SWNOVELS Chapter Chapter thirty-four
Waking up has been harsh, especially since my dreams have been better than reality. The saddest part is, eventually memory of these dreams will fade, and I'll be left to deal with the hard truth of reality.
Tossing my blankets aside, I set my feet on the icy floor, shivering ever so slightly. I stand up, taking a minute to stretch out my sleep-ridden muscles.
Quickly getting dressed, I leave out the front of the castle, deciding to walk to the small lake instead of flying today.
The deep greens of the forest glow silver in the fading moonlight. The morning hum of the birds and crickets sing in my ears as I walk through the trees. My nature walk helps to calm my inner turmoil, bringing me a much-needed sense of peace.
Reaching the small lake, I stop, taking in the sight before me. In the light of the dawning moon, the lake is a perfect mirror for the trees that surround it. A deep sense of serenity overcomes me as I stare in rapture at the expanse of blue that lies before me. Fiery rays of sunlight dance delicately across the water, replacing the silvery moonlight.
A warm hand settling on my shoulder pulls me from my thoughts. I turn around quickly, facing Flavius. When my eyes meet his brown ones I pull him close wrapping my arms around his waist setting my head on his shoulder.
"Hey," I whisper lowly.
Wrapping his arms around me, he replies, "Are you alright? You seem really tired," he asks.
"Everything has been so hectic lately. exhausted," I tell him.
Lifting my head up, I look into his molten brown eyes, "How have you been holding up? All of this must be really hard on you."
Staring at me fondly, Flavius kisses the top of my head, then pulls me to a nearby rock. Sitting down, he pulls me into his lap. Adjusting myself I lean back comfortably against his chest.
"Things have definitely changed for me, but I can't say all of it's bad," as he says this he pulls me closer to him.
"Are you afraid of all this change, because to be honest, I'm terrified, Flavius," I admit to him.
He lets out a deep bellowing laugh, "Are you kidding me. Of course, I'm scared anyone in their right mind would be. Things have been changing at an alarming rate for both of us."
Hearing that I'm not the only one who's been facing these fears brings me great comfort. I know now that I'm not alone. I have someone to share my hardships with. Grabbing Flavius's hand, I lace our fingers together.
Flavius suddenly sighs, his body going rigid.
"Ellie, does it bother you that I'm weak, that I'm human?" His voice comes out barely audible.
His sudden question startles me. How could he think that? I don't find him weak, not at all. His being human is what makes him who he is, and I wouldn't change him for the world.
"What's with the sudden question, Flavius," I pause turning to face him.
A guilty look flashed across his face. "I only ask this because yesterday, while I was with Soren, he said some things..." he trails off.
Soren! That idiot. What could he have spouted off about now?
"Don't believe everything he tells you. He has a tendency to say things that aren't always truthful. Now tell me, what exactly did he say to you?" I ask.
I swear to the gods, if he said something to make Flavius upset, I'm going to kill him.
"He told me that I am weak and..." he stops partway through, looking almost afraid to say the next part.
"You know you can tell me anything, right?" I urge him.
He sighs, nodding his head.
"He told me that you guys used to be together," he states, cringing with every word.
My body all but stops, and I stare up at Flavius with wide eyes. Then I begin to shake, letting out a roar of hysterical laughter.
Flavius stares at me his brows scrunched in confusion.
"I'm-I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh, this is just the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard," I breath out in between laughs.
"Why is this so ridiculous to you?" He leans back looking annoyed.
Reaching up I pull his face between my hands, "Flavius, Soren is like my big brother. Not to mention I couldn't have gotten with him even if I wanted to. Soren's over five hundred years old and has been mated longer than I've been alive. Him and his mate have a son. There is nothing you need to worry about. Soren was playing with you. I love you for who you are," I say softly.
Flavius relaxes at my words, and breaths a sigh of relief.
"Alright, I believe you," he says breathily.
Scratching my head, I look away from him, "There is one thing you should know. I was with someone before you," I admit.
I can't help but fear how he may take this news. The last thing I want is to disappoint him.
Flavius pulls me to his chest tightly, "Honestly I don't care. It was in the past. You're with me now, so there's no reason for me to be mad," he murmurs.
How did I get so lucky to be mated to a man like this? I could ask for nobody better.
"I'm glad that you don't seem to mind, but why is it that you cared when you thought it was Soren I was with?" I ask.
"Because if it was Soren, then I would constantly be thinking about it seeing him, it's a lot easier to deal with when I don't have to be around the other person," he explains.
Staring down at me, Flavius cups my face in his hands.
"Eleonora, I don't want you to feel ashamed about this. How can I hold this against you if I myself have been with others?" He says.
I'm shocked by his words, not the fact that he's been with others but he actually used my full name. The use of my name shows me the seriousness of his words.
Twisting in his arms, I turn so I'm straddling him. Delicately, I wrap my arms around him, placing my face in the crook of his neck. I breathe in his calm, earthy scent.
"Thank you," I mumble.
He tightens his grip on me, "There is no reason to thank me. I accept you, all of you. Now, tell me, I'm curious; this other person you were with, what's he like."
Flavius words shock me, so much so that I nearly jump out of his embrace.
"Why on earth would you want to know about him?" I seethe with a deep scornful scowl.
"I didn't mean to upset you, I was simply curious. If you don't wish to talk about it, I won't make you," he says.
I want to tell Flavius, but I do not wish to relive that moment in my life. It's just so painful. But then again, I do owe Flavius answers. If I wish to maintain a good relationship, then we must be able to clearly communicate with each other.
I take a deep, shaky breath, preparing myself to tell Flavius of my most painful love.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to overreact, it's just that the only thing that's associated with him is pain. If you wish, though, I will tell you," I croak.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter don’t forget to like and comment.- Ray