Zarafa and the Higher Power

While Dalwork was out, Zarafa hurried to get some human blood for him, ignoring the shame burning in her chest as she did so. It had to be done. He’s part of my happy ending now, like it or not. He’ll get over his fear, just like he did regarding me. ...I just have to make sure he survives his transition and doesn’t decide to die rather than become a vampire. She still knew, however, that he would resent her for killing someone to provide his blood, so she simply went to the nearest blood donation and magically lifted a bag before racing back to the house.

Sitting at the side of the bed she’d moved him to, she held the bag carefully in her long, pale fingers and watched his face for signs of his revival. His neck had a huge bruise on it, spreading from the area of her bite. It was the sign that her vampire magic had successfully entered his system. He would wake. And he’d be groggy as he did, leaving an opening for her to urge him to take the blood. She just prayed she’d be able to convince him.

She sat up with a start as a small groan escaped his lips and his eyebrows furrowed slightly. “Dalwork?” she urgently asked, leaning forward and inspecting his deathly pale face. “Dalwork, can you hear me?”

“Errm,” he moaned in response, his eyes beginning to wander a little beneath his eyelids.

“Listen, honey, I know you aren’t feeling well right now. I brought something to make you feel better. Will you drink it for me?” One eye cracked open and he stared at her without really seeing her. Biting her lower lip anxiously, she raised the bag to his lips. “Drink,” she urged. A drop of blood fell onto his bottom lip and hovered there before slowly sliding into his mouth. Letting out a small sound of appreciation, he latched onto the bag and began sucking down more of it. Zarafa slumped in relief. He would live. He would wake feeling angry at her, but they would be able to move past that. Everything would go back to the way it was supposed to be, and they would live happily together, forever. She’d done this for them. He would eventually see that.

As the blood rejuvenated him, Dalwork became aware suddenly of what he was drinking. Spitting it out, he sat up, a look of panic deep in his handsome features. “What did you do?!” he practically screamed, rounding on her. His deep blue eyes blazed with an anger and hatred she would have never expected and could hardly comprehend. “Zarafa, you selfish freaking vampire, what did you do?!”

Tears ran down her cheeks once more in the face of his wrath. “I had to,” she whispered, voice breaking. “I had to save you from your own stubbornness.”

“My stubbornness?” he shouted, leaping from the bed. “Or my humanity? My morals? You decided that you were right and I was wrong and wouldn’t listen to a word I said in explanation. I’ve been patient with you, my dear, but I’m afraid our time has come to an end.”

“It’s okay,” she stammered, rising to stand, blocking the doorway to keep him from leaving. “You can take a decade or two to come to terms with it, and we’ll still have all the time in the world left. My love for you will not fade.”

“What, once I’ve ‘gotten over it?’ Zarafa, you made a life-altering decision without me. You condemned me to an eternity of bloodthirst! You cannot claim that as love. You’re just a sad, frustrated vampire who couldn’t stand the thought of being alone forever. Well, guess what? Now instead of having decades with me, you only got the last few months, because I’m not spending a minute longer with you.”

“W-wait,” Zarafa gasped, scrambling to catch up with him as he sped past her. “I need to at least teach you how to survive as a vampire.” She hated how whiny she sounded, but she just couldn’t stand by and watch him walk away. He hesitated and didn’t immediately reply, his back still to her. “I owe you at least that much,” she mumbled to the back of his head.

Finally, he slowly turned and gave her a heavy look. After a moment, he nodded briefly. “You’re right. You owe me that and more. I suppose before I leave, you’ll need to make up for what you’ve done to me.”

She nodded eagerly, again frustrated at her own need. “Anything.”

“Be careful what you promise,” he slowly replied, his dark eyes glinting at her.

“I mean it. You mean everything to me.”

“Too bad you ruined what we had,” he bit back before turning and finally leaving the room. Once he’d gone, Zarafa crumbled to the ground, her body shaking with sobs. He was right. She’d ruined everything.

The next few days were a blur for her, so overwhelmed with sorrow and loss she couldn’t retain much of what was happening around her. Somehow she still managed to teach Dalwork about being a vampire, and he caught on quickly, despite his obvious, to put it lightly, distaste for the whole situation. Still, he knew he had to make the most of his new eternity, and put his strength into getting everything down so he could leave. Though he still had plenty of energy to make sure she understood that all of his malice was focused on her now- and always would be.

Once she warily declared him ready to move on from her, he brought up another request. “I need one more thing from you before I leave.” The way he said it left no room for argument, but she still agreed.

“Of course, Dalwork. Whatever you need.”

He took a step closer to her, his face settling seriously. “I need your help to remove my insignia.”

“You... what?”

“You don’t need to know why,” he replied, turning his face away from her. He never looked at her for longer than necessary anymore. “But I’m leaving the Higher Power. And you won’t tell them anything. Understood?”

“I... uh... yes?” she stammered, her mind feeling heavy with confusion. He wanted to not only leave her, but the Higher Power? Was that even possible? She knew they didn’t really let anyone go, unless they were exiled and sentenced to death if encountered later, but otherwise, once you received your insignia, you were a part of the Higher Power for life. Dying a human and coming back as a vampire didn’t count as a release from that. Still, his transition was her fault, causing his distaste for her to blossom into hatred, so she had to do what she could to remedy the situation. She’d do whatever he asked of her.

“Good. I already got everything ready that we’ll need.”

“You... planned this ahead of time?” Zarafa gaped. “Were you not a loyal servant to Dravyn?”

“I was at the beginning,” he replied, walking swiftly back into his house. “But it doesn’t take long before you realize the Higher Power doesn’t have your best interests at heart. Enough talking- you’ll help me because you owe me. You’ll also cover for me.”

“Of course,” Zarafa muttered in reply, trudging after him. When they reached his office where she’d turned him, she found he was right- he already had everything they needed set up in the room. There were books everywhere, where he must have been searching for a solution to get rid of the insignia themselves. He sat in the clear space on the wood floor and looked at her expectantly, holding out a piece of paper. Taking it, she read the spell he’d written there and tucked it into her pocket before sitting across from him and taking his Marked hand in hers. As she did so, she glanced up at his blue eyes, searching for a hint of any lingering feelings for her. His gaze remained dark as he waited for her to continue.

Sighing, she closed her eyes and began the spell. After a moment, his voice joined hers. “Snrev ogdnasel urhcih wey eeh tyort sed… meh tot krowl ads dnibh cihw cigame htesa eler… rewop reh giheht dnany vardot seitl laevo mer…”

Zarafa’s heart sputtered once, then twice, as the magic drained from her, as though the Eye was greedily drinking from her reserves. Just when she thought she and Dalwork would die attempting to remove the Eye, it lit up into the orange color, lifting from his hand. Flames then erupted, devouring the insignia until nothing remained.

Letting out her breath in relief, she and Dalwork slumped in exhaustion. Panting, Zarafa looked up and met his gaze. A new twinkle shone in his eyes, and the corners of his lips hinted at a smile. “We did it,” he grunted happily as he shifted on the floor. “I’m free.”

“Why do you hate the Higher Power so much, anyway?” Zarafa asked with a frown.

“We’re all just bodies for them to throw at their problems,” Dalwork replied, his gaze darkening as he stared at a knot in the wood. “We’re all replaceable. Don’t let them fool you into thinking they actually care about you,” he warned, rising to his feet as his strength returned. Zarafa did the same, though she felt unsteady and confused.

“W... what you’re saying is blasphemy,” she sputtered. “Not to mention that it’s not true. Dexter saved me.”

“After he decided you would be beneficial to the Higher Power,” Dalwork added, his voice heavy with meaning. “Think about it. He mentioned he saw you steal that food, and watched as you fought the vampire who turned you. Yet he did nothing to help. He merely took your body so he could ‘help’ you transition and appear as your savior. Everything he did was to get you on their side. Same with Astrid. I told you my story. I was much the same. They saved me once they realized I had something to offer them, and swooped in pretending to be heroes, when really they were simply taking advantage of my predicament.”

Zarafa’s face reddened. “N- no. You’re wrong. They... they wouldn’t...” Despite her defensive words, her mind pulled up memories to confirm Dalwork’s warnings. Most prominent among them: how easily Dexter had chosen Patrick over her. Patrick, who was a complete stranger to him. Over his most loyal follower. “They...” she choked before she could get any more words out. Was Dalwork right? Dexter had seemed only lukewarm to her during the year he trained her, but she thought that was just his personality. Some people only get so close to others. Yet, he had abandoned her with no regard to her feelings. Had everything between them been an act? To use her?

Dalwork’s eyes softened as he noted her distraught demeanor. “Zarafa... I suppose you could come with me. Maybe we can start over, see who we are without the Higher Power’s influence. I can’t promise we can get back to what we were, but you do still owe me. Having you by my side to help me adjust to living in a new realm would be... nice. You don’t have to serve Dravyn for the rest of your life, shoved into a near-forgotten realm to wait until he decides he needs you.” He stopped, glancing down at his watch. “But we have to leave soon. Dexter’s scheduled to come check on us in two hours, and he’s usually early. I have to go. Now. ...Will you come with me?”

“Where are you going to go?” she whispered in response.

“I can’t tell you,” he murmured, a tinge of regret in his voice. “I can’t risk the Higher Power following me. You just have to trust me if you’re going to come with me and leave them behind.”

Swallowing, she fought to keep herself from breaking down in front of him. He waited, his gaze anxiously raking over her face as he awaited her answer. Looking into those dark blue eyes, her heart broke once more. He may claim the Higher Power didn’t care for her, but... look what his ‘caring’ for her had done to her heart. He had hurt her more than the Higher Power ever could.

She slowly shook her head, lowering her gaze. “I’m sorry, Dalwork... I can’t. The Higher Power is where I belong. You’re wrong about them. ...Just like you were wrong about me.”

Dalwork sighed heavily, but reached out and retrieved his packed suitcase and began walking away from her. “So be it. But for your own good, I urge you to reconsider your relationship with the Higher Power. They do not have your best interests at heart.” Giving her a sad smile, he gave her a little wave as he walked backward into the portal he’d summoned, his body shimmering and disappearing. He was officially lost to her forever.

Wiping away her tears, Zarafa closed the portal behind him and readied herself for Dexter’s arrival, carefully considering how she’d tell him of Dalwork’s sudden disappearance. One thing she knew for certain- she couldn’t tell him that she’d turned him. Whatever Dalwork had said about the Higher Power, she knew at least that they expected her to have self-control... and turning him said she had anything but self-control.

Once she had that figured out, carefully scripted in her mind, she settled into Dalwork’s couch. The house felt as hollow and empty as her heart. As she waited for Dexter, her mind replayed the memories she’d made with him. She felt as though she were seeing them for the first time. The tough love he showed her as she trained she thought was just that... but she realized now he simply hadn’t cared every time she’d gotten injured. When it had gotten life-threatening, he’d gotten her healing serum from First Earth that fixed her right up, but otherwise, he let her hurt until she healed on her own. She’d been fine with it, knowing it would make her stronger, but... his eyes held no concern. She thought he’d changed after kicking her out of Zilferia, but maybe he’d simply dropped the act. If he truly was her friend before, that wouldn’t have gone away in mere seconds.

Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to ignore the growing rock in her gut. But the thoughts, the doubts, wouldn’t stop. Finally, one rose above the rest, seeming to shout above the clamor in her mind until she had no chance of ignoring it or brushing it off.

What if I’m wrong about the Higher Power?