Chapter 49
Colter's POV
I was 50 angry with her. I can't believe she would go against my wishes and talk with him in private. There should be nothing they can't talk about in front of me. I'm her f****g mate.
“Dude, you need to chill. Maybe she just wanted him to feel comfortable telling him whatever she needed to. I'm sure that she will tell you.” Grey linked me.
“No, we're her mate. We should be able to be there unless she has something to hide from us. Does she want to f**k him? That's the only reason she would want to talk to him by herself”
“She wouldn't do that. Chill the hell out man."
I started punching a tree in front of me. I was ready to murder someone. I caught her scent. I turned my head and saw her walking this way. I continued to punch the tree until she got there.
“Colter, stop this, you're being ridiculous. I simply wanted to ask him if we were OK and I wanted him to feel comfortable to answer freely and with my very jealous mate there he wouldn't have.”
50 he did still want her. I knew this was bad. Grey was now angry too. He was starting to see it my way now. I grabbed her by her arms and slammed her back against a tree. She let out a small scream. I tightened my grip on her arms. Grey was pushing forward.
“Tell me, Alexa, you still want to fuck him? Am I not good enough for you?”
“Stop, you're hurting me.”
“Answer me." I screamed at her. I was losing control and fast. I couldn't think of anything but those two sleeping together. “No. Please stop you're hurting me.” She said as tears started to fall from her eyes.
This snapped me out of my rage. I let go of her arms like they burned me. I could see a perfect imprint of my hands on her arms. Her tears were now flowing steadily down her face.
“Fuck you Colter.” She spat at me and took off running to the pack house.
I wanted to follow her so badly but my feet were glued to the ground. I couldn't seem to move. Grey started to push forward and I let him take over. As soon as we shifted, he looked up and let out the most painful howl I've ever heard.
He took off running as soon as he was done shifting. I let him do what he needed and run his anger and hurt out. He ran until he couldn't and it was pitch black outside. He finally headed towards the pack house. We got to the tree line and shifted back.
I had no clothes to change into since we shredded ours, so I walked back to the pack house naked and went to our room. Th door was unlocked but when I went in it was empty. Shit, did she leave us? I thought.
“Princess, where are you?” I tried mind-linking her but she had a block up. I tried pushing on it so she would let me in and it worked. She opened it up.
“Leave me alone, Colter,” was all she said, and then put the block back up.
I walked to the shower and turned the water on and stepped in.
“Grey, we screwed up so badly. We have to fix this. We hurt her”
He didn't answer but just whimpered in the back of my head. I guess I'm on my own for this one. I got out of the shower and went and laid down but sleep didn't come easily. Every time I fell asleep I dreamt of Alexa and the pain on her face when I had a hold of her yelling at her and I would wake up in a cold sweat. After the third time dreaming about it, I got up and threw on some gym clothes, and went to the gym.
When I got to the door I could hear someone on the treadmill and I could smell her before I even opened the door. My heart was beating in my chest so fast that I thought I might take flight. I opened the door and she was at a full sprint on the treadmill. She had sweat running down her back and I could see perfect black hand prints on her arms. Fuck, I can't believe did that. I needed to leave. I can't face her yet. I started to turn but she turned and saw me. I can't do anything now. I had to face her.
I started to walk towards her and she shut the treadmill off and walked over to some chairs where she had a bag and pulled out a water bottle.
“Princess, can we talk please?”
“Don’t f*****g princess me. Whatever you have to say, you had better hurry up.”
“Iam so sorry. I let my jealousy get the better of me. I would never hurt you and I don't know why I did that. I wanted you to listen to me and answer my questions. I was jealous and angry and I had it in my head that you wanted him still. You were honest with me about your relationship and when you wanted to talk to him alone my head went in the wrong direction wit! it
“All I wanted to know is if we were OK because we didn't end on good terms and I don't want me being here to cause any problems but he has found love with Nicki and there was never any chance of him and me the second you stormed that fielc while I was training.” She said as she started to cry.
Her tears were causing some of my own. I just needed her back. I couldn't live without her. I had to prove it to her.
“Princess, please don’t cry. I love you so much and I don’t know what came over me. Is there any way you can forgive me?" “Don’t call me princess. You don't get that privilege anymore. Right now, I am not ready to forgive you and you have a lot of trust to earn back right now. I want your stuff out of my room.”
“Please let me stay and prove it to you.”
“NO, I have been hurt by too many people in my life. I refuse to let my mate hurt me both mentally and physically.”
She grabbed her bag and walked out of the gym. I turned and watched her leave, when she got to the door she stopped and turned to me. She still had a steady stream of tears running down her face.
“Colter I will be out of the room by eight am, you can come to get your stuff while I am not there."
With that, she left the gym. I was still crying. I was losing her and quickly. I walked to a punching bag and let it have all my anger and sorrow and everything I was feeling. I had hit the bag enough that it was starting to crack open.
“Wow man, calm down,” Julian said as he came over to where I was.
Iignored what he said and kept hitting the bag. He walked behind it and held it in place for me. He didn't ask any more questions but let me get everything out. I was starting to wear down and was losing any energy I had.
“Alright, spill it. What is going on?” Julian asked me.
“Nothing” I bit back at him.
“You were crying when I got here. You beat my punching bag to death and you look like shit. So why don't you tell me what i going on?” He asked again.
“I screwed up big time. I ruined everything between Alexa and me.’
“Iam sure you can fix it. Tell me what you did."
“I hurt her. I was mad when she wanted to talk to you alone. I was jealous and thought she wanted you again. I stormed to the tree line while you talked. When she found me out there, she came over and I grabbed her by the arms and threw her up against a tree and yelled at her and wouldn't let go of her arms. She now has perfect black imprints of my hands on her arms. She has kicked me out of our room and won't talk to me.”
“Ya, you're right. You screwed up."
“Thanks man, you're supposed to help me."
“Let me talk with Nicki and see if she can talk to her. Nicki has a way with people.”
“Thanks man, and I know deep down that she doesn't want you, but I let my jealousy get the best of me."
“Ya you did, but you can fix this, but first you need a shower. Come on, I will show you a different room until you are allowed back in yours.”
He took me to a new room and I was going to shower but I didn’t have any clean clothes to put on.
“Princess, can I please come and get some clean clothes so I can shower?” I mind-linked Alexa.
“They will be outside the door.” She linked me back.
Ilet out a big sigh and headed to where our room was. I got there and my bag was sitting outside the door. I bent down to pick it up and that's when I heard her in there crying. I couldn't take it. I had to go in there and make her feel better. I turned the knob and it was unlocked. I walked in and quietly shut the door. Alexa was curled up on the bed hugging a pillow, crying her eyes out. I took long strides to the bed and got on the bed and pulled her to me. She just started crying harder.
“I want to hate you.” She said between sobs.
“Princess, you can hate me, you can beat me up, you can take a silver knife to my heart if you want. I deserve it and so much more!’
“I don’t want to kill you or hurt you, I just want to go back. I want to take back that conversation. I want to trust you. I want t believe that you won't hurt me again,” she sobbed out.
Iwas crying now and Grey was in the back of my head crying as well.
“I will never hurt you. Not physically or emotionally. I let my jealousy get the best of me and I will do anything you ask me to make this right. You just name it and I will do it.”
“I don't want you to do anything. It's going to take some time for me."
“Can I at least please stay in our room with you? I want to take care of you."
“I don't know yet, but you're right, you do need a shower.”
Ijust pulled her closer to me. I didn't care if I smelled bad, I just needed to feel better. I needed to smell her scent and feel the sparks that we feel when we touch.
“Please let me just hold you right now,” I whispered to her and kissed her head.
She didn't say anything but kept still. Grey calmed down a little in my head and laid down as well. I could feel that her cryin had all but stopped and her breathing was evening out. I closed my eyes as well and let myself relax. It didn't take long and fell asleep as well as her.
We were woken up later by someone knocking on our door. I got up to answer it and julian and Nicki were at the door.
“Hey, what's up guys?” I asked them.
“The new council members will be arriving in about thirty minutes” Julian said.
“OK, we will get up and be down there in time."
“Everything OK?" Julian asked.
“No, but it is better, I still have more groveling to do."
“Good luck with that man,” he said as they left.
Iturned around and found Alexa sitting up in bed staring at me.
“Princess, do you want to go shower? Your new council members will be here in thirty minutes.”
“Yes, I will be quick” She said as she got up and went to the bathroom and shut the door.