And her name is…

We join breakfast, and we’re among the few there. Nyx grins at me as I enter with Wulfric, as she has been since the night since my attempted kidnapping. Every morning Tiago sees me he gives me a look like he has a dozen questions to ask but can’t work up the nerve. I’m not going to pry, knowing I probably won’t want to answer them.

When Wulfric pushes in my chair he slides it nearer to his and proceeds to quickly wrap his arm around me as he takes his seat. I pinch his arm by the pit and he pulls it back. He rubs the skin and looks at me grumpily, with a scowl.

“Don’t go getting soft on me. You leave tomorrow morning,” I remind, elbowing him further away.

“All the more reason to keep you close. I need to keep these curves memorized so I can recognize you at the party. Knowing you, you’ll show up with a completely different face,” he smirks and takes a curly lock of my hair in his hand.

I flick my hair over my shoulder. “I could show up with completely different curves.”

He stares at me, and I think he’s being dramatic until I turn and see Nyx and Tiago also looking shocked. “What?”

“You can glammer yourself a different shape?” Nyx asks.

“More importantly, that someone couldtouch, and not detect?” Tiago asks.

Now I’m really confused. “It’s a glammer. They are used for disguise. What use would they be if you couldn’t?” I return. “Manipulating objects and glammers were the first things I learned. It’s basic magic.”

“Yea, hair colour, eye colour, skin tone,… ear shape!” Nyx gawks. “Does her hair feel curly? Like.. reliably?” She asks Wulfric.

“Every time I’ve tried,” he returns and his smile towards me looks… adoring.

“I don’t understand,” I admit. “Can you not?” They shake their heads. “Well that would have been much more useful at any point before now.”

I could have changed into one of the guards and claimed I escaped. I could hold a mimic glammer for an hour no problem if I knew them well enough. I always assume it was common practise and they would see through it. My mom always had. Keeping my ears a secret, I figured, was only due to my hair usually covering them and no one caring to question it considering where I was taken. I turn to the table and look down at it to hide my face with my hair and hide my expression. I’m so angry. It’s very possible they still would have caught me. I couldn’t change my voice to match and all my guards had been men. It also would have been impossible after the first year when the guard situation changed and I was too weak to pull off much more than my eyes and ears.

I sigh and rub my forehead. “My mom should have. Heck, maybe she did and I forgot. I was so young when she started teaching me…”

“How old?” Nyx asks, leaning toward me.

I’m about to answer when Noryth walks in looking ticked off. “Wulfric, plans have changed. You’ll be out of here with Tiago after breakfast.”

“What!?” The word erupts from my throat like a threat I can do anything about.

Noryth eyes me warningly. “Looks like Kheliq sent his men on a scavenger hunt. The last town the convoy was due to stop in has been demolished. Seems they couldn’t pay the high taxes in a couple of the shops and the whole district went up. With no where to stay they have to pick up the pace to get to the next town before it gets too late. The only thing worse in Kheliq’s kingdom than his guards are the thieves.” Noryth looks at me sympathetically now and I realize my face probably shows the pain of having my heart ripped out. “If they get robbed or some shit along the way it’ll be his ass for not being there. He can’t wait to join them in the morning and we only know where they are to meet up with themnow.”

While Noryth is talking Wulfric wraps his arm around me again and pulls me close to him. He kisses the top of my head and then passes me a plate. Who ever brought the food probably could reach the table between me and Wulfric and left both beside him. I look at him with questions and he just smiles.

“They aren’t going anywhere without me. Let’s eat breakfast together, and then I’ll go pack.” He sounds like he’s trying to reassureme.

Still I find every bite like a rock in my stomach. Wulfric eats well, which I’m happy for, but he sees me pushing food around my plate and tsks his tongue at me. He slides me his water, noticing my empty glass is the one thing I consumed, and I drink almost half of it. He pushes his chair away from mine and gets up, offering me his hand. I can’t cry and let him know how torn up I am that we’ve lost our last day together. The last day I had to convince him we shouldn’t be together.

He leads me up to his room and pulls out one of his duffles to start packing. I just sit on the bed, picking up the shirt I was wearing last night and trying not to cry. I bite my lip so hard it starts to bleed and Wulfric smells it immediately. He drops his bag and comes over to me, kneeling on the floor.

“What’s going on little mouse?”

“Fuck off with that already,” I snipe.

He chuckles. “Yes my Queen. What’s wrong?” He collects the blood from my lip on his thumb and tucks it back into my mouth. “Surely you won’t miss me that much.”

I sigh, more like breathe out after I realize I wasn’t breathing. “This plan isn’t without its dangers. If..” I trail off.

“Are you worried you’ll be caught? I won’t let them put you back in that cell,” he urges me to believe him, gripping my legs firmly. “You don’t need to come. Noryth has made it very clear he liked his first plan better…”

I hand him the shirt. “I have to do this. Not just for me, but for every soul that haunts me. He’s killed so many, and he deserves to die at my hands. Just… just remember your promise? From yesterday,” I remind.

He nods but kisses my forehead. “Nothing is going to happen to you.”

He returns to packing and I watch him gather his things, noting what is left. When he’s done I follow beside him back to the dining room and Tiago is waiting for him. He doesn’t have any bags packed because he knows he’ll be right back, but the table has Wulfric’s armour and weapons ready for him. He pulls me close in one last hug before he gets ready, whispering soft promises of three days in my ear. I force a small smile and nod, but watch in silence as he suits up.

“Three days, I’ll see you at the party,” he smiles, kissing my lips.

He’s eager to put this all into motion, even if he is uneasy about leaving early, and still tired from the night. I can tell that much from him. I bite into my bottom lip, piercing it again and pull him in for another kiss. I guide him into taking my lip in his mouth and suck the blood from it. When he pulls away he looks visibly more awake and alert.

“Stay alive,” I warn him and he nods before Tiago takes him away.

“He’ll be fine you know,” Noryth tells me when they’re gone. “He’s a good fighter, and he won’t be alone. We’ve arranged it to keep Helion and Kheliq separate until the party. A few secret correspondence with Helion’s seal made that happen. Kheliq thinks Helion is staying away to appease you, so Kheliq won’t notice that you haven’t arrived with them.”

“How exactly do you get these messages?” I ask curiously.

“Helion’s party has check points and times that Tiago meets up with them. When we talk to Kheliq we unfortunately have to use birds. With magic as weak as it’s been getting sending them through fire has been impossible. They don’t always make it. Sometimes getting shot down or eaten,” he admits. “It works out sometimes because we could ignore Kheliq’s correspondence for the last bit and Helion can claim they didn’t arrive before he left.”

I nod. “It’s for the best this way.”

He looks at me even as I avoid his eyes directly, but I still notice his brows join together in the middle. “What is it?”

“This is going to be messy,” I say, fidgeting with my hands in front of me.

He nods. “But we already knew that.”

I shake my head. “Not like that…” I sigh and Tiago reappears beside me.

“We met up with them, no problems and it looks like they’re in good shape to make it to the next town well before dark.”

Noryth nods to him but turns back to me. “What do you mean? If you change my plan again..”

I cut him off abruptly. “I’m not changing it, more… amending.” They both eye me warily and I knock the doors closed with my magic. “When everyone convenes for the extraction… don’t wait for me.”

“Do you not think you can do it?” Noryth questions, looking at me angrily but Tiago looks more sad.

“No I can, and I will, but.. when I’m done, there will be no one to meet up with you.” I’m only looking at Noryth, willing him to understand. “You need to get everyone out and…”

“What do you mean without you?” Noryth interrupts, narrowing his eyes further.

I huff out a breath. “Just like I said. When I am finished with Kheliq I won’t be going anywhere.”

“But why… no.” He stares, wide eyed at me. “…. When you shifted.. I should have asked more questions. You’re mom isthatLeocidia?” He asks, I just stare in return for nearly a minute and then he continues on his own. “Helion mentioned the summit thing, but he made it sound like your mom was likely some noble’s daughter. But your mom….”

“It’s not an important detail,” I spit back, not wanting to hear that right now, “especially considering I’ve never met any of that family.”

“Nnoooo….” Noryth mutters. “What are the odds….? So you were telling the truth.”

“I do that quite a lot. Yet somehow you all are still surprised,” I return shortly, I don’t care about whatthisbrother thinks.

“But what about Wulfric?” He asks softly.

I wince. “I don’t think he ever believed me either.”

“But he’ll be heart broken, he lo….”

“Shut up!” I cut in. “You need to make sure he’s okay. Heneedsto be fine without me.”

“I’ll tell him,” Tiago interrupts. “We won’t let you do this.”

I reach over and touch his arm gently, then drain as much of his energy as I can without knocking him out. “You won’t. It will take you nearly the full three days to recover your energy enough to teleport, and by then you won’t risk distracting Wulfric. He needs all his focus to act normal and carry out his portions of this.”

Tiago gasps and falls to his knee, barely keeping himself from sprawling on the floor. Noryth looks at me horrified, like I’ve just stabbed Tiago in the chest. I wait for his next rebuttal, though I’m not sure why I care.

“You’re really determined on this,” Noryth says carefully.

I nod. “Determined enough that I know I can’t stay here. I know you’ll find a way to drug me or keep me trapped. Honestly, I commend you for it. You seem to really care for your brother, but I’ve been living for revenge so long that I don’t know who to be without it.”

“But he’s your mate!” Noryth demands. “He…”

“Be honest. If someone killed your entire family, everyone you’ve ever known, to kidnap and torture you for your blood, and youpromisedtheir spirits that you would kill him with your last breath to join them- for six years..?” I wave a hand at him. “I don’t have ask either of you that. I know you’d stop at nothing. It just so happens this is the only way.”

“There’s always another way, look at how we figured it all out before,” Tiago points out.

I shake my head and Noryth reaches forward and snags my wrist. “You were careful about saying too much in front of Helion, why are you telling us this? You could have stayed and kept it to yourself, or just left. Why say anything?”

I bite my lip. “I need you to keep Wulfric away from me.”

“What?”

“I need you to give him some order that keeps him from looking for me. Fuck, just tell him I bailed. Kheliq’s affinity, it’s foresight, that’s how he’s stayed in power so long. I know how to get around it, but he doesn’t. If he comes looking for me Kheliq could see that.

“On top of that, there will be absolute chaos when the king is found dead and all the magic that he put in place around the city starts to die with him. Wulfric needs to show a strong front and be able to take control. I don’t think he can do that if he’s the one to find me.”

“Don’tthink?” Noryth scoffs. “He’ll be a mess, he…”

“Have Ealdian change his memories, have Ignacio or, fuck, even Helion command him to get it together.” The words crack out of my throat painfully and they both looked at me with so much sympathy that my pitiful emotions were replaced with anger. “We never officially claimed each other, so he won’t feel me die. Make himhateme.Tell him I ran away in the night, whatever it takes to keep him going, or I fucking swear I will come back from the grave an haunt your ass forever.”

“Theodosine, please…” Noryth tried again.

I placed a hand on both of them, a couple stray tears falling down my face. “It’s the only way to guarantee he dies, and I’m smart enough to know there’s a reason you’re so fixed on doing it now. When you wake up, I’ll be gone. You won’t find me, so don’t waste the precious time you have left to prepare. I’ll see you at the party.”

I take their energy before they can respond, putting them all into a light sleep. They’ll wake up in around an hour, and by then I’ll be long gone. I lock the dining room doors behind me as I go to Wulfric’s room and start packing a bag. I have my own shoes now, but I had been fairly firm about no one bother to make me a bunch of new clothes. Still, I grab the few things they had insisted on and a few of Wulfric’s to keep me warm. After that I go to the kitchen and fill the centre of my bag with enough provisions for a day and a half. I hear Vera in the greenhouse and dash out the front door before she sees me.

Once I’m outside I start running into the woods until I’m deep enough that no one from the house can see me or would be around casually. Then I strip, stuffing all my clothes into the bag and shift into the animal. Noryth hadn’t been wrong that after my shift it wouldn’t take long for me to figure out the teleporting, but like him I need to see where I’m going still. Regardless, I can use that to disrupt my trail and sling my bag across my bag before taking off. I’m not sure I want to go where my heart tells me to, but I can’t stay around here so I leave the last home I’ll ever know.