I will never be yours

Selena pov

I'm done for the day and head out of Michael's house before I'm ready to head back, I have a new book in my hand and I would have loved to take a seat outside this evening and read by myself. "Now go back and take a rest, don't take a detour! It will only get you in trouble!” Michael shouts from the window and I roll my eyes at him, could I get in worse trouble than I already am?

"yes, I willl" I say and sigh before opening a portal and walking out right outside the castle, now I'm here, and would it hurt anyone if I stay outside for a bit?

My stomach starts to rumble and there have been several hours since I ate something, these days it doesn't seem to be any stop in the amount of food my body craves.

I sigh and decide to walk inside instead and grab myself something from the kitchen before heading up to the room.

Walking up the stairs to the front door I push it open and head inside, the hallway is empty and I like it that way. Hoping I won't bump into anyone on the way as I did this morning!

When I start to get closer to the kitchen I get this sniff of food and it smells delicious, my mouth starts to water up at the smell and there is no stopping on my feet when I quickly arrive at the kitchen.

Hearing some voices I stop in my track when my eyes land on Emma and Kian cooking dinner while Cannon is setting the table.

The kitchen is just as crowded as this morning and I can come down later when they are done and grab myself something to eat.

Turning around I start to walk back out of there, I won't do this again! I already bumped into them all this morning.

"Selena wait! we are making some dinner and thought it would be nice to have it together!" I hear Emma say and stop in my track for a moment. The food smells delicious but I'm not up to sitting here at a table with him.

"no, it's fine! I will grab something later!" I say and start to walk again.

"Selena stop!" I hear his voice boom out and it sends a chill down my spine, I have missed his voice more than I thought I had.

Hearing his steps walking closer to where I am when I feel him being close to my back.

"you need to eat!" he says and before he gets a chance to touch me I take a step to the side and turn around.

"I can take something later!" I say and keep my eyes on the ground when I hear him take a step closer to where I am

My feet move on instinct and I take a step back when I see his feet stop in front of me.

"stay! You need it!" he says and tries to reach his hand to me when I take a step to the side.

"alright I won't touch you but take a seat at the table!" he says and I hear him take a step back when there are some more moving in the room.

"I have made you your favorite dish! Come" I hear Emma say and I thought I recognized the smell when I walked inside the kitchen. Lifting my eyes from the floor I see her standing by the table and the food is placed in the middle, my stomach instantly starts to rumble.

"I'm not going to take a no! You are hungry!" I hear her say when she walks over and grabs my arm before she starts to pull me with her over to the table and have me to take a seat at a chair.

Placing my book down in my lap when she walks over to the other side of the table and takes a seat, I see Cannon walk over and sit beside her when I hear Kian walk closer to where I am before he sits down beside me.

I feel the warmth coming out from his body when his arm almost touches mine, he reaches over to my plate and I see him place food on my plate before putting it back down in front of me.

Looking at the delicious food in front of me I don't hesitate to start digging in, it has been my favorite food and I don't mind if it's a little bit spicy. I hope it won't cause me a problem to eat while I'm pregnant. Taking my first mouth of the food it's the same taste but not anywhere near being as spicy as it usually is.

"I didn't make it as spicy as I usually do, I don't think it would be good with your pregnancy. Would probably cause you heartburn!" Emma says what I'm thinking and I raise my eyes and look at her, she has food on her plate but she hasn't touched it yet.

"I think it's good!" I say and see her get a smile on her lips before I turn my attention back to the food and start wolfing it down. I where hungrier than I thought or my body simply can't get enough food into its system.

My plate is empty in a short moment and I place my fork down beside it when Kian reaches over and takes my plate to fill it up a bit more.

He places it back down in front of me and that is way too much food, I won't be able to eat it all. "you need more food! You're eating for more than one!" Kian says next to my ear and it's the first time he has acknowledged me being pregnant since that day in the doctor's office. It hits right in my heart and I feel vulnerable, didn't think it would affect me the way it does.

Taking a deep breath I push my walls tighter up against my feelings to cut them off before I take up my fork and start to eat again in silence.

Emptying my plate I feel beyond full and have to sit back in my seat to take a breath, there hardly isn't enough room in my body to let me fill up my lungs with how full I feel.

Lifting my eyes I see the others still eating and I guess I hardly took any breaths before emptying my plate.

His hand comes to my thigh where he places it and it almost feels like it burns through the fabric of my pants, I can't think of anything else than his hand on my thigh when my bladder needs to be emptied like a savior for me to get out of here.

Taking my book I rise from my seat and pick up my plate to walk over to the sink.

"Thanks for the food, I have to go!" I say and head over to place it down in the sink.

"leave it I will take care of it! Don't you want some dessert?" Emma says when I turn around to rush up to the bathroom.

"no thank you! Need to use the bathroom!" I say and rush out of the kitchen without hearing if she said anything else.

Making my way down the hallway I push the door open and quickly rush over to the bathroom before there will be an accident on the floor.

Taking a breath of relief I made it there in time when I empty my bladder, once I'm done I take off my clothes and place them on the sink before I turn around and head over to the shower. I better take a shower now I got this feeling I will fall asleep early tonight and if I lay down on the bed for only a moment I know I won't have any energy to get up again tonight.

Turning on the shower I wait for the water to get warm enough before stepping under the water, still the best time of the day when I'm showering.

Washing up before I let the warm water run down my body like a warm hug, I could stay in here for hours at the time but my exhaustion reminds me I have to lie down instead.

Turning off the water I get out and start to dry my body on a towel before taking it up to dry my hair, looking at my reflection in the mirror I stop in my track when my eyes land on my small baby bump. Today it seems to have grown quite a bit and turn right in front of the mirror I place my hand on my stomach before I look down at it, our babies are growing at a steady pace.

Caressing my bump with my hand I can't explain the love I feel for my children when there is some movement to my side and I turn my head that way only to find Kian standing in the doorway with his eyes looking down on my baby bump. My breath hitches in my body at the sight of him when I see him slowly trace his eyes up my body until they meet my eyes.

His beautiful amber eyes look right at me and I forget where I am for a moment when my heart takes one extra beat in my chest. I'm lost in looking at him for a long moment.