All I Wish for Christmas

When things get stressful ~

1. Enneagram #8 (Challenger): Needs to control her environment, but does allow herself to show some vulnerability.

2. Enneagram #5 (Thinker): Preoccupied with thoughts and imaginary constructs. She becomes detached, yet is high-strung, seeking isolation.

“The ladies are at the manger. Mary’s hosting the planning party,” Olivia explained as she and Tilly set off towards the table where the Nativity set resided.

“Planning party? In all the novels I’ve read they kinda skip over planning and just end up in their Happily Ever After. What are we going to do?”

“Oh, we’re gonna talk about all the little details you want. The dress, the food, the ceremony, and the reception.”

That didn’t seem so bad, Tilly considered, after all, how many options could there be? But two hours into the party, Tilly wondered if they would still be sitting there hashing out wedding dress designs for the next two weeks.

“I really like the bow tied around her waist,” Robin voiced.

“No,” Mary shook her head. “It takes over. It’s too large. She’s only a couple inches tall.”

“Well, what if we used this piece of lace and attached the bow to the bottom, as part of the train,” Dolly suggested, holding up white lace to Tilly’s back.

“Yeah, that’s real pretty,” Olivia agreed, while the rest nodded with enthusiasm. “What about you, Til? Whatcha think?”

She wasn’t sure, her mind so full of the different ideas everyone had thrown out, that she was getting confused. Conversely, she didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings by picking one person’s idea over the others. Now that everyone agreed on this part, she jumped at the opportunity. “I love it. The lace is gorgeous, and the pink bow matches my tutu perfectly.”

Olivia nodded, taking notes. “Great. Now, about the headpiece...”

By the end of the night, Tilly had only a half hour to spend with Trevor and Sammy before the sun rose and they went dormant again. “How’d it go, sweetheart?” Trevor offered her a seat.

“Oh, I’m exhausted. I think it would’ve been easier if it was just me and Olivia picking out stuff, but with everybody having different opinions, well, it was hard to keep up with. I did get my dress figured out though!” she smiled finally, her eyes sparkling with delight at the still-fresh idea that they were going to be married.

“That’s great! If there’s anything I can help out with, let me know.”

Tilly nodded, “Olivia said something about having us both go with her to choose decorations for the venue. I guess we need to pick out colors for our theme.”

At that moment, Sammy bounded over, “Tilly! I didn’t think you were ever coming back! Are you gonna tuck me in?”

“Of course! I told the girls that if they didn’t let me go tuck you in for the night, then they were going to have one angry angel on their hands,” she smirked.

The boys laughed and Trevor winked, “You? Mad? That’ll be the day. Go on, let’s get you tucked in Sammy.”

Tilly leaned down to kiss the snowboy on the forehead, pulling the cotton snow-blanket up under his chin. “I love you my sweet boy.” Her heart was so full that all the stress of tonight seemed worth it.

Stepping around to the front of the mantle with Trevor, Tilly sighed, “Olivia has me booked again tomorrow night, but I told her Monday I’m spending with you guys. She promised I could have a break.” She laughed, as she fluffed the giant bow on the front of the pine swag, ensuring the ends were the same length.

“With Olivia’s help, I don’t see why you shouldn’t have everything taken care of by then anyways,” Trevor replied easily.

“You would think so,” she agreed, continuing to tidy the mantle, pushing bits of dust over the edge.

Pulling her from her unconscious cleaning, Trevor grabbed her by the hand, twirling her into an easy spin under his arm, then capturing her in an embrace. “I’m so happy, Tilly. I’m just so grateful to have you—and thank you.”

“For what?” she queried, sure it’d be something sweet.

“For accepting. For wanting to be my wife and Sammy’s mom.”

All her cares washed away in that moment, and she melted as he kissed her once more before having to retreat to the Christmas tree. “See you tomorrow night. I love you, my soon-to-be husband.”

~~~~~

After Monday night, Olivia hit the wedding planning hard, and with a week left, the tiny angel was stressed out. Two weeks was definitely not long enough for planning, she decided as Olivia waited for her at the beginning of yet another grueling decision-making night. Halfway through the evening, Tilly was ready to run.

“So, you know how Captain and Candy were all uptight about the fireplace being unsafe for some of the plastic ornaments? Well, Jasper’s figured out how to turn off the fireplace—I guess it works via remote control. Anyways, we can go back to our original idea and have the ceremony here, and Jasper will just poke the button and turn off the flames just before the ceremony so we won’t have to worry about anyone melting. That is unless you have your heart set on the base of the Christmas tree. The only problem with that is that we don’t know how many...”

But Tilly interrupted, exhaustion and slight panic filling her voice, “Olivia, I really don’t care. I’m so tired of it all. I just want to get married already. I can’t seem to please everyone, and I don’t even know if Trevor is going to like my choices. What if he just picked red and pink because that’s what I wanted? Maybe he wanted red and green!”

“Tilly,” Olivia pleaded, as tears welled up in Tilly’s eyes. “It’ll be-”

But it was too late, Tilly already turned, flying up to her branch, and tucked herself deep within the plastic needles. All she wanted was to be left alone. She wanted nothing to do with what she or anyone else was going to wear, what she was going to say for her vows, how they were going to ensure everyone had a good view, whether or not anybody liked her color choices, dress choices, or food choices. In fact, she wondered whether any of her choices had really been her own.

What if I just tell Trevor that we should hold off on the wedding till next year. Would he be hurt? Sammy would, she acknowledged, pulling her legs up and hugging herself tight. Do I even want to get married if it causes this much stress already?

And with that thought, the first light of the new morning appeared in the sky, and Tilly realized that for the first time since beginning their tradition, she missed tucking Sammy in for the night. “Oh, I’m just a failure,” she cried before the Christmas magic dissipated, resetting them until the following night.