Bittersweet Memories (Off-Limits)

I smile to myself as I step out of the shower. Going on a proper date with Alanna was everything I was hoping it’d be. There’s something so intoxicating about holding her hand in public. I’ve never felt anything like it before.

Alanna, a good view and an excellent dinner. It was perfect. Simple, but oh so perfect. It’s strange how it’s all of these simple things that bring me the most happiness. Putting a smile on her face, treating her to things we could never afford before. It makes it all worth it.

Alanna glances at me through her dresser mirror, pausing midway through combing her hair. I’ll never tire of the way she looks at me. She’s so honest with her desire, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt more wanted. It isn’t just physical between us. This connection… When she disappeared, I tried to convince myself that it wasn’t quite what I remember it to be, that I placed her on a pedestal the way we do with lost loved ones, and I suppose I was right. It isn’t quite like in my memories. It’s better.

I lean back against the wall as her eyes roam over my body, pausing on the towel wrapped around my hip. “Baby,” I murmur, tipping my head to the fist I’m holding up. I uncurl my fingers slowly, showing her the crane in the palm of my hands.

Alanna bursts out laughing, and I grin back at her in return. Yeah, this kind of happiness is something else. It’s out of this world, and it was worth waiting for.

“You really have hidden them all over the house, haven’t you? Why do these cranes keep popping up out of nowhere?”

I shrug. I absolutely did hide them all over the house without a single ounce of shame. I’ve got several hidden in every room, ready for me to pull out whenever she’s upset. I know she gave them to me to serve as a bridge between us in the event of an argument, but I’ve found that they’re a great way to make Alanna forget all about the worries being with me have caused her.

Even today, as she smiled at me over dinner, the two of us lost in conversation, the light in her eyes would dim occasionally, her thoughts drifting, undoubtedly to the harsh words she’s been surrounded with, the ridicule she won’t tell me about. One of these paper cranes is exactly what I need to make her forget everything, even if it’s only for a few hours.

“I feel kind of upset,” I lie. “I’m still thinking about how you said you didn’t want fries as a side dish with your steak, and then you ate my fries. You. Ate. My. Fries.”

She bursts out laughing, the sound sending a ripple through my heart. Fuck. She’s so ridiculously beautiful, and seeing her sitting in our bedroom in nothing but one of my t-shirts… yeah, this is my every dream come true.

“I’m opening this,” I tell her. “This paper crane better avenge me. I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep tonight if I don’t get a reward in return for those fries.”

She watches as I unfold the origami paper, my heart skipping a beat when I read the word written on it in her handwriting. “Blowjob, huh? You really are my filthy little slut, aren’t you?”

She rises from her seat and walks toward me, her steps slow and measured, an intoxicating smile on her face. “Yes,” she tells me. “I am.”

Alanna pauses in front of me and grins wickedly before dropping to her knees in front of me. She looks up at me through her lashes and places her hands on my towel, yanking it loose with a hint of impatience. My cock is ready for her. It always is. I don’t think I could ever not want her.

“I’m sorry,” she says, her hand wrapping around the base. “I’m sorry, babe. So sorry for eating your fries.”

I bite back a smile as she pumps up and down, her eyes on mine as she teases me. I fucking love her. I love every single thing about her.

“I never should’ve touched them,” she says, grinning. “I really deserve to be punished.”

“Fucking slut,” I whisper as I tangle my hand through her hair. “I love you, little psycho.”

She places her lips at the tip of my cock and looks up at me. “I love you too, Si,” she says, right before wrapping her lips around me. I tighten my grip on her hair and pull her closer, making her take more of my cock, and she comes willingly, her tongue drawing circles around the parts she knows are most sensitive.

“Look at you taking my cock, baby. I didn’t feed you enough at dinner, did I?”

She sucks down hard, and I moan helplessly. She might be the one on her knees, but it’s me who’s at her mercy.

I ball my hand into a fist, pulling on her hair harder as I move her head back and forth, fucking her face until I’m hitting the back of her throat. Watching my cock slide into her lips is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen, and the fucking sight of her has me ready to come.

Every time she moans, the vibrations bring me to the edge. I meant to clear her thoughts, but it’s me who can’t think straight. “I’m so fucking in love with you,” I groan, and she increases the pace, sucking me harder. If she keeps going, I’m going to come all over those pretty lips of hers, but it’s her pussy I want.

I pull out of her mouth and yank her to her feet, my hands wrapping around her waist as I lift her up against the wall. Alanna’s legs wrap around my hips, and I push her underwear aside roughly, sliding into her in one smooth motion.

“Fuck, Silas,” she moans, her head falling back.

I smirk as I tighten my grip on her hips, keeping her pressed against the wall as I thrust into her roughly, taking her hard and fast. “You’re so fucking wet, baby. Sucking my cock turned you on, huh? You really are my personal little slut, my own little psycho.”

She looks into my eyes, her gaze unfocused as she wraps her arms around my neck, her lips finding mine. She kisses me the same way she just took my cock, her tongue driving me fucking insane. The hold she has over me is unreal.

“This pussy is so good,” I murmur against her lips. “I can’t fucking take it.”

She moans and rotates her hips, ensuring I brush against her clit with every thrust, her own orgasm building.

“You want to come for me, don’t you, baby?”

She nods, her movements turning more frenzied. “Please,” she begs.

I smirk as I take her harder, giving it to her at the pace she needs to push her over the edge. My eyes fall closed when her pussy contracts, a strong orgasm washing over her and taking me right along with her.

The way her pussy squeezes my cock has me unable to resist. “Oh, fuck, Ray. Fuck,” I moan, emptying deep inside her.

Alanna tenses and pushes against my chest with considerable strength, and I pull away from her, disoriented. “Let me go,” she snaps, her eyes filled with agony that wasn’t there seconds before. Her eyes fill with tears, and she sniffs, turning her face away from me.

Fuck. I just called her Ray.

“Babe,” I murmur. “It’s just a nickname. It’s a nickname for you.”

“Please,” she begs, tears streaming down her face. The look in her eyes fucking guts me. What have I done? How could I have hurt her this way? “Please, just let go of me.”

I lower her to the floor gently and draw a shaky breath. How do I explain in a way she’ll understand? “I swear, Alanna,” I plead. “It’s just a nickname for you. You’re my ray of sunshine, Alanna. That’s all it is.”

She looks into my eyes, disappointment mixed with her pain. “Don’t,” she whispers. “Please don’t, Silas.”

She walks away, slamming our bedroom door closed with a loud bang, leaving me staring at the door, unsure what to do or say. Fuck.