Maliha

Maliha’s eyes flickered open as the early morning light began to peak through her tent. The skyline was still dark with warm peaks of orange, telling her that she had only slept for a few hours if that. Her hand outstretched as she rolled to her side.

Her heart dropped when she realised that no one lay beside her.

She tried to swallow the bitter burn of disappointment, but she couldn’t stop the tears that gathered in her eyes. This was what she had always known would happen. She expected that their profound loving would send Ujarak running but so soon?

Her body felt weak and her spirit low as she climbed from the rumpled and stained sheets that had once cocooned their bodies in the throes of passion. The sheets were cold now and served as a brutal reminder of how she had gambled with her heart and lost. Even though she had predicted this would be the outcome, she couldn’t stop the crippling pain from weighing her down.

Climbing to her feet, she refused to look down at her body and witness the marks of passion that she knew would line her skin. Instead, she slipped on her clothes from the night before and removed the thin sheet that covered the pelt of fur and feathers that made up her and Enzo’s mattress. She placed the dirty laundry in her wash basket and began preparing for the long day ahead.

He muscles were sore and aching from the fighting of yesterday and the love making all throughout the night.

As she reached over to pick up a stray cushion, the tent door swished open and Enzo came strutting in. His small feet pattered on the floor as he made his way over to Maliha and rested his head along her stomach.

“I’m tired,” he murmured sulkily. His big grey eyes implored her to have sympathy on him and let him sleep longer.

“It’s morning Enzo and there is a lot of work to do,” Maliha chided softly.

She desperately wanted to get back into bed and sleep but she knew that there would be a lot to do and they couldn’t afford to lay about.

“I have a council meeting within the hour and I imagine everyone will be up soon.”

Maliha’s head snapped towards the tent entrance in confusion.

“Ujarak?”

Maliha tried to hide her shock at seeing him but she knew he could read her expression.

“I brought breakfast.” He, offered out the plate to them.

Maliha waved him in and began pulling out small bowls and cups for them to eat and drink.

Enzo was barely able to keep his eyes open as he nibbled on food. His head tilting on Maliha’s shoulders for support as he dazedly ate.

“How about this?” She murmured. Maliha combed the unruly strands of hair away from his face, taking note of his adorably puckered face.

“We head to the pool and gather our belongings we left behind and while we are there I can wash some clothes and you can nap.”

Enzo’s hazy grey eyes stared up at her as he slowly agreed.

“Perfect” Maliha hummed.

Her and Uja worked in silence as they cleared away the dishes, wiping them down with water as Enzo dozed on the bed. Ujarak tried multiple times to talk with Maliha but she was staunch in her silence. She couldn’t speak without how showing her emotions and she didn’t want to scare him away with how raw they were.

Once the beds had been rearranged to their normal spaces. They left Maliha’s tent with a sleepy Enzo being carried in Ujarak’s arms. they stopped by a number of tents so Maliha could gather up some of the Der Khatil’s clothes to add to her washing.

Ujarak walked them to the pool and then set Enzo down onto the grass before hesitantly heading off to his meetings.

Maliha went about her day as she always had before her and Ujarak had we’d. She finished washing her clothes, hung them up and then gathered her bag full of foraged vegetable to be sold or cooked, however instead of cooking them, she added them to the starter baskets being made for the Der Khatil.

Enzo played with the children as Maliha spent her day helping the tribe erect new tents and fill the empty spaces with as many homely touches as possible. Some of the Der Khatil had managed to bring things from their old home, whilst many had nothing but the clothes on their back and their lives.

Maliha hadn’t seen Ujarak for the whole day but she didn’t mind that at all, she needed time to calm her emotions and see the situation clearly.

As night crept over the tribe’s land, they all gathered together to sit around extended the fire pit and ate their final meal of the day. Conversation was hushed and barely carried over the ever-present sounds of drums. Enzo ate his food energetically as always, laughing and giggling with his friend Tobi.

Xiuri kept trying to catch Maliha’s eyes but Maliha kept her head bowed. She didn’t feel as interactive as was her typical behaviour, she was tired and irritable and so she kept focussed on the meal in front of her.

Tonight, there had been a reprieve from the boisterous activities. Ciur and her new-born would have their naming ceremony the following night and into the late hours of the morning. Maliha was happy to use the small moment of rest to gather her equilibrium and settle her tumultuous emotions.

She waited for Enzo to become sleepy, before discreetly exiting from the fire with him tucked securely in her arms. It was nice that everyone was uniting together as one whole tribe like she had never seen them do before, but too many eyes were on her. She thought she had avoided all of the prying and curious eyes, but she was surprised by the large body that stood outside her tent.

Silently, Ujarak took Enzo from her arms and headed inside the tent. They both helped get the boy into bed, Maliha trying her hardest to avoid his seeking eyes.

“Maliha,” Ujarak’s growled, growing tired of the situation.

“Can we talk outside?”

Maliha nodded mutely and followed him outside. She sunk onto a small log as Ujarak got comfortable. His large palms cupping hers in his as he leant towards her.

“I didn’t abandon you this morning, I went to get Enzo and make us breakfast.”

“I didn’t ask.”

Maliha tried to shrug out of his touch but Ujarak was persistent in his hold.

“I know you didn’t ask, but I can read your body language. You have been off all day. At first I thought you were just tired but then I realised you were avoiding me.”

“I wasn’t.” Maliha snapped, annoyed that she was so transparent but even more frustrated that she was annoyed in the first place.

She shot to her feet, trying to hide from Ujarak’s perceptive eyes. Maliha felt too exposed and open and she hated the feeling, hated the vulnerability that was so deep within her. She had let him in knowing that she would end up being hurt but actually experiencing the pain of his rejection hurt more than she had imagined.

“Maliha, please,” Ujarak begged, reaching for her body and trying to pull her into his embrace.

“I can’t,” she gritted, trying to fight back the tears.

Maliha couldn’t even say why she was crying anymore. Ujarak had retuned.

His reason had been valid but his actions this morning had made her realise that she still hadn’t healed from the abandonment and neglect inflicted upon her in her youth. Instead of confronting the pain that their callous treatment had created, she had run. Burying the past pain with every month she travelled from her birth tribe.

“I just didn’t want to wake you up,” he whimpered, trying to soothe all of Maliha’s worries away but this was so much more than just his actions.

She felt so weak, she couldn’t even let him see her face knowing what the expression on her face would be.

Betrayal.

Maliha felt betrayed even when she knew he had done nothing wrong, in fact, he had gone out of his way, to do something nice for her but her insecurities wouldn’t let her bask in the kind moment. Instead, she had spent the day allowing her apprehensions to fester until the wounds were too deep to heal with truthful words or gentle touches.

Her body shook as large globs of tears fell down her face. She hastily tried to wipe them away but Ujarak was too fast.

“Goddess, Maliha don’t cry,” He croaked, “please don’t cry,”

“I’m sorry,” she sniffled, burying her head against his chest as she hiccupped into his skin.

“I’m so scared of being rejected again that I overreacted.”

Ujarak tutted his teeth in reproach. His hands palmed her face as she forced her watery eyes to look up at him.

“Don’t ever apologise for the way you feel,” he whispered soothingly.

“You have every right to feel the way you do, and I know I haven’t helped matters in the past but know this Maliha, even when I’m scared of my feelings or our future, I will always talk to you first.”

Ujarak had never been sincerer than he was in this moment but Maliha couldn’t quiet the foreboding feeling. She was crippled by her doubts, paralyzed by the trepidation that streamed through her veins as potent as her blood.

“I won’t run from you.”

“I just know this is going to end bad” she sobbed, fingers cupping her face as she shied away from him.

“Don’t say that” he growled, fingers wrapping around her hand and revealing her naked truth.

He sucked in a harsh breath of air, dread choking his throat. “Maliha, don’t say that.

Being with you and Enzo is the only place I want to be. I want to fight for us, even if that means I need to make decisions I’m not ready for,” he beseeched, imploring her to believe him. This had become his reality.

Weeks apart had weakened his resolve. He could no longer imagine a life where he saw Maliha every day and could not be with her. They had transcended to a new level of their relationship and he wouldn’t go back. He couldn’t, not even if he wanted to.

“I just- How can I feel this way about you, if you aren’t my one?”

Maliha didn’t have an answer. Being with Ujarak felt right. When they didn’t have to worry about the future of this tribe and could just let themselves be in the moment, it was easy for them to feel as if they were meant to be. Maliha felt bonded to Ujarak in a way she had never felt to another human.

He felt right.

When she was in his arms, he felt like home.

Maliha stared at Ujarak languidly, absorbing all of his words and letting them pacify away her mounting fears.

“This feels right to me too Ujarak.” She whispered, palming his bristly cheek.

“You feel right.”

His mouth tipped up in a lopsided grin as he tilted his head down to meet her hungry lips. His fingers glided over shoulder, ghosting along the back of her neck, down her spine until he was gripping her buttocks in a tight grip.

They gasped against each other’s lips, sucking in lungsful of air before they sunk into another soul colliding kiss. Maliha’s mind blanketed, nothing but euphoria and fullness floating throughout her body.

How could this not be right?

She became impatient, tugging at his clothes as they stumbled through the flap of her tent and over to her bed. She cast a hesitant look over at Enzo, but Ujarak’s gifted mouth pulled her away from her worries.

He tugged on the ends of Maliha’s dress until she was forced to follow him into the bed.

They came together in a furious passion full of angst and promises. Their eyes held together as Maliha’s fingers cradled his broad shoulders in her arms as he sunk into her.

Over and over again.

There wasn’t a place that Ujarak didn’t touch her. There wasn’t a moan that she missed.

Sharp pants puffed into the air as she gripped his sweat slickened back. Her fingers raked along his muscled skin as he thrust into a particular spot that had her eyes rolling and stars twinkling behind her lids.

Her mouth fell open in a breathless moan.

“Oh Goddess,” she whimpered, biting her lip as he sunk impossibly deep.

She couldn’t take it anymore. Her eyes shuttered closed in sublime bliss. Her fingers flexing with the urge to grip something as her toes curled with pleasure.

“Look at me.”

He gripped her chin and forced her head up until she was gazing back at him.

“You,” he gasped, body tensing as she fisted his hair. “You are everything.”

Tears stung the back of Maliha’s eyes at the fervency of his words. She felt emboldened by him. Her touches grew frantic as she kissed him ardently.

Her soul cresting and cresting until she was peaking over the edge and falling into nothing but the secure embrace of Ujarak’s love.

Hearts beating in sync and bodies twined together.

They melded into one another.