Lycanthropy

It took several hours and the maximum dosage of painkillers before my body got back to itself again. Mostly.

I had heard what the doctor had said, and Aron had run away from it. He didn’t want to hear my explanation, he didn’t want to understand why or how this could have happened. I never knew it happened for sure either. It was such a long time ago and I never cared to think about it any further. Back in the day I never cared to think about my future, not even believing that in my future I could be with my mate.

But now that I have found my destined man, my true mate, the thoughts of having pups has to swarm in eventually. I am the soon to be Queen, and am a female. So, if I want to keep the bloodline intact, and to be able to pass on the rune of protection, I have to get pregnant and have an heir to the throne.

I never considered becoming a mother, nor do I believe that I could be a caring parent either. But now I don’t have the choice to decide, and nor does Aron.

He got angry by what the doctor had said.

Because, the thing that the doctor had said, wasn’t quite the news that I had expected her to say.

I was actually going into heat, my body wanted to prepare itself to becoming the vessel of a new-born life. But my body wasn’t able to…

I’m not pregnant.

I couldn’t get pregnant.

Memory of a long time ago, kept playing in my mind, over and over again. There where I was in the cells at the arena, waiting to face some devastating torture.

Half sedated, I had awoken a few times on a hospital bed, by the pain that was being inflicted on my stomach. Milos his voice booming in the distance, yelling towards some doctors that if they weren’t able to take it out, they should damage it permanently. At that time I couldn’t understand what he was referring to, but now I do.

The doctors were reluctant to listen to Milos, so he had come in the room further, grabbed a scalpel and rummaged through my stomach. I would heal anyway I had figured, and the pain that he was inflicting upon me, only distracted me from my thoughts to think any further about the details.

Finally after receiving much more sedation, the doctors at the arena had managed to knock me out completely, and I had awoken a few days later. Only to find no scar on my belly, but a still immense pain on the inside. My body wasn’t able to heal that part…

The reproducing part of my body.

I never had known for sure, and thought that the supplements that Milos gave to every woman, was also to prevent us from getting pregnant. But now I did know for sure, as Aron’s doctor had said that my womb was so severely damaged, that it even had tried to heal again, but by probably using silver or wolfsbane, it couldn’t. Not completely anyway.

Not even Terrence knew about this information, as he was only captured a year later. This was my last piece of memory that I hadn’t shared with anyone, not wanting to, and never thought about doing so either. This was my last straw, and I couldn’t build up another wall, after this devastating news.

Milos had not only found another way, to torture my life after his death, but also that of the life of Aron. As he wasn’t going to be able to become a father of his own children. His own flesh and blood.

I knew Aron wasn’t angry towards me, he was angry towards the person who did this to me and he needed to take his own time, for this to digest. I could relate to that, and never judged him for it. We would get together again, I have no doubt about that, but it is going to be hard for us.

“Are we going to get through this?” Dakota asked me sadly

“We have faced too much, to give up now, girl.” I said to her.

“Yes that is true, and I know it is hard to think about pups, but now that we can’t decide for ourselves, it is devastating.” She said.

“I know.” I replied.

Amy came into the room and rushed herself towards me. She gave me a hug and laid herself next to me.

“Oh Em, I’m so sorry for you!” She cried.

I didn’t know what to say, tears were running over my face as well, but I really don’t know how to react to all of this. Amy just took control of me, and hugged me even closer. We stayed like that for a few hours, where I took some other painkillers every now and then, and crawled back into bed with her.

It was in the middle of the night now, but Aron hadn’t returned from his run.

I was slightly worried, and tried to talk to him through the mind-link, but he had shut me off. Tears rippled over my face, and upon hearing me cry, Amy subconsciously hugged me even tighter.

She is my sister, and I love her very much, and this was the first time that I truly needed her. She comforted me and just had let me cry.

The next few days I had to get through the mating heat, that my body was trying to get through. It was destined to have pups with Aron, it must be that, as I had never turned into heat before. But my body couldn’t comply to the need that was there.

To distract me, Amy came into my room every few hours and kept me updated on the situation between Frida and Berrant. Frida had fought against him, and managed to wound him badly on his chest. She didn’t want to talk and tried to push him away, but he kept on pushing for her to listen to him. As a result she had swiped him across his chest with her claws.

I had smiled at that, but it wasn’t distracting me enough to rid my thoughts from Aron.

Nor was Aron going to try and clench the thirst that my body needed. He avoided me like hell, and was busy training and focusing on his other tasks as an Alpha.

I began to miss him, his touch and his talking. So after a few more days of him not sleeping in his own bed, with me, and when the heat was finally subsiding, I had taken a shower and was determined to go and talk to him.

As I opened the door, Aron sat there, across the hallway, in a chair that overlooked the stairs.

I sat myself in the chair next to him, and we both sighed, at the same time.

“Did you know?” He asked me.

“I had my suspicions, but I wasn’t certain. It happened when I was really young.” I replied, and he nodded.

We just sat there for quite some time, looking at the people that came up and down the stairs. We didn’t say a word to each other for about twenty minutes, until he stopped the silence.

“I’m not angry at you though.” He said.

“Yes, I know.”

He turned to me, and looked me in the eyes.

“How do you know?”

“I don’t know. I just do.”

He stood up from the chair, and picked me up from it. I wrapped my legs around his waist and cuddled my head into the crook of his neck. Tears began to prickle again, and I held him even tighter.

“I’m sorry for running, love.” He said, while holding me tight.

He didn’t have to say sorry in the first place, I had no remorse to him whatsoever. But it did comfort me any way. It was nice to hear, that he still calls me ‘love’, even though I couldn’t yet reciprocate that same word.

Or could I?