Before I Rise

Marcus’s POV

It was a quiet night as Em and I walked down the little pathway that leads to Elder Morgan’s house. The only light source out here were a couple of solar lights that lit up the walkway. There was some sort of tension that filled the air around us causing her and I not to talk as we walked. I could tell she was nervous due to the way her thumb kept rubbing across my knuckles.

“It’s going to be fine. Don’t be so nervous, Love.” I spoke to her, trying to calm her down.

She let out a deep sigh and gave my hand a small squeeze.

“What if it doesn’t work?” She asked me.

“It will. Elder Morgan sounded confident when she spoke to me earlier today. If it doesn’t, then we’ll just plan on her trying it again in a few days when the full moon happens.”

She nodded her head in agreement and didn’t say another word. I knew she was nervous about this, but I really didn’t want her to beat herself up if it didn’t work. It was honestly a shot in the dark to begin with, I would be shocked if she was actually able to make contact with the Moon Goddess.

“Thank you for coming with me.” She said as we reached the house. She started to walk up the steps, but I stopped her before she could.

“Listen, no matter what happens tonight, I appreciate you for doing this. Even if it doesn’t work, the fact that you were willing to try means the absolute world to me.”

She stepped down from the first step and proceeded to wrap her arms around me causing me to do the same.

“I love you,” she whispered to me.

“I love you too.” I said, as I kissed the top of her head. We stood like that for just a few minutes before she finally took a step back.

“Okay, let’s do this.” She said, with a determined look on her face.

I gave her a small smile and took her hand into mine, leading her up the steps. Before one of us could knock, the door opened revealing Elder Morgan on the other side.

“Alpha. Luna.” She respectfully gave a small head nod and moved to the side to let us in. “Please come in. I’m so glad you could join us, Alpha.”

My nose was attacked with a hundred different smells as soon as I walked through the door. I had forgotten how obsessed Elder’s were with their plants. Though, I guess it was all for a good reason.

“Please follow me.” She said as she led us to the right side of the living room. There was a large circle in the middle of the floor lined with tan and white rocks. In the middle of the circle were two pillows next to each other.

“So, how exactly does this work?” Em asked her.

“First, I need you to drink this for me.” Elder Morgan handed Em a small tea cup that was sitting on a round table. “After you are finished with it, please take off your shoes and your coat, and lay down on one of the pillows in the circle. It should start kicking in a few seconds after you drink it all.”

Em brought the tea cup to her lips but hesitated. “Will it hurt?”

Elder Morgan shook her head, “No. All it does is put you to sleep and help awaken your third eye. If the Moon Goddess wants to talk, she will make herself present to you. It will feel almost like a dream. When you’re done, you’ll wake up.”

Em took a deep breath before gulping down the liquid. Her body shivered as soon as she drank the last of it.

“Wow, that actually doesn’t taste as horrible as I was expecting.”

Elder Morgan let out a small chuckle while taking the tea cup back from Em. “Now, if you would remove your coat and shoes, you can lay down in the circle.”

Em shook off her coat and set it on one of the chairs next to her. She started to take her shoes off, but was starting to have a hard time staying up right.

“Ugh, I feel really tired all of a sudden.” She reached out her hand towards me for some sort of stability. I immediately grabbed her hand and helped her remain up right so she could finally remove her shoes.

Once that was done I started to guide her to the circle, but was stopped by a hand on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry Alpha, but you can not step into the circle unless you have the special tea I made. It would disrupt the whole energy in the circle if you do.”

I looked at Elder Morgan to see if she was kidding. By the very serious expression on her face, I could tell she wasn’t.

“It’s okay, I can at least make a few steps by myself. I’ll be fine.” Em said, letting go of my hand and stepping over the stones into the circle. She about half collapsed on one of the pillows. As soon as her head hit the pillow, she was out like a light. Hopefully, that was a good sign.

I started to head for one of the chairs to sit in when suddenly, Elder Morgan appeared in front of me blocking me from the chair.

“Here you go Alpha.” She said, as she held out a similar tea cup that Em just drank from.

“What is this?” I asked her, confused on why she suddenly handed it to me.

“It’s the same thing I gave the Luna.”

My eyebrows bunched up as the confusion in me grew. “Why?”

She took a few seconds to think before answering me.

“When I first started gathering all the ingredients and tools I would need to do this, I started having dreams of this very scenario. Except, it was both you and the Luna in the circle together. I at first ignored the dreams thinking they would go away, but I have been having them every single night. I believe it may be a sign that the Moon Goddess would like to speak to the both of you together. I’m worried that if you don’t do this, that the Moon Goddess will refuse to speak to Luna Em. If I am wrong, then you’ll just end up taking a really relaxing nap.”

I stared at the purple liquid in the cup, debating whether or not I should drink it.

What do you think about this? I asked Xavier, curious if he had an opinion about it.

I say let’s just do it. If the Moon Goddess wants to speak to us, who are we to say no to her. Besides, if that isn’t the case, we just get to have a nice nap. Plus, we would get to nap next to our mate. Why would you say no to that?

I didn’t respond to him as I downed the liquid. Em was right, it was actually not that bad. There was a bit of sweetness to it, with a hint of lemon. My head immediately began to buzz and I felt tingles go down my body. I didn’t waste any time as I handed the cup back to her and quickly took off my shoes. I didn’t want to get unstable on my feet like Em did earlier. I wasn’t sure Elder Morgan would be able to hold me up right if I did.

I stepped into the circle and almost fell back as I did. The energy in the circle hit me like a ton of bricks. I had no idea how Em managed to even make it all the way in. I instantly laid down next to Em, finally feeling the effects of the drink. My whole body relaxed once my head made contact with the pillow. My vision began to get hazy and my eyelids heavy. I blinked a couple of times, before finally shutting them for good.

I felt as though I was swimming in darkness, when suddenly there was a flicker of a white light. It grew and grew until I felt almost like I was being pulled up and away from my body. The feeling went as quickly as it came.

I was suddenly standing surrounded by bright white light with mist all around me. There was a warmth and peacefulness to it. I looked around to see if I could see Em, but there was no one in sight.

“Hello?” I called out, hoping for a response from someone.

Suddenly, the mist began to clear in front of me revealing a figure. I moved closer to them to see who it was. The figure appeared to be a woman who had her back towards me. She had stick straight dark chocolate hair that ran down the back of her white dress. She was about medium in height and had a petite figure.

“Moon Goddess?” I asked, as I got closer to the figure.

As soon as the figure turned around, my heart stopped beating. She looked exactly how I remembered her, to her warm brown eyes, to the smallest freckle on her nose. I was overcome with emotion, unable to say anything. Instead, I dropped to my knees as a sob echoed out into the white abyss.

“Mom…” I whispered, too scared she would disappear if I was any louder.

She gave me a small smile as she closed the distance between us. She fell to her knees and captured me into her arms, holding me as though she had never stopped. I immediately pulled her as close as I could get her to me. My body began to violently shake as I continued to sob into her shoulder. She rubbed my back in a comforting way and slightly rocked us. I took a deep breath of her lilac smell. I didn’t realize until now, that I had forgotten what she smelled like.

“Oh Marcus.” She tearfully said.

My heart felt like it was being ripped out of my body when I heard her voice. If you would have asked me earlier today what my mom’s voice sounded like, I wouldn’t have been able to tell you. It had been so long that I couldn’t remember what she sounded like anymore.

“I’m… I’m so sorry mom.” I choked out through the tears.

My mom squeezed me harder. “For what?”

“For not trying to save you. I just hid under the bed like a coward and didn’t try to stop him. If I would’ve done something, you would still be alive!” I screamed out in rage.

My mother pulled away from me and held my face in her hands.

“Sweetheart, what could you have done? You were just five years old, a small boy. There was absolutely nothing that you could have done to prevent my death. It was my time to go Marcus, nobody could have stopped it. Not your dad, and certainly not you. You have got to stop blaming yourself!” She said, with a stern motherly expression.

I knew she was right in a way, however there was something stopping me from truly forgiving myself.

“I can’t mom. I’ve tried, but I just can’t forgive myself.” I mournfully whispered to her.

Mom wiped the tears away from my eyes and tucked some hair behind my ear.

“Listen Marcus, I’ve been watching you from here since the moment I left you. I have seen everything, including how your father treated you after I died. How he acted and what he said to you about it being your fault, is not true. The things he said to you, are completely false sweetheart. He knows deep in his heart that he doesn’t blame you, instead he blames himself for not protecting me. I’m sorry he chose to outwardly project his anger onto you. I am so ashamed of the way he acted. I have plans for him when he gets up here. Trust me Marcus, he is going to have to answer for all the shit he’s put you through.”

I took a deep breath in, trying to calm myself down. I felt almost a heavy weight being lifted off my shoulders. This whole time, I had often wondered if my mother blamed me as much as my father did. Knowing that she didn’t and that her love for me hadn’t changed, made a peace wash over me.

“I miss you so much mom. I wish so badly you could’ve met my mate. I think you would’ve loved her.”

“True, but I have been watching the both of you since she showed up on our pack land. She is amazing Marcus. I could not have picked a better mate for you.” A small smile lit up her whole entire face as she said that.

“I almost blew it though. Now that I have her, I can’t believe that I was so against the whole mate thing. She’s brought back light and warmth into my life.” I confessed to her.

“Yeah, I was getting worried there for a second. I was so worried that I started pestering the Moon Goddess to let me talk to you as soon as Em showed up. I’m glad she knocked your walls down son. You can’t let the fear of tomorrow hold you back from what your heart desires.”

I nodded my head in agreement with her. However, I became fixated on something she said.

“You asked the Moon Goddess to speak to me? I thought maybe she was letting us do this as a peace offering.”

“Nah, it was all my doing. She finally got tired of listening to me and saw this as a great opportunity for it, since Em was planning on trying to contact her anyway.” She explained to me.

“Well, I’m glad she did. It’s nice to know that you have been watching over me and that you know about Em. I also really needed to see you one last time. I felt like I never got any closure.”

My mom’s eyes swelled up with tears. “I do too. That’s why I pushed the Moon Goddess so much. There’s a few reasons why I wanted, no needed to speak to you. One of them is because I just wanted to tell you how incredibly proud I am of you, Marcus. You haven become an extraordinary Alpha and mate, and as a mother I could not ask for anything more than that. You have done great things sweetheart, never forget that.”

I closed my eyes, basking in this moment. I never had my dad say he was proud and I never thought I would hear my mother say it. It meant everything to me that I had one parent tell me that they were proud of me, that they could see all the hard work I’ve been doing. It made all the sacrifices that I had and will have to make worth it.

“Thank you.” I whispered to her.

“Of course Marcus, never forget that I am proud of you and that I love you deeply.”

“I love you too Mom.” I pulled her back into my arms, trying to remember everything about this moment.

After a few minutes, she cleared her throat and pulled back to face me. Her face went from happy, to extremely serious in the matter of seconds.

“What is it?” I asked her.

“Did you know that the minute they placed you on my chest, I knew you were destined for greatness?” She asked me. I shook my head no, waiting for her to continue.

“I’ve seen what the future holds for you Marcus and it is magnificent. However, you are about to face darkness and loss like you never had before. It will be painful and it will test you in many different ways. I want you to know that after the darkness fades away, you’ll be left with nothing but light and warmth. Your future may be filled with darkness, but it is also filled with light.”

“Is this about the rogue situation?” I asked her, as dread filled my entire body. What was this darkness she was talking about?

“I can not tell you any specific details that may alter your course. Right now son, you are on a path that can either lead you to a great destiny or great destruction. There is no in between.” She said with a solemn expression, making my concern grow.

“What do you mean mom? What great destiny? What is the darkness?” I desperately asked her.

Before she could answer me, a loud ringing surrounded us.

“Our time is up. I can’t tell you anymore Marcus. I’m sorry, I wish I could.”

The light around us began to dim and she started to disappear.

“No mom, wait! I’m not ready to say goodbye!” I tried desperately to cling onto her, but she was rapidly disappearing right before my eyes.

“It’s okay Marcus, you’ll be alright. I love you sweetheart.” Her voice whispered out as the last of her disappeared.

“I love you too mom!”

I suddenly sat up, sweat was covering me from head to toe. I was no longer surrounded by white light, instead I was back in Elder Morgan’s house. I looked at my surroundings before my eyes landed on Elder Morgan.

“Are you okay Alpha?” She asked me.

“Yeah, I am.” I partially lied to her. I honestly wasn’t sure how I felt. I just knew I couldn’t wait to tell Em about what happened. I looked towards the left of me and saw that she was still asleep.

“Is she okay?” I asked Elder Morgan, concerned that I had woken up and Em was still asleep.

Elder Morgan’s eyes lit up. “Oh yes, it’s a very good sign that she is still asleep. It could only mean one thing… She’s made contact with the Moon Goddess.”