Once My Mate, Always My Mate

Sabrina’s POV

I pace about in my room, unable to sleep. I sent Xander back to earth because if in fact, he was dying, there was no way I would be able to forgive myself. I thought I had it all figured out. Never did I ever wonder why he was taking so long to heal and if I was ever paying attention during my training.

The only thing I excelled at was combat because I was raised as a beta's daughter and even though I had much to learn in this reality about their style of combat and tapping into my full powers plus strength, it did not take me too long to find my footing, quickly making my way to where I belonged, as the moon goddess.

I want to crawl into my bed and cry, for once again, Xander and I were being torn apart. There was always something keeping us apart and at that time, all else seems useless. What is even the point?

"Penny for your thoughts?" My mother says to me but I roll my eyes because I know she has probably read my mind by now.

Mother walks into my room, walking slowly as if any faster movement would set me off. Here I am, pacing about in my negligee and my mother was too scared to annoy me. What was going on?

"There is nothing I can say that will make this better. Sometimes, for some people, life is better off not planned out for them. I think you are one of those people, the kind that goes with the heart at every turn and every decision you make, you consult the part in you that puts love first before asking for clarity. Love consumes you and every time you have to make the hard decision of sacrificing love for the greater good, you lose it, and rightfully so... But I'm afraid you don't have that luxury. Your life was chosen for you.” Mother says to me and I snort in response.

"Is that meant to comfort me, mother?" I ask sarcastically but she ignores my tone.

"You were born to rule and I hate to break it to you but you are not the first, nor the last to ever have to choose something else over love. Be it family lineage, bloodlines are important in royalty and the fact that you are not with child right now should answer that for you. Maximus might have been a lost effort in fate because then, there were no signs that your time for ascension as the moon goddess would ever come to fruition. Granted, your time would come eventually, seeing as you are immortal, the realm was in no rush to get you on the throne but now that you are here, your time at love has come to an end. Be grateful you are fated, you have someone who once loved you, meaning he can love you again later in life.” My mother says and I sit on my bed to listen. With every point she was making, my life seemed to get darker and darker, falling far away from the light and once again, thrown into a deep pit of snakes parading as the life I was destined for. What I believe to be good for me, is always cast aside and I have people telling me what is good for my life.

For the first time in my life, I have myself thinking of Raylene. Raylene ended up being an alpha child but before then, she was just an omega. Her life was hard but she had an advantage I don't have. She craved my life while I, right now, craved hers. How I wish she was alive and we could laugh about this... Right before I ask to swap places with her.

The thought immediately leaves my mind as Percy comes into view and my heartaches. Yes, those lingering feelings or whatever they are called. I was fated to Percy and even though he died not as my mate, I still cared for him.

"Mother, I know you mean well but right now, I am not in the mood for some guidance or pep talk. I just want to sulk for a few and then get on with my day. I need the night to be distraught so I can tackle it head-on as tomorrow is a new day and I need to wake up with a plan in mind." I say.

"Daughter, you are in no position to sulk. This is Xander's life we are talking about so the decision should have been made the minute the elders told you of his future if he continued to stay here and the fact that you sent him home tells me, you have made that decision already even though you cannot seem to come to terms with it. Do you love him? Set him free. Aiden once again, comes out the victor and I am sure he couldn't wait to spill such painful news, he acted in time before it was too late." Mother tells me.

"Are you saying I owe him a thank you note?" I ask my mom and she smiles.

"All I am saying is, he saved Xander's life, and maybe there is light at the end of his tunnel... He went through something the time he was away and even though I think he is still a sneaky little bugger, there is love in his heart for you... As faint as it is. Give in to the life laid out for you, stop fighting it, and bring sadness to your life. Be happy you have experienced Xander and that you had the chance to feel such a great love, without the influence we have all grown accustomed to. He healed your heart so you can fight another day, let him have his life, little moon." Mother says and she leaves me to my thoughts.

My eyes were dry.

My heartbeat was normal.

The only thing racing was my mind and perhaps mother was right... I did decide to send Xander home and maybe I need to accept it.

"The walls are talking and I heard that your little wolf was sent packing." Cayden waltzed into my room, rubbing his hands together like he had some grand scheme.

"Say if I give you some news that might help your predicament, will you do me a favor?” Cayden asks and I wanted to kick him out. I was just about to but my mouth betrays me and says...

"I am listening..." Cayden, smiling like a sneaky 6-year old that just scammed his grandfather out of all the candy in the house.