Behind The Alpha Book 8 ADAM

ADAM

“Wait by the bikes. I’ll be back.” I say as I walk to the Phoenix Security Unit to find Graham.

I jog up the stairs and stride down the hall to the Alpha council room.

I called the others yesterday to make sure they were here.

Kita and Graham exit the room and turn my way where I stop them.

Graham raises a brow. “Adam?”

I look him over. “It’s time.”

I walk with them down to the lobby.

Quinn, Oliver, Wes, Cass, Deacon, their mates and Nathaniel were waiting for us. Even Jesse showed when Nathaniel told them what we were doing.

I join the circle. They all look at me. “The Blue Falcons have been spotted in the Appalachian mountains. I can also confirm the Vamps are there as well. I have yet to find the Lefu of this world, but I have seen the one in the mirror world. It seems like they’re working together somehow.

“The bridge.” I look down at Kita as she looks up at me. “Rex and Lefu need the bridge to invade. They need Graham.”

I turn to him. “Then we don’t let him have you.”

Graham nods. “I like that plan.”

I turn back. “Now, we need to strategize, but I have someone with me who will upset some, if not all of you. I need you to trust me when I say, he’s an important part of the plan.”

“Michael.” Oliver growls.

My eyes connect with his. “I had to. I have no choice. I can’t kill Lefu without him.” I say low.

He looks to Ezra, lifts her hand and kisses it. “Shhh, baby. It’s fine. I got you.” He leans and whispers to her ear.

I watch her curiously. A strong Dire shouldn’t have so much fear inside her.

Oliver steps in front of his mate and gets up in my face. “If he steps one hair out of line, I won’t hesitate to give the release command and feed him to my mate. Am I crystal fucking clear? And this better work or you’ll be fed next.”

My eyes flick to Ezra as she tilts her head forward and her eyes glow red.

Deacon shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “Ollie, quit threatening to feed us to Ezra.”

He side eyes Deacon. “You want to be dessert?”

Deacon mouth goes small. “No.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Oliver grinds.

“I know it will work. He wants to kill Lefu as much as we do and now, he has nothing to lose which guarantees he'll do what he’s supposed to.” I say as I turn and wave them to the door.

“What’s Michael supposed to do?” Wes asks my back.

I look over my shoulder. “Die.”

The rest almost stop walking, but I don’t skip a beat as I hit the outside door.

He doesn’t know it yet, but when the time comes he will know. This part is why we died trying. We never found the Michael we needed in other times. That missing piece made our mission that much more difficult because Lefu only got stronger the more times we fought him. When the Reaper came into play, the game ended for my friends.

Not this time.

We walk out and Michael stands beside Astrid. The tension was thick as their eyes met. I know there’s a lot of bad between them all, but they’ll just have to get over it. It won’t be for long.

I turn to them. “Lefu will not go down easy. He’ll throw everything at us, but if I can get close, I can send him back to hell where he belongs.”

My head floats around the circle.

“How are you gonna do that?” Oliver grumbles.

“I have my ways which don’t concern you.” I say.

“What about the Shaman that’s with him?” I turn and Astrid is standing behind me.

“Kill him.” I growl.

“From what I understand, he’s the most powerful sorcerer on the planet. Even the Sorcerers can’t kill him. What makes you think you can?”

I turn to her and narrow my eyes. “Because, I’m me.”

She shakes her head. “Who are you exactly besides a beast of a man?”

I squint my eyes at her. “No woman has ever talked to me like that.”

She smirks. “I’m no ordinary woman.” She ticks her head and lifts a brow.

“No. You’re not.” I eye her and turn around.

“I think we can help with that.” Wes tosses his head to Thea. “With the exception of Iris, I think the nymphs have a pretty good magical arsenal.”

“I-I can make potions that may help.” Jenny squeaks from beside Deacon.

He kisses her temple. “My baby's so brave.” He preens.

Michael puts his hand up. “Death. You idiots really think can kill the Bringer of Death.” He laughs as he shakes his head. “You’re all fucking dead.” He throws up his hands and turns.

“Ezra…” Oliver gets his back up and Ezra’s claws come out.

“No!” I get in his space. “Stand down…right the fuck now.” My Alpha and my soldier rise up and I glare into his eyes. “You are on my team, you follow my fucking orders. Am I understood?”

“You have a lot of fucking…” Oliver starts.

“AM I UNDERSTOOD?!” I yell in his face as my eyes flash yellow and blue.

We have a brief staring contest.

Without breaking eye contact, his jaw ticks. “Ez…down.”

I watch her eyes fade to normal.

I reign in my emotions and block them. I turn from Oliver and face Michael who’s leaning on my bike seat. “We can do this, but we need to all work together. If you can’t do that, then leave, but I’m telling you this right now. Without every single person here, we will lose and I won’t save anyone who abandons this team.”

They look around at each other.

“Yeah…um…Go team.” Quinn smiles nervously as he pumps a fist, weakly, into the air.

“Sure.”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“I’m in.”

“So are we.”

“Michael?” I arch a brow and cross my arms.

“Why not? Watching you guys get yourselves killed should be fun. Lead the way, Mon Capitaine.” He lazily motions a hand to me then crosses his arms.

I close my eyes and shake my head. I know all hope is lost in him, but that only means he’ll be insufferable until his time comes.

Oliver looks to Ezra. “I’ve got the Dires on board.” He turns to me. “All the muscle you’ll ever need.”

Ezra steps forward. “As we gain more power in the fight, any dires they have will switch sides to us.”

I nod in affirmation.

“You got the arrows, right?” Cass turns to Ember.

She shrugs. “We should. I put the order in last week.”

Cass folds his arms and leans to his mate. “Did you submit them in triplicate this time?”

She turns and mirrors his image. “You never told me to.”

He throws his arms to his sides. “They always are!” He motions to her. “Policy 6b. All orders must be filed in triplicate and approved by Eros.”

She rubs her forehead. “Shit. I knew I forgot something.”

“Ember!”

“Sorry! You know me and manuals!”

He points to her nose. “You are no longer in charge of the paperwork.”

“Fine!” Ember growls with attitude.

“Fine!” Cass throws his arms up and storms off with Ember behind him.

“I really can’t believe they’re Love bugs.” Graham shakes his head.

I turn to Nathaniel. “Are you ready for this?”

He smiles as he approaches me. “I will always be ready to help the people of this planet.”

I look to his father. “Jesse?”

“Any animal you want, boss. Just tell me when.” He looks to his son and tips his hat. Nathaniel smiles back.

I nod. “I know the Alphas are developing a plan, we should join them.”

The group heads back in and I hang back. I don’t really want to involve any more people, but I guess I have no choice now that the Vamps have joined Lefu. Add to that, the current lycans and now Blue Falcon, this battle is going to have to involve everyone.

Which means I have no choice but to involve the Phoenix Alphas, much to my disdain.

I lean on my bike as I watch Astrid walk back inside. I see Graham turn and walk to me.

“Hey…um…before we go in…because I know it’s going to happen…I just want to say…Go easy on your dad, huh? This whole Lefu thing has him freaked right out and knowing you are hell-bent on throwing yourself in the fire, it’s killing him. I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but Hunter’s a friend. I hate to see him hurting. He loves you, Adam. Your dad is still your dad no matter what time your born in. He’s trying. Maybe, you should try too. A man's best friend is his father. He’s not trying to hurt you and I'm afraid if you don’t fix this, one day it'll be too late. That day may be sooner than you think.” He says.

If he only knew the ache I felt in my chest.

I raise my eyes to him. “It was too late the day I was born.” I push off my bike, stuff my hands in my pockets and walk up to him. “I don’t hate my father, Graham. Far from it.” I lower my head. “I just need him to think that I do.”

He scrunches his brow. “Why?”

I close my eyes. “It’ll make this whole thing easier if I’m spared attachments.”

I walk away and my head spins at the giant lie I just told him and myself. Nothing I do makes this any easier. The only thing that keeps me going is that one landing and it’ll stop. All of it. Only then can I stop for a minute and feel the holes in heart. If they only knew what I’ve had to do and what I will have to do. There’s no man on the planet who would go for it except me.

It's better just to let them believe how much I hate them. That’s a different heartbreak.

Hunter isn’t the only father I felt love for. I love them all except my first. He makes the hate possible. If I shield my love then they can’t hurt me like he did. Unfortunately, a lot of them were great men and made me wish I didn’t have to push them away. Hunter is a true father and like Astrid, I want that in the worst way, but I don’t deserve it. I deserve to be alone for however much time I have left.

If I win, I will see my friends again. If I lose, my memories will be wiped and I’ll have nothing to remind me of the loss I suffered trying to save them. I just need to get to that point and my body will be relieved of all of it.

I just need…

“You coming?” Astrid pokes her head out the council door as I stand, hesitantly, in the hall.

I grunt with a nod and walk to her gorgeous smile.

I push what Graham said to the back of my mind as I listen to the plans the Alphas have.

Axelridge is onboard as well as Falcon Ridge. This is good because the more people to get the battle out of my way, the better.

They conclude the session and we now have to wait for tomorrow. We are deploying to a small town called Vespra just inside the New York state line.

There I’ll make my stand. I’ll end everything and look that demon in the face as I rip him apart.

Before I leave, I’m stopped. I turn and my mother is behind me.

I haven’t seen her in so long. Seeing her pained face laced with love always kills me inside.

I blink my heating eyes and lean down to her. I wrap my arms around her and feel her life that she always has inside. I don’t know how she deals with it as a vampire, but she does and I couldn’t be more grateful.

Her arms around me make me feel safe.

“Hello, mother.” I mutter into her neck. As stupid as it sounds, I don’t want to let her go. If I do, it means my life is real and I have to face it.

“My love.” She breathes. “I’ve missed you so much.” Her quiet unemotional voice was a comfort to my ears.

“I missed you, too.” I respond.

She pushes me back. She leans to my eyes with a small smile. “Who’s the girl?” She whispers.

I glance at Astrid and turn back. “That’s a friend. Her name is Astrid. She’s…a lot like you.” I whisper back with a smile.

She looks Astrid over. “She looks like a good woman. I’m happy for you.”

I nod. “Thank you.”

She places her hands on the sides of my neck. “Come home for the night. It would be nice to have you home, even if it’s just for a while. You can rest, eat and prepare for the battle tomorrow. I’m sure your father would love to sit with you.”

My eyes float to Hunter talking with Jake. His eyes meet mine and I look away.

I raise my eyes to my mother. “Can Astrid stay with me?”

She smiles. “Of course. We have plenty of room.”

I kiss her forehead. “I love you.” I try to hide my shaky breath, but I’m sure she picked up on it.

“I love you, too.” She closes her eyes and we pause together for a moment before separating.

I reach for Astrid’s hand and she slides it into mine. Her warm hands always send shivers up my spine. “Astrid, this is my mother, Lainey Spencer.”

Astrid bows her head. “It’s an honor to meet you, Luna.”

My mother holds Astrid’s face just under her jaw. “The honor is mine. My son likes you, I know I will, too. He’s very choosy on who he associates with.”

“We're staying in Severn Station tonight. You can clean up and sleep there.” I inform.

“Lead the way.” Astrid grins. “Thank you.” She says to my mother.

“Thank you for putting a smile on my grumpy boys face.” She says.

We look to each other and I feel my emotions rise. I smile and rub my nape.

I clear my throat. “We should go.”

I lead Astrid out and think, what the hell am I doing?

Am I actually giving into my wants? This isn’t smart, but I can’t help it. I want Astrid. I want my parents. It’s like I don’t care what happens when my mission is done. I’m sick and tired of pretending I hate the world.

I don’t hate the world, I hate the demons infecting it and I’m taking it out on everyone else. I hate the decisions I made. I hate myself.

Even though my vampire is dead inside, I need to feel happy. If only for a few hours. Let me have this. I can hold onto it wherever I end up.

****

An hour later, Astrid and I walk into the pack house in Severn Station.

The smell and feeling of it brought me back. Even though it’s been only a few years, it still feels like a different lifetime.

My childhood was dark, but there were moments of happiness in this house.

My father letting me ride on his back through the common room. He’d trot through while I laughed and dump me into my mothers lap. He’d kiss her and I felt their love. It was pure and real. I want that .

I take Astrid’s pack.

“The spare rooms are set up. You can get settled in and I’ll start dinner. Adam are you eating solid tonight?” My mother walks past and stops in front of me.

I glance at Astrid. “Uh…yeah. I guess I could.”

“Good.” She glances as Hunter walks by her and heads to his office. He hasn’t said a single word to me since the last time we spoke. I wouldn’t either. I laid my hate out pretty thick. I wonder if I can still unbury him from it and tell him how I feel, just a little bit.

I stop at the bottom of the stairs and look toward his office. Maybe I’ll speak to him tomorrow.

I need work out exactly what I’m going to say as the last thing I ever say to him again.