Forbidden: Part One (Luna & Sol Omegaverse Book 1)

I woke with the bed shifting around me, the room still pitch black.

“Sorry, baby girl, go back to sleep.” Cam kissed me on the forehead as he slipped out of bed.

“Where you going?” I mumbled, pressing myself further into the warmth of the sheets.

Yesterday, after breakfast, we’d spent the day cuddling and lounging by the pool. Cam had a similar reaction as Theo to hearing about self-defense, but Ben took it in stride and helped me practice resisting his bark. We’d watched a movie before going to bed early, and I’d fallen asleep pressed between all my alphas.

“We’re going to work out,” Theo said, kissing my cheek.

“Too early,” I responded, disgruntled.

“I completely agree,” Ben said, pulling me towards him and pressing his body against mine.

“Then stay here with me,” I said, nuzzling my face in the crook of his neck and breathing in his rich, spiced scent.

“I wish, precious,” he responded, reluctantly rolling out of bed and tucking the covers around me.

The three of them quietly exited the room, the click of the door letting me know I was alone. I whimpered as I curled up in a ball, covering myself with the blankets. I shouldn’t react this strongly—they spent most of the day and night wrapped around me. But I hated mornings, and having to spend them in bed alone made me feel abandoned.

I drifted back into a fitful sleep, jerking awake whenever I thought I heard a sound. At the Designation Academy, staff members often barged into our rooms in the mornings unannounced. They would yell at us to get up quickly and head to a surprise assembly, uncaring if we were still asleep or in the middle of getting dressed. It taught me not to let myself sleep too deeply. The exception had been the past few days with my alphas. I’d barely had any nightmares, as if my body knew I was safe with them.

I yelped when my phone rang, jolting me fully awake. I fumbled around in the dark until I found it on the nightstand. As I squinted at the bright screen, I registered two things simultaneously: it was eight o’clock on the dot, and my mother was calling.

I stared at my phone, wondering if I should answer. The call would leave me unhappy and stressed, but I knew my alphas and I had to play nice until we bonded.

My cell stopped ringing before I made up my mind. Well, that solves it. I went to lie back down when the phone started ringing again. Who was I kidding? This was my mother—she would keep calling until I answered, and if I didn’t, she would just show up. I didn’t want her intruding in the space that already felt more like home than anywhere I’d lived. I reluctantly answered, trying to make myself sound as awake as possible.

“Josephine, are you still in bed? It is eight o’clock in the morning. We have talked about this.”

“No, mother, I’m not still in bed. I got up bright and early this morning. What can I do for you?” I asked, rolling my eyes.

“I know you’re lying. No one likes a lazy omega. You need to be up early and be a productive member of your pack. You need to cook breakfast for those alphas and ensure you please them and run the home properly, just like I taught you.”

I tried to hold in a long-suffering sigh, but apparently, she heard me and launched into a tirade. I tried my best to dissociate from her words, but I caught the highlights: I was a disappointment. I must have chosen Pack Ashwood to spite her because I was a terrible daughter. If I didn’t watch my figure, my alphas would lose interest and start sleeping around. They only wanted me to join their pack to elevate their status as bonded alphas.

“Josephine, are you even paying attention to me?” she screeched.

“Yes. But I have to go. My alphas are waiting for me to eat breakfast.”

“I hope they’re following the diet the DC doctor created for you. God knows you need all the help you can get.”

I quickly said goodbye and ended the call, cutting off whatever else she was going to say.

A dark mood settled over me. My alphas would probably be done with their workouts soon. I should go downstairs to join them for breakfast, but my mom’s poisonous words seeped into my bloodstream. What if she was right? What if Cam, Theo, and Ben got up early because they didn’t want to be with me? Or maybe they had wanted me to get up and work out with them. They could easily find more attractive women to sleep with.

My thoughts spiraled and I was helpless to stop them as my body shook with the fear of rejection. Maybe I could do something to prove that they should keep me.

I threw the covers off. First step was to get my ass out of bed.

A good omega is the first to rise. 

A good omega cares for the home without complaint. 

My mother’s barbs had hit their target as I felt the DA’s lessons bubble to the surface. Old wounds I thought had healed now bled out painfully. I threw my hair up in a bun and pulled on sweatpants and a sweatshirt on autopilot.

I would prove to them I was useful. 

I heard the showers going when I crept into the hallway. Good. I could get started with cleaning the gym. Luc had always approved of my work, so I didn’t think I could mess it up too badly.

I headed downstairs until I found the door to the gym. I flipped the light switch, revealing a massive room that rivaled Luc’s gym. State-of-the-art equipment lined the walls. There was a large fridge, a wall of mirrors, padded floors, and multiple TVs. It was absurdly over the top for a home gym.

I found a cabinet with cleaning supplies and started wiping down all the equipment, wishing I had some music playing.

A good omega is a quiet omega. 

I wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but I was hot and sweaty when I returned the cleaning equipment. I stretched, looking over the gym. I’d disinfected everything, mopped the floors, and started a load of towels. The smell of bleach was so intense my nose stung and I felt a bit lightheaded. I breathed through my mouth as I did a final once-over of the space.

Alright, what next? I bit my lip, wondering if the guys had already eaten breakfast. I should have prepared food for them. I hadn’t cooked for them at all since being here. Shit. I was frustrated with how quickly I’d let my guard down. I needed to remember my DA lessons on pleasing alphas.

A good omega serves her alphas with a smile.

A good omega defers to her alphas’ authority.

I could at least prepare lunch, vacuum the main floor, and do a few loads of laundry. I nodded to myself, feeling better about my plan.

I padded back up the stairs, my limbs shaking slightly from exertion, rattling off a mental list of what I needed to do next. I rounded the corner towards the kitchen and almost ran into Ben. 

“Josie!” he exclaimed, shooting his arms out to steady me. He glanced towards the stairs and back at me, brow furrowed. “Theo just went to wake you up. Where have you been?”

I opened my mouth and closed it again, suddenly embarrassed.

“What happened to your hands?” Ben asked, gripping mine gently. “They’re all red.”

“Oh. I was just cleaning,” I said, hearing how mechanical my voice sounded. I tried to tug my hands out of Ben’s grasp and forced a smile.

A good omega doesn’t complain. 

He didn’t let go.

“What were you cleaning, precious? We need to get some cream on your skin. This looks painful.”

He led me over to the sink and turned the water on, testing the temperature before gently rinsing my hands under cool water. My omega melted at our alpha taking care of me, but I clenched my jaw. This was exactly the problem. I needed to be the one taking care of them. Why was I so defective?

“They’re fine,” I said, pulling my hands out of the water with more force than necessary and drying them off. “I was going to make lunch. Any requests?”

“You haven’t eaten breakfast yet.” Ben frowned. “And you didn’t answer me—what were you cleaning?”

I shifted side to side and avoided his gaze before I realized I was disobeying… again.

“The gym,” I finally said.

Ben’s expression was bewildered, but before he could say anything, Theo shouted from upstairs.

“Josie isn’t in bed!”

“She’s down here,” Ben shouted back, his brow still furrowed as he stared at me.

Theo and Cam thundered down the stairs. Cam was gathering his hair up in a bun as he walked into the room, and, for a moment, I was distracted by my desire to run my hands through it.

“Where were you?” Theo asked, wrapping his arms around me. “And why do you smell like bleach?”

I stiffened. Theo smelled fresh and clean like he had just gotten out of the shower. Part of me wanted to lean into his embrace, but a sick feeling gripped me as he nuzzled into my neck. I didn’t deserve his touch and attention. A nasty voice said he was only here with me because I was an omega and his inner alpha compelled him. There was nothing special about me, nothing to make my alphas want me.

“Sweetheart,” Cam said softly, brushing his hand under my chin to lift my gaze. “You’re shaking.”

“Sorry,” I whispered, my throat tight as I looked away.

I needed to get away from them before I burst into tears. My mind was all tangled. Everything seemed clear when I was alone in the gym. I didn’t know why I expected them to leave me alone to do chores, except that it was what I’d been taught my whole life.

Then Cam’s arms were around me. He lifted me onto the kitchen island and caged me in with his body.

“She needs something for her hands,” Ben said softly.

A growl rolled through Theo’s chest as he took in the raw skin before he stormed off.

I watched him leave with wide eyes.

Ben cupped my face. “He’s just worried, precious. We all are.”

“What were you doing?” Cam asked, frowning at my hands.

Ben responded when I didn’t answer. “She said she was cleaning the gym.”

“Why would you do that?” Theo asked, stomping back into the kitchen with a small tub of lotion.

“Just wanted to be helpful,” I said, my lower lip trembling.

“We have people who come clean,” Theo said, rubbing the cream tenderly onto my hands. They stung a bit but weren’t too bad.

“You do?”

“We asked them not to come while you’re settling in,” Theo responded. “Research shows omegas settle in better to a new place when there aren’t strangers coming in and out.”

“Oh.”

“Is the house not clean enough for you, sweetheart? Because we can clean,” Cam said, his hands firmly planted on my thighs.

I shook my head.

Fuck, now they thought I was criticizing their house. I didn’t understand how this entire day had backfired so spectacularly. My chest squeezed with anxiety. I wanted to run back to my nest and cover myself with blankets.

Ben wrapped an arm around me. “I don’t know what’s happened to make you so upset. If you’re not ready to tell us, that’s okay.” He glared at Cam, who looked very much like he disagreed, before continuing. “But we’re not going to leave you to be upset alone. You have us now. That means you don’t have to suffer alone.”

His sweet words broke through the barriers I’d erected, and I released a sob.

All three of them pressed against me immediately, arms wrapping around me in a tangled pile.

“Sweet omega, what happened?” Cam asked as he held my face to his chest.

My sobs intensified, and he kissed my cheeks before grabbing some tissues and gently wiping my face.

“You shouldn’t be with me,” I whimpered.

“Why not?” Theo asked, eyes darkening.

“Because I’m not good enough for you. You should make me leave.”

“What? That’s not true. What are you talking about, gorgeous?” Ben asked, gripping my neck.

“You deserve someone better.” I tried to move away, needing to create some distance between us. None of them gave me an inch.

“Josie, what happened? I thought you were happy here with us,” Theo said.

“I am happy here,” I whimpered. Happier than I’ve ever been. 

“Good, because we’re not letting you go. Now, what happened?” Theo asked again.

“My mom called,” I whispered.

“Ahh, charming woman, a real ray of sunshine,” Ben said dryly.

I let out a startled laugh.

“I’m guessing she said some nasty things that got you doubting yourself,” Theo said.

“Yeah.”

“I can say confidently that whatever she said, it’s a load of shit,” Cam growled.

“I just want to be useful around the house. A good omega keeps a perfect home for her alphas.”

All three of my guys raised their brows in a look of pure incredulity that would have been funny in a different circumstance.

“What Stepford Omega bullshit is that?” Theo sputtered.

“That’s not what we want. Please don’t let her poison your thoughts,” Ben said gently.

“But what if she’s right? What if you change your mind about me? I need to make sure I’m useful.”

Cam gripped my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze. My breath caught when I saw his blazing eyes.

“We will never change our minds about you. Don’t fucking say things like that,” he growled. His scent was bitter with agitation, and his body was practically vibrating. Ben and Theo looked equally unhappy.

They were upset.

Not because I hadn’t been cooking and cleaning but because I doubted my place with them.

Shit.

My mother was profoundly unhappy in her relationships, so why had I let her get in my head? And when had my guys ever indicated they wanted a traditional house omega?

“Oh,” I breathed out, slumping against Cam’s chest. The solidness of his body soothed me.

He wrapped his arms around me, cradling my body to his.

“Are you back with us?” Theo asked, leaning in to press soft kisses down the side of my face.

“Yeah. Sorry, brain got hijacked there for a bit.”

“We want you just how you are,” Ben murmured, pulling me in for a sweet kiss. I must have looked hideous, my eyes red and puffy from crying, but Ben didn’t seem to care. He placed gentle kisses on my eyelids.

“Did you actually want to make lunch? Because I thought we could order in,” he said.

“Umm…” I was a good baker, but cooking was not my strong suit.

Ben grinned. “Take-out it is.”

“What about Thai?” Theo suggested, pulling out his phone but keeping one hand in mine. Then he froze. “Wait, do you actually like Thai or was that another joke on the questionnaire?”

I giggled. “No, that one was true. I think you’ve discovered all the lies by now.”

I glanced up at Cam. He was standing between my legs, his hands resting on the island on either side of me.

I bit my lip, worried about how quiet he was being.

“You okay?” I whispered.

He huffed and rested his forehead against my shoulder.

“Fuck, baby girl, still recovering from hearing you say we should make you leave when you’re the best thing that’s happened to us.”

“You’re too sweet to me,” I said, pulling his hair down from its bun and running my fingers through it.

“No such thing,” Cam grumbled, leaning into my touch. “You deserve all the sweetness.”

A smile tugged at my lips at hearing my gruff alpha say something so sappy.

“Will you cuddle with me?” I asked, repeating his request from yesterday.

“Fuck yes.”

Cam lifted me off the island and carried me into the living room. Ben and Theo followed, piling around us as we turned on a movie.

I tried to get my body to relax, but an uncomfortable restlessness still gripped my chest. Guilt wormed its way into my stomach—guilt for messing everything up this morning, for making my alphas worry… and for not being good enough for them. They might disagree, but deep down, I knew it was true.

The Thai food arrived and Ben dished me up a big plate. I was hungry, but my mother’s warning about gaining weight haunted me. I ended up picking at my food, something the guys were clearly unhappy about. They kept looking down towards my plate.

“Can you eat any more, love?” Theo asked, tenderly cupping my face.

I shook my head. “I’m not really hungry.”

His eyes were tight, but he didn’t say anything as he took my plate.