Saving Harper

When we got back sa condo ko from meeting his family, I felt too lazy to pack things for our trip so Xavier warned me na mas lalung no chill sya bukas pag nag empake kami. Natatawa parin ako over that fact. But at least I was warned. Di ko alam kung paano ko masisingit yung iba kong gustong dalhin. Magpapacute nalang ulit ako.

"Why are you 'no chill' pag dating sa packing?"

"Ano ulit? Saan?" Xavier smiled mischievously. Alam ko naman he was pertaining to something that rhymes with 'packing'.

"Packing shit." I rolled my eyes as I closed the room light leaving us with the lampshade glow. I climbed to my bed kung nasan kanina pa syang nakaupo at kumportable na. I can't express how even my soul jumps for joy seeing him on my bed. Like it was made for him to be there.

"OC lang siguro ako. Saka sa totoo lang, ako din naman mag bubuhat nyang mga maleta mo, so pinapagaan ko lang talaga yung buhay ko." He chuckled.

May sense since Xavier is exactly the type na dadalhin lahat para sayo, so malamang sya magdadala ng mga maleta ko. Pero paano naman yung mga gamit na gusto kong dalihin? All the extra clothes I wanted to choose from. I asked him about that, baka sakaling pag bigyan nya ko.

"Babe, most of the time, naka heavy coat tayo don so paano makikita ng mga taong kasama natin yung outfit mong I'm sure cute at maganda?"

I sulked but again, tama sya. Wala ngang makakakita non. Buuuut, OPLAN: Pa-cute will still commence tomorrow.

"Ikaw makikita mo." I started testing the waters.

"Alam mo kung anong gusto kong makita?" He smiled teasingly and his voice changed. Jusko po. Nagsimula nanaman akong kabahan because just when I thought I can have my way, he turns to another direction surprising me yet again. But regarding the topic he veered to, hindi ko alam kung hanggang kailan ko kayang mag hold back ng mga nararamdaman ko everytime we have really heavy make out sessions.

Yung self-control ni Xavier when it comes to asking me if I was ready was incredibly strong, pero syempre madaming instances na I could feel things from his body... umm, for the lack of better term, harden, and napapadalas yung pag kulong nya sa bathroom after. Sya yung pinaka hirap dito, but never syang nagreklamo.

Just take the fucking chance Harper! Kung olats ka sa sex, pwede naman kayong magpractice! Think of it as training. Eventually you'll be able to perfect it after a lot of practice. Malay mo magaling na teacher si Xavier? I giggled at that and because of the fact that I was thinking about this too technically.

Tinaasan ako ng kilay ni Xavier wondering why I just giggled. "Alam mo na yung gusto kong makita?" I almost forgot his hirit.

"No. What's that Mr. Arnaiz?"

"E bakit ka parang kiniliting teenager?"

Namula ako. "Hindi kaya." I fixed my face. He took me into his arms so nakasandal nako sa kanya sideways.

"So anong gusto mong makita?" Ay binalik ko pa talaga dun yung topic no? Ako ata yung excited na may ipakita. Mamaya bundok lang pala sa Iceland yung gusto nyang makita. Pero nag punta na sya don e. "Yung bakas ng rebelde days mo."

I frowned. As if naman madami akong marka ng rebelde days. Then suddenly naalala ko. He wanted to see my tattoo. When I first mentioned that, I was beyond unready to show it. But now that we're dating, I didn't see why it should be a problem. Nahihiya nalang naman ako ng konti. But if I was starting to contemplate about sex, ano ba naman na ipakita ko na sakanya.

"Sige, but you need to see it in front of the mirror."

Mukhang nagulat sya ng konti when I obliged on showing him. Bumangon kaming dalawa then hinila ko sya papunta sa full-length mirror ko inside my walk-in closet. Tangina Harper buti nalang you're not wearing one of your silk lingeries kasi mapapakita mo lahat ng di oras.

He was standing behind me and he wrapped his arms across my chest and pinatong yung baba nya on my right shoulder waiting for me to show him.

"Medyo bagay tayo no?" He commented first nung tumingin sya sa salamin at our position. I smiled, kinikilig as always.

I pulled the right side of my PJs and underwear way down to show him, while keeping my grip sa gitnang part just to make sure I won't accidentally show more. I think medyo nagulat sya sa ginawa ko at kung saan nakalagay. When he saw the tattoo, which was the word "believe" in script but you will only be able to read it when you face the mirror, a small smile played on his lips.

"Ganda. I love it." He said appreciatively and he also nodded as if hindi pa enough yung sinabi nya to convey his opinion about it. "Kelan mo to pinagawa? Handwriting mo yan no?" He stared at our reflection and my tattoo.

"Nothing gets past you, kahit handwriting ko walang kawala. I got it right after I moved out. May time na nag aalangan ako if I did the right thing by leaving." I remembered that moment. Not one of my parents even called me to check kung may nakakain ako at kung buhay pa ko. Although binabayaran parin naman nila yung tuition ko every sem so I guess alam nilang pumapasok pa ko kahit papano. And they also got my grad invites. Yun lang... well you know the rest of what happened.

"It was a reminder to myself what I should do every time feeling kong hindi ko na kaya. That's why it's inverted. Because I was the only one who needs to see it" I continued.

"I'm sorry babe, kasi medyo nag space out ako nung nageexplain ka." He snickered at something na naiisip nya lang. I raised my eyebrow at him questioningly. Ako yung usually nagsspace out saaming dalawa. "Nadistract ako kasi ang naiisip ko lang is how absolutely hot you look right now." He whispered to my ear.

I suddenly felt my body grow hot.

"Well palagi ka namang hot...." He continued but I interrupted him by turning around to kiss him.

The way he whispered and our kiss awoken so many feelings inside of me. Very physical feelings. I think naramdaman nya yung sudden change with the way I was kissing him. It was too needy and too fueled up.

I pushed him and medyo nagulat sya kasi napasandal sya sa mga drawers ko sa likod nya. We heard it rattle a bit from pushing him against it with the force I didn't even know I had. He didn't protest so I don't think I've hurt him. He was holding me at my back and one hand was at the back of my neck while nakapulupot naman yung kamay ko sa leeg nya.

I lowered my hands without breaking our kiss to pull up his shirt which he helped me take off the we went back to our very hungry kiss. His shirt was thrown somewhere. He turned me and ako naman yung nalubog para mapasandal sa mga damit kong naka hang while our kiss intensified. I wasn't really thinking kung anong magiging itsura ng mga damit ko dito after this. I could feel some of it fall to my feet.

He lowered his hand to my waist and placed his hand inside touching my back. His touch burned my already fevered body.

He took the hem of my shirt and I raised my arms so he can pull it off me. Natapon din yon somewhere. I had no time to be conscious of my body as he eyed it appreciatively. He smiled again and we continued kissing. I think he felt na we had to move since what was about to happen might leave my walk in closet in god knows what state after. Hinila nya ko carefully guiding me back to my bed and I don't think anything can break our kiss kahit naglalakad pa kami. I was already out of breath but who cares. There are many ways to die, and I would gladly choose this way for myself.

Before I knew it, nasa kama na kami with Xavier on top of me. I didn't know it was still possible at this point, but wildfire spread through my body. I don't remember ever desiring someone like this. So strongly. So desperately.

I felt Xavier's hand move to my chest and my toes curled when he touched one of my breasts then he started kissing my neck. His kisses trailed from my neck, to my collar bone then claimed one of my mounds as he caressed the other. I couldn't help it, I moaned and grabbed a handful of his hair sa sobrang sarap ng ginagawa nya. I could feel him smile kahit busy sya sa ginagawa nya.

He reached down to my pajamas and took it off of me followed by my lacy underwear that I was so glad I wore. I almost fainted when he started kissing me slowly down there. I moaned and again took handful of his hair on my fist. He doesn't stop. His tongue expertly explored me and drove me to my climax as I screamed and convulsed, my last shred of sanity shattered around me as I twisted most of Xavier's hair on my fingers dahil sa nararamdaman ko. Finally letting it all out feels so heavenly.

I felt spent and was still shivering from my orgasm, but I've said before, we will always desire more. And that was what I want. More. I sat upright and reached down sa boxers shorts ni Xavier to take them off. He looked at me, eyes full of need that mirrored mine but with a hint of questioning.

"Seriously Xavier? Ngayon ka pa magtatanong if I want this?" I kissed him full of teasing as my smile played on my lips.

"I want to hear it." His eyes turned dark.

"I want you. All of you." I whispered seductively staring at him.

And that was all it took. Napahiga ako and he pushed my legs apart. Without taking his eyes off me, he sinks into me in a deliciously slow pace. I closed my eyes relishing the feeling of his fullness. I could feel a hint of pain as I stretched around him, but it was nothing compared to the pleasure of having him inside me. We started kissing again.

Instinctively, as if I have never forgotten it, I tilted my hips to meet him. He eases out and thrusts again slowly but deeply and I cried out with so much pleasure. Oh-so-slowly, he moved in and out again and again and again as I felt myself tighten around him. We were kissing intensely and the contrast it had from how slow and deep he was moving inside me was making me burst out of my seams. I dug my nails on his back as I felt myself explode again calling out his name. I kissed him hungrily again, my desire for him emanating from it. He started to quicken his pace grabbing my headboard for support. Hindi ko alam kung kakayanin to ng kama ko as it scraped in protest at every push. Holy fuck. Kung masarap yung kanina, mas masarap yung ngayon. I held onto his biceps as I tried desperately to cling to my sanity once more. After I few more thrusts, I mind-numbingly exploded into a million pieces around him and he followed right after, calling out my name then buried his head in my neck feeling his hurried breaths after his release.

He gave me a soft kiss and collapsed beside me.

Wow. It was mind-blowing for me. I've never experienced reaching my peak multiple times. Xavier was that good.

We were both out of breath and my pulse was still racing. Feeling ko nanginginig pa rin ako. I was out of words, and for a long while yung paghinga lang namin yung naririnig ko, slowly going back to its normal rate.

He looked at me and gave a tired smile. He turned to his side and pinatong nya yung upper body nya sakin, hug-smothering me under him. I could also feel his heartbeat, pabagal na, but still beating strongly. "Napagod ka?" I nudged him softly. As if ka naman Harper. Gusto mo pa?

"Ginulat mo ko e." He chuckled.

"Sige next time, lagay mo yan sa schedule ko para prepared ka."

Natawa sya sa sinabi ko. "Parang mas gusto kong nagugulat." He pretended to think about it. He kissed me again and he held me in his arms where sleep took me.

Xavier almost dragged me out of my bed for work the following morning. Ang kapal ko pang humirit sa kanya kagabi kung napagod sya tapos ako ngayon yung ayaw bumangon.

Tumayo sya sa kama ko after giving me a kiss nung nakita nyang gising nako so he can take a shower. I was prepared to admire his body, but my eyes bulged when I saw his back and arms. It was full of scratch marks na namumula pa rin. I did that?!

"Xavier, oh my god." I groaned. Bigla syang napalingon sakin checking my reaction. "Your back. And yung arms mo din!" I pointed.

"Oo kanina ko lang naramdaman pag gising ko. Parang gigil ka ata masyado kagabi. I think you also almost took my scalp off." He smirked.

Yeah naalala ko nga yon. I didn't think I pulled on his hair that hard, but then again wala ako masyadong pag iisip na ginawa kagabi.

"I'm sorry." I don't think any of his shirt could hide yung mga marka sa arms nya. Dapat mag jacket nalang sya.

"I'm not." ;He winked at me and entered the bathroom.

Bumangon ako and now I was starting to feel the pain between my legs. Kaya ayokong bumangon e, baka di ako makalakad. Natawa ako over that thought. I will never regret anything that we did last night. It was too perfect for me. I surveyed my room. Yeah, obviously my PJs and underwear with his boxers were strewn around which I picked up and tossed to my laundry bin. My eyes darted towards my walk in closet. What? Ganito ba kami kagulo kagabi? I put on my robe and walked inside.

I have a lot of clothes on the floor that fell off their hangers and the drawer where I pushed him was also angled, which akala ko konti lang yung ginalaw. Lahat ba ng nangyari kagabi was more umm, energetic than I imagined? Inayos ko muna lahat bago pa makita ni Xavier, but I think he already surveyed the damage nung pag daan nya and nung natapos ako, tapos na din si Xavier sa shower.

"Tagal mo naman, hinintay kita don." Now I can freely admire him and his body as he only had a towel wrapped around his waist. Di ko alam why I didn't take in all this view kagabi. Parang nadala nako masyado sa halikan namin. Suppressed feelings and impulses have a way of surfacing much more stronger. Parang yung feelings ko lang para kay Xavier.

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Harper, reminder, titigan mo muna yang katawan na yan bago ka magpadala with your urges. If you can ever control them.

"Inayos mo pa? E guguluhin din natin yan mamaya." He pointed at my closet smiling boyishly.

"Bakit turn on ba sayo yung closed spaces?" Tinaasan ko sya ng kilay as I gave him our shirts to dump to the laundry bin.

"Kasi mag eempake tayo ng gamit mo, ikaw kung ano-ano agad iniisip mo." He lightly laughed.

"Bwiset." I slapped him in his arm deliberately dun sa mga scratch marks na namumula pa rin hanggang ngayon when I passed him.

"Ow." He reacted but pulled my hand preventing me from entering my bathroom and he held me by the waist. "Just so you know Harper, ang turn on ko ikaw. Kahit nasan pa tayo." He leaned down and kissed me deeply. Well Xavier's shirt definitely failed to hide the scratch marks on his arms. Namumula parin and sobrang halata what it is and how he got them. The scratches were a perfect match to my fingers pag dinikit mo dun. Jusko. It was like a sign post for everyone to see and read. Wearing a shirt saying 'I had sex last night' would have produced the same effect or I might as well have given him a hickey on the neck. Xavier didn't even attempt to hide it kahit may jacket sya sa kotse. But the not caring part was growing in on me. Wala nakong pakielam kung nakita pa yon ng mga tao. As if they can really ask me about it. Medyo nahiya lang ako nung pinansin yun ni Sir George. I quickly went to another direction nung narinig kong tinanong nya si Xavier kung anong kumalmot sa kanya. Ayoko ng marinig yung isasagot don ni Xavier.

Of course, I can always count on Franco to hirit the most embarrassing things. Along the lines of having an extremely wild night or being attacked by a wild animal. Kahit kay Xavier nya sinasabi, it didn't made any difference kasi mas malala kung paano nya ko lokohin sa pag tingin nya. He was just sparing me from his verbal banter by directing everything to Xavier who fared better pag dating sa ganong lokohan. Pero sa totoo lang, I didn't think it was wild. Napaka OA lang ni Franco.

"Cheeseburger and fries mo madam." Xavier handed me my wrapped food pag dating ng delivery. He was buttering me up kasi nakauwi na kami sa condo ko and nagsisimula na kaming mag empake ng gamit ko for our trip. Correction, nagsisimula na syang mag empake ng gamit ko.

Umpisa pa lang nagtatalo na kami ni Xavier kung anong luggage ang dapat kong dalhin. I insisted on bringing 2 medium ones and sabi nya 1 medium and 1 small lang daw kasi 5 days lang kami and may mga vacuum bags naman daw ako for my coats. Kanina pa ko nakasimangot. OPLAN: Pa-cute was nowhere near successful as I hoped it would be.

Of course he had a list.

Well, I was warned he would be like this. Pero that didn't stop us from arguing over the number of clothes I should be bringing.

"Ano to?" Asking me kung ano yung nilapag ko sa kama ko.

"Pantulog, duh. Sabi mo diba?" ;He scanned my pile.

"Bakit ang dami?" He frowned at it.

"I'm going to layer. Malamig don diba?" I shrugged. Ayoko na din makipag talo muna so I'm just taking the logical route. Layering was a given rule when you travel to cold places.

"May heater sa hotel babe so kahit wala kang isuot, okay lang." He smiled. Sya ngayon yung mukhang nagpapacute. Nope, Mr. Arnaiz bahala ka dyan, I sulked.

"O e bakit nasa listahan mo pa yan?" I retorted.

He caught on my snarky tone and exhaled. He crossed the room kung saan ako nakaupo starting to eat my french fries. Baka din kasi gutom lang ako kaya ako nagsusungit.

"I'm sorry. Am I too much?" He knelt in front of me.

"Actually hindi. I think you're exactly what I need in doing this kasi I really tend to get overboard with things I want to bring. Heavy packer lang talaga ako."

"Oh yeah. Real heavy." Syempre very loaded statement again. He smiled and kissed me sweetly. As if hindi kami nagkakainisan kanina.

"Wag kang mag panggap na hindi mo nagustuhan yon." Sinubuan ko sya ng fries a little forcefully para mabura yung smug look nya sa pagmumukha nya.

"Kelan pa ko nag panggap?" Buti naman he decided we needed to take a break. He pulled me up and dinala namin yung pagkain namin sa dining table.

"Kaya ba hindi ka nag jacket kanina?" I rolled my eyes as we started to eat. Buong araw nya halos binandera yung mga scratch marks nya. But I admit that I smiled everytime I see them, remembering the bliss of last night.

"Sabi nga nila, wear your battle scars with pride." Oh yeah he was really smug about it. "Okay ka lang ba?" He asked me with concern and alam ko naman what he's asking about.

"Yeah uhhh wala ng pain." I felt embarrassed talking to him about this. But who else would I talk about this with kung hindi sya diba? "Okay I was worried kagabi baka nasasaktan na kita."

"Actually di ko napansin masyado." I smiled sheepishly kasi nung umaga ko na naramdaman.

"Hindi nakakagulat Harper." He eyed me, full of amusement with a cute smile playing on his lips. Again, it was so loaded.

"Was it...?" Nahihiya akong ituloy dun sa naisip ko kaninang umaga if mas aggressive ba yung nangyari than how I imagined it to be.

Mas nadagdagan pa yung amusement nya sa mukha while he surveyed me placing his lips on his fingers. Tangina kahit habang sex may nakakalimutan pa ko??? Well hindi naman limot, more of unaware with everything else other than what he was doing to me.

If you're loving the book, nel5s.org is where the adventure continues. Join us for the complete experience-all for free. The next chapter is eagerly waiting for you! "Was it wild?" He chuckled finishing my question for me. I scrunched up my face. Oh I was really out of my straight mind while it was all happening.

"Okay lets see. We were able to mess up your closet. Hindi mo siguro napansin yung lace mong underwear pero icheck mo kung isang piraso pa yon. You almost took my scalp off. Puro ako kalmot. And I had to fix your bed kaninang umaga kasi naurong na sya sa pwesto. So what do you think?" He enumerated with a big smile.

My mouth dropped. "Di ko naramdaman lahat yon." I can really be unbelievable sometimes, but no one can blame me last night. I was so into the pleasure I was feeling, so if we had manage to burn down my condo while doing it, I would have just shrugged it off after.

"Yeah, again, halata naman." His all too satisfied look played on his face once more.

"Yabang mo ha. You owe me an underwear. I liked that one." I stuck my tongue out a little at him then continued eating.

"Yeah I liked that one too. Kahit di ko masyadong nakita." He winked at me.

"Upuan mo babe. Put on all your weight."

"Yan na yun, best ko na yan. Ikaw kaya yung umupo dito." I crossed my arms as I sat on my luggage na pinipilit nyang isara. We just finished with packing my stuff. "I told you I needed 2 medium luggages." "Okay."

"Okay what?" I stood up hoping na mag gigive in sya.

"Okay iuuwi ko yung iba mong damit at ilalagay ko sa luggage ko." ;Xavier sounded exhausted. Dami parin naming pagtatalo kanina kasi I wanted to bring extra 2 shoes and my hair dryer and I think he lost it there.

Nakakatawa pa rin sya over this whole pag eempake thing. Wala talaga syang chill dito and was so serious all throughout. It was actually sexy. Ayoko lang syang sunggaban kasi ang dami ko pang damit na nakakalat kanina. Ay. Possessed ka Harper?

Xavier took out 2 of my coats na naka vacuum bag and the luggage was easily zipped closed. He looked proudly at it. "Eto na yata yung pinaka challenging kong pag eempakeng ginawa. You owe me." I made a face. I'm sure it was because ang kulit kulit ko kanina pa, fussing over my clothes. "Sinungitan mo na nga ako, I still owe you?" I frowned at him.

"Okay, I owe you. Pareho parin naman yung magiging ending nito." Nagulat ako when he suddenly scooped me up and dropped me on my bed and looked at me with dark hungry eyes that set my body on fire. "I hope hindi lace yang suot mo, madadagdagan yung utang ko sayong underwear." Then he kissed me deeply.

Saturday super early in the morning, nasa airport na kami. I was still so sleepy pero excited na talaga ako for this trip kaya walang effort akong bumangon nung ginising nya ko. I slept over naman sa condo nya so we didn't need to take separate Grab vehicles.

We were already at the gate just waiting for boarding, na medyo magtatagal pa. I could barely keep my eyes open ngayon na naghihintay nalang kami and napansin yun agad ni Xavier.

He handed me his phone and stood up. "Coffee?" It wasn't a question kasi alam naman nya palagi lahat ng kailangan at gusto ko. The way we fitted together was so sublime. I just hope na ganun din yung ginagawa ko sa buhay nya, na ganito din yung nararamdaman nya about us.

"Yes please." But before he leaves, I pulled his hand so I can kiss him.

"Grabe Ms. Javier, wag dito. Pinagtitinginan tayo, ang dami pang bata o." Biro nya and lumingon pa around. No one was even staring. I pushed him off to get us coffee.

While waiting for him, still sleepy, his phone sounded a notification. I saw it was from his Instagram. I sat up straight and biglang nagising.

Instagram: TheKylieGuerrero tagged you in a photo

Tangina! Naiirita nako sa ex nyang to ha. I gave Xavier's phone a deathly stare as if gusto kong tunawin yung notification nya.

I took out my phone to see kung anong picture nakatag si Xavier. It was a picture of Xavier in formal wear, mukhang matagal na and it was captioned 'X'.

I seethed. What's with the caption?? Papansin pota! Ganito ba lahat ng ex?? Okay, Harper hinga. The picture was taken no way in the present dahil palagi kaming mag kasama ni Xavier. The picture looked like it was taken nung sila pa. Nanlamig nanaman ako over it.

Relax, Harper.

It might be my first time to handle issues with exes, but I'm never going to lose sleep over this again. Manigas sya sa kaka tag kay Xavier kasi ako naman yung kasama. I'll try to deal with this as graceful and as classy as I can manage. Saka ko na sya gagawing Holly. Xavier came back with two coffees for us and I took one as I handed him his phone pag upo nya. "Thanks babe." I smiled.

Nakita nya yung notification and frowned at it. I was checking kung anong gagawin nya. He showed it to me.  "Yeah I saw that na." I shrugged cooly as if hindi ko muntik ibato kanina yung phone nya pagkakita ko. He exhaled in relief nung nakita nyang mas ok/unbothered yung reaction ko compared dun sa tumawag si Kylie sa kanya.

He swiped to delete the notification without opening it and kissed me on my forehead. "Xavier." I hesitated, but I wanted to be sure. Validated. He looked at me waiting for what I'm about to say or ask. "Am I going to lose you?"

I searched his eyes for the answer. Syempre nandon. Transparent as all my emotions towards him.

"Never." He answered unequivocally.