Not A Saint (ENGLISH VERSION)

THREE DAYS has been passed when Brent died. Everyone in the house, the maids, gardener/security guard are aligned in front of me. Ate Luna, Ate Andeng, Yaya Madel, Kuya Kaloy-the gardener, and Mang Badong-the driver and guard at the same time.

"Every one of you knows what happened. I already arranged your last pay in cash. Since Daddy Brent is gone, there is no assurance that I can still handle paying your salary. You know that only dad did it and pay all the expenses in this house," I said as I greet everybody in the house.

Yaya Madel walks near to me, she's the old one who's working under Brent and closed to him as well. She took my hand, her hand is gentle and warm that giving me calmness. She's fifty-three and if she's going to find another job, it will be hard for her. She's not as young enough as others.

"Everyone of here is having sympathy and we giving you our condolences. Sorry for your loss from what happened to sir. Brent. He'd been good to us every one of us and there is no reason that we'll have a grudge or resentment against him. We understand your decision and we know the status of you and your mom's situation. We will accept everything within our hearts," Yaya Madel said while looking into my eyes.

The glint of her eyes is indeed sympathy and pity at the same time. I took my hand and I return to clasp her hand back. "Can I ask a favor, yaya? Can you stay with us? You can work with us again and I will make sure that I can pay... Even not big as what my stepdad has been giving you," I beg at her hoping she will stay.

She gives me a sad smile as she answered, "Sure. I will do that. I even treat you as my daughter, especially when I don't have any. I became an old maid taking care of Sir. Brent."

"Thank you so much," I said smiling as she grants my request.

They gloatingly accepted the envelope that has money inside. Even the month not yet ended but they accepted the payment. I am glad they did. They are all both young and strong, still, they can find work anytime, compares to Yaya Madel. So as Mang Badong. He wanted to move back to Ilocos to see his family and be with them.

Weeks pass by...

I agreed to mom that Brent will be buried, after his funeral and waking days. Mom now becoming stagnant on her drinking habit. She makes Brent her world and even the present still spinning on Brent's ghost. His memories to mom kept appearing when he already died. He died physically and mentally to me.

"Mom, I came back working on the plane as a flight attendant. I got my payment too in the modeling. I ask Manager Roa that Daddy Brent will be bury today," I said as my mom is always having her days with her beloved liquor.

"Who will be managing the company after your father died?" she asked momentarily. She sounded awful and the pain paints all over her face. The gleam of her eyes is all gone.

I shrugged as I can't give her a concrete answer. But as far as I know, the person who is having more shares will be handled next to it after the owner. It is really impossible for mom to do that and manage the company. She's not even capable, not only because of her education but also her experience.

Mom pulls herself up from the corner of her room where she sat. "We need to get ready, the priest might arrive soon," she said in a lifeless way as she started to fix herself and let go of the tequila she is handling. She didn't even finish it.. yet. For sure, she'll come back and drink it all.

On the day of Brent's burial, all the people in the mansion house are present. Almost thirty people came, including me and mom. Maybe Brent is good to them when he was alive. But only for them. Not me. He has never been kind to me after I turned eighteen.

When I scanned Brent's face, looking at us gives me goosebumps. He looks like grinning when his eyes are already closed. The coffin closes as they start to put it down to his grave where he belongs.

He's an a*shole! I despised him until his death and cursed what he did when he was alive. I myself will kill him repeatedly until his next life. 'May your body burned into ashes in hell and even demons will refuse you against your outrages!' I said it in the back of my mind with an image of greeted teeth.

"What are you doing?" I get back to the world as mom started to ask me as if she wanted to nags at me.

"Throw your flower down, Celestine," mom said as his eyes locked at mine when she notices the white flower I am holding.. tightly.

If I could throw some gasoline, I will pour it over him or the bomb is way better as I could watch his body exploded and scattered in every place.

I shut my eyelid firmly as I drop the flower and walk away far as I could.

Other guests started to walk away and leave the place while mom stayed there as if she didn't want to get a new life. She still watching as Brent's body buried deeply until the moment the ground completely covered his body. When he was alive, he was wormed and became completely worming now.

AFTER A MONTH passes by, an old guy around his sixties came to the mansion. He is the attorney who handled Brent's assets that he left. All of us including my mother stiffened. Mom seemed to pass out when we are informed that Brent was likely to donate all the property left to the orphanage where he grew up.

Brent has no family, except us. It is only as a result of his efforts the fruit of his work and treasures he enjoys the most when he was alive that even me, cannot possess it.

Well, as if I like his assets. Nevermind.

"But he will leave the other assets. This remaining house will be given to his wife, Lucia Aberio Marcela-Echavez. And the other shares, like the share in the company, will be given to his stepdaughter, Celestine Rain Marcela Alcazar," the attorney continued reading the testament. "There is one property that he would like to give in the remaining family. The resort in Albay for his wife and the remaining money in his bank account which is worth two million cash." My eyebrows flick. Not that bad. At least there is something he left other than nothing at all.

Brent really tricked us especially me. I thought he'll leave all of his money, assets, and property under my name as he promised. But Brent was actually more cunning than me. He was unlucky as he died earlier than me. He is undoubtedly didn't want to share his blessing in any one of us. What a bada*s!

"T-That's terribly small! I can have a spa for a few months in that two million amount. How are we going to live?" Mom almost screamed in shock and about to cry. Her eyes widened and couldn't believe what the attorney said.

The attorney wearing thick eyeglasses shook his head as he fixed the attaché case containing some papers. "There's nothing I can do, Mrs. Echavez. That's what his last will's content. In case you don't take the inheritance within a month, it will go to the orphanage that Mr. Echavez has been serving for a long time and where he grew up. You should actually be thankful for having this than nothing at all," he finally said beaming his eyes to my mom. The attorney stood up and I offer to receive the elderly man's handshake.

When we finally not hearing the sound of his car and he drove away, mom speaks. "I can't handle a whole company," she said full of sadness. Her Voice is weak as if anytime soon she will cry. She looks like jelly now.

"Even me, mom." Even if Brent were the main shareholder I would never hold the company and the things that went through his palm. I walked back and forth pretending to think and give it a thought. "Hmm... How about selling his shareholdings? I am also thinking to sell the land and building constructed that I received as a gift."

"Can be. If we can sell it in a big amount, we can recover. I don't want to end up my life over this f*cking situation. I don't want to suffer and go back to the past. That's why I'm going to stop working," she said while waving her hand as if it was a fan. Heat starting to boil her for sure.

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"I can still provide you the least, mom. I will still be going to work hard as a model and continue my work as a flight attendant," I said giving her assurance.

"Now we don't have anything to hang on and choose from. It really would be better to find another way than working our a*s off."

I leaned over mom and clung to her arm. "But mom, I can still be able to work and provide even portion of what Daddy Brent did for us," I said tenderly.

Mom confronted me. "That's not going to be enough. I thought you were smart? No one will be enough there. Even if we sell all the ones he left. I will think. I will think of a better idea so we can live and survive together." Honestly, I can see how mom becoming not contented and started to become greedy. Money is just money. We can never bring it to the other world when we die, right?

I just didn't argue anymore. Did I mention that my mom is always right when it comes to decision-making? Yes, she is. I can't even object as long as my mother is in charge of everything and at home, I don't have any rights at all. Even answering or arguing when I know I'm right but I can't voice out.

Fortunately, my savings are safe. I'm thankful that mommy didn't touch it. My mom always respects my privacy when it comes to money.

Less than a month later, Brent's last will testament was notarized, signed by my mother and me, agreeing to what was left for us. The remaining choice we made.

Mom resigned from that company-BE Cosmetics when she found out that Brent sold his shares and he's no longer the CEO but just a Chairman of the company with a scanty share.

Why would mom and even me stay there for so long, especially since Brent leaves bad traces of his memories at the office or at the Mansion house? And if I had the rights, I would also sell the Mansion house. All the things that remind me of Brent I wanted to end it, destroy and erase from my memory or even in the world.

When I got home that afternoon, surprisingly my mom stopped drinking. There are noises of fun and some laughter that could be heard in the hallway as I started to walk by.