A Thousand Heartbeats

The scent of old books hit me the second I opened the library doors, and I felt the slightest bit of the weight I’d been carrying ease from my shoulders. I surveyed the space, taking everything in, basking in the peace the library brought me.

There was so much information in this room, so many stories. Toward the front, there were low shelves to walk through, almost like a maze, and open spaces with desks for studying. When the afternoon sun came through these windows, it was spectacular; studying in here allowed me to both read and be warmed by the sun like a cat. Bliss.

It was also a vast room, with a walkway up around a second level in the back section, and ladders in the front that made me dizzy just looking up at the highest rungs. Some of the older books were chained to the shelves; if anyone wanted to remove them from the library, they had to get permission from the king himself and then persuade Rhett—who guarded the library as if it were a living thing—to actually follow through with the command. Our collection was so extensive that neighboring kingdoms would sometimes come and borrow from us. There were even buckets of sand hidden under carved wooden benches, meant to save as much of the library as we could in the event of a fire. It was fortunate we’d never had any such incident.

As I surveyed the space, basking in the peace the library brought me, Rhett walked around a tall shelf, chuckling.

“I was wondering where you were!” he exclaimed, placing a pile of books on a nearby desk and coming over to embrace me.

Rhett was the only person in the palace who didn’t bother standing on ceremony with me. Maybe it was because we’d known each other since we were children, or because he’d gotten his start as a stable hand and was used to seeing me messy and loud, but Rhett treated me like the tiara in my hair was just any other bobble.

“I’ve been a bit under the weather,” I told him.

“Nothing too serious, I hope,” he said, pulling back and flashing a wide smile.

“Not at all.”

He smirked. “What are you in the mood for today?”

“Fairy tales. Ones where they get everything they ever wanted, ones with a happily ever after.”

That smirk stayed plastered to his face, and he hooked his finger as if to say, Follow me. “Lucky for you, we got something new last week. And, because I know you so very well, my lady, I know for a fact that you haven’t read . . . this one,” he said, snatching a book off a high shelf, “in far too long.”

He placed the well-worn novel in my hand, and I wondered if anyone else here had ever read this but me. Sometimes it felt like I was the only one in the entire palace who bothered with the library.

“This will be perfect, actually. Comforting.”

“Take a new one as well,” he insisted, piling it on the other. “You read abnormally fast.”

“Not fast enough,” I said with a smile.

He stared at me for a moment, something unfamiliar passing across his eyes. “Would you like to stay and have tea? Or, even better, I found another lock for you to try. . . .”

I sighed, wanting to stay. But tomorrow was going to be exhausting. And tonight would be even worse.

“Save the lock for next time. I’m going to be better than you one of these days.”

“Will you be a superior leader? Yes. A faster reader? Of course. But quicker at picking a lock?” he said in mock outrage. “Never!”

I giggled. “One, we’ll see about that. And two, I won’t ever lead; I will happily live under the rule of my brother. Someday.”

“All the same,” he replied, his contented smile never fading.

“Thank you for the books.”

“Anytime, Your Highness.”

With that I was on my way. I’d been aware that my legs might bother me today, but being on my feet for so long was more painful than I’d thought it’d be. When the books slipped from my hands halfway up the stairs, I lunged a little too quickly—and I knew that something was really wrong.

I hissed at the searing sensation on the back of my left leg, and I looked around quickly, thankful I was alone.

I moved gingerly, taking longer than I cared to but unable to move any faster. Finally I reached my room, and pushed the door open.

“Your Highness!” Noemi cried as she rushed over and closed the door behind me.

I winced as I pulled up my skirts. “How bad?”

“It looks like a cut has opened up. The good news is, it’s just the one. Let’s get you to the bed.” She put her neck under my arm, and I slowly pushed myself upright. “What in the world did you do?”

“Ate food. Went to the library. You know how reckless I can be.”

Noemi chuckled as she laid me down on my stomach. “It’s nice to hear you make jokes again.”

I’d wondered about that, if laughter would ever come back. “Would you bring the books, please? So I have something to do?”

She ran back and fetched the books, setting them on my bedside table. I stared at the tattered cover beside the pristine one, grateful that Rhett had insisted on both. I was going to be bed-bound for the afternoon.

“His Majesty sent word that you had an important meeting tonight. He wanted me to prepare your best dress. I’d usually go with the silver, but seeing as this has opened, maybe something in a dark red would be safer?”

“That’s very smart, Noemi. Thank you.”

“This will sting.”

“I know.”

I tried not to make a sound as she did her work. The less she knew of my pain, the better. I lay there, trying to think of the words to propose to someone. Specifically, someone I had no interest in marrying.

I sighed, trying to push my disgust away. Mother and Father’s marriage was arranged, and theirs was a love so grand that its end ruined my father from the inside out. When Mother went missing, he was inconsolable for months.

So I knew firsthand that a marriage of convenience needn’t be a terrible thing. Besides, the palace was so large that we could probably make it through the better part of the week only seeing each other at mealtimes. I would still have my room and my library and my brother and Noemi. I’d still have the stables and all the faces I’d come to love and trust. I’d just also have a husband. That’s all.

As Noemi finished her task, I picked up one of the books, getting lost in a world where the people had all their dreams come true.