OBSIDIAN: Birth to Venus

2121

Jai threw a few outfits into a suitcase and ordered fuel for the jet.

“I’ll be back next week,” she said to Sean, who was standing by the bedroom door.

“Jai, please. Let me fly you.” He ran his hands down the length of her arms, but she broke free. She walked fast into the walk-in closet.

“No, I can do it. Really. I know you’re busy with the gang. I don’t want to burden you. I won’t be gone long.” It only made sense to inter Mom’s ashes at their home in Chiang Mai, where Mom and Dad had erected a columbarium for Darin and the rest of the family.

“Seriously, I want to go, to be with you.” Sean took her hand and pulled her in close. She rested her head, the deepness of his voice resounding in his chest. “She was more a mom to me than my own mother. You know that.”

“Yes, I do.” It brought Jai comfort knowing that. Joy had so much love to give, to all those who surrounded her. She knew how to accept others for who they were. Jai knew she needed to work on that, to accept what Sean told her at face value. He’d insisted he fly her, and he wasn’t one to say something carelessly. He always said what he meant, and meant what he said.

“Good. Then, I’ll meet you in twenty. I just have to make a few calls first.”

Soon after boarding, Jai passed out from exhaustion. By dinnertime, they were in Chiang Mai, sitting in the sala, enjoying the warm night air. It was a welcome respite from the cold winter back home. Sean handed her a plate of food and ate, stopping to aim his fork at her. “I have to say, I’m glad I chauffeured you. You slept most of the way. Just think what might’ve happened if you’d piloted yourself.”

“I know. Thanks. I guess I was more tired than I realized.” Jai wasn’t entirely surprised, though. Since the week before Joy’s death, Jai knew she wasn’t herself. Her sixth sense was like a frayed wire, blaring away. Each beat of Joy’s heart sent an electric shock through Jai’s mind. She was hypersensitive and, after being on edge for so long, Joy’s death had short-circuited her body. Her wires were crossed, melted, and now muted.

Sean caressed her hand from across the table. “What time do you want to go tomorrow?”

“First thing,” Jai said. She headed upstairs, her plate of food untouched.

When she awoke the next morning, Sean was already out, meditating after a morning walk. Jai slipped a sundress over her head and let the thin straps fall loosely on her bare shoulders. Life is for living, she remembered her mother say. She took a deep breath, trying to place her trust in Joy’s words, and walked downstairs. She found Sean stretching on the deck.

“Hey, you,” he said, and wrapped his arms around her waist. “You look beautiful.” He admired the nape of her neck, then kissed her.

“Morning,” Jai said, her voice flat.

He ran his hands through his thick golden brown hair. “Do you want some breakfast? I could whip something up.”

“No, thanks. I don’t have much of an appetite.”

“I know. I haven’t seen you eat anything for days. I know sentients don’t need to eat, but can you at least join me for some thai tea?” Jai nodded. When he returned, tray in hand, she caught herself smiling. He’d paired tea with rotees. “Knew I’d get you,” he said, watching her eat. “You’re a sucker for condensed milk.” He laughed as she finished her last bite. “Now, we’re ready to go.”

Jai walked the path to the garden behind the sala, her mother’s urn in tow and Sean following close behind. They walked up to the pond. It was surrounded by gorgeous fresh flowers. There, in the center, was the columbarium, a granite masterpiece. Dean was etched in the center, and they’d adorned it with marble tulips, intricately carved into the shape of a heart. Siam tulips shaped the left, while Keukenhof tulips shaped the right. Delicate stems comprised each graceful arch; and, marvelous, carved marble blooms burst in memory of the lives they held inside. Jai interred her mother’s remains to the left, to mirror her father’s on the right, locking them together, in a perpetual embrace. There, they’d remain, until the day Jai would honor her mother’s final wish, to release their family’s ashes free in the blue-green ocean. Jai looked at Darin’s spot and sighed at the empty space to the right of his, where her remains were meant to be. Will I ever rest with them? That’s where her heart wanted to be, but her body remained at odds with her emotions. She wondered if those parts of her would ever reunite.