Accepting My Twin Mates

Astennu

I couldn't help the little grin as I stared at the door where Evie had left.

“she’s adorable when she’s embarrassed, my wolf chuckled to himself.

But the levity didn't last. In true “Badru fashion’, my twin threw himself on the floor of his room, dramatically.

“I actually think I lost my a*s” he groaned, his voice becoming muffled by the carpet.

“Holy f**k. What're we gonna do?!" He raised his head. “She's gonna reject us and it'll be all my fault”

“If she does... itll be because of both of us..” I sighed, sagging down to the edge of his bed next to where he still lay on the floor. “..I hurt her just as much as you did."

My mind, on instinct, wandered back to the fateful incident and to the horror and panic I felt as a teenage boy.

“What you did was an accident. You can actually blame it on being a dumb kid. When the hell does a I6 year old make a smart decision anyway?!" My brother exclaimed, in his typical melodramatic way.

“No, what I did... I was a grown-a*s man and I said it to hurt her.” his breathing was becoming rapid and I felt a vice gripping my heart, streaming from my twin. He was having a panic attack and was transferring it to me, unconsciously, through our twin bond.

“Hey, hey," I slipped off the bed quickly and brought his face up to meet mine. “just breathe.”

I placed my hand on his chest and breathed with him to help calm him down. I had my fair share of these as a teenager afte the incident, seeing Evies face over and over again. I hadn't had them in years, almost a decade, but this was the first time I had seen my twin this panicked. He never panicked. He reacted and never considered the consequences of after. This had as many downsides as it did ups.

“She's giving us this chance, which is more than I thought she ever would. I tried to soothe him. “Evie could have rejected the bond straight away, but she didn’t. So no more avoiding and we be honest with her... and ourselves... just as she wants. Then, we pray.”

“So... how're your balls?” I smirked, trying to distract him, which was usually never difficult.

“I'm pretty sure she popped one of them,” he offered me a strained smile. “How's your face?”

“stings. I answered honestly, wincing a little when I scrunched up my nose.

“At least I'm still the pretty one,” he half-grinned.

I rolled my eyes. Well, that didn't take much.

Badru

Evie could kick like a hammer. I may have some testicular torsion from how hard she nailed me in them. But while I was shitting myself at what she would decide, neither I nor my wolf could stop thinking of one thing.

She said she didn’t hate us!

“We're at least two steps ahead of where I thought we'd be, Baniti wagged his tail.

“Ym curious what you thought the first would be?’

I dunno... grovel in front of the pack, maybe?’ And knowing my wolf, he would, too. “At least we have something to tease her about if she starts getting a little too uppity”

I randomly burst out in a small fit of laughter, cutting through the silence and startling my brother.

“She was a total badass, right up until she marched into my closet!” How red her face had become was the sweetest thing I could ever see.

Astennu chuckled from where he sat propped up against the bed, “maybe don't bring it up for a while, though?”

“Do you think she can shift?” I turned to look at him. Most werewolves shifted mere minutes after hearing their wolf, some didn't even get to hear them till after the shift.

“I don’t think so, but I thought it best not to ask right now.”

Probably a wise decision. Although if her pheromones were this strong now, what would they be like after she shifted? Her scent still lingered on my skin like a caress, driving me insane and driving other areas crazy, too.

Did our scents affect her in the same way? She barely seemed to react in the same way to our pheromones, except when she clung to my naked figure climbing up the trellis. I could've sworn I smelt the hot spiced vanilla of her arousal.

“Do you think she knows... about the mattress?” I wondered aloud.

Astennu shrugged, his eyes in deep thought and unfocused. The idea had been mine a few years ago, because I had overheard her talking to that tiny friend of hers about how uncomfortable her previous one was, and also because of how guilty I felt. I knew had I offered it directly, she would have thrown it in my face. And after what I'd seen today, she probably would have literally thrown it in my face. It was Astennu’s idea to coat it in our scents, but they would have probably faded by now and would be non-existent. That being said, at the time, it was comforting to know that our combined scents were surrounding her and possibly scent marking her in some way. Now I understood why that thought sent a possessive shiver down my spine.

“0k,” my brother stood. “I'm getting changed and going to see Heru. I think mom's given up on tea and I'm a little scared to mind-link her..” he shivered, with a grossed-out expression.

No one ever wanted to think of their parents getting freaky.

“Cool, I'm just gonna stay here in my pit of despair,” I raised my hand and flashed him a thumbs up while I went back to faceplanting the carpeted floor.

I didn't want to look up because even the walls of my room reminded me of Evie, a stormy blue... just like her eyes. Astennu’ room was no better; a dark gold, the same as her hair.

Goddess, how were we ever going to do this?

Evie

I needed to get back to work, but how the hell was I supposed to just carry on after everything? I felt physically sick with dread and nerves. What I needed was to scream into a pillow or sob till I became dehydrated, or simply empty a whole can of whipped cream into my mouth.

Taking a deep breath, I mind-linked the one person I could trust with this.

“Lucy?’

“Where the hell have you been? She cried out. “You've been gone over an hour! Did you get lost dropping off laundry?

“More like got lost leaving Evva howled in laughter.

I did not have the energy to deal with her right now.

“It's a long story... I sighed. “How much trouble am I going to be in if I disappear for a few more minutes?"

“Oh don’t worry. Janet is busy flitting around, I doubt she'd notice if her a*s was on fire. And the piano was fine, so you don't need to worry about it’

That was a relief. One less thing to fret about.

“The only thing you've missed is the Luna stopped by with new uniforms for us all. The guys look dapper as hell, and the dresses she brought for the she-wolves are stunning. I grabbed you one but I think I got the wrong size,” she apologised, but she had done more for me than I could thank her for. “Is everything ok? None of this feels like you.”

If you can meet me in my room, I'l tell you in person! I could already feel my eyes stinging yet again and I didn't want to have some random breakdown in the middle of the corridor.

“Ok, I'll try!

I closed my bedroom door, sliding down it and reaching the cold carpet. I only now noticed how damp I still was, how numb, The numbness wasn't from the wintery temperatures... what the hell was I going to do about the twins? Goddess, no wonder they ricocheted around my mind constantly, no matter how hard I tried to forget them. All this time, all these years, the mat bond had been silently screwing me over.

Which only made the past all the more bitter...

9 years ago

I remembered that I was walking home from the pack high school and that I had stayed behind. “Home’ was just the children's home for the few orphaned pups in the pack. The boy who walked beside me was a freshman like myself and we had been partnered for a project, something in English Lit. I couldn't remember the assignment and I couldn't even remember his name; I think it began with a “D7 But I do remember his intentions, which became apparent on the walk home We passed the old wishing well, not too far away from the pack house. It was used way back in the day, nearer the time whey the pack was only just being established and served as the closest point of fresh water for the pack house, known as a pack den back then. Over the years and as the well dried, it became nothing more than a wishing well. The boy had asked if I wanted to make a wish and I had declined. He threw his penny in anyway and I asked what he wished for out of curiosity. “If I say, it won't come true,” he smirked, biting his lower lip and stepping towards me.

He grasped me and tried to kiss me. I narrowly avoided his lips and pushed him away, but his grip still remained around my waist.

“Oh, come on. It's just a kiss,” he argued.

“I'm saving that for my mate though,” I tried to get out of his hold.

“But you're a rogue. Rogues don't care about that sort of thing” and he almost laughed, like I was being ridiculous.

He tried to lean in again, but I pushed back more aggressively.

“I said no!”

I wasn't quite sure what happened next. I remembered one of the Alpha heirs appearing, and somehow knew it was Astennu I didn't know why he was there or why he was so angry. There was a scuffle... shouting... and I tried to pull them apart, but Astennu’s elbow connected with my chest, making me stumble backwards... and all I felt was a weightlessness... then darkness, cold... and pain, all along my leg.

But there was also some strange, warm, comfort in the back of my mind, like I wasn't entirely alone.

I vaguely remembered being lifted. Time seemed to bend so strangely. I wasn't sure if I had been asleep for a few hours or a few days, or even a few years. When my eyes opened and reality started to form a solid picture instead of a wavy image, I realised I was in a hospital bed, in a dark and private room and it appeared to be nighttime. I was hooked up to a machine, steady beeping sound coming from it that had become elevated as I woke, and there was a clip on my finger and an LV line in the back of my hand. My head pounded too and I was thankful there weren't any bright lights in the room. As I took in the world around me, the door opened to reveal a male doctor.

“Hey, you're finally awake," he offered me a kind smile. “Think you can sit up for me?”

I nodded and he fiddled with the control of my bed to lift the back up, helping me readjust myself comfortably. His gentle ebony hand clasped the back of my head and he shined a bright light into my eyes.

I didn’t went to look up beceuse even the wells of my room reminded me of Evie, e stormy blue... just like her eyes. Astennu’ room wes no better; e derk gold, the seme es her heir.

Goddess, how were we ever going to do this?

“How long was I asleep.” I croaked, feeling my throat tight and dry.

“Only a few hours” he handed me the glass of water at my side and took my glass once I was finished. “You were brought in at 7:30pm and it's a little after I0pm. The incident happened around Spm.”

Incident?

Now I was more aware of my surroundings, I noticed my leg felt strange; constricted, aching and heavy. Dr Sanders must hav seen my expression because he lifted my blanket back to reveal the cast.

“You're real lucky. I've never seen a wolf spirit come forward so early in one of you pups.”

“What?” I asked, stunned.

“When Beta Kate got you out and brought you here, your leg was almost healed,” he pulled my blanket back down. “We put 2 cast on you, just in case and to give your leg some support. Your wolf must've kept you warm too, because you only had a mild case of hypothermia. I can only be jealous of how you wolves stay warm in winter. You'll probably have a headache fror hitting your head.”

Beta Kate got me out? Out of where? What happened?

“Don’t worry, a little confusion is normal. You might not remember some things, but it may come back... and Alpha Isaac will be here soon... to talk to you about what happened...” and the human doctor nervously looked at the door.

No sooner had he said the words that the Alpha himself appeared, with Astennu behind him looking shamefaced. The docto moved to leave the room, but Alpha Isaac stopped him.

“I expect this to stay completely confidential?” He left no room for argument.

Dr Sanders nodded and left quickly, leaving the three of us alone. The Alpha heir glanced everywhere but at me while he stood at his father's side. He was already tall and quite built for a I6 year old, but clearly nowhere near as much as his dad, yet. I had seen him around school and I had caught him staring my way a few times, both he and his brother. I never understood why, especially when I overheard their small friend group making comments about me being a rogue-born.

Why was it all so important to be kept quiet? Had I done something?

But when Astennu’s deep blue eyes finally met mine, I remembered... sort of. In his scuffle with that stupid boy, who I still couldn't remember the name of, he had accidentally pushed me and I had fallen down the well.

Iwas a “Lassie trope’. I was literally little Timmy who had fallen down the well.

And somehow my wolf had temporarily come forward to keep me alive as a survival instinct.

I looked between the Alpha and his son, stood at the foot of my bed. His eyes swept over me quickly before he spoke.

“The hospital staff tell me you're stable. Is this correct?”

His voice wasn't particularly angry and he sounded as though he showed some genuine concern, though it didn't detract from his stern tone. I nodded, feeling intimidated in his presence.

“Good. And this whole affair was simply an accident, yes?” He pressed, making me shrink back a little.

I looked down at my hands, not really knowing what to say in response. When I remained silent, he pushed further.

“I need some words, young lady, that it was an accident and no one else was involved. You lost your footing and nothing more?”

He was sweeping all of this away? To hide any involvement of his son? It was true that it was an accident. But I had been left down in that pit for over two hours... why didn't the young Alpha get help? I chanced a glance upwards, seeing Astennu look up at his father confused, as though he wanted to say something. But one warning glare from his father and he cast his sights down once more and remained silent, not refuting anything his father had said.

“Yes, Alpha,” I whispered.

What power did I have in this situation? I had no one to go to. No one to stand in my corner. The only option I had was to accept.

“Good. That boy, who started all of this, has been disciplined and won't bother you again” he concluded and turned to leave “Aste? Come along."

I looked up to see the Alpha leading his son out. Just as he approached the threshold, Astennu glanced at me one last time before his father's hand guided him out.

My teeth clattering roused me from my memory that was more vivid than ever of that day. I stood and moved to turn the heater on, warming my hands on the warm blast of air.

Astennu had just left me there. He didn't even try to help. And he didn't even try to stand up for me or take responsibility. “Do you know that for certain?’ Evva questioned.

“You can see my memories. Did it look like anything else? I snapped back.

“It looked like a young boy not knowing what to do. Have you ever stopped to think that there may be more?

“He was I6. He knew the difference between right and wrong, I huffed. Although... he did stop that boy from taking things an further.

“True. But, can you say you haven't done anything stupid?’ She raised her brow at me.

Well, s**t. Ewa knew I could have no argument to that.