I'm the Alpha's World

I stand up off the couch and glance out the window to see its still dark. This has been the longest night ever, longer than the nights in the attic, longer than the nights locked in the room. Hopefully I'll have nothing else to compare it too.

I rub my eyes and make sure Sebastian is back in bed by listening very carefully. When I hear no movement I assume he is.

That was rude, my wolf perks up.

Don't talk to me right now, this is your fault.

I don't see the big deal, he loves us.

I ignore her and look around for something to do, which is very limited in the middle of the night.

We should be going to bed.

I groan and try to push her out of my mind even though she's right, I should be asleep beside Sebastian just about now. My heart aches and I sit back down. I made a mistake didn't I?

I love Sebastian, and I want to tell him, but what if he doesn't remember saying it. What if it was just a spur of the moment kind of thing? What if he doesn't actually feel that way?

Why can't I just say it then he says it then I attack his face with kisses!

If only it was so simple.

Why isn't it?

I lean back and think about us, the life that we're going to have. Henry won't shut up about babies, which only makes me more nervous. What if Sebastian doesn't want kids? Well, who would be the next Alpha then? I guess I have to have a baby, a baby boy to be exact. What if it's not a boy? Does that mean I have to have another? What if I never have a boy and there's no one to be future Alpha? Would Henry's kid be the next Alpha?

My head starts to pound from all the questions.

To have babies Sebastian has to not hate me, and I'm sure he's not to happy with me keeping him up.

Why am I even thinking about babies again? Damn Henry.

I don't want things to be complicated between the two of us, but I can't help but blow things out of proportion. I stand up again and take a deep breath before heading upstairs. I'm going to apologize for acting like a child and I'm going to ask him about the three words, okay, maybe not the three words. I don't think I'm mentally ready to talk about that yet.

I slip through the crack of the bedroom door and sigh when I see him hugging my pillow. My heart melts. Quietly I tiptoe over to my side of the bed and push back the covers before crawling in. I hate to wake him up for the millionth time, but I wiggle the pillow from his grasp and quickly move myself into his arms.

A second in his arms, even when forced, is pure bliss.

"Evangeline." He mutters with his eyes closed and pulls me closer.

"Just hold me." I breathe out and cuddle into him.

"Always."

"I'm sorry for closing you off." I peek up at him.

"So are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

I take a deep breath. "Well it's just that, I left my mom then right after I have to go to the doctor, which was very embarrassing. Now I'm sick and I feel like I can't get a break, I wonder what's going to go wrong next. Back to the mom thing, I hate myself for leaving her and I think about it all the time. She may have put me in a attic but it was to keep me safe, and I want to go back for her but I'm scared she's going to be all scary looking. Back to the doctor, I can't get over the fact that she tested if he, touched, me or not. If he did would you no longer want me? Would I be no good? And now I'm sick and I can't fall asleep because my head in pounding and my nose is stuffy, so when I wake up my throat is dry and I can barely breath." I stop rambling and catch my breath. "That's what's wrong"

He slowly sits up and I sit up too. "I wasn't expecting so much." I yawns and pulls me onto his lap. "Okay, if you want to go back to find your mother you will have to speak with your father. Yes, she probably will look scary. Next. I took you to the doctors because I needed to know that he didn't do anything to you, and if he did that would change anything. I would never drop you Evangeline, you're my mate and that's more important to me. And if your still feeing that bad I can get you more medicine or you could try a hot shower to clear things up."

Suddenly a small cry escapes my lips and tears roll down my cheeks. I wrap my arms around him and not dare to let go.

"What did I say?" He panics and pulls away to look at my face.

Without thinking I gently press my lips against his and enjoy the familiar, pleasant feelings it gives me. I can't help but believe his lips were made just to kiss mine. He reacts quickly and our lips move in perfect synchronization, I feel his hands grip my waist and slowly slide up my shirt leaving a burning trace on my skin.

I've never wanted someone so much.

I pull away and lean my forehead against his. I can't help but say it, it's like word vomit. "Do you love me?"

Silence comes between us and I begin to regret asking.

"Yes." His voice is raspy. "I love you, I love you more than anything."

My heart stops, hearing him say it again is like music to my ears. It's a feeling deep inside me that I can't explain, a feeling I've been craving. "I love you too Sebastian."

Immediately he flips us and lays me softly onto the bed sheets, looking down at me with dark eyes. I squirm under his gaze and he connects our lips again. My hair is sprawled across the pillow as his hand snakes up the back of my shirt giving me chills. I run my finger tips up his muscular back, feeling him tense underneath my soft touch.

He breaks our long kiss and sit up on his knees, his eyes roaming over my body as I catch my breath. My cheeks heat up and I can't help but feel vulnerable while he studies me. His rough hands grip my waist again and slip under the waistband of my pajama pants. I bite my lip as his fingers run over my chilled skin, igniting an aching feeling deep in my core.

I can't help but look away as he tugs down my pants, exposing my bare legs.

He leans back down and places soft kisses along my jawline then down my neck, causing me to let a small moan through my lips. Everything feeling so foreign as he kisses along my skin.

I run my hand through his silky hair and softly moan again as he kisses a spot so sensitive on my neck and he continues to gently nip and suck on it. "Sebastian." I breathe out and curl my toes.

He pulls away and briefly kisses my lips before bring his own up to my ear. "Tell me to stop and I will."

A chill runs down my spine as his hands creep up my shirt. I don't want him to stop, not now, not ever.

He begins to push up my shirt, knowing I'm bare underneath. I throw my head back against the pillow. "Don't stop."

He pulls the shirts over my head, the cool air smacks my once covered skin. He leans down again to my ear and gently kisses around it before whispering, "you're too perfect Evangeline."

I grip the sheets at his words and gaze into his eyes that hold so much lust. "I want to."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm very sure." I breathe out and slowly he slides down my panties.