Written In Black

Everything began to get cold, the frostiness made it’s way up my legs, creasing itself into my blood vessels, freezing me from the inside and out, gradually making its way up my body, then it reached my heart, a striking shock reached the core of it, the worst pain I’d ever felt in my entire life, it felt like it was tearing out my heart from the inside trying to come out, that pain followed through to the rest of my body, my arms, and legs, even to the edges of my fingertips, it felt like it tried to release itself from me. Then finally, it reached my head, this was beyond worse then before, I couldn’t even begin to describe the feeling, but it ran through my head too, and in a strange mournful way, through my mind as well, I tried to scream, but for some reason, I felt that I was the only one that could hear it, I felt trapped in my own conscious mind, I wasn’t fully there anymore, I could feel myself slowly drifting away piece by piece, was this is it, was it over?

Suddenly the pain began to gradually vanish from my body, and I could no longer feel again...

I had been lying on something hard and cold, my clothes were all ripped up and tattered. There were bright lights above my eyes, the noise stopped, the pain stopped, and for once, there was one thing that made me smile out of all of this, Peter. He was leaning over me smiling, not in a cheerful way, almost a tortured way mixed with an exhaust of relief. I tried to speak, but for some reason, my voice had somehow been locked out of my own body.

I tried to open my eyes wider than I had, but it just pained me more. Could I move at all? I reached for Peter’s hand with my own, only able to vibrate my finger tips. Peters smile fell quickly, and a tear had rolled down his cheek, he reached for my hand, a shocking feeling came from it, that made my heart jolt a hundred miles per beat, it almost pained me by his touch. And it pained me also, because I couldn’t speak to him, I couldn’t feel him, and most of all, out of all of this crazy mess, I wanted to reach out to him. Then suddenly, something miraculous happened, something I didn’t think I would be able to do anymore, I began to cry, I couldn’t handle this anymore, I needed to tell him, I needed to speak to him, I needed to have him hear my voice, and hear him when he responded.

It was a pain I grieved over for many moments, but then suddenly, out of all the strength I built up, my voice strained out a light, “Peter,” was all I could manage before I began to feel light headed, for some reason my breathing was almost…difficult.

I took slow and steady breaths, making sure I didn’t hyperventilate. Everything was different, everything was new, even my eyesight had changed after the accident. My body felt stronger, more secured and adapted.

I had been long lost in my thoughts until I realized there were two other people in the room with Peter and I. A man, with short blonde hair, gelled up in front. His eyes were an icy blue, almost like it had snowed in the day sky. And his skin was paler than ever, you could almost slightly see light vans piercing out the side of his neck, but his lips were as red as a solar eclipse, he was muscled up nicely, it showed especially because he was wearing a black v-neck that was a size too small, which showed his muscles even more. I guess he caught me staring because he let out a faint grin and nudged Peter and began to whisper only thoughts too small to comprehend. The other person was a woman, it was Scarlett! How had she survived the car crash, she was as good as new, no cuts, bruises, she had to have had some. She looked different from before, now her hair was even more fiery red and stuck out like it wasn’t--tamed or something. She had piercing green eyes that struck at me, they looked evil, but mentally, I saw kindness, I saw a friend, a familiar friend. I began to get that same feeling as I did at the coffee shop the day I saw her, the feeling of recognition.

“How soon can she?” I heard Peter say.

“As soon as she regains energy, which will take a while, this was very sudden, she was lucky to even make it this far, we will wait.”

“How long?”

The man shrugged, “A few hours at the most, she should be ready by tonight at the very least.”

“Can you tell me exactly why she was out this late--Scarlett?”

Her face got paler than ever, “I’m sorry--, it’s not like I intended for her to give me a ride--and besides, think of where we’d all be if I didn’t accept it, she’d be dead, and we’d be vulnerable, just thank me when you’re ready Peter, this was our only option.”

There was so much I wanted to yell and scream about right now, how had Scarlett known Peter, how soon can I do what? And what was their only option? I tried to speak but my voice just hurt more.

“Shh, I know Jay, I know, just be patient, like Sean said, this will all take time, so when you’re ready, just come out, we’ll be waiting in the lounge, there are clothes over there,” Peter pointed to a chair across the room, then gently he kissed me on the forehead.

“Just close your eyes and relax, it will be night before you know it.” Scarlett added.

“Actually,” Peter said, “I think I’ll stay here for a while.”

“Are you sure Peter, it might not be--”

“This is my girlfriend you’re talking about, I’m staying.” Hearing that made me feel more secure. Sean and Scarlett left the room, and Peter came and sat on the chair beside me.

“I’m so sorry this had to happen to you, I tried to keep you out of it, I tried to keep you away, I thought it was the easiest way to keep you safe, but sometimes easiest isn’t always the best way…I should have taken stronger steps for you Jay, I should have fought harder. You deserve better, and you definitely don’t deserve me.”

I wanted so badly to speak to him, I wanted to tell him it wasn’t his fault for whatever had happened to me, to Scarlett, and more importantly, I wanted to know deeply what was going on.

Talk to me Peter.

Then abruptly, Peter looked up, astounded. I gave him a confused look.

“You can speak to my mind?” Astonishment filled Peter’s eyes

How can you hear me?

He nodded, “I never thought….” Peter’s gaze shifted from mine, he looked down as if contemplating something then spoke, “Now we can talk,” Whatever he was going to say had vanished from his lips, “Where do I begin?”

You can start by telling me what exactly happened to me, why I can talk to you in my mind, why I can’t move, what is going on? I need answers Peter, it’s been too long.

Peter let out a deep breath and began to speak, “When the crash happened, Scarlett called immediately and told me what happened, her and I both knew you only had one option, death, or…..” Peter trailed off.

Or what? I asked, a little more scared than I thought.

“Scarlett isn’t human Jay.”

I tried processing this, What exactly is she then?

“She is a vampire, with many gifts, but changing someone, she would only do that to someone important, someone who needed to stay alive, someone like you.” He looked at me and brushed his finger against my cheek, wiping the tear that fell on it.

My head spun, so Scarlett, she made me like this, it’s why I can’t move, can’t speak, that’s why Scarlett hadn’t bruised. Another thought crossed my mind--for some reason, I had a feeling the people that had been looking for me, had been involved in the car crash, which made my insides grow stiff.

What did Scarlett see out on the road, she told me to look out, I saw nothing, A minute later, the car crashed. Was that, what has been looking for me?

Peter nodded, “They’re demons who work for a higher name, he is the one who controls them and makes the orders.” Something about the way Peter had mentioned the word ‘demons’ meant something me, but I couldn’t pin down what. Then I remembered my dream, and the parking lot, demons.

So who is this guy, what does he want with me?

“Something we should save for later.” Peter looked at me with an apologetic look.

Why are you involved in all of this, what has been going on with you lately? One minute you’re here, next minute you’re gone and then you tell me demons are after me?

Peter shook his head, “That is what I wanted to talk to you about, I haven’t been honest with you since the day you met me, there was so much I wanted to tell you for so long Jay, including what I am.” Nervousness filled his voice as he spoke.

And what are you Peter? My muscles tensed, and my breath caught in my throat.

“I’ve asked you so many times Jay, to attend church with me, there was so much you could have known, but have you ever heard of the term,” Peter let out a slight grin, “Angel?”

My heart practically skipped a beat, You’re an angel?

“Was,” Peter shifted his position so he sat closer to me, “A long time ago,” Peter glanced back at the door to see if anyone was coming, “God had given all of the angels free will,” Peter exhaled slowly and spoke again.

“We all had a choice and I’d made mine.” Sureness filled his words, like he didn’t regret those choices.

“That choice didn’t belong in heaven. I rebelled against god, and I was cast out of heaven. The archangels had ripped out my wings, and I fell.” Peter’s hand reached upward to his back as if expecting something to happen, but nothing did.

So, you’re a fallen angel.

He nodded.

How did you fall?

Peter smiled, but a hint of sadness came with it, “I was in love,” Peter said that with such simplicity that it seemed nothing could have been wrong with a simple angel falling into the most wondrous of things, love.

“In Heaven, it was considered an abomination for an angel to develop feelings for another, everyone was supposed to love the creator above anything else.” Peter shook his head.

“Do you understand?” He gave me a look that was pleading, almost as if I knew what happened.

I think I do, and I’m sorry Peter, I’m sure you’re reasons were strong for falling. Deciding to change the subject, I spoke again, I do understand though, do you remember that book I have been reading?

Peter grinned, “A broken fall?”

Don’t laugh, but yes, after reading it, I don’t know, I became obsessed with the terms and their meanings. I never told anyone about it, but I began researching all about this stuff, I read about the war that happened in heaven, the fall of lucifer, I read about the archangels, it became an interest.

“I never knew that, I wish you had told me.”

Peter quieted for a moment then spoke, “So what did you find while researching?”

I had read in one article that talked about how certain angels rebelled against god with free will, they were cast out of heaven, mostly because angels began falling in love with humans, they began to feel lust for earth, after the fall, angels began mating with humans, afterwards, they had children called the nephilim race, which means half angel and half human, I am pretty sure if this is all true, you don’t need to hear me blab about it.

Peter looked at me shocked, “I’m surprised Jay, I didn’t know you cared about that kind of stuff, especially considering your own boyfriend himself is a fallen angel.”

How, are you still alive, if you’re fallen, doesn’t that strip you of immortality too?

“I don’t know how the system works, but it was pretty obvious after living here for more over a millennium, that being fallen doesn’t strip you of everything.”

You’re kidding, and this is what I have to look forward to?

Peter let out a small chuckle, “It’s really not so bad…”

So are you going to tell me more about this higher name?

Suddenly a light knock came from the door, it was Sean, “It’s time.” I also noticed Peter had left immediately without saying goodbye.

Sean made his way to the chair next to me and sat down, then he brought out from behind him, a glass of red liquid--not liquid, blood.

“Thought you might be more comfortable drinking this way, for now,” Sean said, as he sat me up, I was able to sit up.

I took the cup slowly, pouring into my mouth, it was sweet, strong, almost…good. Suddenly, this heave of overwhelment stirred throughout my body, I needed more, than in an instant, the drink was gone. I began licking the sides of my lips, intending to gain every last drop there was. I felt stronger now, I began to stand up on my own.

“Thank you.” I managed to say.

“Yes well, it’s always the first drink that’s the best, that will have gained you your strength, how do you feel?”

“Better.”

Sean gazed at me with concern, “I am confused.”

“About what?” I sat up straighter, feeling more of myself now.

“Usually first time vampires such as yourself, are very anxious and nervous when it comes to blood, but you didn’t even hesitate.”

I shrugged, not wanting to get too deep into conversation.

He shook his head and spoke, “I will leave you to it, clothes are over there, you know where to go. Oh, and,” He reached out his hand waiting for me to shake it, “I’m Sean, we weren’t properly introduced before.”

I shook my head, letting out a wide smile, this guy was friendlier than I expected given his outlook, “Jay, you’re not--”

“First impressions can always be a drag, but you know what they say, don’t judge a book by it’s cover.” He let out the most amazing smile, and for a moment, I grew a slight attraction to that smile.

Sean turned to leave and then spoke up, “You’re taking this pretty well, why?” he asked once more.

I shrugged, “I don’t know, I guess I’m just not much of an enthusiast…I don’t know.”

“Interesting…so out in the lounge.” He nodded.

“Thank you.” With that, Sean left.

They were black; the shirt and boots, the jeans were a normal navy blue. And with it, came a red knitted scarf and a black leather jacket. I took a quick look at myself through the mirror, my hair was a wreck, there was a blue comb rested on the counter as well. I brushed out my long curved hair, I noticed it grew into a darker shade of brown and my face had become paler than ever. My eyes were still the same brown but I could tell in some way they had changed. I let out a wide sigh and led myself into the lounge.

Scarlett was resting atop of another guy who was sitting on the recliner chair, Sean was in the corner talking with another girl. And Peter stood cluelessly huddled to himself against the wall to the kitchen, he had his eyes directed on mine, I made my way towards him, but found myself standing there in an instant.

“I got to get used to that.” I chuckled.

Peter let out a small grin with a hint of a frown.

Sean made his way over to us, “Welcome to my place.” he smiled.

“Where are we?”

“Not too far from where you crashed, just a few miles down, this is my house...You know; you are taking this easier than expected.” Sean said again, why was he so concerned about it?

I shrugged, “It’s a big change, but nothing I can’t handle.”

Deciding to change the subject I spoke again, “How do you and Scarlett know Peter?”

“There are the good guys and the bad guys,” Sean spoke as he rested his hand on Peter’s shoulder, “Let’s just say we’re on the right side, some vampires choose who their allegiance is with, we made ours, Peter had too, we all represent something bigger than all of us alone...Peter has been with us for many years, he has…never really been--fond of vampires, that is, until now.” He gestured one hand pointing towards me.

“But why had he even aligned with you in the first place?” I crossed my arms.

Sean released a deep sigh and began to speak, “That my dear, is something you and your boyfriend should discuss...but when you crashed, that was my cue, Scarlett may know how to change a human, but to prepare one for the change, that’s why I’m here, we all have our own talents, mine for example, I can prepare one’s change, and I have power over the elements.” As Sean spoke, a slight breeze made its way up my neck, curling up to my cheek’s.

“That was you? So you can start fires, move air, water, all of that?”

“Pretty much.”

“Tell me more?” I was really hoping on a little more inside information about his allegiance with Peter.

“Well, unlike special powers, ones that only certain vampires can harness, each vampire receives the gift of speed, strength, immortality, and ready for this, mind-reading.

I gave him a confused look, he spoke, “Technically, we can only read human minds and speak only to vampire minds,”

Can you hear me Jay? This is what I’m talking about, we can speak to each other’s minds, but we can’t read them, only humans.

“I’ll take note of that, but how can I speak to Peter’s mind?”

Sean’s eyes widened, “You can speak to Peter’s mind?” I nodded.

“That’s never happened before.” Sean and Peter shared glances.

“What about me? Do you know if I have any gifts, besides the mind thing?”

“Well the only person who can tell is you, do you?” Sean crossed his arms and looked at me expectantly.

“How would I know if I had a gift”

“Simple, you just have to imagine it, go deep into your thoughts, unscramble the ones you already know and analyze the ones that are new, they are there, you just aren’t paying attention, if you have no talents, then there won’t be any new thoughts that come to mind, you could try it now, but it may take deep concentration and thought.”

“Well, I’ll try it later. Honestly, I can only handle a certain amount of crazy right now.” I laughed but my mind thought otherwise, I knew there was more that Peter wasn’t telling me, and Sean knew too.

Sean let out a light chuckle, “Yes well, first day can always be tough, you are still learning, you have plenty of time to clear your head, relax, and know everything will be fine.” Sean smoothed his hands through the air and a slight grin curved from his mouth.

“Are you some kind of psychologist?”

“Of all my years, no one has asked me that, but it would seem so wouldn’t it?”

Sean rested a hand on my shoulder, “If it makes you feel any better, there is a bright side to all of this.” Sincerity filled his words.

“And what would that be?” I was hesitant of the answer.

Sean gave me a confused look nodding his head back, “You and Peter are both immortal now, that has to mean something doesn’t it.”

Sean stopped short and spoke again, “Be happy you are, most of us never receive that opportunity.” Sean had a look in his eyes of despair.

“What do you mean, can’t you just change someone if you wanted to?”

Sean gave an uneasy look, “It’s not as easy as it sounds, unlike what you may think, if I had someone to love, I wouldn’t change her, not even if that meant I could be with her for the rest of my life.”

“Why not?” This didn’t make sense to me, if you loved someone, wouldn’t you do anything to be with them?

“Maybe you don’t think so, but this is not a life I chose, in the past, I’ve had to make sacrifices and mistakes I have regretted since the day I made them, which has led me to where I am today.”

“I am not proud of the man I am.”

I believed him, I could see regret lingered everywhere in his gaze.

“You were in love?” I spoke quietly.

“Once, but that love is long gone now, because of me.” A brief moment of silence struck between us before Sean spoke again, “You and Peter should probably get home to your mom before she has a panic attack, I remember the days mine had done the same, I’m sure things still work the same way today.”

I didn’t know why, but given the case that Sean had been so kind to me since I woke, I reached in and offered him a large hug.

“Thank you Sean, I’ll hope to see you again.”

“Same here Radner.”

Sean spoke as he wiped a tear from my cheek, “Why are you crying?”

I wiped my nose, “Just happens when I’m tired.”

A lie, and I think Sean knew it was a lie as well from his expression, but at least I knew the real reason I was crying. It was for Sean.

Peter made his way over cautiously, yet I didn’t know why, “Ready?”

I nodded and we left.

“So, why did you align with them?” I asked, hoping to receive a better explanation than Sean’s.

Peters hands tensed on the wheel, “I should probably tell you something Jay...a long time ago, before you or your own ancestors were born, I was in love.”

This must be who Peter was talking about when he explained how he fell from Heaven.

“With a girl I loved very much, she was the reason I had fallen, she’s gone now--she, she died because of me, she had been my one and only, until now that is,” he smiled to me, “but things got rough between us, and she died...let’s just say she is the reason I am aligned with Sean and the others..”

“That’s it, that’s all you’re going to tell me?” I wanted to know more, like who this girl was, why exactly Sean and Peter were aligned, who was after me which I still have yet to discover.

“All that you’re prepared for at the moment.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“That we should get you home. I promise you Jay, I will tell you everything, when you’re ready to hear it, right now, you nearly died, we have problems everywhere, and if we don’t get you home, your mom will be one more problem we’ll need to take care of.”

“I can’t believe you’re going to keep me in the dark.” I couldn’t stand lies, and from Peter, it was shocking and disappointing, I turned to the window to hide away my thoughts, I guess Peter understood that as well because the ride home was quiet after that.

I opened the door to leave but felt a grip on my arm, “Peter please--”

Without warning, Peter leaned in for a kiss, impeccable, it was like a jolt of heat overwhelmed my entire body on the inside and out, the only thing I knew, was Peter and I. Suddenly, I got this image of Peter, on a large horse, he was gazing at me, and dressed in old-fashioned clothing as well, it was like I had seen that Peter before. Immediately I leaned back, hands parting Peter and I.

“What is it, what’s wrong?”

“I--I think I saw something.”