Ruled by the Blaze (The Unwanted Marriage)

PATRICIA'S POV (Last Interaction)

"Kamusta ang therapy mo? Ayos lang ba?"

Ngayon lang ulit ako nabisita ni Jess sa bahay since nag simula na ulit ang class niya. As usual, she asked about my conditions and brought me foods. "It's my last therapy yesterday and it was...awesome"

Nakahiga siya sa kama habang ako ay inaayos ang ilan kong mga damit.

"Your last therapy? Why? Are you okay now?" she asked worriedly. "And why are you fixing your clothes? Going on a vacation?"

Napatigil ako sa ginagawa at nilingon siya. Abala siya ngayon sa cellphone.

"A-Ayos na naman ako, Jess. Hindi ko na kailangan ng therapy,"

Hindi ko pa pala nasabi sa kanya ang balak kong pag alis. Sigurado ako'ng hindi niya magugustuhan pero maiintindihan niya naman, just like my parents. Noong una ay hindi sila payag pero kalaunan ay napagtanto nilang para sa'kin din ito. Mom almost cried that day, they were so sad.

In the past few days, I went through the necessary papers that I'll be needing including my visa.

Mahirap din sa'kin ito lalo na at unti-unting lumilipas ang araw, malapit na ang pag alis ko.

"J-Jess..." tawag ko sa kanya at medyo kinakabahan. "May sasabihin sana ako,"

Dumapo sa'kin ang mata niya at umupo sa harap ko. "Ano 'yon?"

Umiwas ako ng tingin at huminga ng malalim. I bit my lip when I saw her innocent eyes waiting for what I had to say.

"Pupunta na ako sa states..." I almost whispered.

Her smile disappeared and lips parted, then she frowned. "You were leaving? Are you kidding?"

Umiling ako na parang paslit bago hawakan ang kamay niya.

"Sasabay na ako sa mga pinsan ko," nahihirapan kong paliwanag. "You know, I want to forget all the painful things I've experience-"

"I understand," she cut me off and smiled shortly.

But I could see the tears in the side of her eyes.

"You don't need to explain, it's really good for you though. Kahit gusto kong pigilan ka, hindi naman pwede. Desisyon mo yan, e"

Niyakap niya ang braso ko at naramdaman ko na ang panginginig ng balikat niya.

"I always thought that this day will come..."

Ngumiti ako at hinaplos ang buhok niya. Iyakin talaga siya.

"Pero malungkot din, Patricia..." her voice cracked. "Unti-unti na tayong nagkakahiwalay na magkakaibigan. Si Kelvin nasa Paris, si Tyrone busy sa ipapatayo niya'ng business tapos ikaw...aalis na rin," I bit my lip and tried my best not to cry.

"Babalik din naman ako rito, Jess," pampalubag loob ko.

"Kailan pa? After 5 or 10 years?! Ano na kaya ang lagay mo pag nagkita ulit tayo?"

Umiling ako habang natatawa. "I don't know...pero babalik ako. Kapag umalis na ako, sa susunod na pagkikita natin, pareho na tayong doktora. I will probably continue my studies there..."

Tiningala ako ni Jess na nanlalaki ang mata. "Oh, right! It's really good for you to stay there! Para naman malibang ka roon at makalimot..."

Itinuloy namin ni Jess ang kamustahan habang nasa biyahe kami. Nag desisyon siya na kumain kami sa labas at gumala kung saan. Pumayag na lang ako dahil hanggang ko na lang din siya makakasama. Dahil kapag umalis na ako, wala na ako'ng makakasama roon. I will surely miss her.

-

Ilang araw na lang at aalis na ako kaya sinulit ko na ang mga gusto kong gawin. Noong nakaraan na araw ay nagkaroon kami ng maliit na party dito sa bahay para sa pag alis ko.

Kasama ang mga pinsan at syempre, si Jess at Tyrone.

And today, I will visit Agatha.

Sumakay na ako sa back seat ng sasakyan nila daddy. Driver ang kasama ko ngayon.

"Kay Agatha po tayo pupunta..." I informed the driver.

Tumango naman ito at nag maneho paalis.

Dumaan din kami sa flower shop at pumili ako ng magandang bulaklak na babagay sa kanya. Habang nasa biyahe ay nakangiti lang ako. This will surely the last time that I'll visit her. Since I'm going abroad, it will takes years before I could see her again.

Nakarating kami sa memorial at ako na lang mag isa ang pumunta sa puntod. Nanatili ang driver sa loob ng sasakyan.

Naglaan din ako ng bulaklak kay lolo bago nakangiting inilatag sa ibabaw ng puntod ni Agatha ang bulaklak para sa kanya.

"Hello there my baby..." malambing kong usal.

Itinupi ko ang laylayan ng suot kong dress at dahan-dahan umupo. Hinaplos ko ang lapida niya. I could still felt the bitterness inside my heart. How I wish it's already vanished the next time I visit her.

"I'm already leaving, Agatha" I let out a sighed. "I'm leaving you for now but don't worry, I'll be back. I'll be back for you,"

My eyes started welling up so I annoyingly wiped the tears in the side of my eyes. I promised myself that I won't cry in front of her.

"I promise that when I visit you again, I'm already a stronger version of myself," nanginig ang boses ko at parang may bumabara sa lalamunan. "I'm sorry, your mom was too weak that she need to left just to heal herself..." Tuluyan ng bumagsak ang luha ko. Kinuha ko agad ang tissue sa bag at pinunasan 'yon. I can't help but to cry, damn it!

I still stay for more than 30 minutes. Watching her grave intently.

I also took picture with her. Para kahit nakaalis na ako, may titignan ako'ng litrato naming dalawa.

Tahimik ako'ng nakatingin sa kawalan ng marinig ang ilang yabag sa likuran ko. Lumingon ako at nanlaki ang mga ng makita si Callum.

I got stiff but I'm still able to stand up. I frowned while looking at him.

"W-Why are you here?" I asked seriously.

I lowered my eyes on his hands that was holding a bouquet of flowers.

Nainis ako dahil hindi siya nagsasalita.

Nanatili lang siya'ng nakatitig sa'kin gamit ang malamlam na mata. His eyes were full of pain and...longing. Wala ako'ng nakita na iba niya'ng kasama. It's just the two of us here. "I'm asking you-"

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"I'm here to visit her and...to see you,"

Kumalabog ang puso ko ng muling marinig ang boses niya. Gusto kong sampalin ang sarili dahil sa nararamdamang luha na nagbabadya na naman tumulo.

Naging blangko ang utak ko. Pareho lang kami nakatitig sa isa't isa at hindi nagsasalita. I can't believe I'm seeing him right now.

Nanginig ang katawan ko nang humakbang siya palapit. Inilagay niya ang bulaklak sa puntod ni Agatha bago muling bumaling sa'kin. Mas malapit na kami ngayon sa isa't isa. Walang sabi-sabi ay bigla niya ako'ng niyakap.

Naestatwa ako at umawang ang labi.

"Damn, I miss you..." he whispered in a strained voice.

Para bang natuod ako at hindi siya nagawang itaboy. Sobrang higpit ng yakap niya na para bang nangungulila. Mas nangilid ang luha ko ng maamoy ang pamilyar niya'ng pabango.

"Miss na miss na kita..." aniya at mas humigpit ang yakap. "Your face, smell and cooking. I miss everything about you..." nanginginig ang boses niya.

"B-Bitawan mo ako..." sabi ko sa gitna ng panginginig. "Stop t-touching me"

Dahan-dahan siya'ng humiwalay sa yakap at diretso ako'ng tinignan. Napapikit ako ng maramdaman ang kamay niya'ng masuyo na pinunasan ang luha ko diretso sa pag haplos ng aking mukha. Medyo lumayo ako sa kanya at pinunasan ang sariling luha. "G-Get out of here!"

Hindi siya natinag.

"Pati ba naman dito, itataboy mo ako?" nasasaktan niya'ng usal. "Kailan ka kaya mapapagod na itaboy ako?"

"I have so many reasons to despise you!" I said, trembling. "You're the reason why I lost her, Callum..."

Sinalubong ko ang malamlam niya'ng mata.

"You...you make me so stupid!" my tears rolled down again. "You killed my child-"

"Our child, Patricia!" he corrected with so much pain. "I'm so sorry! I deeply apologize about that. It's not really my intention-"

"Just shut up and leave!" I shouted crying. "Stop explaining, please..."

"You will really throw our relationship like that"

Kumirot ang dibdib ko. "There's no reason for us to continue our relationship-"

"We still have reason, Patricia" mariin niya'ng sabi at tinignan ako sa mata. "I love you. Our marriage. Isn't it enough-"

"That's bullshit!"

Sumabog ang luha ko sa sinabi niya. How dare him.

"You don't love me that's why you cheated! You fooled me! You made me suffer when in fact, I should enjoying myself and reaching my dreams!" I shouted so loud. Good thing that there's no people around.

"You really think that I didn't love you?" he sounds disappointed. "That's why you make up with that annulment?"

"That's the right thing to do!"

"It's not. I'm begging, Patricia. Come back to me, let's fix this..."

If you're loving the book, nel5s.org is where the adventure continues. Join us for the complete experience all for free. The next chapter is eagerly waiting for you! Nakagat ko ang labi at muling napaiyak nang masuyo niya'ng hawakan ang kamay ko patungo ulit sa isang mahigpit na yakap.

Humagulgol na ako habang umiiling. No, it's wrong. I shouldn't let him get near me again but what I am doing?

I weakly pushed his chest but his hug only got tighter.

"Let go of me, please..." I begged between my sobs.

I felt him shook his head and murmuring something.

"Wag kang umalis, Pat. Wag mo ako'ng iwan dito na sirang sira..." narinig ko ang hikbi niya. "I know...I know you were going abroad,"

Napatigil ako. Alam niya? Alam niya na aalis ako?

"Just sign the annulment and we're done, Callum!" I said and tried to push him again. "Wag mo na ako pahirapan..."

"Ako ang wag mong pahirapan, Pat" bulong niya. "Hindi ko kaya. Pinagsisisihan ko lahat na hindi ko sinabi sayo ang ibang bagay. Nawala ang anak natin dahil sa'kin. Masakit din 'yon sa'kin at nagsisisi ako. Ayusin natin 'to, please?" Parang hiniwa ang puso ko ng kumalas siya sa yakap at dinungaw ang mukha ko.

His eyes were bloodshot now. I can't look at him directly. Like me, he look so wreck and we're both crying.

"Yung pag file mo ng annulment, hindi ko na kaya..." nangungusap ang mata niya at hinaplos ang kamay ko. "Pero yung aalis ka at iiwan ako...mas lalong hindi ko kakayanin, Pat"

Lumaglag ang panga ko nang lumuhod siya sa harap ko at niyakap ako sa baywang.

"If I have to kneel even in front of our child, I will. Just for you to forgive me..." he sobbed. "Promise, I will be the best husband for you. Just gave me another chance,"

He continued sobbing. "Damn, you made me so whipped and crazy like this..."

My tears keep rolling.

I covered my mouth because of the sobs that want to let out. I can't believe that he's doing this.

"Fucking stand up, Callum!"

Pinilit kong tatagan ang boses ko pero talagang nanginginig ito.

I kept removing his hands around me but I can't!

"Let me go-"

"Mam! May problema po ba?"

Namataan ko ang driver namin na tumatakbo palapit. Bumagsak ang tingin niya kay Callum at nanlalaki ang mata. He was confused for a moment.

"Callum, bitawan mo na ako!" giit ko at pilit humihiwalay. "Starting today, you won't able to see me again! This is what you want, right?!"

Hinila ako ng driver at nakawala ako sa yakap ni Callum.

Now, he looks so wasted and devastated. He looked up at me and slowly stood up while his body were trembling.

"Let's talk, please..."

Akma ulit siya'ng lalapit pero nag tago na ako sa likod ng driver.

"Sir, tumigil na po kayo. Kapag nangulit pa po kayo mapipilitan ako'ng tumawag ng pulis..."

The driver escorted me out of the memorial. I could still hear Callum's cry and shouts, begging and calling my name.

When we got to the car, I felt faint. I dropped my body and continued to cry there.