Beating Heart: A Small Town, Single Dad Romance (Magnolia Falls Series Book 4)

I got Cutler down to sleep and grabbed a beer from the refrigerator. I’d noticed the asshole’s car was gone out front, but I hadn’t heard from Emerson.

Maybe she was confused after seeing him.

Hell, for all I knew, she might have left with him.

This was why I didn’t do attachments. I didn’t have time to get worked up like this. I took a long pull from my beer as I paced around the living room.

Fuck.

Why was I so pissed off about him coming here?

It was none of my fucking business.

A light knock on the back door startled me from my thoughts, and I moved quickly across the room and yanked it open.

She was wearing a pair of jean shorts and a white hoodie, hair pulled back in a knot at the nape of her neck. The sky was lit by only the light from the moon and the stars overhead.

“So what was that about?” she asked. Her hands were on her hips, and she raised a brow.

“I could ask you the same thing.”

“I didn’t know he was coming. But you overreacted a bit, don’t you think?”

I crossed my arms over my chest, mouth in a straight line as I stared at her. “Overreacted? I actually think I underreacted. I would have knocked his ass out if Cutler hadn’t been standing on the porch next door, watching.”

“Do you want to tell me why you wanted to knock him out?” she asked, stepping a little closer.

“Because he fucking hurt you. He doesn’t deserve your time.”

“Okay. But you do know that I can take care of myself, right?”

“I’m more than aware, Emerson. You remind me all the time,” I hissed. “But sometimes I like to take care of you, so you’ll just have to deal with it.”

“Is that so?” Her lips turned up the slightest bit in the corners.

“That is so.”

“And the only reason you were upset about him being here was because you knew that he hurt me?”

I narrowed my gaze as Winnie came jogging over from the grass and walked past me like she owned the place. But I hadn’t invited Emerson in yet. I was trying to put distance there, right?

Hell, I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing anymore.

“What other reason would there be?” I asked, my voice gruff as she moved closer, her chest bumping into mine as I looked down at her.

“It seemed like maybe you were jealous.”

I chuckled and scrubbed a hand over the back of my neck. “I don’t get jealous.”

“Not even a little bit?” Her hands moved to my chest, and she tipped her head back to look up at me.

“Does it even fucking matter?” I hissed, suddenly angry again as I turned and stepped into my house, and she followed me inside.

“Yes, Nash. It fucking matters.”

I was surprised to hear the anger in her voice. She was the one throwing all the mixed signals. She was the one leaving in a few months. She was the one who had just been chatting with her ex-fiancé. Why the fuck was she irritated?

“Listen, I overreacted. I saw him there, and I didn’t like it.”

“Why?” she pressed, following me to the kitchen, where I grabbed my beer and leaned against the counter. “Why didn’t you like it?”

“I don’t know.”

She reached for the beer and took it from my hand, setting it on the counter beside me. “Yes, you do.”

“What the fuck do you want from me, Emerson? I’ve been playing by your rules this whole fucking time.”

Her eyes widened. “My rules? You were the one who said you don’t do relationships. How are these my rules?”

“Fine. They were our rules. And it’s just gotten—complicated.”

“And you don’t like complicated, right?” she asked, moving right in front of me again and fisting her fingers in my shirt.

“I don’t know what I like anymore.” I looked away because I couldn’t look into those jade-green eyes and lie to her. I knew exactly what I wanted.

I want her. All of her.

“Nash,” she said my name on a whisper. “Look at me.”

I swallowed hard and turned to face her. Her eyes were wet with emotion, and her bottom lip trembled.

“Are you going back to him?” I finally asked, because I couldn’t help myself.

She looked surprised by the question. “Is that what you think? You think I would go back to him?”

“I don’t know. It’s crossed my mind over the last hour while you’ve been over there with him.”

“So you were jealous?” Her lips turned up in the corners as a tear ran down her cheek.

“Tell me what happened.”

“He apologized. Maybe he needed more closure, I don’t know. I’ve made peace with what happened a while ago. So, that was more for him than for me.” She reached for my hands and intertwined her fingers with mine. “But what surprised me was what I realized over the last hour while he was there.”

“What did you realize?”

“I realized that all I was thinking about was you. Wondering why you were so upset that he was there. Wondering why you’d gone to dinner without me tonight when we’ve been together every night for weeks. Wondering if you’d grown tired of spending time with me.”

“That wasn’t it at all,” I said, my voice gruff as my hands moved to each side of her face.

“Why, then?” Her voice shook, and I knew what she was asking.

“Because you had the interview today, and it went well. Because you’re fucking leaving, and I don’t know what that means for us. I know I’m just a stop along the way for you.”

“A stop along the way? That’s what you think?”

“I’m a realist, Emerson. I have a kid to think about. He’s getting attached. I’ve got to be smart.”

She pinned her lips between her teeth and shook her head the slightest bit. “You’re worried about Cutler? He’s the only one who’s getting attached?”

I groaned. “We’re both getting fucking attached.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” she pressed.

“Yeah. It’s a bad thing. You just got out of a long relationship, and I’m the fucking rebound guy. I know that. I signed up for that. But things are getting too heavy. I needed to pull back.”

“You aren’t the rebound guy, Nash. You were never the rebound guy.” The tears were falling down her cheeks now.

“What am I, then?”

“You’re the man who put me back together and made me realize how good things could be. You’re the man I think about every second of the day. It was never like this for me before. That’s why I can’t even hate Collin anymore. You ruined that for me,” she said, and her voice shook with each word.

“Ruined that for you, how?”

“I can’t hate someone for doing something that led me to finding what I needed all along. I don’t know how it happened, but somewhere along the way of keeping it casual, I fell in love with you, Nash Heart. I didn’t know it could feel like this, and it scares the shit out of me. And I don’t know what it means for our future or if I should stay or go. I don’t even know what I want anymore professionally, because you’ve changed everything. But I know without a shadow of a doubt that I love you. I love the man that you are. The father that you are. And I love your little boy.” Her words were barely audible over her sobs. “And I’m terrified to love again and to trust anyone again. But I can’t hold in all these things I’m feeling anymore.”

My heart pounded so loud I could hear it in my ears as I watched her lay it all out there. I hadn’t expected it. Hell, I hadn’t realized how much I’d needed to hear it.

“Emerson,” I said, reaching for her hand before resting it against my heart. My large hand over her smaller one. “This right here. It beats every time I look at you. Every time you laugh. Every time you smile. Every time you walk toward me. It’s always beat for my son, but I swear to God, my fucking heart beats for you now, too. You brought a part of me back to life. A part that I didn’t even realize was gone. I love you, and it scares the shit out of me.”

“Beating heart,” she whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks.

“I don’t want to hold you back, Emerson. I will not be that guy who tells you what to do. If you want to work at that hospital in Boston, I’m going to support you. I want you to chase your dreams and have everything you want. But my life is here. Cutler’s life is here. So I don’t know how this works.”

She was looking up at me through teary eyes, lips turned up in the corners, as she tangled her fingers in my hair. “All I know is that I’ve never felt like this before. I almost married a man, and it wasn’t like this, Nash. And I know that this—what we have—is rare. It’s what’s most important in life.”

“Agreed. So, we’ll make it work. But we don’t have to have it all figured out right now. All that matters is that we know what this is now. We love each other.”

“We love each other,” she whispered, smiling up at me. I used my thumbs to swipe away the moisture on her cheeks. “I don’t think either of us saw this coming.”

“The only thing I see coming right now is you,” I said, as I scooped her up in my arms. Her head fell back in a fit of laughter, and I carried her down the hall toward my bedroom. I kissed her hard to keep her quiet before tossing her onto the bed. She reached behind her head and tugged the elastic from her hair and let her long waves fall all around her.

“I need to taste you, baby. Right fucking now,” I said.

Her teeth sank into her juicy bottom lip, and she lifted her hips enough for me to tug her denim shorts and lace panties down her legs.

“My girl has the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen, and I can’t get enough,” I said, my voice gruff as I tugged her so that her hips landed at the edge of the bed before I dropped to my knees.

I hooked her legs over my shoulders, and my tongue swiped along her slit, and I groaned at how wet and ready she was for me. I sucked on her clit as she squirmed beneath me.

Grinding all that sweetness against my lips.

I couldn’t get enough.

Couldn’t get enough of the way her fingers tangled in my hair. Of the little sounds she made when she was turned on. Of the way the words I love you sounded coming from her lips.

Words I never thought I’d need to say to a woman.

Words I never thought I’d need to hear from a woman.

“Nash.” She cried out my name as her thighs clamped around my head, and she went right over the edge.

I stayed right there as she ground up against me, riding out every last bit of pleasure.

She tugged my head up, my gaze finding hers.

“I need you inside me right now,” she whispered.

“Exactly what I was thinking,” I said, before climbing over her and kissing her hard. I was on my feet and hustling over to the nightstand for a condom.

I rolled the latex over my throbbing cock and moved back to the bed. I hovered above her and just stared at her for the longest time.

“I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I’d sure like to keep you, beautiful,” I said, my voice all tease, but I meant every single word.

I did want to keep her.

And if there was a way to do that without stifling her dreams, I was damn well going to do it.

Her eyes were wet with emotion, and she intertwined her fingers with mine as I shifted so the tip of my dick teased her entrance. I pinned her arms above her head, holding them there with one hand as I slid inside her, inch by inch.

Taking my time before I buried myself inside her.

I needed her in a way that wasn’t familiar.

All of her.

Mind and body.

Her eyes stayed on mine, and I leaned down and kissed her.

Tongues tangled. Breaths came hard and fast as we found our rhythm.

This fucking woman was made for me.

And she was mine in every way.