SWNOVELS Acts of Atonement: Chapter 16
I’VE MANAGED TO put all of the kids to bed and have commenced pacing palooza. Yup. I’m in the living area directly connected to the entrance and I cannot for the life of me stop pacing back and forth. I look like a worried mom on the lookout for their errant teenager coming home after curfew.
Sadly, the reality is much much worse. I’m on the lookout for my secret lover. A man who I shouldn’t even be having intimate relations with. God, if my dad or Ren found out, we’d be in a world of hurt. To be honest, I don’t even know if he owes me an explanation. It’s not like we’re officially together. He just gave me mind-blowing oral. Once. That hardly a relationship makes.
Whatever. I don’t care if I’m entitled or not. He had dinner with my aunt after trying to hide it and acted like it was some sort of business meeting. He’s giving me a fucking answer, whether he wants to or not.
The front door opens and closes just as I’m about to permanently mark the floors with all my walking. Quickly, I move to a wingback chair and act nonplussed, even though I’m anything but. “How was your meeting?” I bellow into the foyer.
“Isabella.” It’s funny how he only calls me by my full name when he has something serious to say. In this case, I can assume it’s going to be seriously bad.
“William,” I reply with an aloofness I can’t even believe.
William’s hair is tousled as if he’d either just had the dirtiest of sex or he’d been running his fingers through it in worry. I silently pray for the latter.
“I’m not sure what’s running through your mind, but whatever you’re thinking, I can assure you it’s not what it seems.” William walks toward me as he delivers the single most cliché line of all time.
Scoffing, I roll my eyes. “I’m not thinking anything, William.” I utter his name as if it were the most vile thing on earth. If he thinks I’m making this easy on him, he’s got another thing coming.
“Isabella.” There’s my given name again. “I spoke with Heather and know about the pictures she sent you.”
So that’s who the psycho caller was. Okay, this can be a good thing. That bitch is totally off her rocker. I mean, who walks away from William and an adorable daughter? I wouldn’t put manipulating the truth past her. Maybe the photos are old. Or photoshopped. Or… Ugh, stop making excuses and let William explain. “Okay. So, are the pictures fake? Were you not having dinner with my aunt?”
William grimaces and looks at me apologetically. “No. They are not fake.” Quickly, he puts both hands up as if trying to calm a wild animal. “But it’s definitely not what she made it seem.”
I take a deep breath in, trying to calm the nerves that have my body shaking with raw emotion.
“Explain.” The word comes out clipped and forced through gritted teeth.
“Mariana had new information on my father’s death. Since our families are close, she called me to run some questions before bringing her team in officially.” William’s face looks tired as if tonight’s events had caused him to age dramatically.
I feel a pang of guilt at the thought of William having to deal with his father’s death all over again but then it hits me. Why was the FBI involved in his death?
Noting the puzzled expression on my face, William explains further. “Your aunt is the lead investigator assigned to my father’s murder case.”
A gasp escapes me. How had I not known? Here I was, complaining about my mother, when his very own father had been murdered!
“Not many people know what truly happened in our home three years ago. We chose not to make the situation public in order to keep whatever sanity Ashley and I had left.” William runs a hand through his hair before continuing. “I need a drink.”
I silently walk over to the bar cart, and with shaky hands pour him a rocks glass of amber liquid. William walks to me, taking the glass from my hand. “Thank you,” he whispers as he brushes the back of my hand with his thumb. After what seems like an eternity of silence, he takes my hand in his and sits us down on the chaise. “Ashley walked in on my father’s murder scene while I was away for work. It was brutal, Bella. Fucking brutal.”
Licking my parched lips, I run through the various questions popping up in my head, wondering what to ask first. “Is that why she moved to Florida? Because of what happened?”
William nods. “She was barely twenty-two. Fresh out of college. I didn’t want to damage her further by keeping her in a city that served as a constant reminder of what she’d seen.”
“What about you? How did you handle it?” I scrunch my brows together wondering how this strong and beautiful man has been able to walk around with this secret weighing him down all this time.
“I fell into a parental role with Ashley and fucked the rest out of my system as best I could.” He chuckles sarcastically. “Despite all of the drama with Heather, I don’t regret it one bit. Out of my poor judgment came the beautiful light that is Harper and I wouldn’t change that for anything in the world.”
His love for his daughter warms my heart, temporarily making me forget what started this whole conversation in the first place. As if by divine intervention, Ashley chooses that moment to walk into the house, effectively cutting into the middle of our talk.
“Hey, guys. What are you doing up so late?” Her face is flushed and her appearance is disheveled. If this were a betting game, I’d say Ashley had just been out for a booty call.
William either doesn’t notice or chooses to ignore the current state of Ashley’s appearance. “We were talking about Dad.”
“Oh, so you finally decided to tell her about our cheating father?” Ashley blurts out, seemingly relieved to avoid any direct questions about where she’d been. However, the last part of what she said totally caught me off guard.
“Your father was a cheater?” I ask, scrunching my nose and narrowing my eyes.
Ashley’s face turns ghostly pale. “I mean…” She turns to William and glares. “It’s late, I should probably go to bed. Taking a monitor into the room with me in case the kids need anything. You two clearly need to have a talk.”
William scowls in disapproval. “We were having a talk before you came home. And don’t think you’re off the hook regarding your whereabouts tonight. We’ll be talking later.”
William turns to look at me once Ashley has disappeared back into the hallway, his face painting the perfect picture of peace and serenity. You’d think he’d at least look a little guilty, seeing as he was just caught in an omission. Wrong. And if I were to base my theory off of Ashley’s look of disgust, it was an omission that had been discussed ad nauseam between him and his sister.
“Oh no, mister. You aren’t going to smooth talk your way out of this. What did Ashley mean by your father being a cheater?” I raise a brow, silently urging him to continue.
“My father was a cheater.” William huffs, acting as if my question is annoying him. Me annoying him. “Want me to break it down for you? My father fucked other women while married to my mother. It’s not earth-shattering information.”
My mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water before I finally regain control of my vocal cords and find my ability to speak. “How dare you say it’s not earth-shattering? Cheating on your partner is a big deal,” I blurt out in disgust. “Is it not a big deal to you because the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree? Is that what you were doing tonight—cheating?”
William’s face is unreadable, showing nothing that would betray his emotions. “First of all, we are not together so I couldn’t have cheated on you even if I tried. Second of all, as I’ve told you before, there is nothing going on between Mariana and me. I’m not interested, nor will I ever be, in having a romantic relationship with your aunt.”
Out of everything he just said, one thing stood out as clear as day. We are not together. His words feel like a knife slicing straight through my heart, rendering me speechless.
Holding my head up high, I school my emotions and try to mask the pain he’s inflicted. “If there’s nothing going on between the two of you then why hide the fact that you were meeting up for dinner?”
“Discussing my father’s murder is not something you should be privy to. I simply shared this information with you to spare any hurt feelings Heather’s little stunt might have caused.”
My eyes begin to water. Unable to keep the first tear from falling, I turn my face to shield it from his view. Despite my best efforts, a treacherous sniffle gives me away.
“Bella.” William’s voice comes out as a gentle whisper. “I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you. It was not my intention.”
Here we go with the emotional whiplash again.
“No, it’s okay. I get it. We aren’t together. You don’t owe me a damn thing.” Wiping the tears away, I turn to look at him. “I guess that means I don’t owe you anything either. You’d totally be fine if I went out for some quick release, right?”
I know my words are extremely petty, but I can’t help it. My wounds are so deep I want nothing more than to lash out in anger.
Looking into his eyes, I see that I’ve hit my target and struck a nerve. The playboy doesn’t like to share. “Don’t look at me like that. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. If you want to go on dates and act like licking my pussy was no big deal, then so be it.” A devious smile forms on my lips as I see his face tighten in anger, allowing me to regain control. “This goes both ways, and since I’m unattached, I can go out on dates too. You aren’t the only man who knows how to use his tongue just the way I like.”
A low rumble emanates from somewhere deep within William’s chest. “You are mine.” His hand shoots out to the nape of my neck, bringing my face closer to his. “Your lips are mine.” He brings his other hand up to my face, his fingers softly caressing my parted lips. “Both, these” —William taps my mouth before pulling his hand down onto my pussy, clenching it over my mound— “and these.”
Unwittingly, a moan escapes me. How? How can I be so infuriatingly mad one second, heartbroken the next, and turned on in another?
William’s low chuckle breaks me from my inner struggle. “My little moon likes it when I touch her.” William’s fingers move back and forth across the exterior of my heat while his palm applies firm pressure to my clit. He might try and act as if he’s in control but his half-lidded eyes tell me he likes touching me too.
It takes all of my willpower but I manage to rip myself from his grasp. “If you ever want the privilege of touching me again, the parameters of our relationship need to be set.”
William wordlessly stares at me with an intensity that would cower a lesser woman. He might think this unfair, but I’m not putting my heart on the line for a nanny with benefits situation. “Look, it’s clear you don’t think of me as anything more than a convenient fuck, so I’ll do us both a favor and pretend whatever happened in the study was just a figment of my imagination.”
Without saying another word, I stand to leave and retreat to the safety of my room. Just as I think this night couldn’t possibly get any worse, my phone rings. My whole body stiffens as I read the Caller ID.
“H-Hello?” My voice shakes as I answer, silently praying that the caller isn’t the bearer of bad news.
“Yes, is this Ms. Moretti? This is Dr. Ansley. I’m calling regarding your father…”