Satan's Hunger

‘It might not be anything to worry about,’ Kaitlyn said.

‘Or it could be.’

‘They could have been just checking the room or … or …’ She stopped at the look on his face. ‘But that’s why you’re here, isn’t it? To protect me.’ She tried to lighten the mood with a smile but it didn’t work.

Jacob grunted.

Kaitlyn swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood. With a twist of her mouth, she looked down at her nun-made dress lying discarded on the floor.

Her eyes skipped over to a cupboard in the corner of the room, then to a chest of drawers. Both were elegant and lovely and she felt a rush of hope that they contained some good stuff within.

She went to the cupboard first, opening it with a gasp. Clothes! Real clothes!

‘Woo hoo!’ Kaitlyn said, pulling out a nice blouse and a pair of navy slacks. ‘I know you don’t like it here, Jacob. But holy cow!’

She pulled them on. They fit perfectly and felt so good against her skin after the rough scratchiness of the nun dress. How did they even know her size?

Next, she hunted in the chest of drawers to find a veritable treasure of fresh pairs of underwear, pyjamas, singlets and more sets of clothes—all girl stuff. ‘I’m afraid there’s nothing here for you, Jacob. I guess they didn’t consider our … situation.’

He didn’t respond.

‘Jacob?’ She turned towards him to find him frowning at the door, arms crossed. Kaitlyn sighed. ‘Leave it, Jacob.’

’I can’t help it. Someone was listening in on us, Kaitlyn. It smacks of an enemy. Not only that but it was … it was private.’

Kaitlyn raised her eyebrows. There was a tendon bulging in his throat. His wings were stiff at his back. His neck was flushed. ‘You’re so angry.’

Unfolding his arms, he raked his fingers through his hair. ‘I know, and I’m sorry.’ He tried to smile but it didn’t reach his eyes. ‘Does it bother you?’

‘No. I kind of like it. You’re more—human.’

Jacob smiled, then frowned. ‘I’d better get changed.’

Kaitlyn stared as he walked over to his pants lying discarded on the floor beside her dress. They’d only just finished making love and yet she already felt the urge to drag her fingers up his muscular abs, to claw her fingers into his big biceps. Kaitlyn dropped her eyes to his crotch. As he bent over to pick his pants up, Kaitlyn watched as the muscles slid over his ribs. After he dressed himself, he went and got his cloak.

Kaitlyn joined him as he struggled to pull it over his wings. ‘Do you have to wear this still? Don’t they know who you are?’

’I don’t even know who they are,’ he said.

He sighed as it sat heavily over his wings.

‘Are you all right?’ Kaitlyn asked as she bent over to pull at the bottom of the heavy fabric, making sure it concealed the ends of his feathers. ‘You look tired.’

‘I’m fine. I’m just worried about you—that’s all. I’m worried about what’s coming next. About who to trust. About whether I’m strong enough to protect you.’

Kaitlyn straightened and pressed her hand to his chest. ‘I wish you wouldn’t. If we’re going to be on the run for twenty years, I want you to be happy.’ She leaned into him, her chin on his shoulder. ’I want us to be happy.’

He wrapped his arms around her. ‘You’re right. I’m sorry.’ He kissed her on the head.

Kaitlyn sighed. ‘Would you stop being so sorry all the time?’ Pulling away, she took his hand and dragged him towards the door. ‘Come on. Let’s go find something to eat.’

They walked into the adjoining room. More warm, morning light glowed through the stained-glass window. It illuminated the large table and fireplace and an old tapestry on the opposite wall. Kaitlyn paused to look at it.

She hadn’t noticed it last night. It was a religious scene, a very violent and bloody one, depicting what looked like a battle between angels and demons. There was so much blood. So much anguish. She swallowed. It looked so lifelike. Too lifelike. Her heart did a little somersault.

‘Why would they hang up such a thing?’ Jacob said in disgust. ‘Stop looking at it, Kaitlyn. Come on.’ Jacob pulled her away as Kaitlyn continued to stare. He dragged her through the door.

‘Watch it,’ Jacob said grabbing her wrist as she stumbled. He yanked her back, steadying her, before she could crash into a figure waiting just outside the door.

‘Sorry!’ Kaitlyn said, flustered and dizzy. ‘Oh, it’s you! Sorry … I mean Sister Beatrice.’ Biting down on her lip, Kaitlyn bobbed her head apologetically.

The nun smiled, blue eyes bright in her pale face, her white habit making her seem paler still. ‘That’s perfectly all right.’ She folded her hands in front of her. ‘I’m assuming you’re hungry?’

‘Very.’

‘I will have breakfast brought to your room shortly. I also came to make sure that you’re happy with everything.’

‘More than happy,’ Kaitlyn said. She tugged at her new pants. ‘Thank you so much for the clothes. I really appreciate it.’

The nun smiled. ‘You’re most welcome.’ She raised her eyes to Jacob. ‘And how is everything for you?’

‘Satisfactory,’ he said in a tone that made Kaitlyn look at him sharply. ‘Though it concerns me that someone has been spying on us.’

The nun’s eyes widened. ‘Spying on you?’

‘Someone was outside our door not thirty minutes ago, listening in on us.’

The nun frowned. ‘I’m-I’m very sorry. I cannot believe that happened. Are you certain?’

‘I am certain,’ he said in a low voice.

‘Jacob,’ Kaitlyn warned.

The nun straightened and lifted her chin. ‘I will let Father Randolph know immediately. Again, I’m very sorry.’

Jacob grunted.

The nun was a little stiff as she nodded at them both. ‘Your breakfast will arrive shortly.’

‘Thank you,’ Kaitlyn said again. The nun turned and walked back down the hall. ‘And thanks again for the clothes,’ Kaitlyn called after her.

‘Jacob,’ Kaitlyn said, turning on him. ’I know you’re angry but you can’t be nasty. It’s not her fault.’

‘I wasn’t being nasty. I was just voicing my concerns.’ He watched as the nun turned the corner. ‘I might find Ezekiel and have him guard our door. And maybe I’ll get Catherine to patrol the corridors.’

‘If you think it’s best,’ Kaitlyn said. ‘I wouldn’t mind seeing them all again. I miss them.’

Jacob smoothed her hair behind her ear. ‘I’m sure they miss you too.’

Kaitlyn took his hand. ‘Come on, let’s go back inside. I can’t wait for breakfast. I hope it’s something hot.’

Ten minutes later and Kaitlyn discovered that she had cause to hope: sausages, ham, eggs, hot coffee—the works.

‘Thank you,’ Kaitlyn said to the two young men who brought their trays in. She watched as they left, wondering who they were. Once the door clicked shut behind them, Kaitlyn turned to the table.

As Kaitlyn filled her plate, Jacob looked on uncertainly.

‘What are you waiting for?’ Kaitlyn said as she bit into the tip of a sausage. ‘Eat!’

Hesitantly, Jacob reached out and stabbed his fork through a thick slab of ham. ‘This is meat.’ He held it in the air, a doubtful twist to his mouth.

‘And? Don’t worry. You’ll like it.’

He stared at it a moment, then shut his eyes and quickly stuffed it into his mouth.

‘Jesus, Jacob. It’s not that bad.’ Kaitlyn tried not to laugh.

She watched his face. At first it was all pinched up, his mouth twisted around his big mouthful. Then he gave a massive swallow and his face smoothed out. His eyes snapped open and he looked at her in surprise.

Kaitlyn laughed. ‘Good. Isn’t it?’

Reaching over, he stabbed his fork into another large chunk.

After two full platefuls, Kaitlyn put down her fork. There was an egg, a slice of cheese and half a sausage still left, but they were going to have to stay there. She watched as Jacob kept eating, mouthful after mouthful after mouthful. He took several deep gulps of orange juice.

‘You’d better be careful,’ Kaitlyn said. ‘Or you’ll make yourself sick.’

He grinned at her as he scooped up his fourth egg.

Twenty minutes later and they were back in their bedroom, Jacob lying on the floor, groaning, as Kaitlyn rubbed his stomach. He’d stripped off his cloak and his wings were spread out behind him. It looked like he was lying on a bed of feathers. They were so huge they took up most of the floor. He was sweating and panting. His belly was distended.

‘Poor baby,’ Kaitlyn said, unable to stop grinning. ‘You really need to practise being a human more.’

‘How do you do it?’ he groaned. ‘How can you control yourself?’

Being careful to step around his wings, she fetched a pillow from their bed and slipped it under his head. ’I don’t know. I’ve never really thought about it before. You just do.’

He groaned again as he rolled onto his side. Kaitlyn patted his shoulder. ‘I’ll go and see if I can get something for you.’ She stood.

Jacob either didn’t hear her or didn’t object, curling up into a ball with another groan.

As she stepped out into the adjoining room, Kaitlyn glanced at the table, swallowing down the laughter bubbling in her throat. It was good to be silly sometimes. Her eyes brushed briefly over the violent tapestry before she stepped outside into the hall.

It was empty.

Kaitlyn walked down it, admiring the huge paintings and arched windows. Outside was the garden, filled with flowers and colourful shrubbery. The hedges were perfectly manicured. She could hear the fountain splashing. She couldn’t wait to explore it.

Turning a corner, she found herself in the large front room with the domed ceiling they’d first stepped into last night.

Kaitlyn looked around in awe. Brightened by the morning light, it was even more glorious than when she’d last seen it. She leaned her hand against one of the tall marble pillars. What was this place? Where was she?

‘Kaitlyn?’

Kaitlyn turned in surprise. ‘Sister Beatrice. Good! I was looking for you.’

The woman walked over, hands in her pockets, her habit swaying around her ankles. ‘Did you need something?’

‘Yes. Um … Jacob isn’t feeling well. I was wondering if you had some digestive tablets or something?’

The woman raised her eyebrows. ‘Did the food make him sick?’

‘Oh, no, no.’ Kaitlyn said quickly. ‘Your food was great. He-he made himself sick.’ Again, she had to swallow down her laughter.

‘Oh. Yes, we’ll have something. Follow me.’

They left the domed room and turned down another hall.

‘Thank you. He’ll really appreciate it.’ Kaitlyn cleared her throat. ‘And I’m sorry for the way he spoke to you before. He’s not usually so angry. It’s just … he’s going through quite a lot.’

‘There’s no need to apologise. I’ve taken it up with Father Randolph. We will investigate.’

Kaitlyn nodded. The nun walked slightly ahead of her as Kaitlyn followed. They were silent, their footsteps echoing against the walls. Two men dressed in long brown robes walked by cradling books. They looked at Sister Beatrice, then away again.

‘So, your angel is feeling unwell, but how about you?’ the nun asked.

‘I’m okay, thanks.’

The nun’s eyes searched Kaitlyn’s. ‘Are you sure?’

‘I’m sure.’

The nun looked away. ‘So resilient. You must be under a lot of stress. I cannot imagine it.’

Kaitlyn frowned. ‘What do you mean?’

‘You know what I mean.’

Kaitlyn stopped. The nun stopped, turning to face Kaitlyn with unexpectedly hard eyes.

Kaitlyn’s throat turned dry.

The nun shook her head. ’You poor thing. To have the weight of the world on your shoulders. To have the weight of humanity to bear. I could not do it.’

The nun sounded sincere—and yet didn’t. The hardness hadn’t left her eyes.

Kaitlyn lowered her gaze, confused. ‘You—you just deal with it, I suppose.’

‘Come along,’ the nun said, walking again. ‘We’re almost there.’

Looking down at the floor, Kaitlyn chewed over her words.

‘Just in here.’ The nun pushed open a door to their left. They entered a small, surprisingly modern kitchenette, currently empty. There were dishes in the sink. A dishwasher was running. A tall fridge sat in the corner, humming quietly. The nun opened a drawer and searched around. ‘I know there’s some in here.’

To have the weight of humanity to bear.

Kaitlyn bit her lip. A variety of objects rattled loudly around the drawer as the nun continued to search.

‘Here you go,’ the nun said, handing over a packet of tablets. ‘For his indigestion.’

‘Thank you,’ Kaitlyn said, taking it. She looked down at the box as she played with it.

‘Is there something wrong? You look … lost.’

Kaitlyn shook her head. ‘It’s nothing. Just thinking.’

Gently, the nun took her elbow. ‘I’m sorry. Did I say something wrong?’

And the way she said it made Kaitlyn lift her eyes. The nun was watching her, unblinking, with her hard blue gaze.

Her heart is filled with snakes.

Kaitlyn stepped back. The nun’s grip slipped from her elbow. ‘You’re doing this on purpose.’

‘Doing what on purpose?’

‘Making me feel bad.’

‘About being alive? About putting the whole world at risk just so you can live?’ The nun was motionless, expressionless.

Father Bartholomew’s blood flashed across Kaitlyn’s mind, an impossible glaring red. I’m sorry for this, child. But it must be done. To save the Earth. To save humanity and its billions of souls.

Kaitlyn looked around the kitchen in dread, remembering the man with the knife.

‘Don’t worry. I’m not going to hurt you,’ the nun said. ‘That’s a sin. And I’m not so cruel.’

Kaitlyn’s throat was like sandpaper. Her heart was pounding.

‘I only want to remind you that you have a choice.’ The nun folded her hands politely in front of her, as though she was harmless. ‘That all of this terror could end through one simple act of bravery. No one would lose their loved ones. No innocent people would have to die. No child’s soul would be lost to the darkness.’

‘What-what are you talking about?’ Kaitlyn reached for her necklace.

’You know what I’m talking about. Don’t misunderstand me. I have the greatest sympathy for you. I would never in a million years want to be in your position. But if I was …’ She let her sentence drift.

‘You would what?’ Kaitlyn asked.

‘Surely, you must have thought about it.’

Kaitlyn turned cold as she remembered the razor she’d hidden in her pocket. It seemed so long ago now. ‘Isn’t it a sin?’

‘Not when it’s for the good of the world.’

Kaitlyn opened her mouth but could find nothing to say.

‘People are dying, Kaitlyn. Women and children. The innocent.’

Kaitlyn’s heart skipped a beat. ‘What do you mean?’

The nun reached deeply into her pocket. Kaitlyn froze as she again thought of the knife, but the nun only pulled out a phone. An iPhone to be exact. Kaitlyn felt an absurd desire to laugh—a nun with an iPhone.

The woman looked well-practised as she swiped her finger across the screen. She handed it over. ‘Here. See for yourself.’

It was a news report about a multi-car pile up in California. Kaitlyn frowned. ‘What’s this got to do with me?’

The nun held out her hand. Puzzled, Kaitlyn gave the phone back.

The nun scrolled through her phone again. Landing on something, she handed it back to Kaitlyn, who took it reluctantly. This time there was a news report about a church burning somewhere in Texas. It made Kaitlyn’s heart race a little but it still proved nothing.

Kaitlyn handed the phone back, starting to feel annoyed. ‘People burn down buildings all the time.’

Mouth thin, the nun went back to her scrolling. She went to hand it over again. With a small curl to her lip, Kaitlyn took it.

It was an article about a woman drowning her children in her backyard pool. Kaitlyn almost threw the phone back.

‘That’s enough,’ Kaitlyn snapped as the nun began scrolling again. ‘Don’t bother showing me anymore. I don’t know what you’re trying to prove but this has nothing to do with me.’ Kaitlyn shoved her hands into her pockets before the nun could see how they trembled.

‘Oh, but it has everything to do with you,’ the nun said steadily, blue eyes boring into Kaitlyn’s. They were more than hard now; they were like chips of ice. ‘You just refuse to see. All over the country these things are happening. Churches are burning. Children lay sick and dying. People are shooting each other. All of this is the work of the devil. If you are captured, this is only going to get worse.’

The nun was holding out the phone to her again—as though Kaitlyn would take it!

Kaitlyn stepped back. ‘Thanks for the tablets, but do me a favour and don’t speak to me again. Don’t come to my room. I don’t want to see your face.’

And with that, Kaitlyn stormed away. Marching down the hall, she kept her eyes to the floor as she fumed. The nun was nuts. What the hell was she playing at?

She’d just turned the corner into the domed room when she stopped and looked up at the call of her name.

‘Kaitlyn!’ Jacob rushed over. ‘Where’ve you been? I told you not to leave my side.’

He was frowning, his eyes bright with anger. He hadn’t done a very good job putting his cloak back on. It was skewed and she could see the ends of his white wings dragging along the floor behind him.

‘No, you didn’t,’ Kaitlyn said, biting down on her lip as she tried not to reveal her anger. Realising her fists were clenched, she relaxed them.

‘Well, I’m telling you now.’ He gripped her shoulder a little too hard. ‘Where have you been? What have you been up to?’

‘I just wanted to get you something to make you feel better.’ Forcing a smile, she held out the now crushed pack of digestives.

His forehead furrowed. ’No need to worry about me and my foolish issues. It is your safety and comfort that is top priority.’

‘It’s safe here, Jacob.’ Unusually, she sounded convincing. Kaitlyn took his hand. ‘Come on, let’s get you back. You’re looking a little pale.’

‘I’m fine.’

But he didn’t resist as she tugged him back down the hall. As they entered their adjoining room, she saw that somebody had already cleared the dishes. The large table was wiped clean. The chairs were pushed in. They’d even set up in preparation for lunch—though she doubted either of them would eat anything. Positioned in the middle of the table was a bowl of fruit.

Next, when they entered their bedroom, Kaitlyn saw that somebody had made their bed. Kaitlyn screwed up her face. Someone had been in their room. As much as it was a nice gesture, this wasn’t a hotel and they weren’t ordinary guests. And she began to think that maybe Jacob was right. Maybe they should have someone guarding their door. Particularly after her confrontation with Sister Beatrice.

Her heart is filled with snakes.

She looked at Jacob and saw in his face that he was thinking the same thing.

Kaitlyn helped him out of his cloak. He was trembling as he climbed into bed. His wings were drooping at his back. His cheeks were drawn. Kaitlyn grimaced. How long would it take before he was completely recovered from his transformation?

A lot of sacrifices had been made in order to protect her. Sacrifices that shouldn’t have happened in the first place—if she’d been braver. Why had she changed her mind about simply ending it? Why had she not considered it since that time with the razors? Maybe she really was selfish. Despite how crazy and cruel Sister Beatrice was, she had a point. This could all end so easily—if Kaitlyn had the courage.

‘Are you all right, Kaitlyn?’

Kaitlyn jerked back to reality. She’d been staring into space, Jacob’s cloak folded over her arm. ‘Sorry, I was just … thinking.’ Kaitlyn forced a quavering smile.

Jacob narrowed his eyes. ‘What’s going on? Don’t keep secrets from me.’

Kaitlyn turned to hang up Jacob’s cloak. ‘I was just—I was just thinking about life and death. About my parents. About God.’ She turned towards him, unafraid to meet his gaze. Everything she said was the truth, after all. ‘You’ve been there, haven’t you? Heaven?’

Jacob nodded. ‘I have. Though I don’t refer to it as heaven.’

‘Really? What do you call it?’

‘Home.’

‘Home,’ Kaitlyn repeated. ‘That sounds nice.’ She joined him in the bed. He lifted up his arm as she cuddled into his side, his wing like a pillow against her head. She smoothed her fingers over his chest, making sure to keep her eyes lowered so he couldn’t read anything in her face that might betray her. ‘What’s it like?’

‘Peaceful. Calm. Beautiful. But it’s hard to describe. If you’re imagining fluffy white clouds and beautiful people with halos, I’m afraid you won’t find it.’ He brushed his long fingers down her shoulder as she continued to stroke his chest. ’For a human, it is a repeat of the happiest days of their lives, where they can once again meet the people they loved the most and relive their greatest moments. And for those who didn’t experience much happiness, it is however they want to imagine it. So I guess I should ask you,’ he tapped her nose, ‘what heaven is like.’

Kaitlyn pressed her face into the nape of his neck, careful to conceal her tears. ‘All my moments with you, of course. From beginning to end. Every single one.’

‘So I guess I’ll be seeing you in heaven.’ He laid his hand upon her head.

Taking a shuddering breath, Kaitlyn pressed her lips to his sternum. ‘I guess so.’ She steadied the tremor in her voice. ‘I love you.’

‘I love you too.’ His words were starting to slur.

It took hardly any time at all before he fell asleep. All he did was close his eyes—and that was it. Out like a light. He looked so peaceful. Kaitlyn took a moment to watch the gentle rise and fall of his muscular chest; to study the luscious bow of his lips as they pressed together, creating lines around his handsome mouth. How she loved to kiss that mouth. His strong arms were limp. His wings were relaxed. He looked so vulnerable. Every curve, every angle, every trough between bone, muscle and tendon cried out to be touched.

Another time, maybe.

Carefully, Kaitlyn pulled away. Jacob turned his head but didn’t wake.

Tiptoeing across the room, she quietly opened the door. She glanced at him one last time before clicking it shut behind her.

Kaitlyn didn’t really know what her plan for the day was. She didn’t want to leave the room, just in case she encountered Sister Beatrice again. And she wasn’t tired enough to sleep. Maybe she could read a book? Kaitlyn huffed. She doubted she could concentrate enough to read a single word. She glanced at the now clean table, then over at the bookshelf, before resting her eyes upon the tapestry. Staring, she gripped at her necklace.

Bloodied feathers. Tortured faces. Blood. Pain. Death. She could almost hear the screaming. Even in their torment the angels looked magnificent. One of them even looked a little like Jacob, his beautiful face contorted in agony, his stunning wings soaked in blood. Such a terrible image. Such a horrible tapestry. What was the scene supposed to be about?

And then she realised that this could very well represent their future. A future gone to hell. A snapshot of what was to come if Satan got his way. If he took Kaitlyn and conquered the Earth.

Jacob … Jacob would be a victim as much as anyone, angel though he was. The same with Zeke, Catherine, Samuel and David. Would God’s power be enough to protect them? And what about all those Kaitlyn loved? What about her friends and family? Everything and everyone she knew and loved would suffer. Did their lives mean less to her than her own? Could she be that selfish?

Samuel’s voice came back to her so clearly that she turned her head as though he was whispering in her ear: We have to be realistic—our chances of winning are slim.

Kaitlyn tightened her grip on her necklace.

I only want to remind you that you have a choice. That all of this terror could end through one simple act of bravery.

Kaitlyn continued to stare at the tapestry, at the nearest angel’s screaming face.

One simple act.

And this could all be over.

Wrenching her eyes away, Kaitlyn turned back to the door. Feeling strangely cold, she opened it and rejoined Jacob in their bed, suddenly needing his warm, loving touch more than ever before.

Her arms broke out into goose bumps. Her stomach was in knots. Jacob’s eyelids fluttered as she snuggled into him. Lifting his wing, he curled his arm around her shoulders and pulled her in close. His eyes remained closed, though he was smiling.

Kaitlyn shut her eyes with a sigh.