Nadir

I’m woken up by a loud knock at the door. I don’t even know how I slept, but I slept for a long time and now I am walking like a zombie to the door.

‘Who is there?’ I ask.

‘Babe it’s me.’

I recognize Joshua’s voice so I open the door.

‘Hey you.’

‘I am sorry for coming this late.’ He apologizes as he enters the house.

I lock the door and join him in the living room.

‘Don’t tell me you slept in here.’ He says looking at my phone and the fleece blanket on the couch.

‘I was working in the kitchen and told myself I would just sit down for a few minutes and here I am.’

‘You are working too hard my love.’ He says coming to kiss my forehead.

I get my phone and look at the time, it’s a few minutes to five in the morning and I am still very sleepy. I hate the fact that I have to wake up soon and start preparing for work. I make a mental note to always go to bed early no matter what.

‘Please let’s go to bed, I am literally a Zombie right now.’

‘You and me both.’ He says.

We go to bedroom and quickly jump in. A few minutes later, I am almost sleeping but then my sleep just goes away at the realization that Joshua and I are in bed together. I haven’t slept with any man in this bed and I haven’t been intimate with any in a very long time; I am suddenly panicking. He wraps his hand around me softly and exhales.

‘Sleep.’

‘I am.’

‘No you are not, your breathing just changed meaning you are fully awake. You need to rest babe, very soon you will need to get up to prepare for work.’

That should put me at ease but it doesn’t. If anything, it makes me even more anxious. It doesn’t take long before he starts snoring lightly and I know he is sleeping. I push the thoughts away and decide just maybe he is one of those good guys I will be in bed with and nothing happens. After ten painful awake minutes, I finally give up and slowly get out of bed making sure not to wake him up.

I go to the kitchen and make myself some strong coffee. I take it whilst going through my emails to see if there is anything I need to urgently attend to at the office. When the coffee is done I clean the house and by six thirty I am in the kitchen making us breakfast.

‘I told you to sleep.’ Joshua says joining me in the kitchen.

He settles on one of the kitchen chairs and yawns, I laugh lightly.

‘I wanted to sleep but I just couldn’t so I decided to make myself busy.’

‘You should stop doing this, you know I love to cook for you.’ He complains as I put his breakfast before him.

‘Babe let us just eat.’

With a deep sigh, he picks up the cutlery and we dig into the food.

‘So why did you come here this early?’

‘I felt bad about not seeing you yesterday and I don’t see my day being any less busy so I thought I see you in advance.’

‘You missed me.’

‘Don’t grow big headed.’ He says pointing a fork at me.

‘By the way babe I needed to talk to you about something.’

‘Okay.’

‘Emmanuel has been calling me.’

He raises an eyebrow.

‘The first time he did it I blocked him but then again he did last night and told me he won’t stop calling even though I block him.’

He puts his cutlery down.

‘Is that why you slept late?’

‘Babe I was working.’

‘I asked you a question Nandy and I expect the truth from you. I don’t want to ask you again.’

‘Yes that’s why I slept late, what was supposed to be a few minutes conversation ended into longer.’

‘You know he slept with your best friend right?’

‘He claims he didn’t.’

‘Yet she does, and you believe him and not her? Your friend of years. Why is that?’

Silence.

‘So what is the end game?’

‘What?’

‘What is the end game between the two of you? You are just talking till two in the morning and nothing more?’

‘It won’t happen again.’

‘Nandy eventually you will fall for this guy. If you keep talking to him till the late hours, you are bound to develop feelings for him and honestly I don’t want to be around when that happens.’

‘And it won’t.’

‘I told you about Ems, I told you about my past with him and yet you went ahead and did the exact same thing I warned you against.’

‘Babe I am not doing anything with him, I am not even going to do anything with him. Why do you think I told you?’

‘Because it’s a narcissist behavior, because you are telling me to make yourself feel good about being honest when you will go back and do the same thing.’

‘Joshua don’t say that.’

‘I have been through this, I am not going through it again.’ He says standing up.

‘Meaning?’

‘Once beaten, twice shy. Sort yourself out Nandy, my relationship with my brother is already messed up, I would rather hold on to whatever is left than fight over you.’

..

Kwenje’s Girl

Winnie

🙇🏾‍♀️