Wildling

Note: Trigger warning! This chapter contains a rape scene. This does not in any way condone rape or abuse. If you are uncomfortable the scene starts on the italics so you can skip.

~~~Ember’s POV~~~

I felt uncommonly warm. My eyes fluttered open to the dim light that was drifting in through the window. My memories began drifting back to me. I must have slept most of the day. I shifted a little only to find my body wrapped between two, muscular arms. I looked over my shoulder to find Jax still asleep, his arms wrapped tightly around me as if he thought I would run. His face was buried in my neck. I slowly shifted around so that I was on my back while still staying in his arms.

My thoughts brought be back to my break down. I always tried to bury my emotions. What good does it do me to let them out. I can’t change anything so no use in dwelling on it. One of the perks on living alone is that no one can see you break when it happens. After my nightmare and seeing my brother again, I couldn’t hold it back any longer. The sorrow and longing. The fear of the past and the future. I was stuck in one place, never moving forward. Then Jaxson comes and swoops into my life.

He was so calm and caring about the whole event. He never pushed me or asked many questions. He never made me feel like a burden. He just did what he thought I needed. Comfort in the arms of another human being. His actions brought a smile to my face and I could almost imagine myself in a mated life. As my thoughts continued to run rampant, the smile faded.

I don’t know how to bring up my past or that I know what he is. He needs to know before he marks me. I must give him the chance of having a normal life even if it means misery for me. Once he marks me there is no going back. He will see all my memories and I, his. A tear tickled down my face. The probability of him rejecting me are high. What mate in their right mind would want someone as tainted, as broken, as used as myself? A sob wracks my body attempting to break free as my past flashed through my eyes.

*Trigger warning*

My head was pounding when I woke up. I could remember Trent dragging me from my brother towards god knows what before he knocked me out. I awoke in my old room in the pack house only it looked much different. My scent was still in the room, albeit faint. But where there used to be soft gray walls, they were now black with blood red trimming. The canopy that used to be over the bed is no longer there. All the photos are gone and there is a large medieval looking wardrobe in the corner. Dimitri’s scent was everywhere. I was lying on top of the bed with my arms chained to the headboard. I yanked my arms trying to break free of the restraints. My whole body trembled. I hadn’t eaten in days and standing in one place had depleted my muscles. I still couldn’t feel or talk to Aoralia.

Suddenly the door pushes open. My head snaps to the right as I make eye contact with those horrid red eyes that haunt my every waking moment.

“Someone’s been a naughty little wolf.” The look in Dimitri’s eyes scared me, full of a promise I couldn’t quite understand. My body shuddered in revulsion as his eyes raked down the length of my body as he slowly, tauntingly walked towards me. My face contorted into a grimace full of disgust. As Dimitri came closer and closer to the bed, I yanked harder on my chains. Come on just once can the world not be against me?! I pleaded in my head.

“It’s no use struggling baby. I always get what I want.” He knelt on the edge of the bed, hovering over my chest as he stared into my eyes.

“Why can’t you just let me die?!” I can’t take this torture anymore. My whole body protested its very existence. The one time I managed to escape was like a light at the end of the tunnel. I thought I was finally free. But the light faded to black. I got that small taste of hope and joy of freedom and then it crashed into oblivion when they found me a few hours later. I wasn’t able to get more than ten miles away. I had no ability to shift and had to run on my shaking body that kept threatening to give out on me.

I kept yanking the chains in a desperate plea to get away from my so-called family. Dimitri’s cold hand came up quickly to grip my wrists.

“None of that little wolf.” I fought the urge to vomit as he slowly glided his hands down my arms. Reaching my chest, he traced the outline of my breasts. I cringed and thrashed back and forth trying to get him off.

“Stop! No!” Tears began streaming down my face. He extended one of his talons and shredded my shirt and bra down the middle. I kept thrashing until he let out angry groan. He climbed onto me and straddled my waist to keep my legs from kicking. He stared into my eyes with an evil smirk as he slowly peeled away any clothing from my top half, leaving my chest fully free to his eyes. His eyes deepened as he stared at my heaving breasts. My breaths coming out in short gasps from the exertion of struggling. He brought his head down to my neck and sucked on the skin just below my left ear. He started to lick a path down my neck and chest to my left nipple. I whimpered, struggling as I felt his tongue on my skin. Burning me like acid.

“Stop it get off me. Please you can’t do this! Don’t do this! Just kill me please!” Sobs wracked my body as I pleaded with him not to take the one thing that was mine to give to my mate.

He swiftly latched on to my nipple, sucking until I felt his fangs puncture into this soft flesh of my breast. I let out a piercing scream at the pain. A fire burning in my veins. I could feel him drawing in my blood, feeding off me. He pulled back and lazily licked the holes closed.

“Your blood.” He gasped out. “It’s like nothing I’ve ever tasted.” He looked euphoric, his lips-stained red. He roughly smashed his lips onto mine. I laid there, limp, to drained to struggle. I kept my lips as tight as possible not wanting to feel his sloppy mouth on mine or the taste of my blood. He started trailing his grimy lips down my breasts, down my stomach towards my hips until he shredded what was left covering my decency.

I renewed my struggle to get free as he swatted the rest of the clothing onto the ground. I squeezed my eyes closed as my tears continued to fall when I saw him swiftly unzip his pants and fisted his cock while he looked at me.

“You’re going to feel so good little wolf. That pussy is all for me and I will take everything you have. I’m going to make you feel so good.” He is batshit insane. Does he really think I like, let alone want this?!

Sobs continued to wrack my body as I continued to yank my arms, thrashing my hips around to keep him off me. He moved in between my legs and roughly spread them, his arms firmly on each leg keeping them apart. He lined himself up and thrust forward.

A scream tore from my lips as I felt him tear through my body, destroying my innocence and tainting me for life.

I continued to sob in pain and mortification as he thrust in and out of me at brutal force and speed. The pain was excruciating. I felt like I was being torn in two.

“This tight little cunt is mine! I will take you whenever and wherever until you conceive.” I tried blocking him out as his groans and grunts continued until I felt him thrust sharply, stilling as his vile seed filled me. He pulled out and with one slap to my bruised self he zipped himself up, turned and walked out the door leaving me chained, naked and bleeding on the bed.

I could deal with the torture. When he raped me, it broke something larger inside me that I didn’t know was there. I thought I had been through hell until that happened. Now hell seems like such a mild term. And when the rape didn’t stop, I fell into a pit of self-loathing.

Why didn’t I try harder to get away? Why didn’t I kick him, or head butt him or something? I just laid there and let him have his way. I was disgusted with myself and I will be for however long I live. No mate would want that.

I pull myself from my thoughts as another tear falls. I glance over to my sleeping mate only to find myself staring into mesmerizing green eyes.

A/N

Just wanted to let you know the last paragraph is what she honestly thinks of herself. Keep in mind she has had no way to process what has happened to her. This is NOT what my views are. It is NEVER the victim’s fault and they should never feel mortified, disgusted or think lesser of themselves. I’ve never written a scene like this before so hopefully it was not too hard to read. I tried to downplay a lot.