Wild and Free

(Auden’s POV set a few hours after previous chapter)

There’s absolutely nothing on earth that breaks a person’s heart more than the pain filled cries of a young boy.

The entire way back, even as slow as I went, Ben’s whimpers could be heard, loud and clear.

I’m sorry, we’re almost there, I promise, I told him through mindlink just as we emerged on the edge of the forest at my apartment building. I crouched down and watched as Chris transformed back to his human form. Once he was done, he carefully helped his friend down from my back.

For some reason I guess I didn’t really think that at some point I would have to show them who I was too. It made me shake my head at myself.

I took a deep breath before morphing myself.

I could feel both boys’ eyes on me when I came out, studying them one they had only known as a voice in their heads so far that night.

“This way,” I told them, helping Chris carry Ben up the steps to my apartment.

After I unlocked and opened the door, I ushered them inside. We set the hurt boy on my bed and I ran to get the first aid kit, only stopping for a second to grab my necklace off the table and safely clasping it back on. I had decided against putting it in my pocket for some reason and left it on the table inside before I went out.

Once it was on, I went into my room and started wrapping an ace bandage around the boy’s swollen ankle, hoping it would help support it in a way that it would heal correctly and not out of place. Normally for me or any other fully grown wolf, the healing process probably would’ve already repaired his injury. But once again, growing pups were very different in more ways than one.

My gaze drifted to Chris who sat on the edge of the bed. His backpack had been discarded on the floor next to the bed. He was obviously worried about his friend, who would hiss at every slight movement that was made to his ankle.

“Hey,” I said, catching his attention. “Would you go in the kitchen and fill this bag with ice from the icebox?” I showed him the empty bag that was meant to be used as an icepack. Another thing I’d never used before, but I just hoped the small task was enough to distract his thoughts.

The boy nodded and took the bag, running out into the next room.

When I turned my head again, Ben looked back at me, studying me intently.

“Didn’t your mother ever teach you it’s rude to stare?” I teased, poking him in the stomach, making him smile.

He shook his head, “My parents aren’t home a lot. Just me and my brother.”

I tried to keep the sadness and pity from my expression, “I’m sorry. My parents aren’t around either.”

“It’s fine,” he shrugged, playing with one of the throw pillows on the bed. “I just think that you’re pretty. The older boys in my pack would like you.”

I laughed, “Why thank you. What a gentleman.”

He grinned again, to which I could not help but return.

Chris came back into the room with the filled bag that I gently set on his friend’s ankle. He winced a little but I think that the talking had distracted him for a moment.

I turned on the TV in my room for them, at their request and then went into the kitchen to grab them something to eat.

Coming back into the room a few minutes later, they were both in the same position, eyes glued to the screen that played some kids movie with talking animals and such.

“I may not be a gourmet chef but I have been told that I make a pretty good grilled cheese sandwich,” I smiled, giving them a plate with one on each.

The both dug in immediately, swallowing the food like they hadn’t eaten all day. Which they probably hadn’t. I was sure they’d probably been wandering around before lunch and by the time we were there in my apartment, it was in the late hours of night.

“Thank you Rio,” Ben said to me.

“No problem,” I replied.

“He doesn’t just mean for the food though,” Chris said quickly.

“Yeah, I mean we weren’t all that nice to you a little while ago but you still helped us,” Ben agreed. “We’ve been taught to never trust anyone outside our pack.”

“But you seem different,” Chris added

I partly smiled, “I would hope that was a good thing?”

The both grinned cheekily and nodded.

“Hey,” Chris started, “what happened to your hands? They’re all scarred.”

I glanced down at my palms. Part of my mind had forgotten about them. They were reminders of a bad time so I guess I could be grateful for that. It was a bit strange to me that Mason hadn’t asked about them again but again, something I shouldn’t be as curious about as I was thankful.

I shrugged, trying to pass it off as less than it was, “I was a clumsy kid, fell on my hands a lot so they got pretty badly cut.”

“And they didn’t heal?”

I shook my head, “I think that if it happens enough, which it did, it’ll leave a mark,” I lied. Partly.

They seemed to accept that answer so I breathed a mental sigh of relief. But it was pretty short lived because, as expected they had a lot more questions that were even more intrusive than that.

“Why aren’t you a part of our pack?” Ben asked curiously, his head tilted to the side.

Oh god. How could I explain that to a kid.

“Um, well I was with a pack, a long time ago,” I started. “But they didn’t want me, so I left.”

Chris furrowed his brows, “So you’re all alone?”

I half nodded, “Technically yes but I have great friends that keep me company.”

“Can you not just join a pack? I’m sure my father would welcome you, he’s our Beta,” Chris offered.

Well that was just great. Not only would their pack probably have countless search parties looking for the boys, but one of them was a part of a head family. How was I supposed to get them both back to their pack without being seen?

“I don’t think it works that way, they can’t just simply let me in,” I answered.

“That’s dumb, you’re like the nicest rogue we’ve ever met,” Ben said.

I scoffed, “Correct me if I’m wrong but, are I not the only rogue you’ve ever met?” I grinned.

They laughed, blushing because they knew I was right.

“Still, I don’t think it’s fair. I’m gonna ask my dad when we get-”

“No,” I interrupted him. “No one can ever know who I am. You can never tell a soul where I live or the fact that you’ve seen my face.”

They looked at each other and back at me, their faces fallen. It was as if they just then realized we were never going to see each other again.

“I know it would be really great if I could be in your pack, you guys are really fun to hang around with,” I told them, making them smile. I took a breath, “But I’ve done things that your pack would not accept me for.”

Ben bit his lip, “L-like, killing people?”

“No, no, that’s not what I mean,” I corrected him, trying not to frighten the children, though it was easy to forget how unaware and innocent they were. “It’s all a very complicated situation, so I’ll spare you the trouble. All you need to know is that I’ve lived this way,” I gestured to my apartment, “for almost two years. Your pack will remain here for years to come, you both will grow up, and I will not be a part of it. I will stay here and live like this. That’s just the way that it has to be.”

They both looked sad at the thought and my mind didn’t know what to think. Not more than an hour ago, Chris had wanted to pounce on me because they didn’t trust me. And then there we were, sitting in my apartment, stomachs full of grilled cheese and acting like I was some older sister to them. Maybe it was a children thing, or maybe it was a pack thing. It’d been so long maybe my body had forgotten how easily bonds form between werewolves.

I tilted Ben’s little chin up with my pointer finger, and smiled softly, “But I know that regardless of my presence, you both will do great things.” I ruffled both of their hairs and tried not to catch their saddened moods, however difficult it was.

We sat there in silence for who knows how long before their breathing because slower and turned into soft snores as they drifted into a peaceful sleep.

After I draped a blanket over the snoozing pups, I carefully slid off the bed making sure not to disturb them.

When I glanced back at them from the door, they were nestled together against the giant pillows that Cassie loved. They looked so peaceful, it was almost easy for the fact that they were missing from their families to slip my mind.

But another look made the voice in my head, the logical one, remind me that there were probably dozens of people searching for the small boys at that moment. And despite the fun we had had, the only thing on my mind was making sure I got them home without being discovered.

~*~

The next day, I called in sick to school, knowing that I couldn’t just leave Chris and Ben alone all day, it would destroy any trust they had in me if I just left them. So, we stayed in watching movies and getting to know each other a little more. The boys talked about how they had started Training and school and what it was like for them.

While talking with Mason and Kenzie and them caught me up on a lot of things in the world I’d been so distant from, talking with the little boys was informational in a different way. With Mason especially, probably because he was always under so much pressure, tended to forget to talk about the fun parts of being a part of a pack.

I had been avoiding checking my phone because I knew Cassie would be asking where I was. I couldn’t blame her though for being curious, I almost never skipped school. In my defense, it wasn’t like I had much choice. She didn’t have anything to worry about. But knowing her, she would worry anyway. I just had to hope that she would come by before I could get the boys home.

My plan was to wait until the evening, when I knew everyone would be at dinner, before following Mason or Mackenzie’s scent back to their territory. Hopefully the patrols would be widely spread, or at least enough so that they wouldn’t see me.

While Chris and Ben were messing around in the living room together, laughing at who knows what, I sat at the kitchen table finishing my letter. I signed it as “Rio” before folding and sliding the paper into a cream colored envelope.

“Hey,” I said, joining the two boys in the living room. “It’s almost time to go.”

Their faces fell slightly but they nodded in understanding. Both of them knew that we couldn’t stay friends forever and that they had to get home eventually.

“So we’ll never see you again?” Ben asked quietly, a sad look on his face.

I glanced between them, “I’ll be around. And know you can come to me in an emergency. But I’m afraid that this is the last time we’ll see each other for a while.”

“It isn’t fair,” Ben sniffed. “You’re not a Rogue! Rogues are mean and vicious and would’ve killed us both before even thinking about helping us! Someone would have to understand that.”

I shook my head, “They don’t care. A wolf without a pack is a threat in their eyes no matter what. I cannot join you there.”

They were quiet, their disappointment showing on their expressions. Chris’s face was less sad and more angry, his eyes brows knit, golden eyes not meeting my gaze, “And what if we don’t?”

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t listen to what you say,” he answered. “What if you’re wrong? Alpha Pearce might listen, he might let you in! Isn’t it worth trying?”

I closed my eyes and shook my head, “Not if there’s a chance that they’d reject me or kill me. I’m sorry you guys are just too young to understand. There are too many things that could happen. In the end the consequences outweigh the benefits.”

“But-”

“No,” I said sternly. “You have no idea how much I would like to stay with you guys,” I told them. scooting closer to them on the couch, putting my arm around them. “But an Alpha cannot just overlook someone like me and let me in just because you put in a good word for me with your father,” I said to Chris, handing him his backpack.

“But technically you saved us!” he said hopefully, like he had gotten an idea. He pushed the bag aside, “Doesn’t that mean anything?”

“Maybe. And I’m sure that your families and your Beta will be very appreciative of me for bringing you back. I just won’t know…” I muttered.

They both looked up at me, confusion written on their faces.

“What do you mean?”

“Yeah are you not coming with us?”

I shook my head in response to both questions, “I’m going to bring you guys as close to your border as I can but I can’t enter your grounds.”

The sadness returned as both boys and we sat there, in silence.

It almost made me mad how much I cared for the young boys after knowing them for such a short period of time. I wasn’t allowed to get attached and I did it anyway. God it would be so hard to keep away from them, and I’m sure that they would have to work hard not to tell their Alpha about me. It just had to be done.

The ringing of my cellphone jerked all three of us out of our silent daze. It was Cassie, again. I rubbed my temple, knowing I was going to have to come up with some sort of explanation once the boys were home.

I pushed the phone to the side and gave them a sad look, ushering them towards the door. Ben’s ankle had healed a lot the night before and throughout that day but her still walked on it a little oddly so I still planned to carry him in the woods.

My necklace was taken off, once again being set left in the apartment. I set it safely on my night table and then led the boys into the woods.

“Hey Rio?” Ben asked. I turned my head toward him in acknowledgement. “Why can’t we catch your scent unless you’re out here in your wolf form?”

I bit my lip wondering how much I would be able to explain.

“I have something that helps me hide. It masks my scent and other werewolves can only smell me when I don’t have it with me,” I answered vaguely.

He seemed to accept it, carrying on walking until we got enough away from the buildings where people wouldn’t see. Once we were in the clear, I shifted, nodding for Chris to help his friend onto my back.

It felt like deja vu, but instead of being in the pouring rain in the dark of night with two terrified pups, we were there in the warm sun, in the middle of the day, with two pups that didn’t quite want to leave.

When Ben was settled on my back, Chris shifted next to me, shooting me a look that said he was ready to go. I felt ben tighten his grip on the fur at my neck. Part of me wanted to believe that it was because he didn’t want to fall off but I was pretty sure that he was hoping that I wouldn’t leave. I was glad that I was in wolf form because they couldn’t see my grimace.

Why did so much of my mask have to be worn away in one night?

I shook away all the feelings, trying to catch Mason or Mackenzie’s very obvious Alpha scent. Once I’d caught it, I shot off in that direction of the woods.

My predictions had been right, their grounds were fairly far away from town. I guess it gave me a little peace of mind because it was so close, so I didn’t feel as stupid for not knowing they were there.

I got to the point where I could smell another wolf. Guiding the boys behind a big tree, I shifted and peeked around it to get a look at the wolf that I presumed was a patrol.

He was in his human form, looking miserable, probably because he was missing supper and was standing on the edge of the forest, alone. Or so he thought.

I turned to Chris who had shifted back, adjusting his backpack.

“Okay so you guys know where to go from here, right?” I asked them. They nodded, both of their eyes on the dirt beneath us.

I pulled the letter from my pocket and held it out to Chris, “Give this to your future Alpha, you know who it is. It’ll explain everything and he’ll know what it means. And don’t forget-”

“-don’t tell anyone where you live or what you look like,” Ben finished.

I sighed and pulled them into a hug, “Yes, but I was going to say, and don’t forget that you know where to find me if you need someone.”

They pulled back and Ben opened his mouth to say something when a voice in the distance beat him to it. On instinct, I pulled both boys behind the cover of the tree and we listened to the voice grow closer.

“...Get back inside!” one voice yelled.

“He’s here! They both are, I can smell them!” a second replied angrily.

They were only a couple of yards behind the thick tree trunk we hid behind.

I bit my lip to keep from gasping when I realized who the voices belonged to. Mason and Riley. It was because it was them but because of how close they were. I had to think of something fast. If they’d caught me, I didn’t think that I could lie my way out of it, even with all the experience I had doing it.

Stay here and wait for my cue, I mindlinked Chris and Ben.

Taking in a shaky breath, I squeezed the boys shoulders before I shifted.

Quickly I jumped, putting myself an okay distance from the boys and their pack before morphing back again. I slipped behind another tree so they wouldn’t see me. I had made sure I wasn’t far enough away where they couldn’t hear me but that meant that they could see me if I wasn’t careful.

Quietly, I picked up a stick that was lying on the ground and snapped it loudly.

“Over there!” Riley yelled, followed by quick footsteps as I’m sure he an a bunch of others ran towards me.

I dropped the broken stick to the forest floor and jumped back to the boys. They jolted at my sudden appearance.

I stood in front of them both and looked them in the eyes, “Goodbye,” I whispered.

With one last glance, I pushed them into them open and shifted back to wolf from, running in the opposite direction of the Royal pack and all that belonged to it.

~~AUTHOR’S NOTE~~

Hiya, so I’m getting to the real juicy stuff soon. Keep your seatbelts on and enjoyed this emotional rollercoaster because it’s gonna get bumpy ;)

Hope you enjoyed!

As always, comment, don’t hate, and read on!

~your Cheshire Cat loving friend