Forbidden: Part One – Chapter 40
“We’ve got cereal and toast,” Theo muttered. “Why don’t we have more prepared foods in this house?”
I hid my smile behind my hand as he puttered around the kitchen, grumbling about the lack of gourmet breakfast options.
“Cereal is fine,” I said soothingly.
Theo turned to me with a scowl. “You deserve better than that. I’ll order something.”
I couldn’t hide my giggle this time. Theo stalked over to my perch on the island stool, wrapping his arms around me, his chest against my back.
“Are you laughing at me?” he asked with a hint of a growl.
God, I wasn’t sure there was anything hotter than a growly British accent.
“Not at all,” I said, biting my lip to keep from laughing. “Thanks for taking such good care of me.” I shifted in the chair so I could kiss him.
Theo returned the kiss, looking pleased when we finally parted. He pulled out his phone and started a takeout order.
“Cam and Ben should be back soon, so we’ll get food for them, too,” he said.
I did a happy wiggle in my chair, excited to have all my alphas around me again. I loved my alone time with Theo, but I missed Cam and Ben. There was an emptiness in my chest anytime I was separated from them.
“Are you excited to have them back?” Theo asked, kissing my forehead as he continued to add food to the order.
“Yes,” I said happily before pausing. “But I was really happy to have alone time with you, too,” I added quickly.
“It’s okay to miss them, angel,” he said thoughtfully, gripping my chin. “But selfishly, I’m bloody thrilled we had this time together.” He winked, a smirk tugging at his lips as he slowly ran his eyes down my body.
I wasn’t wearing a bra and felt my nipples hardening against my tank top. I shifted in my seat again, a sore twinge in my vagina reminding me I’d had sex twice last night and fallen asleep with his knot still inside me. Even with my soreness, I wanted to feel him inside me again. I let out a contented sigh, thinking about how patient and gentle he had been, how good he’d made me feel. I had been so scared to have sex, but now I wanted more. I blushed, wondering what sex with Cam and Ben would be like when icy anxiety seized me.
“Wait, do Ben and Cam know we had sex?” I asked, my chest feeling uncomfortably tight.
Theo looked up from his phone. “I haven’t told them,” he hedged, gently wrapping his hand in my hair. “But they probably felt it through the bond. Why, love? Do you not want them to know?”
“Are they going to be mad?” I asked, my voice almost a whisper. What was the etiquette around sex in a pack? I needed to ask Poppy.
Theo’s brow furrowed. “Of course not, angel. We all want you to be happy, and that includes making sure you get alone time with each of us. And even if they are jealous, that’s not for you to deal with.”
I scrunched my nose, confused. “Why wouldn’t it be my issue to deal with?”
“Because you’re not responsible for how we feel.”
I heard Theo’s words, but I couldn’t make sense of them. “Growing up, it was always my fault if someone was angry at me,” I blurted out.
Theo’s grip on my hair tightened as he tilted my head so I met his gaze.
“It was never your fault. They just wanted to break you down,” he said fiercely.
A gush of slick soaked my underwear at his intensity, and I suppressed a whimper.
“Fuck,” he groaned, pulling me into his arms. “You smell so good.”
I took a deep breath and snuggled into his embrace. I still felt anxious about Ben and Cam finding out, but if Theo said it wouldn’t be a problem, I needed to trust him.
He had me review the food order to see if I wanted to make any changes before submitting it.
“You want to watch something while we wait?” he asked, keeping his arms around me. Theo had been the most hesitant about physical touch, but since last night, he hadn’t stopped touching me. I loved it.
“I actually had another idea,” I said, twisting my fingers together.
“What is it?” He held me a little tighter as if sensing my nervousness.
“I was wondering if maybe you could help me practice resisting your bark.”
I’d gotten the idea last night but knew it was a risky request after Theo told me about his history of using his alpha bark. I had a feeling he needed to redefine his relationship with his bark just as much as I did. I wanted to erase the guilt he felt for what he’d been forced to do. I hoped if he used it on me, it could help him get more comfortable with that part of himself again.
Theo’s hand paused its soothing exploration of my back, and his breath hitched. “You would want me to do that?” he asked, his eyes filled with vulnerability. “You would trust me? After what I told you yesterday?”
I looked at Theo with confusion. “Why wouldn’t I trust you? What happened when you were younger wasn’t your fault. I know you won’t use your bark to actually force me into anything I don’t want to do.”
He said nothing for a long time, his eyes looking into the distance.
“We don’t have to. Forget I asked,” I said, my skin prickling with anxiety.
Theo’s gaze locked back on mine. “Sorry, I was lost in thought. Your trust means everything, my love. I’d like to give it a try.”
I smiled, pulling him in for a kiss. “Thank you,” I murmured.
“How do we do this?” he asked.
“We could do the same thing I tried in class? We stand across the room from each other and you tell me to walk towards you.”
“There’s only one problem with that, angel.”
“What?”
“I promised myself I wouldn’t go a single moment today without touching you. This puts a damper on my plan.”
“Well, maybe I’ll be terrible at resisting you.”
“You saying I’m irresistible?”
“Yes,” I breathed.
Theo groaned, running his eyes slowly up and down my body, making me feel like I was slowly catching on fire. I perfumed and he smirked, adjusting his pants where I could see a hard bulge.
“We better do this quickly before I change my mind,” he said in a low growl.
I giggled, escaping his embrace and walking over to the other side of the room. I might have tried to add a little extra swing in my hips.
When I turned, I saw Theo adjusting himself again before running his hand through his hair with the sweetest blush on his cheeks.
“Okay,” he said. “Let’s do this.” He went to issue the order and froze. His fists clenched and unclenched as he shifted side to side, and I caught a bitterness in his scent.
“Theo, it’s okay. Remember, you’re not forcing me,” I said softly. Maybe this was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have pushed him.
“I know, I’m okay,” he said quickly. “I can do this. You ready, love?”
I nodded, still uncomfortable with his distress.
“Come here,” Theo barked, his voice low and calm but infused with an undeniable command.
Before I knew it, I was in front of him, throwing myself into his arms. He reached out to catch me, pulling me flush to his body. I jolted with a stunned awareness of where I was, of what I had done. My lip jutted out in a disappointed pout.
“What the hell! I did way better in class.” My body heated with embarrassment. Theo was going to think I was such an idiot.
To my surprise, he chuckled at my outrage and pulled me closer.
“Don’t laugh at me,” I whined. Despite my anger at myself, I melted into him. “That was terrible. I didn’t even realize I had done it until I was already across the room.”
Theo pressed his face into my hair as I burrowed into this neck, my omega loving her alpha’s soothing comfort.
“Josie, love, did you want to come over here?”
“What do you mean?”
“Before I barked at you, did you want to come over here?”
“Yeah, I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
He squeezed me a little tighter. “Thank you, angel. You take such good care of me.” He brushed little kisses all over my face, kissing away my pouty lip. “You didn’t want to resist my bark, so you didn’t. Also, the more connected you are with an alpha, the harder it is to resist their bark. I’m sure you did much better with Luc.”
“So what do we do?” I asked.
“I need to tell you to do something you don’t want to do. That way, you’ll have the motivation to resist.”
“That makes sense,” I said, reaching up to push Theo’s hair out of his face.
“I could tell you to do something truly terrible, like walk away from me,” he said teasingly.
“This is building your ego way too much,” I grumbled.
“The way you looked at my cock last night already destroyed any chance of you keeping my ego in check,” Theo said, a heated look in his eyes as he squeezed my ass cheeks with both hands.
I was seconds away from suggesting we ditch this whole practice in exchange for a pre-breakfast quickie, but I wanted to prove myself.
“Fine, fine, okay. Bark at me again,” I said.
Theo smiled and pulled me in for a kiss. I was confused but couldn’t help molding my body to his and deepening the kiss. Then he barked.
“Stop kissing me.”
I stopped immediately, my face frozen inches from Theo’s. I let out a frustrated whine as my omega submitted to the bark. I took a breath as Theo held still in front of me, the warmth in his eyes giving me confidence. Slowly, painfully, I brought my face closer to his until our lips brushed together, breaking the command. I could feel his smile against my lips as he wrapped one hand in my hair, the other firmly cupping my ass.
“You did so good, omega,” he said before kissing me until I was breathless.
“Thank you, alpha,” I responded.
We continued practicing, my resistance coming faster and easier until Theo barked at me to go to the living room and I responded with an almost immediate “no,” standing my ground.
“Good job,” he exclaimed, lifting me in his arms and twirling me around. “You’re amazing, angel. I’ve never seen an omega be able to do that.”
I felt like I was glowing from his praise. Just then, we heard the front door open.
“We intercepted a delivery person in the driveway. You couldn’t manage on your own for one meal?” Ben called out as he walked into the kitchen and set down two brown takeout bags.
“I said I would be fine with cereal,” I said, leaping into his arms.
“Psh, no. You deserve better than cereal,” Ben said, pulling me in for a kiss.
I giggled and squeezed closer to him. Ben paused and pressed his face into the crook of my neck.
“You smell delicious, precious,” he said, a sly hint in his tone.
I stiffened, knowing he scented Theo on me. I waited to see if he was angry.
“Did Theo make it good for you, beautiful?” Ben murmured softly, his lips brushing the shell of my ear.
I nodded, sucking in gulps of his sweet scent.
“He better have,” Cam said gruffly. I jumped, not having heard him come in.
I moved out of Ben’s arms and threw myself at Cam. He picked me up and I automatically wrapped my arms and legs around him.
“Missed you,” Cam murmured.
“Missed you, too,” I responded, pressing my face into his neck to see if there was any anger in his scent. When there wasn’t, I allowed my body to soften fully, finally letting myself believe they weren’t mad at me.
Cam set me down on the counter with a gentle kiss as Ben and Theo started pulling food out of the bags.
“How did it go?” I asked, taking in Cam’s exhausted expression.
“Fine,” he responded, sharing a look with Ben I couldn’t quite interpret.
Before I could ask more, Theo put a plate of food down in front of me and Cam gathered me up in his lap.
“You going to cuddle with me today, sweetheart?” he asked.
I hid my smile at the big alpha asking for cuddles.
“Of course,” I said, placing a soft kiss on his lips.