Experimentation

Dear Diary

How am I supposed to do this? Edwin now knows what I’ve become, and I’m scared to see what he is going to do. It’s only been two weeks since that day, and I haven’t seen him. I’m terrified that he is going to try and find a way to either take this affliction away from me or… use it to torture me further.

I don’t know how to handle this. What am I supposed to do? Give up? I’m barely holding onto my sanity at times, falling in and out of these dreams where all I can feel is the water in my lungs. The electricity running through my veins, pushing my heart to beat louder in my ears.

Bump…

Bump…

Bump…

Trying to block out the dripping sound of the tap that resided next to the chair. Katrina tells me to because of the previous patients senses being altered by Dr. Edwin himself, they begin to lose themselves and the sound triggers the descent into insanity. I’ve lost myself more times than I can count while residing here in these last few months, falling into the madness of pain and the solitude of the padded walls. The loss of one’s humanity can be associated with the lack of sanity, and if I lose my humanity, what do I have left?

I have to figure everything out before I’m among those whose minds are lost.

Wish me luck, Irisa

Slamming the book on the next, I run my fingers through my hair pulling it as I go along. Root yourself, find your center. My gaze turns to my hands, watching them shake with fear and anxiousness. A spark erupts through my chest, I turn my palms upwards trying to stabilize my hands. My veins begin to pulse with blue light, coming in rounds, lighting up my arms. Watching the lights move up my arms tracing my neck, going down my chest, centering around my heart. My body begins shines with blue, I feel the electricity in every part of my body. From the curve of my spine to the inside of my eyes.

I bang my hands against the table, the energy flies off of my skin sending the table crashing into the wall, shattering upon contact. The shaking once residing in my hands extends to my arms, twitching and moving beyond my control. I can’t hold on much longer!

The door burst open, a man dressed in white holding a long brown circular object. Masked people begin to filter in, all in white, no other color present on them. I feel a sharp sting in the side of my thigh, pulsing a weak nausea wave through my body. My eyes begin feeling pressured and heavy, my body sways forwards falling onto the floor. The light flows into the ground, watching as the world fades away into the abyss.

“Wakey Wakey Ria, time we talk.” The breath of the man standing above me hits my ears. I’ve heard this voice before, how can I not recognize it? A hand wraps around my upper arm, pulling me off of the bed. My eyes still feel heavy, must of been from the energy draining. “Sweet Ria, I know you’re awake. Time to open your eyes, or do I have to make you?” Edwin, my stomach twist tightly with my breathing becoming erratic. Don’t let him see your fear, it will only make him happy. Forcing my eyes to met his, his smirk flatters slightly, he needs a reason to hurt me now.

Dr. Edwin releases my arm, my whole body slumps back against the cold concrete wall. I’m in his favorite torture chamber or ‘punishment’ room, as I’ve learned from Trina, is what he calls this place. The rooms been cleared out of his latest Saw based contraption, He’s the Jigsaw of our world. “What did I do now?” My voice comes out creaky and stiff, feeling dry and scratch. Dr. Edwin carries a purple stained cup towards me, “Drink this, my team gave you too high of a dosage. There will be some side effects, but I’ll make sure you’ll be okay.” Raising my arm slowly seemed too hard for my body to handle, lifting it slightly off of the bed causes trembling in my hand. Dr. Edwin’s face twist in anger, grabbing my chin roughly squeezing tightly. He roughly prays my mouth open, grabbing the cup while pouring the liquid down my throat. “Drink It!” Edwin’s voice booms throughout the room, send a shiver down my spine. A jolt of fear ignites inside of my chests, I need him to let go of me.

Swallowing the last drop of water is like breathing in smoke, my lungs feeling burnt from the inside. “Look, was it that difficult? Next time, just do what I ask of you, okay?” I manage to move my head slightly upwards trying to nod, why am I having trouble moving? Curling my toes around the small chain resting besides the bed, pulling against them shifting my body forward. Listen to yourself Irisa, you’re trapped in a room with a crazy ‘doctor’ who knocked you out. The one who tortured you for hours on end just to teach you a fucking lesson, even when you did nothing fucking wrong! You need to leave this place, you’ve been here for 6 fucking months and all that has happened is you’ve received fucking powers. Powers that you’ve got no control over, who knows if you’ve ever get control over this affliction given to you by the man standing 5 feet away!

“Am I interrupting an important thoughts?” Edwin’s voice booms through my ear, causing a slight ringing to occur. “No,” I grind my teeth together, trying to hold back the anger erupting through me. “No need for attitude, do I need to teach you proper manners now?” Edwin sits down in a smooth faux leather chair facing towards me, pulling a clipboard out of a pocket on the side. He grabs a pen attached to the clip of the board, beginning to write along the lines of papers. What’s going on? “Ria, dear, today I need you to do something for me.” My right hand moves to wrap my fingers onto my left shoulder, pulling harshly forward using the pain to ground my emotions. Don’t freak out, you can kill everyone in this building. “What do you need?” Whispering barely above my breath, I know that Edwin can sense my fear. He isn’t a doctor to me anymore, just a sick man. Just Edwin. “I need to see this ability of your further, I want to make sure you gain control of this gift. No one needs to get hurt by it, you can use it for the better.”

His hand reaches into his pocket, pulling out a tiny metal cube. “Try shooting this, only this.” I force my hand towards it, but nothing shoot out. “I can’t do it,” After my words, Edwin lets out an aggressive moan before moving off of the chair. “Try again,” He places the cube on the floor backing away to rest besides me. I move my feet to stabilize them with the ground, pulling myself off of the bed. Just do this, hopefully he’ll leave you alone. Angling my hand towards the box, I try forcing the energy out of my body. Pushing my arm forward, nothing comes out.

“It’s not wo-” Edwin slams his hands against a metal table besides the bed, banging loudly. His face begins to change as he meets my eyes, his pupils swirling with anger. “TRY IT AGAIN!” His vocals pierces my ears, causing pain to course through my head. “Do it again or I’ll make sure someone pays for your disobedience. Like sweet Katrina, she’ll take a bullet for you. Even when you guys only get to talk twice a week, she wants you to survive. I bet she was the one who put these ideas of rebellion into your head. She needs to know her place.” Edwin rushes towards the door, almost reaching for the handle. Trina can’t get hurt because of me, I’m the one whose not working. “Stop,” My eyes begin to swirl with electricity as fear fills my chest. I just commanded him, he freezes in his tracks.

“Make me.” His voice holds determination before twisting the knob, ajaring the door slightly. The energy begins to swirl as I charge towards the door, reaching my hand towards it halfway across the room. A bolt of blue light hits the solid iron door, slamming it shut before Edwin can make a step out of the room. My feet stop running as he doesn’t attempt to leave the room again, but turns around to face me. “I guessed that fear or anger would be your trigger, maybe it’s both. Now, you didn’t move the box I wanted you to move, but the door is close enough. Shoot the box on the floor now, or I won’t hesitate to hurt Katrina.” The room’s colors turns to various shades of blue, seeing bolts flash around my eyes. Twisting my body backwards, a bolt arises from my fingertips slamming the box against the wall, shattering upon impact. The shards fall to the floor as Edwin’s maniacal laugh fills the room, send waves of anxiety through me. “Now, that wasn’t so hard. Every day, except for Sundays of course, you will meet me here and we will work on this. I don’t need to allow a monstrosity back into the world. Go to lunch now, Tina has made you a marble cake. Happy Birthday.”