically your dad for the schoolyear.”

“I don’t have a dad.”

The words were cold and felt like acid on my tongue as they left my lips. They’re true, but a part of me feels as though I’ve never had a dad. I can’t mourn losing Noah considering there is nothing to miss about him being gone.

None of the boys seem to know what to say now and that’s fine with me. Maybe now they’ll stop trying to introduce themselves to me. I don’t need to know who they are. I won’t be here long anyways.

Beeping comes from the red head, and he opens a phone up, clicking buttons as he does so. The other boys look on in complete awe of the device, but I only go back to my bed. Making the bed is something that’s become a bit too routine for me. Sometimes I would make up an entire room and not even realize it. Back at home, if things weren’t in order by the time Noah got off work, he was angry.

I can remember the day he first hit me. It was so quick, so out of nowhere that it completely shocked us both. He had never struck me before that day. Seven years old, terrified of my own father, and bleeding on the kitchen floor. My ears had rung so badly, and my face burnt with no sign of stopping. Tears flowed easily back then, back when I could cry and not worry about Noah retaliating. Back when I called him Daddy and not Noah. Back before he became a monster.

I step back to take in my completely made-up bed and the military style of it. Some habits will be hard to break now that he’s gone.

“-for the last time. He just doesn’t care about something as simple as an easy grade. It would make all of our lives easier, but James is too prissy for that.”

“You know we’d get detention for it and that’s not a good idea right now given everything that’s happened the last couple weeks.”

The boys are in full swing as they move about the room. They’re probably getting ready for their everyday routine. The thought of being around a whole bunch of people causes my skin to crawl and I scratch at my arms. People will be bumping into me, crowding me. Heart hammering in chest, tears watering, and welts forming on my arms, I realize death might’ve been better than coming here.

“You should get dressed before we head down for breakfast,” the blonde says before tugging a shirt over his head. “Dawes will kill us for letting you leave like that.”

“Like what?” I bite back, clearly offended.

The Mattheo guy gives me a deadpan stare before saying bluntly, “Like crap. You look like you slept in those clothes.”

“Because I did.”

They all seem to find that comment funny because they’re all chuckling now. All of them except the one I had punched. Mattheo’s black hair is now all pulled up into a knot nearing the top of his head. A few strands fall from it and lay across his face. Two black eyebrows, trimmed to perfection. Although, one has a notch in it, a spot where no hair grows, disconnecting it from the other part. It looks intentionally placed, but who would do something like that to their eyebrow? He seems like a strange kid, stranger than the others.

Not bothering to say anything, the guy tosses two articles of clothing at me. Dark washed jeans that have tears in them and a Nirvana t-shirt. It looks like it’s been bleached by accident in some places, a pinkish and white color bleeding through the black cotton material.

They all finished up what they were doing and are now just staring at me. Their expectant expressions cause my skin to crawl once more. No way am I changing in a room with a bunch of people I don’t know, especially not with them staring at me like this.

“What- Are you suddenly shy?” The Corey guy crosses his arms. He’s shorter than the rest of us and seems to be quicker with his words than the rest. “We’re all guys here, you know. Your body isn’t gonna be anything special.”

“Come on.” Mattheo signals to the others to follow him out of the door. “Give him a minute.”

Corey looks as though he wants to complain but doesn’t. He huffs as he follows behind James and Percy. For the first time in a long time, someone was giving me privacy. Mattheo made them leave so I could change with privacy. No one asked him to do that, no one forced him. He just did it. Mattheo’s someone I’m beginning to think will become an ally.

After throwing on my clothes as quickly as I can, I take a moment to study the room. The beds are all matching; pale blue sheets, matching pillowcases, and four posts with howling wolf heads on the top of the ones on the headboard. Small and simple nightstands accompany the left side of each bed with a simple lantern on each one. Three windows look out to show the ground nearly four stories below.

This is one of the towers from outside. I can easily see the gate from the middle window. Kerum stands talking with a random man down below, seemingly frustrated as the conversation progresses. The man, old and wrinkled with grey hair and suspenders, looks even more upset tan Kerum as he motions towards the school building. Whatever their talking about, it must not be a good thing.

Peeking out of the room, I can see the four of the boys waiting at the end of the hallway, just before the staircase. Corey and James are playing with a beanbag ball type of thing while Percy messes with buttons on his phone. Mattheo though, he stands off to the side, quiet and observant. None of them say much as I make my way to them. They take the stairs without so much as a glance back at me, not even to see if I’m keeping up fine.

The farther descend the stairs, the more I’m convinced that I’ve somehow time travelled. Everything is so different here. It’s as if we’ve stepped back into the medieval age. I’m expecting to see knights in suits of armor and a court jester performing for a king. Stone walls covered in small cracks and fissures with bits of moss and vines in certain places. The flooring in the main hallway is stone as well rather than wood like in the bedroom. Nearly thirty stone steps were needed to climb down to get to this main hallway. None of the others seem affected much by the climbing and I can only assume it’s because they’ve been doing it since they were eleven.

Like I should’ve been.

What would my life have been like if I had come here when I was younger? No beatings, no stinging words, no bottles of burning hot liquid poured down my throat. No being chained up on my birthday’s, no hiding bruises and cuts from teachers, no pushing potential friends away so that they wouldn’t see the damage that had been dealt to me. No late-night drunken visits from Noah...

What would my life had been like had Noah died instead of my mom?

“Welcome to Rienridge Academy’s meal hall.” Percy stands near me now as the others take off in a hurry to the nearest open table. “This is where us Lycan’s eat, socialize, and have our assemblies when they’re indoors. I’ll be over with the other sixth year students. If you need me- for anything, Rylan- just shout and I’ll come running. But the boys should keep an eye out for you. You boys are littermates now.”

Not even explaining what half of that meant, Percy leaves, heading for a table across the room. There are eight rows, and they all make my skin crawl. Each one seems to be occupied by at least twenty children. The table the boys are at seems to be kids our age while the one next to that one on the right-hand side seems to be fourteen-year-olds. The one on the left-hand side seems to be the twelve-year-old's. Each table is long with wooden benches used as seats. Food seems to cover almost every inch of the tables. I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen this much food in one place at one time.

I ignore the stares that each table decides they need to give me. Making my way to the empty spot on the edge of the table where the boys are sitting, I notice there’s one empty spot. It’s right next to Mattheo. Sliding into the spot, I notice how Mattheo leaves a pretty decent gap in between us. A small part of me, however deep and dormant that part might be, is thankful for it. He makes sure not to knock his arm against mine when reaching for food and avoids reaching out too far over into my area. The others, they just stare at him like he’s lost his mind, but they don’t know what he’s already deduced; touch me and you’ll regret it.

Breakfast goes by without a hitch. In other words, no one touches me, and everyone keeps their conversations to themselves, excluding me from them entirely.

Percy walks me to an office with a large paw print painted black on the front of the wooden door. The spot above the door is labeled ‘Administrative Office’ nicely on a golden plaque. This feels all too familiar. I’ve been escorted to the principal’s office way too much, but going on the first day is fairly new. I guess I should’ve expected this. I punched a guy as soon as I woke up, not a great way to start the day or the semester.

Inside the office there are two desks mirroring one another. Both are large and mahogany and completely covered with paper. Well, one does look a lot more organized than the other does. An older woman, brown hair with grey streaks and small pale-brown eyes, sits behind the more organized desk. Her hair is pinned into place, a small knot on the back of her head, but unlike Mattheo’s, each strand is perfectly in place. She wears a dark brown dress that looks like something one of the older teachers back in the normal school would wear.

Everyone here seems to appear normal on the outside, but I bet they’re all just like me. Monsters.

“Mister Evans.” The woman stands now, and her short heels click as she makes her way around the desk. “Thank you for bringing him in, Mister Marsh. You may leave now. I’ll take over from here.”

Percy only nods before exiting the room, not even giving me so much of a goodbye. Not that I need one, of course. I had just expected him to is all.

The woman then urges me to sit in one of the two armchairs in between the desks. I comply, only because she seems sweet on the outside. Back at my old school, the teachers, especially the older ones, were super cruel when you disobeyed them. Those were the ones that would actually smack you with the rulers while the other younger teachers would try to talk it out with you. Yeah, I definitely liked the younger ones.

“It’s so good to finally meet you, Mister Evans.” She smiles a warm smile, but I keep my guard up. Just in case. “I had told Kerum that I wished to speak with you as soon as you got in yesterday, but I’m learning that the old bag of bones never listens to anything I say.”

Realizing that I’m not going to answer or show any indication of having interest in conversing, she sighs out, “Would it be right to assume you’ve yet to receive a tour of the grounds?”

“No” I shake my head, but quickly remember how I’m supposed to address an older lady. “Ma’am. No, Ma’am.”

Her smile only grows as she says, “Right, well I’ll see to it that Percy escorts you around the grounds.” Her eyes widen now as she gasps, “Oh dear, I haven’t introduced myself, have I?” She gives me no chance to answer before holding her hand out to me. “I’m Professor Dawes. I will be your- Well, I don’t quite have an official title, but it would be fitting to be referred to as a guidance counselor of some kind.”

I don’t want to be rude, but she’s holding her hand out expectantly. This place is filled with people who sure do like to touch one another a lot. Taking her hand in mine, I bite down on the inside of my mouth and blood begins to pool. A deep bubble fills my chest, almost like a questionable belch, but I know what it is; I’m about to growl at this woman.

“Now, I’m to catch you up to speed on a few things before releasing you back into the school.” She releases my hand, and I can feel a type of weight shift from my shoulders. My chest and back felt way too tight. “Kerum has already mentioned your godfather, yes?” I nod. “Excellent. Nicholas will be here shortly to meet you, but we won’t discuss you staying on campus or with him during holidays until after you’ve met with him. We want to make sure you two will be getting along with no issues.”

Staying with him on holiday? I hadn’t realized that I’d be living with this strange man. I’m not sure how I feel about that part. Maybe that’s something that can be discussed before it’s set in stone, if it isn’t already.

“Here is your class schedule and a map of the school. You should not need the map as much with Mister Marsh showing you about for the next couple weeks, but it might come in handy should you get lost or feel the need to explore on your own.” She places a folder in my hands with a pawprint logo on the front. “The only other thing that is left to discuss is your mental status.”

I try not to find offense in that, but ouch. “My mental status?”

“Yes, Mister Evans, your mental status. You see, you were forced to keep from shifting for the first time, were you not?”

There’s no way they know about what Noah had done to me. Shaking my head, making my face void of any emotions, just as he taught me, I do my best to ignore the burning in my chest at lying to her.

“Rylan, dear-” Professor Dawes places a tentative hand, a motherly hand on mine. “We know you were forced to keep from shifting, but we do not understand the way in which it was done.”

My chest feels heavy, building up with multiple bubbles, but I can’t let them out. If these people are all monsters just like me then they’ve had more experience with killing than I have. No way am I ticking them off.

“Were you forced to endure a type of pain or drink any kind of liquids, ones that might have glowed perhaps?”

Glowed- The vials of liquids he would make me drink. I remember them clearly as if they were being held up right in front of my face now. They glowed. The liquid would light my face in a purple hue as he forced it down my throat in the dark room. His own face, tinted purple as he smiled, watching the liquid leak from my lips. It burned. God, did it burn so bad.

“They were purple,” I barely breathed out. “They only glowed a little, but they were a purple color.”

“Thank you, dear.” Professor Dawes rubs a small circle around my busted knuckle and holds my stare, a look of pity in her eyes that causes me to nearly throw up. “I want you to know that you’re safe here with us. You will never endure that again.”

“I’m fine.”

She smiles at me, clearly seeing through the front I’ve put up since I was seven. “Rylan, it’s okay to feel something about what happened to you. Whether that feeling be anger or confusion. No one expects you to be the easiest child to teach or to even love. I do hope that you’ll give us the chance though. The chance to prove to you that we want nothing but what’s best for you.”

Her eyes, her smile, even her touch- She acts as though she’s telling the truth, and a deep part of me wants to believe her. I want to break down in tears, cry as this random woman I’ve just met holds me and soothes my beaten soul, but I can’t. I can’t afford to get attached to these people. Noah had always made one thing clear growing up; people, even people you love with all your heart, can change within a matter of seconds.

“With that being said-“ She stands gathers another folder from her desk before opening it. “-we will want you to attend mandatory counseling for the time being.”

“What- Mandatory?” That’s stupid. I don’t need counseling.

“Yes, you heard me correctly, Mister Evans; mandatory.” Her eyes seem to smile on their own with how bright they are now. “You’ll be with me for the counseling sessions. Unless, of course, you’d prefer to speak with the headmaster directly.”

“You.” The answer is a no-brainer. The last thing I want is to be trapped in a room alone with some random guy I’ve only just met. “I choose you.”

“Excellent,” she says while laying the folder down gently. “I trust you’re getting on well with the other boys in your dorm room?”

“They’re alright.”

Her eyes slightly narrow and her upper lip looks pinched now. “Rylan, for this to work, we’ll need to be fully transparent with one another.”

“t-transaparent- What is that?”

Those pale-brown eyes now close for a moment before Professor Dawes sighs out, “Transparent, dear. It means nearly see through. I need you to be open with me about things. Truthful about yourself, your past, how it made you feel and how you currently feel. It’s what therapy is all about.”

She wants me to tell her everything? Images begin to pass through my brain; everything. My hands grip the chair now as I take a deep breath. There’s no way I can tell her anything. She seems like a nice person and all, but there are some things that should be kept quiet.

Noah always said that what happens in our family stays in our family. That no one else would understand if they knew. And, for once, I’m just going to trust him on that.

Knocking sounds from the other side of the door and Professor Dawes stands on her feet. Her feeble looking hands wipe at the spot under her eyes, as if she’s drying tears, but there were none, that I could tell. The door opens to reveal a man I’ve not met yet, but he’s strikingly familiar. Short black hair but bangs that have been pushed back so they don’t cover those dark green eyes. He looks like the older carbon copy of Mattheo.

“Ah, Nicholas. I was wandering when you would get here.” Professor Dawes steps to the side and lets the older Mattheo walk in with no problem. “Nicholas King, this here is your nephew, Rylan. Rylan, this is Nicholas King. He was your mother’s best friend.”

“Since we were kids,” the man chuckles. “She was a firecracker, your mother. And you- Well, Gods, you looked just like her. You even have her little freckle on your nose.”

He steps closer and I can smell his cologne. I can feel the heat of his body fighting to mingle with mine and it’s as if I’m trapped in the room. The room was so much bigger before, but now- Everything’s too close for comfort. Even my own skin feels too tight.

I don’t know this man. I don’t want to be here.

His hand outstretches toward me as he advances forward and all I see is Noah. It’s Noah’s towering frame standing over me. I’m stuck lying on the ground as he continues to kick at me. Pain spreads through my back as each blow causes a panicked cry to rip from my lungs even when breath can’t escape.

“Rylan! Rylan, no! You need to calm down- Someone get Professor Grey!”

“What’s wrong with him? What happened to him? Someone tell me now!”

“Nicholas, you need to step back- Back up away from him.”

Heat begins spreading to different parts of my body. Pain comes from the tips of my fingers and it’s then that I notice them. The claws are coming back. Panic is all I feel in my chest now as I watch them grow, feeling helpless, like a prisoner in my own body.

“N-No,” I growl out. “I- I don’t- Ah! I don’t want t-this.”

“Then you need to breathe, Rylan.” Professor Dawes stands next to me, a hand showing no intention of touching me. She’s keeping her distance. “No one here is going to hurt you. You are not in any danger. Do you understand?”

I nod, or at least, I try to nod. My neck feels stiff along with every other part of my body. The more she stands there, shushing me and reassuring me that I’m safe, the less stiff my body becomes. Eventually, I’m left a panting mess on the stone floor. My body starts to cool down as it rests against the stone. I almost shifted again. I would’ve killed everyone in this room.

“Someone needs to tell me what is going on with my nephew, right now!” The man, Nicholas, sounds more concerned for me than I’ve ever heard anyone act before. “What is going on?”

Something tells me that Professor Dawes will be more than willing to explain things to him rather than make me do it.

“Is he alright?” A somewhat familiar voice breaks through the barrier of sounds. “Do I need to fetch Nurse Kim?”

“No- No, that won’t be necessary, Kerum. Thank you for keeping the other students back.” Professor Dawes sighs out, “This would be a mess should it get out that Mister Evans here cannot control his shifting.”

“What are we to do, Lenora?” Kerum asks her now, now seeming uncertain.

“The only thing we can do.” Professor Dawes begins crouching back down in front of me, a look of pity in her eyes again. “Train him like we would any other first-time shifter. But for now, it would be best for Mister Evans to spend some time alone. Time to reflect on everything he’s recently learned.”

Nicholas steps forward again and my heart thumps with anxiety. “But what about-”

“At a later time, Nicholas.” Professor Dawes smiles down at me. “He needs a moment.”